bWf Halloween Party 2014
By JT · · Leave a CommentI woke up with a massive headache from the bWf Halloween party, and can’t remember exactly what happened… but this is what I can remember:
I enter ThinkSoJoe’s apartment and meet him and Jorge. The house band is Chris and the Cooley’s fronted by none other than That Damn Double C himself. They’re playing Toto’s “Africa.”
JT- Hey guys what’s up! Who are you guys dressed up as?
Joe- Well, I’m the lead singer of 2007 indie sensation band, ThinkSoBrain!
Jorge- I’m the bass player from ThinkSoBrain. Who are you JT?
JT- I’m…..
Just then Lee Meuller bursts in the door and starts hand people CD’s.
Lee- Hey everybody! Look what I have. You get a CD! You get a CD! You get a CD!
Jorge- What the fuck are you doing here? You weren’t invited.
Lee- I’m crashing the party and giving away Lost Elysium CD’S. It’s was the book says!
Jorge- Fuck the book and what it says! I only take advice from the Sheik!
JT Sheik- And the Sheik says, “Fuck the Lee and the Lost Elysium”. If he show his face around the Jorge, then the Jorge put the Lee in the camel clutch, break his back make him humble.
Lee- But?????????
Jorge- You heard what he said.
Lee- NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Jorge puts Lee in the Camel Clutch, and just like that, we hear “Snap!”
Jorge- Well that was easy. Consider him humbled.
JT McMichael- M-O-O-N that spells humbled.
Jorge- Oh no! Not another JT impersonation.
JT McMichael- I was a commentator for WCW. I was abysmal. I made Michael Cole look like Jim Ross. M-O-O-N that spells Jim Ross!
Joe- Then you were rewarded by becoming a Horseman.
JT McMichael- M-O-O-N, that spells Horsemen.
Gee & Mark the walk past Lee.
Gee- I know now not to mess with Jorge.
JT- What’s up guys? What are you dressed as?
Gee- I’m Alex Wright “Das Wonderkind” look at me dance!
Gee starts dancing.
JT- You can’t dance.
Joe- Can’t walk.
Gee- The only thing about me is the way I walk!
Jorge – Oh no a Genesis reference. Is there a TNA PPV this weekend, Mark?
Mark- No, we just had to get the reference in.
Joe- Who are you Mark?
Mark- I’m an Murican! ‘MERICA!!!!!!!!!!
JT Hogan- I invented America Brother! I also invented Halloween, Dude!
Mark- In ‘MERICA we eat the freedom fries with the freedom toast in the freedom quarter in New Orleans while getting freedom kisses from the ladies. ‘MERICA FUCK YEAH!
David Fuller- What’s up guys?
Joe- David, how are you? So glad you could make it! Scary mummy costume.
David Fuller – Actually I’m Yeti. #HalloweenHavoc95
JTGee- Hey you copied me, buddy. I’m Ninja Yeti from World War 3!
Joe- The one who pulled a “Gail Kim” and eliminated himself?
JTGee- You are correct, buddy. Greatest Yeti ever!
Mavenfan- Speaking of lame gimmicks…
Jorge- Mavenfan you made it, but your not dressed as Maven? And why is Laura here? Aren’t you two the same person?
Laura- The JT rule apples to me too. If JT and all his personalities can all be here, mine can too.
Mavenfan- Correct. For those wondering, I am dressed as Knux, the second greatest wrestler ever!!!!
Y2JT- EVERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Laura- I my friends am Madusa. See.
Laura then picks up a garbage can and drops the Knockouts title in it.
Gee- But that’s the Knockouts’ Title, not the WWF Women’s Title.
Laura- I know. But with my second kid on the way, i had to limit my expenses and this was 99.5% off on the TNA website.
JT Hogan – I invented titles!
Chris from Bookertees(dressed as Vince Russo)- I invented pole matches!
JT Hogan- I invented poles!
Triple JT- I buried them!
Mark- ‘MERICA!!!!!!
JT McMichael- M-O-O-N that spells pole match!
Drowgoddess- Huzzah!!!!!!!!!!!! I have returned only to find a bunch of lame Nitro references from 95-96!
JT- I’ve been watching a lot of that lately.
Mark- Only 9.99 a month in ‘MERICA!!!!!!!
JTGEE- But not in Canada. WWE hates Canada!
Cassidy- WOOOOOOO! The Nature Boy has entered the building. I am the 13 time world champion! This here is my chosen one, Jeff Jarrett!
Justin Ruff- Ain’t I great.
Cassidy & Justin strut off.
Drowgoddess- but Jarrett didn’t do the ain’t I great gimmick in WCW?
JT – I know but I ran out of ideas and didn’t want to Justin to be here without anything to say.
Gary Barnidge comes running in with a camera in hand.
Joe- Gary what are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be here for another month. Why do you have a camera?
Gary- I’m a Nitro cameraman. Here hold these tapes, but don’t watch them, they’re Bills’ practice… err… I mean bootleg copies of the uncut Halloween movies.
Joe- Uh… OK, sure. By the way JT Hogan who are you and what’s up with the face-paint?
JT Hogan – I’m the ultimate creation of mine, The Crow Sting!
JT McMichael- I’m a football player, Walter Payton. M-O-O-N that spells Refrigerator!
He starts doing the Ickey Shuffle.
Gee – Why does his jersey say McMahon on the back of it?
Jorge- That’s the quarterback he played with along with Walter Payton and Refrigerator Perry. Why the Ickey Shuffle, I don’t know. Probably because of the commercials with Ickey Woods in them.
Joe- Someone needs to tell him that he’s wearing a Jim McMahon jersey.
JT- Let’s leave him. He’s happy.
JT Hogan – I wrote that song way back in the 70s while playing bass for genesis brother!
Mark- In MERICA we call that “diabetus.”
Mavenfan- That doesn’t make any sense.
Adrian from Bookertees – Neither does anything going on in this party.
Drowgoddess- It is from JT’s brain. Who knows what he’s been drinking or smoking to come up with this?
We then go to Gary who is face to face with JT McMichael.
JT McMichael – You need yo go back to the kitty kat leagues back in Cleveland.
Mark (in normal voice)- HELLO CLEVELAND!!!!!!!!!!
JT McMichael – I played for the greatest Superbowl team of all time even though that statement was irrelevant when i first made it back in 1995. But in my head it’s still 1987. M-O-O-N that spells 1987.
Gary- Joe where did you find this guy?
Joe- it’s one of JT’s personalities. We try to keep them away when you are around but this one got out.
JT Hogan- I invented getting out!
Jorge- Oh no.
JT McMahon- Did somebody call me?
Gee- No, you’re not in this episode.
JT McMahon- Then you’re all fired!
Jorge- We need to do something. I think JT is having a mental breakdown.
JT Orton- I……..
Joe’s costume suddenly morphs and his costume is now D.D.P.
Joe – I’ve got this! BANG!!!!!
Joe hits the Diamond Cutter on JT before anymore characters come out. And that’s the last thing I remember before waking up in my own bed in nothing but my underwear so I done even remember who I went as. No I wonder if it all actually happened or was just a dream? If it was real damn that was a really long version of Africa.
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