It’s later than a pregnant woman’s period but here’s your TNA review.

Samoa Joe and Low Ki vs MVP and Kenny King
Ki and King start the match off as the crowd boredly chant “Joe’s gonna kill you”. They barely touch eachother before MVP and Joe end up in the ring with some beautiful chain wrestling. MVP pulls King out of the ring and Low Ki suicide dives on to both of them. MVP cheap shots Low Ki and he and King begin the ground and pound. Low Ki fights back eventually and Joe gets the hot tag. Joe takes both guys out and gets the visual tap as King taps but the ref doesn’t see it. Low Ki takes MVP out outside the ring and drop kicks King as he runs towards Joe. Great sequence. Joe makes King tap out again for the win.

Devon is backstage and says Magnus and Bram picked a fight with the wrong guy. He’s interrupted by a phone call and has backup. Roode is also shown backstage taping his wrists up.

Bram comes out and says he’s rewriting history. He says he’s going to destroy the Brotherhood of Hardcore and Abyss and Devon’s time is up. He calls out Magnus who joins him in the ring. Magnus says even if they aren’t brothers by blood, they’re brothers by the blood they’ve spilled and they’ve been disturbing the peace since they were kids. He’s still the guy who made history and broke the glass ceiling for the Brits. It’s still his time, and now with Magnus it’s their time. Bram says the two of them are going to rule the place and get rid of the dinosaurs of hardcore. Devon comes out on to the ramp and tells Bram to shut up. Devon brings out his backup for the night; Tommy Dreamer. To provide comic relief Tenay said Bully is taking time off to heal up and Tazz said they hope to see him again soon as Bragnus and Drevon beat the crap out of eachother. Devon and Dreamer scare them off with chairs and the segment ends.

Madison Rayne and Taryn Terrell are backstage. Rayne apologises for something that happened a few weeks ago. Apparently she pulled her tights. I can’t remember this at all. Teryn says they should focus on their common enemy because they’re against the “Beautiful” “People” tonight.

Shark Boy is backstage eating a hot dog. He signs some autographs for kids and takes pictures. Someone comes in and says he’s really let himself go and he’s blowing his chance here. He says this isn’t the real Shark and he asks Shark Boy if he can get in shape and be Shark Boy one more time. Shark Boy gives us a “Shell yeah” and walks off and the guy says there’s no chance it’ll actually happen.

The Beautiful People vs Taryn Terrell and Madison Rayne
FFW! Madison Rayne walks out on Taryn who gets pinned by both women.

Kurt Angle is backstage and lies, saying he’ll call the match down the middle tonight.

EC3 and Tyrus vs The Hardy Boys
Ethan starts with Matt and beats him off (COCK TALK!). Jeff comes in quickly and the Hardys use quick tags to control Ethan. Tyrus comes in and dominates Matt. Tyrus and Ethan take turns beating up Matt. It’s okay though because all those cheeseburgers gave him a protective layer of fat. Ethan misses a Stinger Splash and Matt makes the tag. Jeff and Matt take control of Ethan but he tags in Tyrus who takes them both out. They fight back with a double Twist of Fate and a Swanton for the win. Way to take away any momentum Tyrus might have had. Ethan and Tyrus argue outside the ring.

The Revolution come out to the ring and Storm says…a storm is coming. Before a storm there is quiet and the storm is very close. He doesn’t prey on the weak and instead brings them strength. They’re now loyal and disciplined and any of them can be a champion because the Revolution just gets things done. They’re here to extend an offer to Davey Richards, who comes out on his own. Storm says Davey is a part of a great team, and he was too, but his team went down because his partner held him back and the same will happen to Davey too. That’s why he’s offering him a spot. Before Davey can say anything Eddie comes out and begs Davey to tell him Storm isn’t getting through and there’s something wrong with his head. There’s no way Davey would give up everything they have for Storm. Davey grabs the microphone from Eddie and says he can speak for himself. Instead of saying anything Eddie challenges Storm to a match and it’s on.

Eddie Edwards vs James Storm
They cut to break straight away and when back Eddie is in control as Manik talks to Davey on the outside. Storm takes control with the distraction and keeps Eddie down and out. Edwards fights back but ultimately gets DDT’d off the middle turnbuckle. Sanada distracts the ref but Eddie sends Storm into him and gets a 2 count. He Moonsaults Storm from the ring and Manik talks to Davey again. Eddie baseball slides him and the Wolves argue. Edwards turns around into a Last Call Superkick and takes the loss. Tazz and Tenay tease tension by saying Davey should have told Eddie that Storm was winding up to kick him. Richards stares at Storm as he backs out the ring and up the ramp.

Bobby Roode vs Bobby Lashley for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship with Kurt Angle as the special referee
Bobby wins. I know how this match is going to go but let’s sit and watch it anyway. Lashley controls the start of the match and Angle keeps it fair. Roode fights back but never stays in control very long. Lashley utterly dominates during a commercial break but Roode manages to fight back hard and snap Lashley’s neck from the corner. He hits a Spinebuster for a two and Lashley fights back with a Spinebuster of his own for a two. Lashley accidentally clothesline Angle and hits a Spear. Lashley brings Kurt around to get a two count. Roode dodges the next two Spear attempts, with the second taking Angle out completely. One of the stage hands next to the ring eats a Spear too. Pretty much everybody but Roode ate a Spear. Roode hits a Roode Bomb on the ramp and drags Lashley’s corpse back to the ring. Roode gets the visual pin and Brian Hebner runs out to count two. Lashley hits a low blow and grabs his title. Hebner tells him to put the title down and Lashley obliges, and clotheslines Hebner before picking the title back up. He charges at Bobby and knocks him out with it. Angle comes around and climbs into the ring and counts two. Lashley picks up Roode but Roode fights out. Roode pulls Lashley off the top rope and falls down on to Lashley for the three count with a sit down pin. Roode is your new champion. It was a good match but a bad ending. After all that cool fighting Roode flukes his way into a win. Whoo.

Well that’s your show. It was decent overall but I never really got into it. If you missed this you didn’t miss too much.

Post by Noyce

Mark Noyce is one of the co-hosts of Bored Wrestling Fan and occasional contributor to the site. He's published a few books on Amazon you can find by searching his name and is looking for voice and written work so contact him via Twitter if you're interested.

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