What’s up! It’s Rizzle fo’ shizzle dizzle! Whatever that means. Snoop Doggy Dogg is your host (does he still call himself that, or is it just Snoop Dogg now? In which case, does that mean he can’t perform the song “What’s My Name?” anymore, since it says his name is Snoop Doggy Dogg?), and word on the street is, there’s a former WWE Intercontinental Champion in the hizzle looking to shut up the United States Champion, the Miz. All this and commentary from the Twitterverse, tonight!
Justin Roberts plugs a bunch of the stuff Snoop Dogg’s done over the year, and the guest host shows up in a pink Cadillac with spinners. He’s here with The Bella Twins and Eve. He’s honored to be hosting the RAW, and that RAW will embarrass SmackDown on Sunday. Snoop’s got John Cena facing Triple H, in what may be his last RAW match, but to make things fair, Orton is in action too – against Ted DiBiase. Chris Jericho will take on Shawn Michaels. Now, are you ready? Then make some noise for Degeneration X!
From Twitter: @xanetrain Y2J vs HBK and Orton vs Dibiasi. Nice Raw card
Triple H says that when Snoop is around, white guys have to badly try to talk like him. Shawn Michaels says that DX is in the hizzle for shizzle. Triple H does the tired old joke about Snoop using an umbrella for the drizzle. Anyways, this Sunday, DX captains Team RAW against Team SmackDown. Chris Jericho, who HBK and HHH have both beaten at separate WrestleManias. Then there’s Kane, who’s ex girlfriend was boring and kinda stiff, according to Triple H. Then there’s Cryme Tyme, who scalp tickets in the parking lot at each SmackDown show, and there’s that guy who introduces himself to everybody. Whoever he is. Triple H has no idea who the other guys are and wonders if they won a guess the number of jelly beans in the jar contest. HBK says Drew McIntyre is supposed to be a big star someday. He has no idea who the last guy is. Triple H says he parked his car last week. HBK says he’s a very tough guy. Because he sleeps with Vickie Guerrero. Triple H says that they’ve put together a team that can beat them with no problem – Team RAW! The rest of the RAW team make their way out to the ring.
From Twitter: @steverechtman This would have been great if they were burying WCW, not their fellow Superstars on Smackdown. Bad writing, Stephanie. #WWE #Raw
HBK puts over the entire team – except for Cody Rhodes, who is upset about it. Triple H says that HBK was getting to it. Rhodes says if it was based on talent, he’d be the team captain and everybody knows it. He says he might not tag anybody in, he might just beat SmackDown all by himself. Big Show says that he doesn’t care if Cody insults DX, but he will respect The Big Show. If Show thinks Rhodes will let the team down, he’ll take him out himself. And that goes for each and every one of them. Mark Henry wants to know if that’s a threat. Show asks “what if it is?” Henry says if it is, they’re definitely going to have a problem. Swagger steps in and says he’s miles ahead of everybody athletically. He says to stick to the team’s strengths and let a two time All American wrestler handle things. Kingston says this is what SmackDown wanted, and that they all need to be on the same page. Triple H says he has a problem. Isn’t Kofi supposed to be Jamaican? Where’s his accent? HBK says they’ve got a 5 on 5 tag team match booked for tonight, and if any of Team RAW loses, the person who beat them will take their place. And that match is later tonight. Ah, what the heck. It’s NOW!
MVP, Evan Bourne, Primo, Chavo, and Chris Masters are the opponents.
@leecarter77 Triple H, Jamaican me crazy! Hahaha! #wwe #raw #truekofi
Big Show, Jack Swagger, Mark Henry, Kofi Kingston, & Cody Rhodes def. MVP, Evan Bourne, Primo, Chavo Guerrero, & Chris Masters
Jack Swagger picked up the victory for his team, stealing Cody Rhodes’ thunder in the process.
After the match, Team RAW attack each other, with The Big Show standing tall after the brawl.
Josh Matthews wants to know if Ted DiBiase pinning Randy Orton has strained their relationship. DiBiase says that Orton hasn’t returned his phone calls. Orton shows up and wants to know what about Ted betraying him doesn’t he understand. DiBiase asks if Orton would have done the same thing if he were DiBiase. Orton says if he were DiBiase, he wouldn’t fight back in their match coming up to finally show him the respect he deserves. If DiBiase decides to take advantage of another opportunity, he’ll regret it the rest of his life. It’s his choice.
@nangbaby #wwe #raw Will Randy Orton make up with his boyfriend on national TV?
@x_tialicia lmao my mom just called about #raw asking “who were those men wearing all that green?! they look like Village People.” …oh mom. #WWE
WrestleMania 26 tickets go on sale in 19 Days!
Ted DiBiase is already in the ring and he looks upset about the interaction he had with Orton just before the break. The WWE Champion makes his way to the ring, and we’re set for action.
Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase
Orton boots DiBiase in the midsection and waits for retaliation – and gets none. Orton takes another shot, and again, DiBiase just takes it. Another shot, and DiBiase seems to be getting angry as Orton tells him not to even think about it. Another shot, and another. Orton asks if DiBiase wants to hit him, then stomps on DiBiase again. DiBiase gets up and gets in Orton’s face. Orton shoves him away, but he comes right back. Orton dares DiBiase to touch him, then shoves him away again. He does this a few more times before DiBiase shoves him back. Orton looks up at DiBiase and slowly returns to his feet. Face to face again, DiBiase won’t look Orton in the eye. Orton forces him to, and then drops him with the RKO for the victory.
@xsmootx #RAW Ted looks like he just ate at all you can eat taco bar and has to take a really bad shit.
@rdank1029 Wow, that DiBiase/Orton match, while not much of a match, was fucking exciting. I can’t wait for the eventual Teddy face turn. @WWE #RAW
This past week, WWE lost a family member, the late, great, Captain Lou Albano.
Video package: Captain Lou Albano.
We’re treated to a sneak preview of Snoop Dogg’s new video. Hornswoggle comes into Snoop’s office, and Chavo comes in and demands respect. Jillian comes in and demands a Diva’s Title match tonight. She sings Gin and Juice. Santino comes in dressed like Charlie Brown. Snoop kicks all three of them out of his office. Snoop says it’s time to light one up. We get a Technical Difficulties screen with Michael Cole and Hornswoggle. We come back and Snoop says nothing relaxes him like his own personal stash – of scented candles. Santino comes in and says “Good Grief!”
Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels is still to come tonight, and John Cena will be facing Triple H, NEXT!
@DCsPeoplesChamp Santino + Snoop = #epicwin #bwf
@WrestlingUpdate RAW: Santino (dressed as Charlie Brown) “Snoopy tha Dawg.. I dressed as your ol’ friend Charlie Brown” #wwe #raw
@cmpg I hope next week guest host is Willie Nelson #WWE #RAW (since I’ll be there, so do I!)
The other rapper on tonight’s show, John Cena, makes his way out to the ring for what could possibly be his last match on RAW.
@@wwefanmike: I say Cena loses at Bragging Rights so he has a kayfabe reason to go back to FCW to learn to sell moves. #WWE #RAW
The Game makes his way out, and it’s actually kind of refreshing to hear “The Game” instead of the DX theme for once.
@ExtremeRKO Triple H better not let this match end up like Wrestlemania #bwf
John Cena vs. Triple H
Here. You guys write this one.
@jaydubshow ok, this match with Cena and HHH is getting good. #wwe.
@wellyourewrong My minor OCD kicks in when Cena locks in the STF…He never does it right, It drives me nuts. #wwe.
@leomc2 wow….SuperCena was easily able to lift his leg out of the pedigree…that’s something else right there……not #wwe #raw.
@colleen412 Very sloppy cover, Trip…very sloppy. #WWE.
@Xaneevents John Cena has an arm bar… a suplex… and his finishers. That’s it people. That’s his wrestling rolodex. #wwe.
@DCsPeoplesChamp LMAO Trips with a #Sharpshooter awesome #bwf
@x_tialicia tap, cena! tap!!! #WWE
@SanzJohnson HOW DA HELL DO U KICK OUT OF 2 PEDIGREES? #RAW #WWE
@shyguy_2004 Super Cena and Super H each kick out of their finishers. #wwe #raw
@iamthegame22 I think I see a red cape coming out of Cena’s back. #WWE
@wellyourewrong Trips goes over via The Pedigree #wwe
@TheGiorgis Good effort by Cena and Triple H. Really good TV match. #WWE #MondayNightRaw
After the match, Cena salutes the RAW audience, perhaps for the last time. I’ve got to agree with @TheGiorgis, that was a pretty solid TV match.
Still to come, Jericho vs. Michaels!
@_MFS_ #bwf Cena, Orton, HHH, HBK, lather, rinse, repeat and you’ve got RAW #WWE #RAW
@Rose974 #bwf : Raw is making me sad tonight. Won’t anything good happen?
SmackDown – last Friday: The Dirt Sheet mocks Marty Jannetty.
The Miz is in the house and set for action. His opponent tonight is in the ring. No wait. Snoop Dogg has a better idea. The Miz’s opponent is… believe it or not… MARTY JANNETTY!
@MorningToast The Miz vs. Janetty. Geezoo. Talk about scrapin’ the barrel… #wwe
The Miz vs. Marty Jannetty
In the end, it’s Mizzy Jannetty beating Marty Jannetty with the Skull Crushing Finale.
@CT_FOX Surprised Marty didn’t get the pop I thought he would..He was gr8t backintheday! Of course Michaels had the succ. career! #wwe #raw
Chavo Guerrero accompanies Jillian as she makes her way out for her Divas Championship match, and it’s announced that Melina, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly will face Michelle McCool, Beth Phoenix, and Natalya at Bragging Rights. Melina makes her entrance, and we’re set for action.
Melina def. Jillian
Chavo tried to interfere, but he’s stopped by Hornswoggle, who looks like he’s trying to dress like Paul E. Dangerously. Melina hits her finisher for the win.
After the match, Chavo goes after Hornswoggle, but Snoop Dogg comes to the rescue. The RAW Divas and celebrate with Snoop and Hornswoggle.
Alright guys, it’s that time for me to turn things over to BWF’s RAW guest host. This week, JT will be finishing things up for me as I head off to work. Thanks to all the members of the Twitterverse whose tweets were used tonight!
Commercial break- Saw 6 comes out Friday, I’d better go out and see Saw 5.
We return, some crappy song is the theme for Bragging Rights, it kinda sounds like a song off the new KISS CD but it isn’t.
Recap of the neverending Cena/Orton feud. This recap is neverending with some whiny song too.
Recap of the whole “Bragging Rights” ppv.
We go to commercial with Jericho wallking to the ring.
<Commercial Break> Geico can save you money on car insurance, the didn’t save me money. 60 million people have tried Kentucky Grilled Chicken, I am not one of them.
Back from break, two nascar guys host RAW next week. I don’t follow Nascar or I’d know who they are.
Jericho comes out first wearing a Smackdown shirt. King says that he’ll be at Smackdown this week. HBK comes out dancing like a retard. Jericho grabs a mic and says that “Smackdown has an advantage because he’s the captain” and says that they’ll defeat RAW, which leads to Team Smackdown to come out. Cryme Tyme cone out first thru the crown, followed by Kane and the rest of Team Smackdown. Team Smackdown is in the ring , HBK is outside, then HHH comes out followed by Team RAW. Both teams are face to face in the ring. HHH talks and says that “they all don’t like Smackdown” (wait Big Show wrestles on there sometmes) EXCUSE ME!!!! Vicki Guerrero comes out and announces that DX and Team RAW is gonna have to wait until Sunday. HHH tells Jericho to leave and that and that team RAW doesn’t have to listen to Vickie then HHH starts a brawl between Team RAW and Team Smackdown. They continue to brawl as we fade to black.
Wow what a pretty uneventful ending segment. Yeah it got the point across, but as soon as the brawl started the show ended.
Well thats RAW kiddies, thank you all for reading and see you all next time.
Like this post? Subscribe to our RSS Feed today and never miss another!