Home ▸ RAW ▸ RAW 6/20/11 – Power to the People

Alright, it’s Monday Night around 1 AM which means I’ve been playing Spider Solitaire and completely ignoring my facebook and twitter accounts in an effort to avoid spoilers.  And since I was on a bus while this show was on and therefore unable to vote, it is my right – nay, my duty to complain about the results of each poll.  This is the first time the WWE is ever putting the power in the hands of the people (since they canceled the Cyber Sunday PPV), so this could be interesting.  Let’s get started…

… With CM Punk!  Fresh off of his victory over Rey Mysterio last night, the Straight Edge Superstar said last week that a drastic change was coming in the landscape of the WWE.  Punk pops a squat in the center of the ring and says that by the looks of the people, he wouldn’t trust them with the content of this television program.  What kind of awful decisions will they make?  After all, they chose to live in Baltimore, MD.  They can move, y’know.  Luckily, none of their decisions have anything to do with Punk tonight.  Punk says he’s the best wrestler in the world.  He soundly defeated Rey Mysterio last night, he soundly defeated John Cena last week.  Yes, wins and losses still mean something – and that means he’s the number one contender for the WWE Championship.  That’s a fact based on his accomplishments.  He asks for the Anonymous RAW General Manager to make it official.  Punk wants his shot at the WWE Championship in Chicago at Money In The Bank.  Consider this an old fashioned sit-in, because he’s not leaving until the GM makes the announcement that CM Punk is the number one contender.

Punk mocks Cole, trying to get him to hurry up.  And I quote:

“Mr. Punk, I understand your demands, and I will certainly take them under consideration.  However, right now, I’ll ask you to leave the ring.”

Punk seems amused.  He goes to say he’s not leaving, and the GM chimes in again.  And I quote:

“I suggest you leave the ring right now.”

Punk says that until he’s announced as the number one contender, he suggests the GM watch him make snow angels.  Which he lies down and proceeds to do.  The GM chimes in again:

“I was going to name you the number one contender later tonight, but since I feel a twitch of disrespect, now you’re going to have to earn it.  So tonight you will go one on one with Alberto Del Rio, and the winner will be the number one contender for the WWE Championship.”

Punk says he’s used to people making bad decisions, but ADR has one fluke win over The Big Show.  The GM strikes again:

“Now you’re number one contender match will be a triple threat match.  You vs. Alberto Del Rio, vs. Rey Mysterio.”

Punk goes to speak again, but his mic’s been cut off.  Punk protests to Michael Cole, but to no avail.

Who will Brie Bella defend her Divas Championship against tonight?  The choices are Eve, Kelly Kelly, and Beth Phoenix.  They’re all hanging out together backstage.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Brie and Nikki Bella make their way to the ring for a “Power to the People Pick The Opponent” match.  I would’ve voted for the Glamazon, but since I was on a bus with no clue what was going on, I didn’t have a choice.  Jerry Lawler gets his wish, because Kelly Kelly wins.

Kelly Kelly def. Brie Bella to become the new WWE Divas Champion

Well, the tone is set now for how terrible the voting is going to go.  Even as much as she’s improved in the ring over the past year or so, she’s still the weakest choice of the three.  Anyhow, Brie dominates in the early going.  Signs spotted during rest holds – “I’m too old for this” and a picture of Doink The Clown.  Kelly finally starts to mount a comeback and hits a Lou Thesz Press, followed by a bulldog, but Brie kicks out at two.  Brie tries for a pin, but Kelly reverses it and picks up the surprise win.  Kelly Kelly is your WWE Divas Champion.  No, that’s not a joke.

King gets in the ring and asks Kelly if she loves the Power to the People concept.  She thanks the fans for voting for her.

Video: Evan Bourne package.  Maybe he’ll get a push after his win last night.  Man, I feel like I should’ve typed “lol” a few times already in this recap.

Evan “Air” Bourne in action, against either Jack Swagger, Mason Ryan, or Sin Cara, NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Evan Bourne actually gets an entrance this week.  We’ll get to see who his opponent is in a second, and I’ll be completely shocked if it’s not Sin Cara.  The drumroll sounds, and we get the results – and the people don’t like Evan Bourne as much as we’d think, apparently, because they want him to get destroyed at the hands of Mason Ryan!

Mason Ryan def. Evan Bourne

Bourne uses his quickness to stick and move on Ryan, but that doesn’t last long before Ryan catches him.  He goes to work on Bourne as the crowd chants “BATISTA.”  So wait – did we vote for him just to compare him to Dave Batista?  Ryan dominates, as one would expect.  Bourne gets an occasional defensive move in, and then manages to take control of the match with a knee to the face.  Or so I thought.  Ryan hit a military press slam on Bourne and places him up on the ropes.  Bourne punches Ryan in the face, knocking him down.  Ryan gets up before Bourne can go for the SSP.  Bourne takes to the air a second time but gets caught with a Mason Ryan Uranage, and the big man picks up the victory.

Coming up next, it’s Mark Henry vs Kane in either a Body Slam Match, an Arm Wrestling Match, or an Over The Top Rope Match.  Those are awesome choices.  NOT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Next week is RAW Roulette.  Oh boy.  Can we just get a wrestling show instead of a gimmick show?

Video: Big Show assaults Mark Henry on SmackDown.

The World’s Strongest man got his revenge on Big Show last night, putting the big man down with a World’s Strongest Slam through the Spanish announce table, and he’s on his way to the ring right now.  Henry gets a mic.  Somebody will get punished when you put The World’s Largest Athlete and the World’s Strongest Man together.  There are two fundamental differences between the two of them.  When Show walks the Earth, the Earth shake, but when Mark Henry walks the Earth, the people shake.  Bigger isn’t always better, and when you’re dealing with the World’s Strongest Man, somebody’s gonna get they’re ass kicked.

What type of match will Kane and Mark Henry have?  We’ll find out NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

The fans have voted, and the best of the three terrible choices is apparently an arm wrestling match.  Yes.  That’s right.  They picked another match that will benefit the heel.  I’m sure that’s what WWE expected.

KABOOM!

Kane makes his way to the ring, and we’re set for arm-wrestling action.  No, that’s not a joke.

Mark Henry vs. Kane in an arm-wrestling match.

Henry tries to play mind games by stalling.  This is compelling television right here, folks.  Why am I paying for cable again?  Kane pulls away to stall, and finally we’re underway.  It seems pretty evenly matched, actually, but Henry finally starts to get the advantage, but Kane springs back to life before Mark Henry decks him in the face.

Kane grabs Henry by the throat, but Henry punches him again.  Then he hits Kane with the arm-wrestling table.  Henry starts putting the hurt on Kane on the outside of the ring, and then starts to dismantle the announce table.  He scoops Kane up, and plants him through the announce table with a World’s Strongest Slam.  Where’d this Mark Henry come from??

This lady is clearly impressed.

The fans chant “You Suck” at Henry, but I think for the first time in his career he’s doing stuff that doesn’t suck.  He chases off an EMT, telling the guy to “let him suffer, like I suffered.”  Henry says nobody’s going to get peace around here as long as he’s doing this.  I think if he keeps this up, Henry’s got his best run of his career coming up.

Speaking of the best run of their career, R-Truth is joining us, NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

The announce table is in shambles, as is Jerry Lawler’s phone, apparently.

Video: R-Truth is crazy.  And he lost last night, thanks to Little Jimmy.

Truth still has no theme music, and he’s here.  He says that he can see the people in Baltimore have no home training.  He’ll let them continue to act like the animals they are.  Are they having fun?  They’re glad they’re in charge, right?  Truth made a call to himself in his head – last night at Capitol Punishment, he didn’t think this thing out clearly.  He asked himself who would try to get him.  Maybe the computer, or maybe John Cena, but it wasn’t.  He got okey-doked by Little Jimmy.   He got got by Little Jimmy.  He knew it was a conspiracy.  All the Jimmys…

GO!

Christian interrupts.  He feels where Truth is coming from.  Power to the People?  Power to the People, what a complete joke.  You see, Christian’s been in this business 17 years and finally won the World Heavyweight Championship, but it was stolen from him 5 days later when he wasn’t 100% because these people decided he should face Randy Orton.  Since then, Christian’s had opportunities and setbacks, but it’s not his fault.  He blames horrible audiences like the one in Baltimore.  He blames the horrible GM, and horrible refereeing.  He asks Truth to watch this footage from Capitol Punishment.  Christian’s foot was under the bottom rope when the pinfall was counted.  He should be the World Heavyweight Champion.  Truth agrees.  Christian demands justice be served.  Christian tells Truth he needs one more shot.  Truth asks how many he’s had.  Christian says that’s not the point, he got screwed.  Truth says that at least Christian’s been Champion.  Truth has his title match last night and he got got by Little Jimmy.  Christian asks who Little Jimmy is.  Truth says that in Canada, they don’t have little Jimmy’s.  Here in America, all the Little Jimmy’s want him to be a good R-Truth.  A “Little Jimmy” chant starts…

AWESOME!

The Miz is here!  Really.  Really?  Really?  The two of them want to complain about what happened to them?  Bunch of crybabies.  Christian complains about a bad referee call and Truth is complaining about Little Jimmy’s.  A partial referee should not be physically involved in a match.  Alex Riley didn’t win the match last night, he had a victory handed to him.  Christian says things are a bit different than Miz says.  Miz fought his apprentice and was unsuccessful, but Truth and himself were actually in title matches.  Miz asks how dare him.  Christian asks the same of R-Truth.  Truth asks right back.  Miz asks, Really?  Really?  Really?  Christian says “Really.”  They all start saying “Really,” then Christian says “Riley,” to which Miz replies “Randy.”  They go back and forth, “Randy,” “Riley,” “Randy,” “Riley,”  until R-Truth pops in with “Jimmy!”

You know it’s the Mack Militant.

Teddy Long tells them to shut up.  He’s pretty sure that all these people don’t want to see the three of them blathering in the ring, they want to see them in action.  Tonight’s main event will be the three of them teaming up, and the People will choose the type of match.  Their opponents will be Alex Riley, Randy Orton, and John Cena.

Up next, the new United States Champion Dolph Ziggler will defend against former champion Kofi Kingston – it’ll be either 2 out of 3 falls, Vickie Guerrero banned from ringside, or a submission match, and the power is in the hands of the WWE Universe when we return!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Vickie Guerrero comes out and introduces the new United States Champion, Dolph Ziggler.  Kofi Kingston makes his way to the ring in his stupid Arachnaman gear (oddly enough, Brad Armstrong’s brother, Scott, is the referee), and we get the drumroll…

And the fans picked a 2 out of 3 falls match!  This should be epic!

Kofi Kingston def. Dolph Ziggler via disqualification

The bell rings and we’re underway!  Kingston kicks Ziggler out of the ring, literally.  He goes out after him.  Kingston brings the action back into the ring, and kicks Ziggler back out.  Kofi maintains the offense early on, going for the early first fall victory, but Dolph dodges a charging Kofi, who goes flying out of the ring.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

During the break, Ziggler hit a Zig-Zag on the floor, rolled Kofi in, and won the first fall.  Dolph is in clear control of the second fall as we come back.  Ziggler hits the Famouser, but scores a two.  Kofi hits the SOS, and takes fall number 2!  Third fall for the United States Championship!   Kofi manages to get up first, but it’s Ziggler that strikes first in the third fall.  Kofi catches Dolph out of a dropkick and slingshots him into the turnbuckle.  Kingston builds momentum, and scores a two count.  Ziggler rolls up Kofi and grabs the tights but only gets a two.  Kofi goes to the top rope and nails a back splash, but Ziggler kicks out at two.  Ziggler rolls out and grabs the US Title.  He tries to nail Kofi with it when Kingston comes out to stop him from leaving.  Kingston hits Trouble In Paradise, but when he rolls Ziggler in and goes for the cover, Ziggler barely grabs the ropes.  He rolls back out and tries to escape through the crowd, but Kingston goes after him.  Ziggler decks Kingston with the microphone, and loses by disqualification, which of course allows Ziggler to keep his title.

After the match, Ziggler tries to attack Kingston, but eats a Trouble In Paradise for his, well, troubles.

Michael Cole complains about Steve Austin making the decision to make this Power to the People.

Video: Austin whoops the RAW GM’s ass.

Up next, CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Rey Mysterio to become the number one contender for the WWE Championship.  Will it be a No DQ match, a Falls Count Anywhere match, or a Submission match?  Find out NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Shawn Michaels will be on Monday Night RAW next week, for some reason.

Justin Roberts introduces Alberto Del Rio, who is here in a $300,000 Bentley.  Del Rio grabs the microphone from Roberts, and introduces himself as per usual.  He’s been teaching a lesson to everybody.  A lesson in destiny.  He told The Big Show that what happened between him and Ricardo Rodriguez, and his beautiful car, was just an accident.  It wasn’t an accident, it was just destiny.  Bad things happen to bad people.  Del Rio’s win last night wasn’t an accident, it was just destiny.  He’ll beat CM Punk and Rey Mysterio, not by accident, but because it’s pure destiny.

This match is NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

It’s no longer snow angel time – “It’s Clobberin’ Time!”  according to CM Punk, who is on his way to the ring.  Rey Mysterio follows, and we’re set for triple threat action to determine the number one contender for the WWE Championship.  What kind of match will it be?  Let’s find out!

And the fans chose – a Falls Count Anywhere match – 66% of them!

CM Punk won a Triple Threat, Falls Count Anywhere Match to become number one contender for the WWE Championship.

All three men go for early victories to no avail.  It’s a near-fall fest!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

These guys are so quick, and this match is so action packed, it’s hard to keep up.  Del Rio goes after the arm of CM Punk, and then takes control of the match, until Mysterio turns things around.  He gets Del Rio in position for the 619, then gets Punk set up, going for a 2-for.  Del Rio bails and Punk catches Mysterio coming in, and things get a little crazy for a second, resulting in all three men being down momentarily.  A tower of doom occurs (that’s a powerbomb on a guy doing a superplex on a third opponent), with Del Rio scoring a two count.  Punk has to break up another Del Rio pin attempt, and Del Rio winds up taking himself out of the match.  Mysterio goes to assure that last statement but gets caught by Punk.  Mysterio catches a charging Punk with a boot to the face, hits a rolling senton from the middle rope on Punk and a suicide dive onto Del Rio in one fluid motion.  Rey scores two on Punk with a seated senton, but misses another high-risk move as Punk ducks.  Punk goes to the top, but gets caught by Mysterio who blows a hurricanrana attempt.  Del Rio takes advantage with the cross arm-breaker, but Punk drops a leg from the second rope on Del Rio for a two count.  Del Rio hits a running enziguri, taking out Punk.  Mysterio hits a 619 on Del Rio, then splashes him.  Punk tosses Mysterio shoulder first into the ring post and pins Del Rio to pick up the victory!

Punk takes the mic and says that on July 17th, it will be the most historic day in the WWE.  Not only is July 17th the second annual Money In The Bank PPV, it’s the night Punk defeats John Cena for the WWE Championship.  And the honesty that Punk was talking about is the fact that July 17th is the day his contract comes to an end.  That means, when the clock strikes midnight, and Sunday bleeds into Monday, he’s leaving.  And trust him when he tells you, he’s leaving with the WWE Championship.  I’m intrigued.

Up next, Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan, in either a Paper Bag Match, a No Count Out Match, or a Collegiate Rules Match.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Cody Rhodes is flanked by his baggers as he heads to the ring.  Daniel Bryan is, guess what, already in the ring.  The people have spoken, and 51% of them want a no count-out match for some reason.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

I actually wasn’t paying attention when this started, because I had no idea that Daniel Bryan was on SmackDown.  Anyway, Daniel Bryan picked up the pinfall victory.

After the match, Bryan locked in the LeBell lock, but he’s saved by Ted DiBiase.  Rhodes drops Bryan with an Alabama Slam, which Booker T says is a sidewalk slam, then Cross Rhodes.  Rhodes puts a bag over Bryan’s head.

There’s a new show premiering Thursday on USA.  I don’t care.

Up next, the power of the people chooses an opponent for Vickie Guerrero in a dance contest.  The choices are Booker T, Jerry Lawler, and Michael Cole.  I’d vote for Cole.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Did You Know? We’re only a handful of followers away from having 1,000 followers on Twitter – so follow us if you’re not already!

People voted for Kelly Kelly, who won the Diva’s Championship.  People voted for an arm wrestling match between Mark Henry and Kane.  People voted for Falls Count Anywhere between Punk, Mysterio, and Del Rio.

Matt Striker is in the ring with Vickie Guerrero.  He allows her to speak for some reason.  She says that last night Dolph Ziggler became the United States Championship, and tonight she’ll win the dance contest, because she’s had 15 years of dance training.  Her name used to be Peaches.  She quotes (and name-drops) Sable, and then she dances.  She calls Striker over, smacks his ass, then kisses him.  Who’s her opponent?  The WWE Universe chose Michael Cole!  Hooray!!!  He asks for our attention, and tells us to sit back and enjoy perfection.  He does the most ridiculous dance, and the worst Worm ever, and a terrible Cole-a-roonie.  It’s terrible – but intentionally terrible.  Matt Striker asks the fans who won – and Cole clearly won.    Vickie slaps Cole and says he cheated.

Up next, it’s our main event!  One fall to a finish, 20 minute time limit, or an elimination match with John Cena, Alex Riley, and Randy Orton taking on R-Truth, The Miz, and Christian.  I’d vote for an elimination match.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

R-Truth is out first.  The fans chant for Little Jimmy.  Christian is out next, followed by The Miz.  I can’t sit through this.  FFW!

79% of the fans voted for an elimination match.  This should be pretty decent.  Shit, Night of Champions tickets go on sale Saturday in my hometown of Buffalo!  Need to hang on to a few bucks for that one, since it’s one of my favorite Pay Per Views!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

John Cena & Randy Orton won a 6-Man Elimination Tag Team Match

This has been a good show, don’t get me wrong, but I’m burnt out at this point.  Please, please, please, no more of these 3 hour RAWs anytime soon.  I don’t even really feel like recapping the match, especially since I’m barely paying attention anymore.  A-Ry is eliminated first.  Miz is eliminated a while later and it’s down to 2-on-2.  Orton eliminates Truth, Christian eliminates Orton, and we’re down to Cena and Christian just like that.  Then Christian taps to the STF.

Alright, that’s it.  No more three hour RAWs for a while, huh?  Good show and all, but goddamned if three hours of RAW isn’t too long.  I can deal with three hour PPVs once a month, but a 3 hour RAW two weeks in a row with a PPV in between is far too much.  Here’s hoping that Punk wins at MITB, takes the title with him, and the World Heavyweight Championship becomes the only main title in the WWE.  I’ve wanted it to go back to one main Championship defended on both brands since they split the Undisputed Championship in ’02.  Probably won’t happen, but one can dream – especially when he falls asleep reviewing the main event of a three hour RAW.

Goodnight, folks!

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