Tag Archive: Jarretts

  1. Impact Review- 12/29/2011 A Special Matt B. Wrestle Review

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    Hi folks this is Matt B. here to go over Impact for Thursday. Why? You say. We’ll tonight features a Knockout Title Match..wait for it…as the Main Event of the show. So I got down and dirty and beat Pintnoir to the punch since he’s busy with family and what not. So not only will we see The Women’s Sufferage Movement move forward to the 21th century, (because well there still behind Chikara when it comes to featuring powerhouse female talent.) JoshiMania anyone. Welcome to Impact Dec. 29th

    We recap with the firing of the Jarretts and the ascension of Madison Rayne as Karen Jarretts successor. Cutting back to the Impact Zone in struts Rayne and her co tag team partner and current Knockout title holder Gail Kim. She quickly calls out Tara and Tessmacher.

    “Lets get this over with before we catch any diseases that you two have.”-Rayne

    “I’ll take the diseases.”-Random fan

    Touche sir, Touche.

    Madison fires TNT for what happened last week (For a peek look at pintnoirs review from last week.) Sting’s music hits and Madison looks to be sweating bullets until out steps Steve Borden. The slightly off kilter alter ego of Sting. With Rayne’s assurance that she has everything under control, Steve chimes in that she has no power.

    “Madison, it ain’t over till I say its over.” -Steve

    “(screeching) “Its over”-Madison Rayne

    Steve proceeds to mock Madison and her screeching ways. And informs Gail Kim that she has a match tonight against Mickie James. Roll the obligatory walk on the ramp from the challenger.

    Steiner and Abyss have a pep talk in the back. Abyss tells Scott that they are partners.

    Wild Card Tag Team Tournament is next. AJ and Kazarian (The Man on the Back of the Milk Carton) vs Steiner and Abyss

    A really well worked match. Especially from Where’s waldo Kazarian who proceeds to hit Abyss with a barrage of back elbow, drop kicks and finishes with a swinging ddt to take the monster down. Eventually all is revealed when Abyss calls in Steiner and Black hole slams him. Making sure to pull Kaz on top for the win. Afterwards Bully Ray comes down to the ring accusing Abyss of being a bully.

    “Your the bully, Abyss” – Bully Ray

    Abyss wants Ray at Genesis in a Monsters Ball match. If Ray wins Abyss will rejoin Immortal no questions asked.

    You have to love Immortal’s recruitment practices. Speaking of Immortal, Ric Flair is backstage with Gunner both are in front of an ambulance. Flair proceeds to sell Gunner as a badass and Gunner quotes himself “killer”

    Best of Three series Zema Ion vs Tony Nese w/ Austin Aries on guest commentary

    Did I forget that its a contract on a pole match. Yes its a contract on a pole match. King of the Mountain, Steel Asylum, and Destination X matches are too confusing for audiences so lets dumb it down to a contract on a pole match? Thank you Vince Russo, Hogan, and Bischoff. That was for Pintnoir.

    This time Zema doesn’t come out with a spray can but a knitted scarf? while Nese comes out looking rather propless again for the second week in a row.

    Maybe when its your turn.

    I wonder who is going to win.

    Zema Ion pulls off the victory after dumping Nese out of the ring onto the railing. Lack of commentary from Aries makes me wonder what he thinks.

    Douglas Williams former  TV Title Holder and two time tag team champion. Now he is jobbing for Gunner who is now a “Killer”. Match is short to prove a point. Gunner pushes referee young Hebner resulting in his disqualifacation. Gunner redoes his greatest hits when he DDT’s Williams whom I assume is going to Ohio Valley Wrestling on the bare concrete.

    Robert Roode and his family comments play out. Roode struts to the ring and calls out his best friend from the tapes. Tracy Kalesky former Lacrosse player, wrestling plant, confronts Roode and says that he doesnt’ recognize his best friend. You know because six years ago when he was part of team (heel) Canada and later Robert Roode, money man with secertary Ms Brooks he was a nice guy. Even when Beer Money first formed they were a heel team. But I digress, he attacks his friend until Jeff Hardy runs out for the rescue.

    ODB and EY have a meeting backstage about strategy. Which should of went something like this, “I leave you in the ring OD and since Spike TV doesn’t allow male on female violence we can just stall until you can kick whoever in the balls like last week.” “Good plan Eric, I love you and that Canadian redbeard”

    But instead Eric says rapid tags to stay fresh while the other team tires out. So what we end up having is a unimpressive match where Samoa Joe looks ready to walk. Magnus attempts at flirting or as I call it sexual harassment which ODB returns in kind. This is before she socks him one. And they start some mock makeout slash wrestling. This of course infuriates Eric who disrobes and wrestles Magnus. After some stilted wrestling Magnus runs in and throws ODB into the ring post that Eric is standing on causing him to ball bust. Joe runs in with the muscle buster for the win.

    So much for Male on Female violence huh Spike.

    Kurt Angle vs RVD-a cautious match turns into a real good set up until you realise it will advance story and Kurt is super kicked leaving RVD disqualified so Rob loses but still looks good and then it cuts to a promo that seemed to be taped sometime later that is played immediatedly after where Kurt and RVD seem disappointed their match ended the way it did. This plays even though Kurt is layed out in the ring.

    On to the Main Event. Jeremy Borash does the announcing. The best part is where Jeremy says. “This is for the Knockouts “Ladies” Championship”

    he couldn't let progress ride.

    Just incase you didn’t know. The man event is fast and furious between Gail Kim and Mickie James. Reversals and top rope manuevers, even the filtering in of crowd noise contrasted with no reaction from crowd. Mickie no sold the noise when she did her “come on” scream to get the crowd back into the match. Then after what appears to almost be a clear finish a women in a goblin mask runs in and does the Rayne drop to Mickie, allowing Gail to pin her for he win.

    Next week Pintnoir will be back but for now I’m Matt B. Wrestle, signing off.

  2. TNA Impact 12-15: The Rise of Hardy and the Exodus of the Jarretts

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    We start with a promo promoting Final Resolution and its outcome.

    AJ Styles comes out for his 5 minute sudden death extension from Final Resolution against Bobby Roode. Because TNA could care less about PPV buys. After the initial 5 we have a second overtime. 30 seconds later we have Bobby Roode retaining after using a single Boston Crab on an already injured limb of Styles.

    Next we the tag tournament that teams various people together. First we have Hernandez and Robbie T taking on Abyss and Scott Steiner. Decent match which ends when Abyss black hole slams Rob Terry and allows Steiner to make the pin.

    Kurt Angle comes out to demand a rematch against James Storm. Calls out Sting who tells him that James said that he has already beaten him and is moving on to the world title picture. Angle vows to go to James hometown and attack whomever for Storm’s attention.

    Tony Nese takes on Xima Ion in a best of three series for a shot at the TNA X division title. I believe the whole purpose of this match is to build up both Nese and Ion as top contenders in the X division. And for that I have no problem with that. Xima executes 3 high impact moves on Nese before finally pinning him and shooting a cocky promo to boot.

    Jesse Neal takes on Gunner in what is I guess an excuse to write Neal off television after going on his twitter complaining about leaving. Message served as Gunner hits a DDT on the exposed concrete floor an assist by Flair sealed Jessie’s fate.

    Jeff Hardy comes to the ring and documents his victories over Jeff and the soreness that followed.Bully Ray cuts him off before reminding him that he will not be a stepping stone for Hardy.

    God… Robbie E and Douglas Williams wrestling Samoa Joe and Magnus (This all before a behind the scenes look at the too measuring each other up.) Entertaining match that really showed how well these two (Magnus and Joe) mesh. A muscle buster on Williams for the win.

    EY (Eric Young) finds out that ODB is his mystery partner.

    Devon calls out the Pope who comes to the ring with Devon’s kids. After a heated exchange Pope kicks Devon in the balls from behind. Terrence and Terrell join in holding their father as the Pope slaps on him.

    Traci comes out dressed to stress that she is a wrestler against the Killer Queen Madison Rayne.Short like a divas match ending in the weakness kick to the head I’ve seen.

    Sting calls out both Jarretts. After earlier encounters decides to fire them both.

    Roode comes to the ring to specially announce while Bully Ray wrestles Jeff Hardy (who is now the #1 contender for the TNA title belt. Okay. Bully Ray is a worker and this match ends after 2 twists of fate. Later on Ray distracts Hardy in the ring and puts him through a table. Sting emerges and is beaten down.

    End Impact.

    Final Observation: Better than the last few weeks and Impact is slowly improving and the best part I haven’t seen Hogan since the Thursday after BFG. So here is to continuity and less Russo style matches. Since you know he is still writing the show while Pritchard oversees.

  3. Pintnoir’s Impact Review 9-29

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    Here I am to take over the Impact Wrestling review. Boy do I have my work cut out for me. No Barkley or Daffney to assist.

    Sorry Daff, but the drunk tank you will stay

    We open on Impact and the continuing story of Bobby Roode’s rise to the top. Kurt Angle and Roode exchange words. Is it me or do I see a swerve coming with this whole Roode as champion pursuit?

    I know. I know I will regret this later.

    We now have the 5-man ladder match for the number one contenders match against Austin Aries for the X division gold. After a somewhat cluttered affair, where Aladdin (Kendrick) in all his Disney glory and steals a victory out from under Kid Kash.

    Go Make the street rat proud, Kendrick

    Kaz and Tracy get called out to the ring by The Jarretts, where JJ badmouths Kaz about leaving the company multiple times and how Jarrett kept taking him back despite his flip flopping. He then targets his venom on Ms Brooks for being disrespectful to his wife.  Calling her a “10 cent whore” which causes Kaz to punch Jeff. Soon security or the retired wrestlers brigade come out to separate them. It all comes to a head when Gunner comes out and F5’s Kaz. (Where’s Fourtune?)

    She slept with the owner of the company,

    Ink Inc comes out and gets jumped by Mexican America before a singles match between Hernandez and Jesse Neal could take place. After a swift beating and two big splashes by SuperMex, The Sitas spray paint NWO style on there backs the groups initials.

    Promo Flair argues with Hogan about his announcement and tells him not to do it. (Why again, would Flair care?) Next Promo is the pre match hype for Tara vs Madison for the Queen’s Qualifier’s Match. The winner taking on Velvet, Mickie and Knockout Champion Winter for the title.  Crimson returns.

    Knockouts Queen’s Qualifier Match, Madison Rayne comes out in camo wrestling gear and Tara follows with one half of the now pointless tag belts. “Accessories anyone?” What starts out to be a very promising match….sorry I couldn’t keep a straight face. Soon turns to farce when Earl Hebner gets involve and starts choosing sides. Madison uses her charms to get Earl to make calls on her behalf which leads to an eventual reveal and her luck turns for the worse only for her to win with

    She "slept" with a higher up for her old position, So tell me who is the better hoe?

    her feet on the ropes sealing Tara’s fate as her bitch.

    Even though she won't win they still show that she is an asset, and not a hinderance

    Christopher Daniels brags about his victory over Styles.

    Crimson comes out and calls out Joe. After some back in forth in which Joe calls Crimson his “bitch” a fight ensues which leads to Crimson to be put in the figure four leglock while still suffering from a fractured ankle. But don’t worry Morgan shows to save the day. After a quick clearing of the ring we have the two big men stare each other down until Morgan gives Crimson a friendly man pat on the chest.

    Next we have two underrated superstars Dinero versus Anderson. Let us make it quick. Devon’s kids interfere which causes Devon to come out. While that whole mess is going on we have Anderson in the ring at which point Ray hits him with the Singapore cane which Pope slyly picks up the victory.

    Sappy Roode promo in which I get early vibes of a wrestler’s version of Rocky. Roode makes the usual promises of training and going into BFG and winning the world title.

    Will he have what it takes to beat Apollo Angle for the World Title?

    Main Event: AJ Styles versus Bobby Roode. A really good match leading to Roode winning with a cross-face.

    Hogan comes out to announce his retirement. Or more correctly tease it for next week. Good way to try to boost ratings with a fake RETIREMENT promo. Sting listens back stage calling Hogan a academy award winning actor, Sting closes the show promising to be in Knoxville, Tennessee for the announcement.

    You know your announcement is on thin ice when even the Joker calls you on it.

    So that is all for Impact for this week. See you next week when we witness a Knoxville audience.

  4. Sacrifice or the three hour TNA Impact show

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    No disrespect to the fans with the title. I’m a fan myself but this show with all this innuendo of changes lacked any. The ring and outside arena still had TNA posted everywhere with a hue of blue and added rows of seats which another reviewer on TNAsylum pointed out. Was that the change? I doubt it. But here’s to Thursday on finding out.  Well lets get into what TNA Impact Wrestling is all about. Impact Wrestling presents Sacrifice.

    Mexican America vs Ink Inc.

    I wasn’t expecting much from this match. I mean Anarquia has shown a total disregard to impress and Hernandez just doesn’t seem to care anymore. But then you have Jesse Neal and his infectious energy makes me smile. Oh and Shannon Moore and his book make me shake my head.  But then seeing as how Moore had one of the best spots of the evening. Sailing off the ring onto Hernandez with a moonsault. The match was sub par besides with predictable interference by Rosita and Sarita. And a botched over the top rope clothesline by Moore on Anarquia. Shockingly due to a miscommunication involving Moore attempting to hit Rosita and Neal objecting.  Hernandez was able to hit his modified border toss on Neal giving the win to Mex America.  Why was I shocked? Ink Inc is the number one contender for the tag titles  leading into Slammiversary. I’m adamant that Christina Von Eerie should be there as well but that is probably wishful thinking. So naturally, Ink Inc getting the win would make them look strong going in.  But we still have 3 weeks to make amends.

    Hopefully with it now being iMPACT Wrestling we can stop having Promos in our PPV’s. We get one here as Jeff and Karen come out to announce that they can not compete in the mixed tag match. Foley comes out again the announcement “wrestling matters” is uttered. He tells the Jarretts that the next time they bring X rays make sure it doesn’t belong to a 6’6 African American male. Karen shrieks throws off boot in a temper tantrum leading to Mick exiting. Match on. The crowd is amp to have Chyna.

    Brian Kendrick…shoots a promo on the X Division. I wish I knew what he was saying since he is all mystical and what not. All I caught was the word molested. I don’t now in what context. But it was said. To sum up he just promises to show how important the X division is.

    Brian Kendrick vs Robbie E w/ Cookie.

    Robbie comes out as Cookie walks out messing with he phone/camera? Anyway the crowd seems to be nonchalant. Mr. Gym Tan Wrestling, fist pumps for Cookie while she takes a picture. Again the crowd could care less. Kendrick steps out in his white robe to a good crowd pop. Kendrick 1, Robbie 0. Once in he puts on his gimmick meditating dead center in the ring. Cookie, trying to win a screeching contest against Karen shouts that “you’re a freak!” As Robbie holds her back. Exit Cookie. And we have Kendrick alive and booting E in the face. Kendrick 2, Robbie 0. Then the junior banshee interferes. Distracted Robbie takes control beating Kendrick ragged even getting him outside of the ring. Where Cook’s proceeds to choke him with her boot. Robbie setting up for his signature neck-breaker (god forbid I have no idea what’s its called. And I refuse to call it “Rude Awakening” in fear that Rick would haunt me) Reversed. Kendrick beats Rob with a dropkick into a pin. Huh?! I knew he sucked but really. Kendrick acts all crazy holding Earl Hebner’s hand. He even weirds out Rob when he tries to shake his hand. Your winner: Kendrick.

    Promo time again folks. But this time its hot cougarish Tara. Trust me I’ve seen this woman without make-up Vickie has nothing on her. Tara’s unhappy with Madison. The bossiness and in general being a lackey. Then Madison appears to remind Tara about how she has a job because of her. Folks I won’t lie when she came on all that kept going through my mind was “Why is she here?” “She should of stayed in a shimmer tag team” and my favorite thought “God, please severe her vocal cords. please I’ll go to church,eventually”. Time for the match.

    Mickie James (c) vs Madison Rayne (With Tara’s freedom on the line)

    Here comes the Queen Bee (seriously she has a sash with the title) and the gaudiest oversized crown I’ve ever seen. That better be from the dollar general. In full royal mode, the crowd is dead. Canned heat where are you? In the words of another TNA watcher, The Rayne Experiment has failed. No one and I do mean no one cared when she came out. Then Mickie came out. The roof exploded. She could do no wrong. I seriously believe that she could of killed a puppy and folks would still cheer for her. Lets get ready to… Tara’s theme music hits. The crowd breaks into further excitement. Again the Rayne Experiment elicits no response. A faceoff between Rayne and Tara distracts long enough for Mickie to get on the offensive. Tara seems conflicted. Should she hit Mickie. Only a minute in and I’m already sensing an overbook coming on.

    To break it down simply this match is a TNA haters dream. Overbooking. check. horrible in ring competitor. check. A last minute reintroduction of the loaded glove. check. Tara makes the save for Mickie after 2!! Ref bumps. Tara finally makes the decision to cold cock Rayne with the loaded glove letting Mickie get the 3count. Crap match over.

    Sorry about that but I was a big fan of the Knock out division. In 2009. This was a bad match indeed. But it will get better in the future, right? No.  Chances are we will see Velvet Sky vs Mickie for the title. At least she’s over?!

    Fortune promo. Line remembered. Kaz- Max Buck you wouldn’t be a star even if thrown by a ninja.  Or something to that effect. Other smack talk by Beer Money and AJ. Next.

    Max Buck vs Kazarian(c)

    Good mat wrestling. (I swore when this was going on someone yelled “boring”) Buck plays the egotistical heel to perfection. Slapping and name calling. Some really cool spots with a over the ropes leg drop. Buck reversed 3 fade to blacks by Kaz. Kaz follows up with a powerbomb to the outside. Buck comes in with a top rope cutter and a 450 degree splash for a two count. Kaz goes old school (shout out to Allison Danger) and beats Buck with a shining wizard. Good. Now if only it was hyped.

    Promo. A 6’6 360lb homeless man talks about pain and breaking a undefeated streak. Then I realize that its Abyss. Next up its TNA’s John Cena taking on Crimson.

    With Crimson’s imaginary 5 month winning streak on the line (I now I’m being harsh but times have changed from Samoa Joe) he takes on Abyss strong only slowing down when he spears a turnbuckle. After that the Cena of TNA controls the majority of the match. Crimson resumes control with one double clothesline and a seven count. Abyss reverses with a chokeslam. then comes Janice. Crimson spears Abyss, Abyss loses Janice. Crimson goes to the well once too often and is big booted. Abyss pulls out a Vader Bomb from the corner. 2 count. Crimson hits Cena with the Red Sky Powerbomb (D’lo Brown’s Sky High) keeping his streak intact. After some posturing Abyss goes back to lick his wounds. Now please can we have Joe vs Crimson now?

    Promo. Its like deja vu.  No. Its a vignette. Beer Money vs Hardy/Harris

    I’ll keep it short. Harris plays a heel and won’t fight Storm one on one. He’ll only sneak attack. So no big showdown between the two. Which would of made sense. Remember 2006 when the team of AMW split? Storm was the one who attacked Harris. Almost taking out an eye. Leading to that hilarious blindfold match. Well now its Harris’ turn to play heel as he and Matt lose after Beer Money hits Harris with the AMW finisher Death Sentence. Mind Games no avail. Next.

    Oh its Bully Ray being interviewed by Jeremy Borash. And he is being a bully threatening to beat on Borash and making lewd comments about AJ’s wife. I hope she isn’t watching. So we will see Ray vs Styles? Nope.

    Dreamer vs Styles

    Lets keep it real short. Ray interferes in this No DQ bout this sets Styles up for a piledriver on a table. Dreamer wins. Next.

    Another vignette. Not complaining as long as its not a promo.

    The Jarret’s vs Angle/Chyna

    Kurt is an undiscovered comedian. His smirk during the entire match was classic. It brought back memories of the axe wielding incident at the wedding. Chyna is over big time. Fans are chanting for her to kick Karen’s butt. After a good back and forth between Jarret and Angle, Chyna is finally tagged in. The fans erupt. false alarm. Jarret stays in the ring and continues the fight with Kurt. Angle goes for his exploding triple Germans then an Angle slam. 2count. Chyna comes in and body slams then vertical suplexe’s Jarret. Eventually chasing Karen back into the ring Chyna splashes Karen in the corner. Karen dazed is hit with the double under hook DDT. (pedigree for wwe fans). Chyna locks in the ankle lock followed by Kurt on Jarret. Karen taps. Angle/Chyna victorious.

    Main Event Vignette.-Then Anderson comes out to blog and commentate.

    RVD vs Sting

    The match is decent. Rob shows off. Sting pulls out some moves. They fight in the crowd. RVD pulls an impressive cross body onto Sting from the second stands. Sting blocks Rolling Thunder. A Stinger Splash is countered by a spin kick. One botched deathdrop then a rinse and repeat Deathdrop closes the match with the win for Sting. Afterwards Anderson has a stare down with Sting. Slammiversary IX promo

    And that is the end of Sacrifice. Wasn’t great but I didn’t pay for it so decent. Here’s hoping for the iMPACT arena changes come Thursday.