Home ▸ RAW ▸ RAW is FLAIR! 2/9/09

Tonight on RAW, Ric Flair confronts Chris Jericho, and we’ve got six man tag team action with John Cena, Rey Mysterio, and Kofi Kingston taking on Kane, Mike Knox, and Jericho.

RAW Results, after the jump!

Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome the 16 time World Champion, and WWE Hall of Famer, “The Nature Boy” Ric Flair!

Ric Flair walks that aisle, stylin’ and profilin’, WOOOOOOOOOOOO!  He enters the ring and gives a strut.  He says he’s missed the fans.  A year ago, he was fighting for his career, knowing he’d have to retire if he lost.  The time came, and at WrestleMania XXIV, he couldn’t have lost to a man he has more respect for than HBK.

He’s cut off by Chris Jericho, saying it’s enough of him wasting valuable airtime getting nostalgic about his career.  He says that Flair came to address comments that Jericho made last week, but he wants Flair to think about the night after WrestleMania.  We see a clip from RAW of Jericho hugging Flair the night after WrestleMania.  Jericho hugged Flair out of respect, but if he knew what Flair would become, he wouldn’t have hugged him, he’d have slapped him.  If Flair would’ve known Jericho would turn into a condacending little punk, insecure with himself.  Flair’s never sold out, and he’ll never wrestle again.  He’s got too much respect for Shawn Michaels and the WWE, but he’s losing more respect for Flair by the minute.  Jericho’s sure Flair has too much respect for the people too.  Flair says he lives and dies for the people.  Jericho doesn’t believe him.  He’s sure that’s why he’ll sign a deal with any promoter that will slap his face on a poster and let him shake hands with these idiots.  Flair’s the problem, he has to be the center of attention.  Flair says he does, because he’s the Nature Boy!  He loves the spotlight.  Sure he’s retired from the ring, but he’ll never retire from the business.  He loves to shake hands with the fans and tell them stories about himself and the rest of the legends.  Flair’s going to live his life how he wants, because he can.  Jericho says that if Flair was an honest man like Jericho, he’d get a lot of people saying it’s not his business – but he’s wrong, because it is Jericho’s business as a locker room leader.  People respect Jericho more than they respect Flair.  He says Flair can’t walk away with any dignity.  That’s the point of “The Wrestler.”  The fans could care less about the legends.  They cheer him now, but they’ll go home, post their pictures on Facebook, and then forget about Flair forever.  Flair’s going to continue down the road that Mickey Rourke’s character went down in “The Wrestler.”  Jericho is advising Flair to tell the fans that he’s better than them.  Flair says no.  Jericho tells him to have it his way.  If we want to see a clown who falls flat on his face for our entertainment, take a look at the clown in the ring.  Go ahead, Flair, do your strut, your Woo, all your tricks.  Flair’s got nobody to blame but himself.  Flair decks Jericho and gives off a WOOOOOOO and his signature strut as Jericho bails.

Later on tonight, Smackdown’s Undertaker takes on Randy Orton.

Recap of Orton’s assault on the McMahons last week.

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Later tonight, six man tag team action with No Way Out implication.  Speaking of tag teams, Beth Phoenix and Jillian Hall are teaming up again, with Santino Marella and Rosa Mendez in their corner.  Next week on RAW, Melina defends her Women’s Championship against Beth Phoenix.  Melina’s teaming with Kelly Kelly again.  This match is getting as old as the Finlay and Mark Henry matches we were seeing on ECW for about 6 months.

Beth Phoenix & Jillian Hall def. Melina & Kelly Kelly

Ugh.  I just don’t care anymore about this match.  This is the third one in the past two months.  Remember when you’d only get matches between big name stars once every three or four months?  I’m not saying we need to bring back the enhancement talent (sorry, Barry Horrowitz), but still, at least give us some variety in the matches.  Rosa Mendez distracted Melina behind the referee’s back, and Beth hit – whatever she calls her version of the Implant Buster, and gets the pin.

WrestleMania Moment: March 29, 1987, Pontiac Silverdome in Detroit Michigan, WrestleMania III set an indoor attendance record that still stands today.  Ricky Steamboat defeated “Macho Man” Randy Savage in what is widely considered the greatest match in ‘Mania history, and Hulk Hogan defeated Andre The Giant, slamming the big man in the process.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

JBL is getting dressed backstage when HBK comes by.  JBL wanted to remind him that it’s an all or nothing match this Sunday.  HBK asks if JBL thought he’d forget.  JBL says that HBK is still his employee, and JBL controls his matches.  So he’s scheduled him a tuneup against The World’s Strongest Man, Mark Henry.  JBL wishes him luck before leaving.

I hear voices in my head…

Legacy make their way out to the stage, Orton with a mic in his hand.  He says that lost in the controversy between himself and the McMahons is the fact that he won the Royal Rumble.  That means he’ll main event WrestleMania, facing either the WWE or World Champion, and the choice is up to him.  While everybody else forgot about it, he hasn’t stopped thinking about it.  He will be champion!  Nobody, nothing can stand in his way, not Vince McMahon, not Shane McMahon, and certainly not Stephanie McMahon.  Unfortunately, Stephanie was scared to death because she thought Orton was going to punt her.  He wasn’t.  He wanted to show Shane what could happen if Orton wanted it to.  Besides, why would he want to hurt Stephanie?  He wants her to be around so he can see the look in her eyes when he takes out another member of her family.  The Undertaker couldn’t stop him at Royal Rumble, and he won’t stop him tonight.  If The Undertaker can’t beat Orton, what kind of chance does Shane McMahon have?  Priceless’ music hit, and they head to the ring for tag team action, NEXT!

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We’re back in Oakland, where Priceless await their opponents, Cryme Tyme.  Homeboy Shopping Network ’09 make their way to the ring and we’re off!

Priceless def. Cryme Tyme

Cryme Tyme are still employed?  The gimmick was entertaining for about five seconds before they got canned the first time.  Another thing is, they want me to watch “Word Up” on WWE.com, but Michael Cole tells me every single week what the word is while Cryme Tyme wrestles on RAW, so why waste my time?  That’s valuable “Dirt Sheet” watching time, kids.  Priceless picks up the win after Cody hits the CrossRhodes reverse DDT on JTG.

Later on, it’s HBK vs. Mark Henry.  Next though, it’s six man tag action with No Way Out implications.

John Cena and a bunch of other people including Tiger Woods shaved at the same time for Gillette Fusion.  Yippie.

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If the Oakland Raiders played football as well as they acted like jackasses in the front row at RAW, they’d probably be unstoppable.  Then again, that goes for most sports teams (i.e. my hometown Buffalo Bills at Armageddon).

Kane makes his way out, followed by Mike Knox, then Chris Jericho.  Rey Mysterio is out first for his team, followed by Kofi Kingston then John Cena, and we’re set for six man tag action.  Not right now.  After these messages now!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Chris Jericho, Kane, & Mike Knox def. Kofi Kingston, Rey Mysterio, & John Cena

Is it tag team night on RAW.  Look, we all know what’s going to happen here.  It’s going to be a decent enough match, clean, with tags.  One team will cut one of their opponents off from his partners, that guy will eventually get a tag, all hell will break loose, everybody will hit everybody else, the two legal guys will be left, and it’ll wind up with Cena pinning Kane.  In case you can’t tell, I don’t really feel like “calling the action” tonight.  In the end, I was wrong.  Jericho caught an incoming Kofi Kingston with a Codebreaker and picked up the win for his team.

After the match, Knox and Kane stare a hole through a celabrating Chris Jericho.

In her office, Stephanie McMahon is on the phone.  She tells whoever she’s talking to that she’s not provoking Randy Orton by showing up and being GM of RAW.  If Orton comes back there, security is not far away.  She’ll be careful, she can handle herself.

HBK is walking.  He’ll be walking to the ring to face Mark Henry – NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

RAW REWIND: HBK was slapped in the face by JBL last week and walked away crying.

Back in real time, HBK is walking toward the ring to face off against another Texan, Silsbee’s own Mark Henry.  Henry comes to the ring with Tony Atlas.  JBL makes his way out, and sits ringside.

Mark Henry def. Shawn Michaels via Disqualification

HBK goes right after Henry before the bell.  The referee separates them, but as soon as the bell rings, HBK’s right back on him.  HBK is all over Henry when JBL throws a chair into the ring.  HBK picks it up, Henry snatches it away, and HBK hits Sweet Chin Music on the chair into Henry’s face, and gets himself DQ

After the match, JBL takes the microphone and reminds HBK that if he loses by DQ, countout or anything else this Sunday at No Way Out, JBL owns his name.  Like Mickey Mouse to Disney, so shall Shawn Michaels be to JBL.  JBL will put HBK’s likeness on everything he owns.  HBK goes to leave, JBL tells him he didn’t dismiss him.  He says that since every decision affects HBK’s family, why doesn’t he bring his wife to No Way Out, so she can see first hand what a beaten, broken old man her husband’s become.  JBL wants to see her when she comes to the realization that HBK has lost his only opportunity to keep his respect in tact.  HBK will lose, and JBL will do what he’s always done his entire life – he will win.  Oh yeah, Shawn, speaking of your wife, JBL thinks there will always be a place in his office for such a beautiful and talented lady.  JBL leaves a frustrated HBK in the ring.

Later tonight, Undertaker takes on Randy Orton.  But up next, CM Punk defends his Intercontinental Championship against William Regal.

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

LAST MONDAY: William Regal pinned CM Punk in a mixed tag match with a knee to the head.

Punk makes his way out first.  William Regal is accompanied by Layla, as per usual, as the announcers ponder whether or not Regal will smile if he wins the IC Championship tonight.

CM Punk def. William Regal to retain the WWE Intercontinental Championship

Yet another match we’ve seen seven billion times by now.  Regal goes for an early win with a knee to the temple, same move he beat Punk with last week, but Punk kicks out.  Punk goes for an early win as well, but Regal battles out of the GTS.  Regal employs a variety of submission holds, suplexes, and strikes.   He runs in for the knee to the head but gets kicked in the face.  Punk nails a GTS with his kneepad pulled down, and pins Regal for the win.

WrestleMania Moment: WrestleMania XIII in Chicago.  Several young Superstars, including The Rock, Steve Austin, and Triple H, appeared at this WrestleMania early in their careers.  The Undertaker defeated Sycho Sid (who allegedly intentionally crapped himself) for the WWF Championship.

Speaking of The Undertaker, he’s taking on Randy Orton later on tonight!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Mickey Rourke won a BAFTA award for Best Actor.  We’re treated to a video of him accepting the award.

So, for the benefit of those with short attention spaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaans: Ric Flair decked Chris Jericho earlier in the night.  Apparently Jericho’s not afraid to defend himself against a girl, but won’t defend himself from The Nature Boy.

We then get a rundown of the No Way Out card, set to a Saliva song that sounds like every Saliva song you’ve ever heard – no offense to Saliva, who still introduce the song “Ladies and Gentlemen” at concerts as “the theme song from WrestleMania 23.”

LAST MONDAY: Randy Orton attacked the McMahons.

NOW: Randy Orton is walking toward the arena.  His match with The Undertaker is NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Randy Orton makes his way to the ring.  You know, the more I think about it, the less sense “making his way to the ring” makes.  What’s he making on his way to the ring?  Shouldn’t it be “on his way to the ring” instead?  I don’t know.  These are the random things I think of when I’m watching Monday Night RAW.  Anyways, The Undertaker comes to the ring, and it takes him two minutes and 27  seconds to get there.

The Undertaker def. Randy Orton by Disqualification

This is another match that could’ve been done at WrestleMania – except for the fact that Orton won the Rumble and Undertaker isn’t Champion.  For the second time in the last 12 or so hours, we’re going to credit Lance Storm with a great idea.  Vince could’ve come back and put Orton in a match against ‘Taker at ‘Mania as punishment – and Orton should go over.  Whoever the first person to put a blemish on the Undertaker’s WrestleMania record is will be a megaheel.  Anyways, this one ends when Rhodes and DiBiase rush out to save Orton from a Tombstone and get him disqualified.

Legacy put the beatdown on the Phenom, and as Orton sets up for the RKO, Shane O Mac comes out after him.  Undertaker drop both members of Priceless with chokeslams as Orton escapes.  McMahon grabs a trash can and sets it up across Ted DiBiase in the corner, climbs to the top on the other side of the ring, and hits the Van Terminator Coast To Coast.  He points up the ramp at Orton as if to say “it’s me and you at the PPV.”  We catch a replay of the events we just witness, and RAW goes off the air with Orton staring down the aisle at Shane McMahon, who is staring back.

My Thoughts: Lot’s o’ filler this week.  It did what it needed to do though – it built towards the completely unnecessary No Way Out PPV this Sunday.  There are some really well told stories going in to the PPV this Sunday, but the Elimination Chamber match for RAW is completely overshadowed by the JBL/HBK match (which could have waited another month for ‘Mania), and the Shane McMahon/ Randy Orton match.  I don’t really care for having a PPV between the Rumble and ‘Mania, I don’t see the point, but I will be around next Monday with coverage of it anyway.

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