I’d like to thank the Bangles …

To the tune of ‘Manic Monday’ by the Bangles, you can follow the song by clicking HERE.

It’s that time already
I was just eating some chocolate ice cream
I’ve been thinking all day
About my column and what should be its theme
But it can’t be late
‘Cause then it’s Thursday and it wont be right
These are the days
I wish that Vinnie had a show every night

It’s just a column on a Wednesday
At least it’s not every day
Then I’d have no fun day
Thank Joe it’s only one day
It’s just a column on a Wednesday

I think I need a miracle
‘Cause all I see on my screen is white
I’m running out of time
and I’ve still got nothing to write
‘Cause it takes me so long
Just to figure out what I’m gonna say
I post a YouTube clip or two
And everything is a-ok

It’s just a column on a Wednesday
At least it’s not every day
Then I’d have no fun day
Thank Joe it’s only one day
It’s just a column on a Wednesday

Why in my mind
Did I choose to make fun of a Bangles song
It’s just too hard
Does it really matter
That it’s hard to change the words
I’ll just write anything down
A giant has a big voice
and Mimes, they don’t make a noise
Time for a ke-bab
and a Hot Cross Bun

It’s just a column on a Wednesday
At least it’s not every day
Then I’d have no fun day
Thank Joe it’s only one day
It’s just a column on a Wednesday

At least it’s not every day
Then I’d have no fun day

It’s just a column on a Wednesday

Wednesday. The only day in the week where there is zero wrestling on your TV. Monday Nights are RAW, Tuesdays have ECW. Thursdays make an iMPACT. Friday nights have SmackDown! Saturday Nights are ROH and Sundays are for Pay-Per-View. Where does that leave Wednesday? Luckily, at BoredWrestlingFan, yours truly has completed your weekly wrestling fix.

WWE Judgment Day

I actually made predictions in last week’s column, if thats what you want to call them. Let’s see if my wishes came true.

Umaga def. CM Punk

I got this one wrong. Infact, judging by the length of this match. This wasnt a 30 minute match was it? It wasnt even a 10 minute match. No, it was more like this …

Christian def. Jack Swagger

Who didnt see this coming a mile away huh? Christian won. Personally, I dont see why Jack Swagger cant win, I mean, he’s been in commercials. At least, I think it’s him, it sure sounds like him. Here, judge for yourself.

John Morrison def. Shelton Benjamin

This shows you just how much means in the scheme of things, that as of last Wednesday, this match was not announced for the Pay Per View. Which means, that this match had at most exactly four days build up. Four Days People! How can you build a PPV match in four days? It’s just like working out if the contractors building the Death Star knew what they were getting into? I’ll let Dante and Randal explain.

A segment involving the Miz, Chavo and Santino

Thats the Miz, Chavo Guerrero and Santino Marella

Rey Mysterio def. Chris Jericho

Well it looks like my dreams didnt come true. Rey Mysterio didnt get Swine Flu nor did he get booted back to Mexico. Perhaps I should’ve gotten JBL to do it. Rather than comment on this match, why not show it to you. I present to you, Rey Mysterio vs Chris Jericho.

Batista def. Randy Orton by DQ (Orton retains WWE Championship)

Randy cheats to win, so Big Dave doesnt win the title. Hooray for Randy, thank you for not letting that useless lug win the title. It’s good to see they might let Randy hold the title for a few months, or at least until this man comes back. However, spoiler note, Randy Orton scheduled to defend the WWE Championship three times during RAW’s tour of Australia and New Zealand in early July. Before you ask, no I’m not going, my birthday is too close to the touring dates (the last day of the tour is the day before my birthday), which means that chances are, Randy isnt losing the title before then.

Wasn’t Batista a Body Builder?

John Cena def. Big Show

First off, did you know John Cena gave driving tips? Secondly, if anyone actually thought that Big Show was going to win at Judgment Day should not be allowed to be a wrestling fan ever again. Thirdly, don’t you pay attention to rhymes? Fourthly and finally, Are we gonna have a shower or what?

Edge def. Jeff Hardy

Edge retains the World Heavyweight Championship, which means for the first time in a long while, all major titles have been retained at the one PPV. Which is good, considering I was at a concert the other night and was surprised to see Jeff Hardy reforming his old band. Here’s a clip.

No TNA this week, I went through a fair bit last week and the only thing that has been added is that Jeff Jarrett is now a part of the Title match at Sacrifice. That’s J-E-Double F J-A-Double R-E-Double T. What is he Sacrificing in order to be in the match? Why ownership of TNA of course. Judging by that, my prediction is, either Angle loses or Foley loses. My guess, Angle loses to Foley.

That’s it for another Wednesday, don’t forget to check out my review of the Vintage Collection over at WorldWrestlingInsanity.com and the sister site of BoredWrestlingFan.com, VinceRussoWatchesHisBeardGrow.com.

I leave you this week, with the softer side of the Doug Anthony All Stars. Here it is!! Tune in next week.