Matches announced for the show include Hernandez vs. James Storm, Taylor Wilde vs. Christy Hemme, and Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash taking on Team 3D.  Plus, will we hear from Sting about why he attacked AJ Styles at Hard Justice?  Where did Joe get the guitar from?  All this and more!

Results and analysis, after the jump!

iMPACT opens with a video package detailing Hard Justice.

Joe and Nash arrive at the iMPACT Zone and are met by Lauren.  Where did the guitar come from?  Joe says if Booker and Sting want to play tonight, we’ll play.  Things are getting interesting.  Nash doesn’t want to be involved in this situation.  Lauren asked him what Sting meant with his comments.  Nash says that Joe thinks things are getting interesting – but he doesn’t know half of it.

Hernandez vs. James Storm, Taylor Wilde vs. Christy Hemme, Joe & Nash against 3D, and maybe an answer from Sting still to come tonight, but first…

Rhino and Christian Cage def. The Rock and Rave Infection

Rave and Rhino start this one, which is a total mismatch.  Even after the War Machine tags in the Instant Classic, Rave is outmatched.  He runs over to his corner and tags in Lance Rock.  Rock takes control, but not for long.  The match goes back and forth from here, but the Infection take control after crotching Rhino on the ringpost.  After a few minutes on offense, they make the mistake of letting Rhino get the tag to Cage, who comes in and takes over, going for the Unprettier on Rave, but catches a boot in the face from Rock.  Rhino takes care of that though, then hits a GORE! on Rave, who also eats a Frog Splash from Cage for the victory!

To the back!  JB is with Kurt Angle and his shiny gold medal.  How’s Kurt’s neck?  It’s sore, it’s stiff, it’s injured.  He’s been wearing a brace all week long.  It’s Olympic week – or “Kurt Angle week” if you will.  Kurt beat all the best wrestlers in the world on his way to winning his gold medal.  Everybody says he’s the greatest – except TNA.  A last man standing match has nothing to do with wrestling.  Kurt’s a role model, he decided to abide by the rules, unlike AJ Styles, who cheated to win, and tried to break Kurt’s neck.  Thankfully Sting came to the rescue.  Tonight, Kurt gets to book the match – it’s going to be a gold medal challenge – no ropes, 3 two minute periods, and the winner gets the gold medal.  Kurt won the medal with a broken freakin’ neck, he’s going to beat AJ Styles with an injured neck tonight.  It’s real, it’s damned real!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

JB is backstage with AJ Styles.  Were you trying to finish off a wounded animal at Hard Justice?  AJ said that at Hard Justice, Angle would not get up.  That brought out Sting.  AJ says that Sting chose him to make an example out of.  Sting’s no different than Kurt Angle.  If he thinks he’s going to make an example of AJ Styles, he’s dead wrong! AJ accepts Kurt’s challenge.  He guarantees that Kurt’s gold medal will be coming home with him tonight.  Michael Phelps isn’t the only one who can take home gold medals.

Later on, Matt Morgan is in action, Christy Hemmy challenges Taylor Wilde, Hernandez takes on James Storm, Shiek Abdul Bashir debuts, Joe and Nash take on Team 3D, and Kurt Angle takes on AJ Styles in a gold medal challenge.

Lauren is backstage with Matt Morgan.  His goals are simple – his first is to realize his full potential.   His second goal is to become the World Champion.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Matt Morgan def. Johnny Devine

Divine starts off talking trash to the much larger Morgan, concluding with a slap in the face.  Beast from American Gladiators doesn’t like that very much, and then virtually destroys Devine.  He makes short work of Devine, finishing him off with the Hellevator.

After the match, Team 3D attack Morgan, but the lights go out and Abyss makes his way to the ring!  3D sacrifice Johnny Devine to the Black Hole Slam.  Morgan and Abyss stand face to face.  Morgan extends his hand, and Abyss shakes it.

Up next – shit I’m not going to review.  Yes, that means it’s Karen’s Angle.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

<STUPID KAREN ANGLE CRAP THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT>

Making that whole Karen’s Angle thing worse is that Kyp James was introduced as the Beautiful People’s.. IDK, gay bodyguard or something.  I don’t really care.

Gail Kim’s sister Katie is in the building.  Again, I don’t care.

Jay Lethal and Val haven’t spoken since Lethal unleashed the violence on Sonjay Dutt this past Sunday.  Val needs to choose, because Jay can’t take it anymore.  He loves her, but she wants to kill Sonjay.  This thing isn’t over until Lethal says it is.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Shiek Kareem Abdual Jabbar Bashir is set for action.  But first he’s going to rant about lazy Americans.

Shiek Abdul Bashir def. Black Machismo Jay Lethal

This one is a battle – both guys are fired up and trading blows in a frenzy.  Lethal is hell bent on destroying anything in his path, but Bashir holds his own.  He takes advantage of Lethal’s blind rage to take control of the match.  Save for a few moments of control by Bashir, this match is back and forth and fast paced.  Bashir jabbed Lethal in the throat with what looked like a drill bit, then nailed the “WMD” DDT to pick up the win.

After the match, Sonjay Dutt slithers into the ring.  He nails the Hindu Press 450 Splash on Lethal.

To the back!  Booker T is all crazy eyed.  What’s on his mind?  A silver and black guitar, of course!  He had Joe beat, but then a guitar appears.  He doesn’t know if it’s TNA’s idea of a joke.  There’s an old redneck saying – you mess with the bull, you get the horns.  You mess with Booker T, you get his foot up yo…  Nevermind, he’ll let his actions speak louder than his words.  He excuses himself, and JB tells us we have footage of Kevin Nash and Sting after Hard Justice.  Is it a conversation?  A fight?  A gay porn?  We’ll find out after the break!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

After Hard Justice, Nash asks Sting if he’s confused.  Sting says he’s not confused at all.  Sting is running out of patience.  His biological time clock is ticking real fast, and Nash should check his – it’s now or never.

Well, now it’s time for tag team action on iMPACT!

Team 3D def. Samoa Joe & Kevin Nash

Joe kicks off the match with Brother Devon.  And it’s all Joe at the beginning.  Brother Ray gets the tag, and even after a double team move by the former Dudleyz, Joe still maintains the offense.  He tags in the big guy, and Nash takes over the match.  Will he tear a quad?  We’ll find out after the break!  Interestingly enough, back from the break Team 3D are working over the leg of Kevin Nash.  Nash manages to get some separation from Team 3D, and get the tag in to Samoa Joe, who goes crazy, beating up the most decorated tag team of all time all by himself.  He manages to get Devon in the Kokina Clutch.  Devon taps out, giving Joe and Nash the victory.

After the match, Joe grabs a chair.  He gets in the ring and goes berzerk on Brother Devon until Nash pulls the chair away from him.  Earl Hebner scolds Joe, who punches him in the face.  Hebner reverses his decision, giving the DQ victory to Team 3D.

Christy Hemme and Taylor Wilde are strecthing backstage.  They’ve got a match, after the break!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Traci Brooks and her generic theme that sounds a little less like Aerosmith’s “Rag Doll” this week is on the way to the ring.  She’ll be the referee for this one.

Taylor Wilde def. Christy Hemme

Wilde starts off with a few armdrags, frustrating Hemme.  Christy manages to fight back though, and takes over, taking time to talk trash to everybody including the crowd and Traci Brooks.  Christy hits the FFG, but Taylor kicks out.  Christy goes for another one from the middle rope, but Taylor moves out of the way.  She hits the northern lights bridge suplex and gets the pin.

After the match, Awesome Kong and Raisha Saeed make their way to the ring.  Wilde attacks Kong as she gets in the ring, but Wilde starts pounding away at her.  Traci pulls Kong’s hair to get her away from Wilde, and gets slammed on her head for her troubles.  Saeed takes over the attack on Wilde, then goes and grabs a chair.  Saeed places the chair on the mat, but Gail Kim runs out for the save.  She hits Kong with a codebreaker style move, then takes out Saeed – but Kong takes advantage of Kim being distracted, and attacks her again.  Kong goes to hit Kim with the chair, but Kim moves, then dropkicks the chair into Kong’s face, then hits her again for good measure.  Kong and Saeed retreat as Katie Kim cheers on her sister.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Rough Cut: Consequences Creed

Still to come – Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles

To the back!  Lauren is with LAX.  How is Homicide?  Their answer is “You never do that to the familia” or something like that.  Hernandez is going to treat Robert Roode like the new kid on the block, or something like that.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Video:  Beer Money’s history with LAX

Lauren is with Beer Money.  She tells them Hernandez is upset.  This upsets Beer Money.  PSYCHE!!  Of course he’s upset, Beer Money beat them for the titles and permanently damaged the eye of Shawn Michaels Homicide.  They make fun of Hernandez’s promo, and say that when they pull up to the drive through at the taco place, it doesn’t matter, they’re going to get rid of another taco or bust employee.

BEER GOOD! MONEY GOOD!

Hernandez def. James Storm

Hernandez attacks Storm before the bell even rings.  Super Mex dominates early on.  Apparently Homicide is not even allowed in the iMPACT Zone because of how bad his eye is injured.  Jacqueline distracts the referee as Roode clotheslines Hernandez, giving Storm the advantage in this match.   Hernandez battles back though, using his strength to his advantage, tossing Storm around like a rag doll.  As he goes for a superplex, Jaqueline grabs his leg and prevents it, and Storm goes back on the offensive.  Storm goes for a powerbomb or something, but can’t get Super Mex up.  Roode saves Storm from a border toss, but gets knocked down off the apron for his troubles.  Storm goes for a cross body, but gets caught, then Hernandez puts Storm down with a sitout powerbomb for the three.

AJ Styles takes on Kurt Angle in a Gold Medal Challenge, NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Jim Cornette has some announcements to make:  Hernandez vs. Robert Roode next week, Gail Kim vs. Awesome Kong in a Knockouts Street Fight, and the main event for No Surrender is a four ways to glory match.  Joe will defend against three challengers to be determined via qualifying matches, starting with Booker T vs. Rhino next week.

2 points for a near fall, 2 points for a takedown, 3 two minute periods, a pin will win the match, winner gets Kurt’s gold medal…

Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles

Period One:
No ropes, amateur style.  This match theoretically will favor Kurt Angle.  The two minute timer starts, and this match is underway.  Kurt gets a takedown, giving him two points.  Then he gets another one.  It’s four-nothing just 50 seconds into the match.  A third at 75 seconds, and Kurt is up 6-0.  After one period, it’s 6-0 Kurt Angle.

Period Two:
AJ manages to avoid a few takedowns to start, and rolls Kurt up for two, which counted as a takedown and a near fall, 6-4 Kurt.  Kurt wrestles AJ to the outside, causing a break.  They lock up, and Kurt scores another takedown; 8-4 Angle.  AJ gets another takedown, and another two count.  After the second period, it’s tied at 8.

Period Three:
Kurt picks up two points by elbowing Styles in the face then taking him down.  The referee didn’t see it because of the position he was in, and it’s 10-8 Angle.  Styles takes down Angle with a belly-to-belly suplex, but he inadvertantly takes out the referee at the same time, thus not getting the points.  Kurt clotheslines AJ, then looks up.  The lights go out and Sting’s music plays.  When the lights come back up, Kurt has a black baseball bat.  Before he can use it, the lights go out again and Jeff Jarrett’s music plays!  When the lights come back on, AJ has the familiar silver and black guitar.  KABONG!  AJ nails Kurt with the guitar, knocking him out, and pinning Kurt as the referee comes to.  AJ has won Kurt Angle’s gold medal!

My Thoughts:

I can almost guarantee that AJ isn’t going to keep Kurt’s medal for long, as the two minute time limit in the third period had long expired before Styles hit Angle with the guitar and pinned him.  The Jarrett/Sting thing is getting interesting.  I was actually excited to hear Jarrett’s music.  I’ll be glad to see him back after everything he went through a few years ago.

Matt Morgan and Abyss as a tag team?  Knowing TNA it probably won’t actually happen, but how badly would those two destroy the entire tag team division.  Speaking of, Team 3D picked up a win over the World Champion and Kevin Nash, albeit by DQ.  Could that be a sign that they’ve renewed their contracts?  I guess we’ll find out over the next few weeks.  While we’re on the subject, isn’t it great that the new TNA Tag Team Champions, Beer Money, are spending their first couple of weeks as champions in singles competition?  You’ve also gotta love the fact that TNA is stealing the Shawn Michael’s eye injury angle and giving it to Homicide, while HBK’s storyline is still going on.  That’s ballsy, TNA!

Kyp James is an image consultant or something for The Beautiful People now.  Something along those lines, I really honestly didn’t care enough to pay attention.

The Angle-Styles match was great.  I’d love to see Angle in more matches that play up his amateur background.  Maybe put him against Concequences Creed in that kind of match, as they were playing up Creed’s amateur background in the Rough Cut segment.

All in all, this week’s show was pretty good.  Will it get the nod as the best show of the week in next week’s Podcast?  We’ve got three more shows and a pay-per-view between now and then, so only time will tell!

Post by thinksojoe

The founder of BoredWrestlingFan.com and it’s parent company, Fropac Entertainment, ThinkSoJoE has been a wrestling fan since he first saw WWF television in 1986 at the age of four. His first wrestling memory was Hulk Hogan on Saturday Night’s Main Event talking about getting King Kong Bundy in a cage at WrestleMania 2. Sixteen years later, he met Hulk Hogan on the eve of WrestleMania X-8. On December 9, 2013, he legitimately won a Slammy Award (Best Crowd of the Year). ThinkSoJoE currently hosts the weekly BWF Radio podcast.


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