Tag Archive: Fan Status

  1. Pintnoir’s Impact Wrestling Review 1/5/12

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    Welcome back. After having help last week from Matt B. Wrestle, I’ve decided to return and review this weeks Impact. The final impact before Genesis TNA’s opening PPV. And I’ll be happy to report I kinda didn’t like it as a lead into Genesis I was basically bored by the events but it could be that I’m an old man by wrestling fan status (27) and feel like I’ve seen it all. Lets begin.

    Roode umpteenth replay of his leader of the selfish generation gimmick plays just to remind people that Roode is a bad man (again.) Steve Borden comes to the ring and calls out Jeff Hardy. This is suppose to again absolve Jeff of his victory road debacle and bring the story full circle since Steve alter ego Sting was his embarrassed opponent. But this is interrupted by Bobby Roode, the aforementioned leader of the selfish generation. Who brings tag alongs Angle and Bully Ray. Roode admonishes Steve Borden for picking favorites and how he should praise Angle for beating up rednecks and Ray for having awesome calves?! Oh and him because he is the face of the company. Then they are interrupted by James Storm and Abyss, who basically talk over the heels which prompts steve to set up a six man tag match. You know because both companies love to compact entertainment into one main event. Have a bias against six man tag matches or random tag matches in general? Yes. Yes I do.

    Oh look its Madison in a bikini and a mole that may or may not be cancerous like her whole persona.

    Face, back whatever it still looks suspect

    Science is still out on that one. She spots Traci at a pool and proceeds to announce that they have a tag match set up for the Knockout titles. This is all before the hazing that takes place when Gail and Madison double team Traci and attempt to drown her. Thank god for Mickie who jumps in for the save. And then we have the Knockouts Tag team match.

    Its basically a brawl which has a fired up Traci vehemently attacking Gail and in some instance Rayne with occasional assists from James. *Sidenote here* So the mystery woman from last week was Madison? Here I was hoping for some new talent. Gail beats Traci with her heel move “Eat Defeat” to retain the titles.

    Random Eric Young segment where he’s interviewed by Wonder Years about whats he up to. He looking for ODB so they can have their match even though they already lost. But whatever.

    The Wild Card Tag Team Tournament. We see the two remaining teams Joe/Magnus and Kaz/AJ go through the pre match backstage segments/interviews. Really this whole tournament was kind of one dimensional. Aside the Magnus return to the ring nothing was special about it. Too predictable with so much interference it took the joy from it. For what should be an intense match turns sour before the opening bell. Kaz who is having secret meetings with Daniels really just ruins and makes an all too predictable out come. Long story short, Kaz leaves in similar fashion to Shannon Moore, leaving AJ stranded to take a whooping aligning himself with Daniels.

    Finally, Kazarian has a storyline. Look at him smile.

    Crimson/Morgan or Blue Streak take on Joe and Magnus at Genesis.

    Oh. Garett Bishoff returns to ref but is told by GM Borden he is a wrestler. And Eric Young invades the KO locker room looking for ODB only to throw Madison inside a locker before fleeing.  Gunner takes on RVD, so since we know who wins lets just skip to the no Flair at ringside that took Steve 3 weeks to institutionalize surprisingly only when RVD is present. Because god forbid he has to take time off. RVD wins with a DQ and a save from D’lo. Al Snow and Simon Diamond. These three guys moved so slow it took 3 weeks of spiked ddt’s for them to make it ringside. Now announced is a Gunner vs RVD match which doesn’t look promising at all. Just saying.

    X division tag match with RANDOM I mean the four participants who will face each other for the X divison title come Genesis. Austin Aries (c) Kid Kash, Jesse Sorenson, and Zema Ion. THree heels and a face its possible right??

    Sorenson wins with the cross roads. Setting up the eventual Austin Aries win come Genesis. And now that I think about it where is the Ultimate X match that should be taking place here?

    Eric Young finds ODB taking pics of dudes and they wrestle then kiss. AAAHH! Cody Deener part deux is on its way.

    Even Charlie Sheen wouldn't come back for this Part Deux

    Blue Streak and Joe and Magnus brawl.

    Main Event time. Six Man tag Match! ———–The heels beat the stuffing out of the faces. Roode has Hardy in the crossface, Angle has Storm in an Ankle lock and Ray is choking out Abyss with a chain. I could go through that match it would of bored me to tears.

    call the story police, please.

    So hopefully until Genesis, THis is Pintnoir fading to black.