Here’s another edition of Impact Wrestling. Where tonight cowardly heels return, Garrett Bischoff shows his skills and Karen continues to screech her way onto my television screens. Lets take a look.

Back in Georgia.

Roode comes out cuts promo on crowd and on James Storm. Taking his opportunity and becoming world champion. James Storm is seen in the back trying to fight back security eventually making to the ring which causes Roode to take off. As Roode takes a heel-like run up the ramp the Stinger shows up. Steve Borden declares that there will be a world title rematch tonight. Roode looks worried.

Segment of Ronnie and Eric Young walking into the building with each carrying a belt.

side-note: Why was there a WWE commercial being played during Impact? Come on Spike get it together. And for their PPV no less.

Another segment with Dixie Carter walking with Bellator founder,

Bjorn Rebney

Back to Impact we have a Crimson/Matt Morgan promo. Looks to be decent until the match starts with Crimson versus Pope D’angelo Dinero. The crowd has little love for Crimson and a lot of love for the Pope, who has been booked into the ground these past months. (That’s what I love about a live crowd similar to Philly they are not behind Crimson but Pope is cheered) I sense a Cena-like response for him in his future.

Anyways Pope puts up some good offense hitting a devastating DDT and following it up with a fist drop and a 2nd rope fist drop. After whooping the Red one lil brother he takes to the rope again to meet the Red Sky (Down Low) Crimson for the win. The crowd did not look happy.

Gunner takes about Garrett showing respect and how he’ll learn it.

We’re back and Gunner comes out with Eric Bischoff & Ric Flair, my spider sense is detecting a DQ. Next Garrett comes down to the ring in Wife beater and Jeans no music. What begins slow with Gunner talking to Bischoff/Flair causes the crowd to jeer leading to the former security guard to take a couple of arm drags and eventually a front slam. Gunner who rolls out of the ring confused looks on as Flair runs in as Garrett flees and the match is declared a Disqualification. (I’m psychic)

I agree Spidey

So we have a backstage comedy segment with a doorman not letting Robbie and Rob Terry into see Ronnie from the Jersey Shore. Eric Young pops his head out asking if he wants a t-shirts. Eventually Ronnie comes out and a comedy spot ensues with Robbie jumping up on Big Rob in piggy back fashion. Elsewhere James Storm is found bloody in the back. He seems unresponsive.

Its time for X-division action as….. Oh my God! Little Elian Gonzalez isn’t dead.

Your guess is as good as mine

Oh wait that is Xima Ion who I almost forgot was in the division along with Nese. This could be good. Jesse Sorenson comes out for wrestle and I think maybe a tag match against Kash and Aries? No singles match so my mind goes to interference or Ion is showing how tough Sorenson is. The latter happens, better than interference. But the match is good albeit short. After missing is top rope finisher, Sorenson hit a cross roads maneuver for the win. Kash comes out sarcastically congratulating him and tells him to sign a contract for a match against Aries for the X division title. After he signs Kash clarifies that it will be a 3 way match. Kash bashes Sorenson’s mother before getting punched. Aries runs out for the double team.

Oh god not a Knockouts segment/match involving Karen and her Posse. As all the women in the back screech back and forth with the occasional loud pitched screech at Traci for causing the title to be on Velvets waist. I blame Traci too.

A knockout tag team title match with Mickie James/Velvet Sky. When I see Gail and Mickie in the same ring I think back to Botchamania.the ending is classic

Velvet takes on Rayne first and all that goes through my mind is “Bathroom Break Eminent!” Sirens blaring everywhere. After a cluster buck in which the crowd seems to care less. Which is sad because two years ago they would be some kind of response. it mercifully ends when Gail boots to the chin Velvet for the win. (special note even Earl Hebner wasn’t interested when he made the count from outside the ring)

Next its Jersey Shore vs Jersey Shore gimmick revisited.

When Robbie E and Rob Terry come out all that comes to mind is bad images of gay porn. You know who’s the power bottom. EY  and Ronnie come out, with Eric doing his best Grizzly Redwood impression. Ronnie pins Robbie and Young ends up in a leopard print undies. And the gay porn images persist.

This is to make up for last week, because I'm anything but Biased

Back in the commissary, 3 punks eat until the Barrio 4 walk in stealing peoples lunches. Fight breaks out with factions??? leading into of course Turning Point. I like Pritchard’s use of minimalism when it comes to who is on the program when it pertains to PPV’s. Personally I would rather see a Sarita versus Toxxin match instead with the Knockout title on the line, but I dream too much like MLK.dream on

The founder of Bellator comes out on commentary and commences to talk up the product similar to an infomercial while  Christopher Daniels and AJ Styles finish their feud before there respective new feuds come Sunday. Good solid match with Daniels going for a screwdriver. Rob comes out and steals it away, leading to AJ finishing Daniels with a Stylez Clash.Oh and “Thanks for the Bellator moment during it”

Six man Tag match with the Founder, a Bully and Steiner Brother taking on a reformed addict, an asshole and mystery????, after commercial break we have an answer. Its the monster Abyss. After a decent match Abyss hit Steiner with a black hole slam for the win.

Roode comes out for the main event. Commercial break. We’re back as James Storm’s music plays. No one shows. Theme song comes again. Slowly Storm comes out still covered in blood. He rushes the ring and puts the hurt to Roode before collapsing. After chants from the crowd to “Get up Cowboy”  The Doctor comes out to get him to the back. Roode offers to assist. When he finds out that the match wasn’t ended he rolls up Storm for the three before Fortune hits the ring. Sting walks past Roode into the ring. AJ gets a microphone and challenges Roode at Turning Point. Sting makes it official.

Styles is wrestlng bum ankle be damned





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