Tag Archive: Bam Bam Bigelow

  1. Raw Is After Vengeance 10-24-11

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    Vengeance is in the books. Off the top of my head, it was a really good pay-per-view. If I had spent my money (I saw it in a bar where I do a pre-game show, so I was not charged for it.), I would have been pleased with the purchase. The worst part of the night was our service, but that is not typical, so you take it as it comes. Vengeance had some really good matches. Cena-ADR was a total (good) brawl. Henry-Show was a pretty good match (Even though the ring collapsing will never touch Taz-Bam Bam Bigelow in ECW). Sheamus-Christian, Orton-Rhodes, were pretty good matches for the hype behind them. Even Eve-Beth wasn’t painful.

    So coming next is Survivor Series. Now begins the build-up. They begin to recap the PPV. The ring collapsing was of course the first thing mentioned. And the second was Kevin Nash. Eve Torres had more people talking than Kevin Nash. HHH comes out to the ring likes it’s still 2004 and gets to be the center of attention. Why not? The ring collapsed back then, too. HHH does the same promo he’s done since ’04. He calls out Kevin Nash and is interrupted by the only guy I want to see less, Super Dave Osborne. HHH follows Super Dave up to the ramp and is attacked by Kevin Nash holding a sledgehammer. They did a nice job of selling the sledgehammer. If you get hit with one, your only television appearances for the next two weeks should be in a hospital bed.

    No matter how bad Raw is, it can be as bad as the Adam Sandler in drag movie.

    Cole and Lawler sold the sledgehammer hit very well. They are trying to make these mean something again.

    Our first match is Orton & Sheamus vs. Christian & Rhodes. Sheamus is really catapulting upwards. I think he might replace Kofi as my favorite wrestler in the WWE. These four know each other well in the ring and worked very well together. Sheamus got the pin and looks like he gets Mark Henry next. Good bout for the first match.

    Backstage, Super Dave is talking to Stephanie. This is how bad it is. I would rather see Stephanie on tv than Johnny Ace. John Cena sees Otunga and makes a Carlton Fresh Prince joke. If it didn’t sound scripted, I would forgive him for at least one poop joke.

    Santino got squashed by Dolph Ziggler. After Jack Swagger put him in the Ankle Lock Submission, the Walking Wellness Violation Mason Ryan comes out to his rescue. In case you were curious about what roid rage looks like, go back and watch this segment.

    After the commercial break, we have the younger Gomez Addams in the ring introducing Alberto Del Rio. Alberto Del Rio will be champ for a long time. Then CM Punk’s music hits. Then Super Dave interfered. Punk went over his mic skills. Then he mocked Ace’s “majestic voice” and asked him if he needed a new skateboard. Punk wants a title shot. All he had to do is say is he respected Ace.

    “I respect you, Funk-man.”

    -CM Punk in a deep Brian Pillman-like voice making reference to this

    Punk said that he respected Ace for doing more with less. Ace doesn’t want Punk as champion. 1997 called. They wanted their angle back.

    We got Nattie-Alicia Fox. Alicia actually beat Nattie. That was unpredictable.

    The John Morrison Future Endeavored Tour continued against Wade Barrett. John Morrison will have a nice career in AAA. It was just kind of a formality. I have no emotional investment in any more of Morrison’s matches. I’m just biding time until the next match. At least the Divas match had a surprise.

    Does Vince believe Jim Ross deserves ANY dignity? Michael Cole will quit if he loses the announcer’s challenge. Well, I guess we know who’ll win it.

    Miz & Truth attacked Zack Ryder and then cut a really good promo. After the commercial, we find out it’ll be a handicap match. I still have Walking Dead on DVR that needs to be watched. Hell, I’d rather watch Dirty Soap with my wife than this main event. I paid no attention to this match because the WWE Creative Team didn’t either.

    You want good wrestling? Go here if you’re in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Go here to get a good cross-section of indy wrestling no matter where you are. And no matter who you are or where you are, go here. Cause you’re not getting it here with the WWE.

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  2. The Great Defense of Snooki

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    Yeah, that’s right. While everybody else is claiming the end of the wrestling world as we know it, I’m going to point out why it may not be.  While everybody is calling for the Apocalypse, it just may not be.

    I must begin this with a confession. I like Jersey Shore. [pausing for the jokes about losing my man card] It is an entertaining show. Yeah, make all your jokes, shout your snide remarks and giggle endlessly at my expense. But I’m not alone. Jersey Shore’s rating this past week was 4.7. Jersey Shore was the highest-rated show on Cable. Yes, that is better than WWE’s both hours of Raw. We won’t be seeing that during the “Did You Know…” graphic this week. Right now, Jersey Shore is one of the hottest topics you will find on television. If it was more sought after, it would be winning on Adonis DNA and tiger blood.

    And no figure on Jersey Shore is more iconic than Snooki. Towering over none at 4’9″, she is a bubbly, charismatic, polarizing figure. You wanna get a group of people going? Bring up the subject of Snooki, and ask people what they think of her. Regardless of what this says about our society, Snooki is one of the hottest commodities on television today.

    Yes, the wrestling world has had plenty of celebrity appearances go bad: RoboCop, the cast of Jackass, Pacman Jones. But there have been some really successful ones: The War to Settle the Score, Lawrence Taylor-Bam Bam Bigelow, Mike Tyson & that encounter with Stone Cold (How many times did we see that on ESPN?). Wrestlemania was built around the appearance of Mr. T, who was one of the hottest commodities of his time.

    So here is an opportunity to get an actual star from Jersey Shore (and not some joke who hasn’t lasted either season and is now doing TNA) and capitalize on her star power. This CAN work. They will most likely have a broader audience than usual, because there will be some people who will tune in to see Snooki. As much of an indictment that is on our culture, it’ll create some buzz. When the people tune in, the key is to get them a reason to watch again.

    WWE, this part is for you. You might have people who have never tuned in before. You need to make sure you give an exciting product that makes people tune in again. Also, your biggest show of the year is a matter of weeks away. Make sure you find a way to pimp out Wrestlemania like it’s never been pimped before. Also, I know that you’ve always been a sucker for your “Sportscenter” moment. Make sure you parlay this into an effort to sell the biggest show of the year.

    With this in the right hands, this just might work.

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