Tag Archive: Piper

  1. Remembering Paul Bearer

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    Today I read the news: Paul Bearer passed away. I remember when I first started watching wrestling was just before Wrestlemania XII. And one of the most unique characters of that time was Paul Bearer. I was a huge Undertaker fan and still am. Out of the wrestlers I mark out for the most-Piper, Double-A, Terry Funk, Tommy Dreamer-few of them compare to the mark-out feeling I get when I see the Undertaker. The Undertaker was unique. He had one of the greatest ring presences to ever grace our screens, with respect to Flair. And when it came to aura and mystique, there were few who could touch The Undertaker, if anyone.

    So why am I talking about The Undertaker when I’m reflecting on the Life of Paul Bearer? Well, it was hard to separate the two. As imposing and terrifying as the Undertaker was, Paul Bearer was the other half of him. You could not have had the Phenom Undertaker without Paul Bearer in his early days. They tried with Brother Love, but the character just missed something in the early days. It wasn’t until Paul Bearer became part of the Undertaker’s character that the character clicked. Eventually the time came for Paul to break away and the Undertaker soared, but without Paul, I’m not sure we would have seen the Undertaker we have now.

    One thing that stands out to me is how Paul was able to take anything, no matter how awful and make it into something good. Let’s face it. The Impostor Undertaker storyline in ’94 is one of the cheesiest things I’ve ever seen in wrestling. (And I’ve lived through Katie Vick, Kane-Shane McMahon and The Giant falling off Cobo Hall yet winning the world title.) Yet with all the players involved-Ted DiBiase, Brian Lee, The Undertaker & Paul Bearer-they made my inner kid believe in everything going on. Take the Kane storyline. Out of nowhere Paul Bearer was revealed to be the father. As preposterous as that sounded, through that interview with Jerry Lawler where they didn’t know the camera was running, he put together all the pieces. There was his return in the mid-2000’s that caused him to be buried alive in concrete by the Undertaker himself. With respect to all involved, there wasn’t anyone who could salvage that.

    The Undertaker and Paul Bearer were something special. How many times has the WWE tried the supernatural thing since then to little or no success? Mordecai? The Boogeyman? Kevin Thorn the Vampire? Countless other names I can’t remember because of their failure? Due to the stage presences of both men, they were able to make this something special and make countless dollars off this.

    There were so many great memories from him. There was the aforementioned Impostor Undertaker storyline. There was the feud with Diesel where Diesel did the unthinkable. He put his hands on Paul Bearer. That was back in ’96 when things still mattered. There was the Paul Bearer turn that broke my heart for a long time. Kane didn’t have much of a shelf life. Paul helped to give him fuel that kept him around today. There was the surprise appearance at Wrestlemania XX, where I remember marking out like a little kid for seeing him again. In 2010, Undertaker once again feuded with Kane. I remember seeing turning to Smackdown (which is something I never do), and I waited for him to appear from the casket. I was like a little kid watching him over and over again.

    He had so many signatures. There was the “Ohhhhhh, yyyeeeeeeesssssssss” he was so famous for. I still do that. It’s not at the same level as “Brother” or “What?” but it’s still pretty impactful. When I was telling my wife he had passed away this morning, I described him as the “Oh, yes” guy. (And yes, I did it in his voice, or my feeble attempt at his voice.) I still remember how he would say, “The urn.” Any time I hear the word urn, I immediately think about him. And that voice was so eerie and so spooky. With respect to the Macho Man, it was probably one of the most recognizable voices of his time.

    I never had the chance to meet Paul Bearer. I swear I had to have seen him live a time or two. (My first ever then-WWF show had a Kane appearance that must have been around Badd Blood ’97, so I think Bearer was there. It was just a long view from where I was.) I used to follow him on Facebook and after the birth of a grandchild, there were comments congratulating him and wishing him well. He took the time to like every one’s comments, including mine. I know it may have been little, but I thought it was pretty awesome. In the pre-Attitude era and in the Attitude era, there were fewer personalities who made a bigger impact. Brother Bearer, Uncle Paul, Mr. Pringle, thank you for your time on this Earth.

  2. RYTMANS RAW REVIEW – 08/13/2012

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    Let’s do things a bit differently this week.

    MATCH RESULTS

    • CM PUNK VS BIG SHOW – NO CONTEST: It’s basically Big Show dominating, with Punk fighting back from behind until Daniel Bryan comes out in a full mad-on. Bryan slaps the “no” lock on Punk and Show joins in for a “little rough up the champ” action until Cena makes the save. AJ comes out and pulls a “Teddy,” making a tag match for later in the night.

    • RYBACK DEFEATS JTG – This was in response to JTG griping backstage about not getting TV time. It’s the same match we’ve seen for about… ever.

    • R-TRUTH DEFEATS HEATH SLATER – After the match, the PTP (minus AW) run in for a beat down on R-Truth. Kofi supposedly is out of the country, leaving Truth outnumbered.

    • SIN CARA DEF TENSAI – Tensai spends most of the match overpowering Sin Cara, until the Lucha legend side-steps him into Sakamoto and hits a DDT from the top rope. Tensai beats down Sakamoto after the match.

    • DOLPH ZIGGLER DEF JERICHO/THE MIZ (3-WAY) – Jericho won a twitter poll to be the guest on Piper’s Pit. After a few minutes, Ziggler and Vicki come out to run Jericho down. Miz joins in and tries to kick Piper and Jericho out. After Jericho cleans house, we get a commercial break. When we come back, we’re told AJ made this match via twitter. Dolph gets the pin on the Miz.

    • LAYLA & KAITLYN DEF EVE & BETH PHOENIX – Pretty standard tag, with Layla actually trying to show some personality. (Nice spot with Layla butt-bumping Eve in the face.) Ends with Kait rolling Beth up for a three count.

    • JOHN CENA & CM PUNK DEF BIG SHOW & DANIEL BRYAN – Interesting theme here. NO ONE wants to tag out on either side. Bryan tags in whenever Show gets close. Show gets more and more bothered. Cena tags in whenever Punk gets close. Punk returns in kind. Punk and Cena do the “stealing each other’s moves,” routine, and eventually both Show AND Punk wash their hands of the whole thing. It ends with an AA on Bryan for the pin, and Punk rescuing (?) Cena from an attack from behind by Big Show.
    • DAMIEN SANDOW DEF CHRISTIAN – I have NEVER seen Christian jobbed out like this. Christian gets in an elbow shot from the top rope, but when he follows Sandow outside to the floor, and gets sent into the steps, Sandow bounces his head against the steel steps. Brodus Clay hobbles out on his bum leg to distract Sandow, but all Christian gets is a roll-up for two. Sandow ends this with his neck-breaker variation.

    Okay so, why the new approach? Well one, I’m sick of being up till three in the morning trying to recap EVERY segment in detail, and two, I wanted to get that stuff out of the way for my 1st official…

    RYTMAN RANT!

    Re: This show’s pacing, W.T.F?

    Here’s the deal, we have Shawn Michaels guest starring tonight. Apparently, Triple H’s flight was delayed, and he’s not there yet, so Shawn is scared. Every segment is Shawn looking over his shoulder like Daffy Duck during duck season, waiting for his inevitable Brock Beat-down. Eventually, Shawn is in the ring with Brock and Paul Heyman, and Hunter rolls in just in the nick of time to protect Shawn (which is a whole other thing) and sign the contract. Brock signs and leaves. Perfect spot to end the show…

    Except we have 15-20 minutes left.

    Okay so, umm… commercial break!

    And we’re back. Well, okay… let’s have a shot of Shawn and Hunter having a heart to heart that ends with Shawn walking off possibly pissed at Hunter. And we’re out!

    No we are not.

    Hoo-boy, okay-commercial… and interview Big Show about going into Summerslam-WAITAMINUTE! SOMETHINGS HAPPENING IN THE PARKING LOT! Heyman is blocking Shawn’s car with his car. They’re yelling at each other, AND LESNAR GRABS SHAWN! The camera goes black and we hear Lesnar beating down Shawn.

    Okay, end on a cliff-hanger; what happened to Shawn? Good, we’re out-no we’re not.

    We come back from commercial (notice a pattern?) to see Hunter and everyone else who wanted some extra camera time worrying about Shawn. We cut back to ringside where Lesnar has Shawn up in a fireman’s carry and is walking to the ring. Shawn takes the F-5 and as Hunter runs to the rescue, Lesnar locks on the arm-breaker. Heyman warns Hunter not to take another step, or Lesnar breaks Shawn’s arm; which he does anyway. Raw ends FOR REAL with trainers trying to help Shawn, and Lesnar running away with an evil grin on his face.

    And Raw comes in at 10:01 p.m. here in Chicago.

    Seriously

    We honestly couldn’t have Shawn get beaten up at the beginning of the show? We couldn’t put this contract signing crap in the middle of the show and get it over with in time for (what should’ve been) the main event? Did you guys try SO HARD to end on time that you wound up short? Could you have given that extra time to, maybe Christian/Sandow?

    This was a HUGE step backwards, I’m sorry, it is. You went from going overtime with the Main Events over the last two weeks, to going under trying to make time for a stupid segment that you had to strrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetch out with false endings to fill up time THAT YOU TOOK AWAY FROM THE MATCHES!

    (Sigh)

    Seriously WWE, re-evaluate your damn priorities before Raw goes the Nitro route.

    Cancelled

  3. RYTMAN RAW REVIEW 06/18/2012

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    We open with a recap of No Way Out, showing John Cena victorious over Big Show and Vince McMahon firing Johnny Laurenitis as Cena puts him through a table. Also, Cyndi Lauper guest stars tonight. (Why?)

    Mick Foley is here as special guest GM for tonight and Smackdown this Friday! His first official act is booking a tag team match between Kane and Daniel Bryan vs. Sheamus and C.M. Punk. Also, we get the farewell address from Johnny Ace.

    Big Johnny comes out in a neck brace, a sling, and on a crutch. As he enters the ring, Foley goes in for a hug or pat on the back, which aggravates Johnny’s injuries. Johnny demands the crowd be quiet, they refuse, Johnny ask Mick for help. Mick asks the crowd to quiet down. Mick then claims Johnny said “Long Island Sucks.” Johnny gets fed up and decides to do the speech later, but announces in his last official act as GM of both RAW and Smackdown, he has booked a handicap match with John Cena against Him, David Otunga, and Big Show.

    As Johnny leaves, Sheamus makes way to the ring for his big match. He locks eyes with Johnny and smirks. Punk is out next. With the kicking of dirt and the big thumb to the back, he mimics a baseball umpire and tells Johnny “you’re outta here.”

    COMMERCIAL

    We come back to see a recap of last week when AJ locked lips with Kane, taking him out of the match and giving her and Punk the win.

    Kane comes out to the pyro and scary Halloween music, followed by “The Flight of the Valkeries,” and Daniel Bryan. The crowd starts in with the “Yes! Yes! Yes!” chant.

    WWE CHAMPION C.M. PUNK / WORLD’S CHAMPION SHEAMUS VS. DANIEL BRYAN / KANE

    This is a fast paced brawl with a lot of high-impact spots. Both Sheamus and Punk play the face in peril, as Kane and Bryan do the most double teaming. The big tide changer is when AJ runs to ringside DRESSED UP EXACTLY LIKE KANE! MASK AND ALL! AJ skips around the ring and back up the stage. Kane follows her while Bryan takes a GTS/Brogue Kick combo from the champions and goes down for a three count.

    WINNERS: C.M. PUNK AND SHEAMUS

    Later tonight, we find out if Brock Lesnar will accept Triple H’s challenge for a match at Summer Slam.

    COMMERCIAL

    We come back to see Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger arguing over who the weak link in their team is. Vicki comes in with an “EXCUSE ME!” and demands they settle this in the ring. The men walk off and Vicki smiles.

    Fade in to Johnny and David Otunga sharing a laugh. Show comes in and wants to know what’s so funny. Johnny explains they were laughing at Cena and how bad he’s gonna get hurt tonight in the three on one handicap match, and how the WWE universe doesn’t deserve him. Johnny promises he’s going to leave a lasting impression tonight. Show doesn’t find anything funny anymore.

    COMMERCIAL

    We’re back with Ziggler and Swagger in the ring.

    DOLPH ZIGGLER VS JACK SWAGGER

    This was kind of a slow paced match until Ziggler tweaked his leg. From then on it was Swagger working the leg until Ziggler hit the Zig-Zag and scored a three count. Ziggler gets a kiss from Vicki and struts off into the sunset.

    WINNER: DOLPH ZIGGLER

    COMMERCIAL

    We’re back, and Lawler is reminiscing about the night we got the debut of Mr. Socko and a Stone Cold beat down in Vince’s hospital room. Lawler’s favorite part is Vince taking a bedpan to the head.

    Paul Heyman is here on behalf of Brock Lesnar to respond to Triple H’s challenge.
    •No, Lesnar will not drop his suit against WWE
    •No, Heyman will not drop his suit against Triple H
    •No, Brock Lesnar will not face Triple H at Summerslam
    Thank you for your time, good night.

    Time to Play the Game…

    Triple H is in the ring and this becomes a trade off of two of the best mike workers in this business. I’d fail at trying to quote this verbatim, so please try to find this on line. Basically, both men take shots at each other with winks to the smart marks, but the highlight is Heyman dressing down the game, taking shots at his new position in life. Of course it ends with Heyman out on his back, but it’s still an example of why the WWE needs him back on the stick.

    Up next, U.S. Champion Santino Morella vs. Alberto Del Rio

    COMMERCIAL

    We come back and Ricardo Rodriguez introduces Alberto Del Rio. Del Rio enters in a 150 thousand dollar Audi-T1000 as we get a promo for the Night of Champions PPV. Santino is out next and power-walks quickly to the ring.

    U.S. CHAMPION SANTINO MORELLA VS ALBERTO DEL RIO

    This is a quick match that has Del Rio working particularly vicious, as he’s taking out his frustration over being pulled from No Way Out on the arm of Santino. Santino gets in some offense but it amounts to little as he takes an inziguri to the head while setting up the Cobra. Del Rio hits the arm-bar and Santino taps.

    WINNER: ALBERTO DEL RIO

    Roberto actually gets some payback on Santino with a shoulder-drop as Alberto walks off.

    Promo for Cyndi Lauper making an appearance, featuring her “girls just wanna have fun,” video

    COMMERCIAL

    The lovely Layla, Divas champion, is in the ring introducing Cyndi Lauper AND WENDI RICHTER! She credits both women with setting the foundation for the Divas division. Cyndi looks “influenced,” Wendi has looked better, and the crowd does not love this.

    Heath Slater comes out to call this the train wreck it is. He gets in the ring, makes some snide remarks, and demands the chance to debut HIS NEW SINGLE.

    Slater wants to sing.

    Slater-haters gonna Slater-hate.

    And they do.

    Cue the bagpipes and its ROWDY RODDY PIPER out to make the save. He looks like he had some of what Cyndi had. He’s in the ring with a gold record, making reference to Capt. Lou Albano.

    CROWD: LOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

    He mentions having “a bad day,” all those years ago when he bashed Lou in the head with Cyndi’s gold record in Madison Square Garden, and wants to present her with a new one. They kiss and make-up, when Slater demands he get to finish his song. The segment ends with Lauper bashing Slater with the record. (Might’ve been a botch there as she did it twice, and left Slater with a cut on his head)

    COMMERCIAL

    We come back to a recap of the four way tag team match at No Way Out, featuring AW helping the Prime Time Players win the no.1 contenders spot for the tag team title, at the expense of Primo/Epico, the team he originally expressed interest in managing.

    AW comes out to introduce himself as the owner of All World productions and the new manager of The Prime Time Players.

    COMMERCIAL

    PRIMO/EPICO VS THE PRIME TIME PLAYERS

    It’s a very basic tag team match, with the bruisers (PTP) trying to out-muscle the high-flyers (P/E.) The match is cut short when AW simply pushes his team out of range and they take a count-out loss, explaining that his team already has the no.1 contender spot and doesn’t need this.

    WINNERS: EPICO/PRIMO

    Side Note: The crowd is DEAD for this match. No real faces to root for.

    COMMERCIAL

    We’re back with a promo for the upcoming 1000th show, July 23rd. We OFFICALLY go three hours on that night. (Question: didn’t we do that already?) DEGENERATION X will make a special appearance. That should kill the first two hours.

    Back in the ring, we have Johnny Ace, in a neck brace, arm-sling, and a crutch, cutting a promo, calling the WWE universe losers, (one by one,) because we’ve lost the era of “people power.” Next time we’ll see him is his hall of fame induction. This is the darkest day in WWE history, and he promises Cena will get an epic beat down. He introduces his tag team partner David Otunga, who comes to the ring making his usual pose-down, and next, the Big Show.

    COMMERCIAL

    We come back with Teddy joining the announce team and ripping up the name tag Johnny made him wear. Michael Cole gives him an epic ass-kissing. Big Show has the mike. He thanks Johnny for his Iron clad contract, his huge bonus, the chance to be a real giant, says he has nothing to prove, AND WALKS OUT ON THE MATCH!

    The music hits and John Cena is out.

    HANDICAP MATCH: JOHN CENA VS JOHNNY ACE/DAVID OTUNGA
    The crowd is really split tonight with the “Let’s go Cena/Cena Sucks” chant. The match begins with Cena dominating Otunga and Johnny Ace backing off every time Otunga tries for a tag. Johnny changes his mind once Otunga gets back in control. Once tagged in, Johnny ditches his wrappings and stomps away on Cena. Cena kicks out of a pin, Johnny tries for a tag AND OTUNGA WALKS OUT ON ACE!

    Johnny, in disbelief, turns around slowly. Cena unloads big on Johnny Ace with the “five moves of doom.” Three AA’s and an STF later, Johnny Ace taps out.

    WINNER: JOHN CENA

  4. Super SmackDown 4/10/12 – Where’s the big blue fist?!?

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    What do you mean it’s Tuesday and I have to review SmackDown?  I can’t even begin to tell you what’s wrong with that statement.  What’s that?  It’s a special Super SmackDown:  Blast From The Past edition?  And G can’t make it?  Alright, I guess I’ll do it.  Besides, they’ll probably break out the big blue fist for this, won’t they?

    Nope.  Dammit.  Oh well.  Let’s go.

    (more…)