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Alright, this is my first time posting this myself, so forgive me if it comes out looking a little weird or anything!!

So, I had to start about a half hour late, due to class and trying to eat.  However, my friend, @Niki_Sushi covered me on what happened, though I didn’t miss that much.

Apparently, Smackdown General Manager, Theodore Long and RAW General Manager, Bret Hart, have asked the Miami audience to vote on what match should happen later on.  I don’t know what the choices were, but the result is Edge vs Randy Orton in match, where Edge will have one hand tied behind his back.

Next, the fans vote between a bodyslam match, a submission match, or an Over the Top Rope match for Big Show and Chris Jericho.  They chose a BodySlam match.

Big Show vs Chris Jericho in BodySlam Match

Show hit him in a submission, and then threw him over the top rope anyway.

Big Show wins.

Who will face the Hart Dynasty?  The Usos, The DudeBusters, or Hornswoggle and The Great Khali?  Vote now!

<COMMERCIAL>

@TKeep123 For tonight’s #RAW I’m actually going to try and believe that internet voting really counts! :} #WWE #BWF

We come back to RAW to see the Hart Dynasty in the ring.  Matt Striker tells us that The Great Khali and Hornswoggle will be facing the Hart Dynasty.

Unified Tag Team Champions The Hart Dynasty vs The Great Khali and Hornswoggle

Not sure what happened, but it was a quick match.

Hart Dynasty wins.

The Usos attack, but Hart Dynasty finally managed to gain the upper hand and kick the Usos out of the ring.  As Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler are talking, Jerry starts looking around, and then says that they have a problem, and then walks off.

SMACKDOWN REPLAY: Kane found Taker in a vegitative state over Memorial Day weekened.  I have no idea what happened here, because I wasn’t here.  Either way, just sounds like what was on Smackdown.  Up next, the cast of The A-Team arrives!!

<COMMERCIAL>

@Bruce412 Is King going to go get JR to save this damn show? #WWE #BWF

Justin Roberts introduces the cast of The A-Team, but only Bradley Cooper comes out.  He says that he’s not sure where the others are, but The A-Team opens in theaters nationwide on Friday, and he says that he’s excited to host RAW tonight.  The screen moves, and we see Jerry Lawler walking around backstage.  People stop him, but he claims he’s looking for someone.  The other two cast members from The A-Team show up and King says that someone stole his crown.  Rampage says that he thinks he knows who has it, and they leave.  However, the Bella Whores I MEAN TWINS start talking and talking, and I don’t know what they said, becuse I don’t like them!!

Next up, Santino comes up, and we’re told that the choices for this match are either an actual match, an arm-wrestling competition, or a dance-off.  Three guesses what this one’s gonna be…

<COMMERCIAL>

Vladimir Kozlov comes out and gets in the ring, and then Matt Striker tells us that the fans voted on a dance-off.  Surprise.  Surprise.

Santino Marella vs Vladimir Kozlov in a Dace-Off

Santino starts first and it’s surprisingly not that bad.  I mean, it’s not that great, but it’s not that bad.  He does the running man, I believe, turned his Cobra move into a dance move, a Chippendale type thing, and then ended it with his Cobra again.  Now, it’s Vlaidimir’s turn.  The Moscow Mauler shows that he actually does have some kind of rthym, and manages to win.  Oh, and Cole, it’s not vintage if he’s never done it before.  Shut up.

Vladimir Kozlov wins dance-off

He does some weird ass belly roll thing and then dances with Santino, and leaves the ring.  Whatever.  Next up, you vote on the Diva’s action!! Either a six-on-six Diva Tag Match, a Diva Battle Royal,  or a Champion vs Champion match!!

<COMMERCIAL>

All the Divas come out to the ring to Eve’s music, and Jerry’s in the ring.  He says that you all voted, and the Diva’s match will be a Diva’s Battle Royal!

Divas Battle Royal

I hate trying to cover Battle Royals, because my ADD kicks in.  Anyway, here’s the order of eliminations: Rosa Mendes, Tiffany, Kelly Kelly, Alicia Fox, Gail Kim, Nikki or Brie Bella, Brie or Nikki Bella, Layla, Michelle McCool, Eve Torres and Jillian Hall.

Winner: Maryse

Later on tonight, Edge takes on Randy Orton, with one arm tied behind his back.

Sheamus makes his way to the ring (I assume), and is stopped by Kane, who says that just because Sheamus is on RAW and not on Smackdown doesn’t mean that he’s off the hook.  Sheamus took out Triple H to make a name for himself, and Kane says that Sheamus would do the same to The Undertaker.  Sheamus says that he wouldn’t be shy about it, and he’d do it out in the open.  Sheamus goes on to say that he doesn’t take kindly to false accusations, and Kane says he doesn’t take kindly to liars.

Next up, yu choose who Sheamus should face: Kane, Mark Henry, or Evan Bourne.

<COMMERCIAL>

@steveaustinweb Natalya couldn’t be in this one!? #RAW

@ThingsColeSays If Kane set Sheamus’ hair on fire, would anybody even notice?

We come back to Sheamus in the ring, and a flashback to last week.  You know, where Evan Bourne teamed up with John Cena to actually be in a main event?  That they won? AGAINST SHEAMUS AND EDGE?!  That one.  Matt Striker then says who the opponent is, and OMG MARK HENRY GOT RID OF THE KOOL-AID MAN GEAR!

Sheamus vs Kane

Holy condiment man, Batman!! Sheamus looked freaked out, which made me happy, because it was just like the old days!  You know, when Kane didn’t lose every other match to guys like Dolph Ziggler. Anyway, the match begins, and Kane immediatly gets the upper hand and hurls Sheamus over the top rope.  He follows Sheamus out of the ring, beating on his arm for a bit before thowing him back in the ring.  Kane goes up to the top turnbuckle, but Sheamus knocks his leg out from under him, and hits him with some forearms.  Sheamus then hits a running powerslam, though it looked more like a waddling powerslam to me, and goes for a cover.  Kane kicks out at two, and Sheamus dominates going into the commercial.

<COMMERCIAL>

We come back to see Sheamus going for a cover, but Kane kicks out a two.  So, Sheamus tries his luck at a submission, but Kane powers out and pushes Sheamus into the ropes, dropping a big boot on Sheamus’ head.  The two exchange slaps for a minute before Kane gains the upper hand, Irish Whipping Sheamus, then clotheslining him.  He hits a sidewalk slam, then his usual dropkick to the mouth, and goes for a cover.  Sheamus kicks out at two.  Kane goes to the top rope and hits a clothesline on Sheamus. Kane goes for a chokeslam, but Sheamus kicks Kane in the gut.  Sheamus misses with an Axe Handle, and Kane goes for a chokeslam.  Sheamus gets out and counters with a backbreaker on Kane.  Sheamus then goes for his big boot, but Kane goes for a chokeslam, and simply shoves Sheamus out of the ring.  Sheamus gets back in and goes for another boot to the face, but Kane counters with the chokeslam.  Sheamus rolls out of the ring, and doesn’t get back in.

Kane wins via Count Out.

Later on, WWE Champion John Cena will fight World Heavyweight Champion Jack Swagger, Rey Mysterio, or CM Punk

<COMMERCIAL>

@Niki_Sushi gotta admit it. I love the photo-shopped sling on Randy.

Congratulations to Wade Barrett for winning NXT!  The NXT ring announcer, Savannah, greets and congratulates Wade for his win.  She asks what it’s like to win, and he tells her that asking him that is like asking a genius how it feels to pass a school exam.  He says not to ask him that until after he makes history later.

Ted and Virgil are talking about Viewer’s Choice, and Ted says he should be running the show.  Rampage and Murdoch (I know I’m mixing names here, but I don’t care) show up and say that they know that Ted has Jerry’s crown.  Ted says he could buy whatever he wants, and the last thing he wants is Jerry’s crown.  Murdoch says that he’s going to bring out the lie detector, and Ted says they don’t work.  Rampage gets nose-to-nose with Virgil and says that it’s not that kind of lie detector.  IRS shows up, wearing Jerry’s crown, and says that since Jerry never paid backtaxes on the jewels, it’s his.  Ted then says that he knows who they are and that the crown was only bait.  Smoke fills the room, and Murdoch passes out as Ted, Virgil, and IRS grab Rampage.

Next up, R-Truth and The Miz have a tag team match!! You vote on their tag team partners.  For Truth, you can choose Christian, MVP, or John Morrison.  For Miz, you can choose Dolph Ziggler, William Regal, or Zack Ryder.

<COMMERCIAL>

R-Truth comes out and says that the WWE Universe had the power tonight to pick his tag-team pertner, and he wants to know who it is.  So, the poll comes up and it was John Morrison!!  Next, The Miz comes out, saying that the WWE Universe obviously doesn’t know what they’re doing.  They chose John Morrison, after they chose Khali and Hornswoggle to face the Hart Dynasty, and then chose Vladimir to do a dance-off, so Miz doesn’t care who his partner is.  All that matters is that Miz wins tonight so that he can go about getting his United States Championship back.

United States Champion R-Truth and John Morrison vs The Miz and Zack Ryder

Miz and R-Truth start it out, and Miz gets the upperhand.  Truth manages to avoid Miz, and hip tosses Miz.  He then tags in Morrison.  They Irish Whipped him at the same time, and hip tossed him together.  Morrison grabs Miz and tags Truth back in, the two double slam, and then Truth goes for a cover, but Miz kicks out at two.  Miz kicks Truth in the face and tags in Zack Ryder.  Ryder hits Truth with a neck breaker, and then goes for a cover, but Truth kicks out at one.  Ryder moves and tags Miz back in, and Miz kicks Truth in the gut.  He punches Truth in the face, kicks him in the head, and then bounces off the rope to kick Truth in the face.  He then covers Truth, only for Truth to kick out at two.  Miz gets Truth in a headlock, and Truth tosses Miz behind him, and they’re both down.  Truth goes to tag Morrison, and Miz grabs his ankle, only ending up in pulling off his shoe as Morrison is tagged in.  Morrison hits Miz with a clothesline, then an Irish Whip into a flying chuck.  Morrison then knocks Ryder off the apron, and hits Miz with a knee to the face.  Morrison goes to cover Miz, but Ryder breaks it up.  Truth comes in, smacking Ryder around, until Miz grabs Truth.  Truth then slaps Miz, Ryder shoves Truth out of the ring, and Morrison kicks Ryder out.  He then turns his attention to Miz, who moves so that Morrison’s shoulder meets the ring post.  Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale, goes for the cover and wins with a three count.

The Miz and Zack Ryder win.

Edge and Bret are talking backstage, and Edge says that it’s not fair.  Bret says that, fair or not, it’s going to happen.  Edge walks off, and Bret starts to walk away, only for Kane to come out and call Bret out.  Kane says that if he finds out it was Bret, then he will be in a vegetative state, just like the Undertaker is.

<COMMERCIAL>

@jenrae73 My 50yr old alcoholic Aunt has the same shirt R-Truth is wearing 2nite. #Raw #WWE #BWF

Edge vs Randy Orton with Edge’s hand tied behind his back

Edge comes out, and there is a flashback to last week, when Randy RKO’d Edge in the ring, and Edge retaliated by slamming the door shut on Randy’s shoulder.  Randy comes out afterward in a sling.  The ref ties Edge’s arm behind his back, and then the match begins.  Edge goes for a clothesline, but Randy ducks it.  Edge goes for a kick, but Randy ducks and retaliates with a clothesline of his own, and proceeds to stop on Edge.  Randy went for a left-handed RKO, but missed, and Edge knocked him down.  Edge manages to get his arm free and goes at Randy’s shoulder before the ref pulls him away.  Edge breaks away from the ref and does it again, before the ref calls for the bell.

Randy wins via DQ

Edge moves to the opposite corner and prepares for the spear.  He goes for it, but Randy kicks at Edge and then kicks him right out of the ring.  He then follows Edge, but Edge had a chair and hits Randy’s shoulder with it.  When Randy goes down, Edge hits him again with it.  As Edge walks backstage, Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole tries to figure out if Edge knocked Randy’s shoulder out of socket.

<COMMERCIAL>

We come back to Evan and John talking to each other about last week.  Savannah comes up after Evan walks away and asks Cena how he feels about not knowing his opponent tonight.  He says that he feels better about this match that he does about Fatal 4Way, since he has to face three different men.  At least in this match, it’s just one.  Besides, he feels that the decision is left up to the most able-bodied decision makers on the show: The WWE Universe.

The camera goes to the locker room where Murdoch was, and Mean Gene is talking to him, saying that he has a chance to surpass the previous A-Team, and he hopes that Murdoch will do a better job of it then Josh Matthews did of replacing him.  Murdoch seems to get an idea and takes off.

Drew McIntyre makes his way to the ring, and Teddy Long comes on, saying that the choices for Drew’s opponent are Yoshi Tatsu, Goldust, or a Mystery Man!!

<COMMERCIAL>

Drew McIntyre vs Mystery Man… Matt Hardy!

Obviously not surprising, the Mystery Man is Matt Hardy.  When Matt comes out, Drew grabs a mic and says that this match isn’t happening because Matt is suspended.  Teddy comes out and says that, unfortunately for Drew, Matt’s only suspended from Smackdown, not from RAW, so the match is taking place.  Drew starts to say something, but before he can say anything else, Matt smacks him and then tackles Drew.  Matt hits a clothesline and throws Drew out of the ring, bouncing his head off the announce table, and then throwing him right into Michael Cole.  Matt then hurls him into the barricade, a ring post, then headbutts him before getting Drew back in the ring.  Drew manages to retaliate with a kick, but they’re both down.  Drew runs at Matt, and Matt moves, sending Drew right into the pole.  Matt hits the Twist of Fate for the win.

Matt Hardy wins

Matt continues to assault Drew after the match, throwing the ref away when he tries to stop Matt.  Matt ends up yanking out a pretty nice sized chunk of Drew’s hair.

The camera shows Rampage chained to a chair and he asks Ted what he wants with him.  Ted says that it’s not important right now.  Right now, they’re going to the ring.

<COMMERCIAL>

Ted, Virgil, and IRS handcuff Rampage to the ring ropes, and hold him back.  Ted says that he’s doing this because everyone has a price, even him.  Someone said they wanted Ramapge delivered to them on a silver patter, and Ted said to name their price.  So, it was paid, and now Rampage was all theirs.  The person that comes out to claim Rampage would be none other than Rowdy Roddy Piper.  Piper says that at Wrestlemania I, he shut everyone up who kept saying that The A-Team was te hottest show on television, and he silenced the old Mr. T.  Now, he says he has to silence another “Mr. T”, and he’s not going to see The A-Team.  Piper pities the fool who mess with Hot Rod.

However, Dusty Rhodes, Mean Gene, and Murdoch make their way to the ring.  Rampage shoves IRS and Virgil away, and pulls his hand free from the handcuff.  IRS goes for a clothesline on Rhodes, and Rhodes dodges, elbowing him in the head instead.  Virgil and Piper just stand there, looking at Rampage and Rhodes.  Rampage slams Virgil, and Piper leaves the ring.  Gene asks how they did it, and Murdoch says he remembered where he was and that he needed to call Dusty for help.

Voting is open, so you can now choose whether WWE Champion John Cena faces World Heavyweight Champion Jack Swagger, Rey Mysterio, or CM Punk.

<COMMERCIAL>

Next week’s guest host is USA Network’s Original Series Royal Pains Star, Mark Feuerstien, and I’m pretty sure I heard that Big Show is going to be hosting with him!  Josh Matthews shows up with Rey Mysterio, Jack Swagger, and the Straight Edge Society, and asks them all why they should be competing against Cena tonight.  Rey says that in order to get to the top, you have to go after whoever is on top.  Swagger bascially just says that it’ll be Champion vs Champion, and Punk says that he can make Cena a better person.

Brrrrrr LEATHER SHOES!!!

Cena makes his way out to the ring, and Matt Striker lets us know who the pick was for Cena’s opponent tonight.

WWE Champion John Cena vs CM Punk with Straight Edge Society

As soon as the bell rings, Cena goes for the mask, and Punk rolls right out of the ring.  It looks to me like CM Punk met up with the Bellas backstage and totally jacked their ring gear.  Anyway, Punk gets the upperhand when he gets back in and puts Cena in a headlock.  Cena counters with a shoulder block and flips Punk, putting him in a headlock.  Punk reverses, then Cena counters, and goes for the mask again.  Punk rolls out.  When he gets back in, he goes for a lockup, but knees Cena in the gut, followed  by his shoulder.  He flips Cena, drops a dropkick to the back of Cena’s head, and goes for a cover.  Cena kicks out at two.  Punk gets Cena in a submission hold, but Cena powers out and goes for the STF, but Punk grabs the ropes.  Punk misses a clothesline, and Cena Irish Whips him across the ring, hitting a bulldog.  He goes for another move, but Luke Gallows grabs his ankles, sending him to the mat, rolling around.

<COMMERCIAL>

@TKeep123 CM Punk is looking like an Amish Luchador! #WWE #RAW #BWF

We return to Punk holding Cena in a headlock.  Cena counters to a fireman’s carry, but Punk counters it.  Punk goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out at two.  Cena ends up outside the ring, and Serena kicks Cena.  Cena is then kicked by Punk and put back in the ring.  Cena starts to fight back, then goes to Irish Whip Punk, just for Punk to reverse it.  Cena ducks a clothesline, then hits Punk with two shoulder tackles, and a takedown.  Cena pauses as he sees Wade Barrett begin making his way down the ramp.  Cena ignores him for a minute, and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle and lifts Punk up to a fireman’s carry.  But, he drops Punk and tells Barrett to make his move.

Okay, here is about where I got too confused to keep up with the show, unfortunately.

The Season One NXT Rookies appeared from frigging nowhere and started to tear everything apart.  They took apart the ring, the barricades, announce table, beat the hell out of Cena, stripped Justin Roberts, choked him with his own tie, beat the hell out of Jerry Lawler… I don’t know what happened, to be honest.  I think they were spending too much time alone with Sheamus in a room with nothing but black lights and all that fluorescent finally got to their heads…

Anyway, I don’t know what that was all about, and hopefully the WWE will explain it next week!  And with that, I’ll see you next week!

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