This is the first chance I’ve had at a computer since Thursday. There were no “Impact” Impressions this week, and my apologies for that, but frankly, I was so angry at this past week’s show that, if I had to miss one, that was the one to miss.

I live just outside of Houston, Texas, and have been partaking of the glorious wrestling goodness of the weekend. Friday night, I attended Ring of Honor’s “Supercard of Honor IV.” A series of words appearing on a screen cannot and will not do justice to the magnificence that was this show. Awesome, in the original sense of inspiring reverence to the point of fear, is the only word that even vaguely approaches what this show was like. The second, the very second, that this dvd comes out, BUY IT!!!!! Everyone must see this show, by any means necessary. If you do not own this dvd the instant that it is made available to the public, or manage to see whatever clips of it show up on a Video Wire, you are not a wrestling fan, you have no soul whatsoever, and are unworthy to draw breath on my planet. This is less of a review and more of a brief impression commentary. When you check out the show for yourselves, you’ll see why it’s pointless to try to capture it in words.

The show was held at the George R. Brown Convention Center, which is a huge convention hall. Up on the third floor, one felt as if one had accidentally wandered into some industrial action movie. The set-up was great, and the general admission area was done stadium-style, so there really wasn’t a bad seat in the place. I heard estimates of between 1800 and 2000, but I’ll have to get back to you on that. Very much an international audience. I personally talked to people from Spain, Germany, Ireland, Scotland, and Canada. Some people had actually come to see Ring of Honor, and weren’t going to Wrestlemania.

Pre-Show matches:

Dirty Ernie Osiris and Ninja Brown vs. Alex “Sugarfoot” Payne and Andy Ridge: Ernie panhandled the crowd on his way in. Chants of “Mini Necro” weren’t undeserved. He kind of looks like him. Sugarfoot is so over everywhere! I like the guy, but I don’t see why he’s THAT popular. Interesting. A fun opening match, with Ninja Brown getting pinned by Sugarfoot for the win. Andy Ridge is pretty good too. I suppose Ninja Brown has since been forced to commit seppukku.

Don Juan and Andy Duncan vs. Grizzly Redwood and Bushwhacker Luke: Grizzly’s partner was a total surprise. They actually meshed pretty well, and it was fun. Lots of people were yelling at Andy Duncan with comments like, “Shannon Moore, you’ve really let yourself go!” He did rather resemble a porky Shannon Moore, so it was fair. Grizzly and Luke get the win.

Main Show Matches:

Rhett Titus vs. Erick Stevens: Rhett Titus has the greatest ring entrance ever. He bumps and grinds all the way to the ring, picks out a chick at ringside, puts a plastic card hotel room key in his mouth, makes her take it from him with her mouth, and makes her kiss him on the cheek. It’s truly grand, and I don’t see how anyone doesn’t love to watch this guy perform. Erick Stevens was really over. Stevens gets the win with a nasty-looking lariat.

Kevin Steen, Jay Briscoe, & Magno vs. Chris Hero, Eddie Edwards, & Incognito (6-man Tag Team Match): This match hadn’t been going on for very long when the top rope came down. A piece of metal hardware attaching the rope to the top turnbuckle snapped. It sounded like a gunshot. In a beautiful illustration of why you have can’t script every move and word and thought of every wrestler, all six guys kept going and improvised and acted like they didn’t even notice. Some moves came off the second rope instead of the top, the two luchadores actually climbed on top of the ring posts and jumped off, and the match in general wasn’t affected at all. Imagine if such a thing had happened at Wrestlemania. Yeah. The action was tremendous, and both teams worked together extremely well. Chris Hero hits a running elbow strike on Magno to get the win for his team.

Side note: After the match ended, several crew guys and Grizzly Redwood came running out and made repairs. We had brought a cake to the show. While buying streamers, my real brother asks my brother from another mother, “Should we get a birthday cake too?” My brother from another mother replies, “I can’t think of a reason why not.” So we brought this big sheet cake that said “Happy Birthday” on top. While the ring was being repaired, we thought we’d give the audience something else to do besides listen to the stupid smarky people who were chanting at the ring crew, and the cake was passed around like a joint through the audience. Even the ref came over and acted like he was going to take it away, then took some frosting and walked off. There were chants of “Next World Cake! Next World Cake!” from one side. Even chants of “Let’s go Cake Guy!” started up. A completely random and nonsensical moment, but more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

Roderick Strong vs. Katsuhiko Nakajima: I know that as a wrestling fan, I am contractually obligated to worship Ric Flair as the master of the chop, but that title has now officially been relinquished to Roderick Strong. Jeebus! Roddy gets the win in a great match.

Bobby Dempsey came out to fight in a “Sweet and Sour Challenge Match.” His opponent? Kamala, the Ugandan Giant! With Kim Chee! The match never actually happens, though. Bobby tears off his shirt to show the same paintings on his chest and belly that Kamala has, and the two slap their bellies together. Shane Hagadorn has a problem with this, and hits Kim Chee, and Kamala and Dempsey team up to take out Hagadorn, then leave together with Kim Chee. Fun!

El Generico vs. Claudio Castagnoli vs. Brent Albright vs. Blue Demon Jr. (Four Corner Survival Match): Claudio’s new music, robe, and entrance are grand! Albright didn’t wait for his entrance, he rushed the ring and attacked Claudio. Solid action all around, and some fun bits between Generico and Blue Demon. Claudio gets the win by rolling up Brent Albright, then bails before Albright can attack him.

Bryan Danielson vs. Alex Koslov: Danielson was smiling and laughing and just having a good time the who night. Koslov made a very strong showing, though no one thought he was going to win. Seeing him in ROH would be great. Danielson gets the win when Koslov taps to the Cattle Mutilation.


Colt Cabana vs. D-Lo Brown: If anyone reading this review knows where I can get a copy of Colt Cabana’s new entrance music (Boom Boom Colt Cabana), please let me know at once. I must have that song. Needless to say, Colt was tremendously over. D-Lo gets the win by using a foreign object to hit Cabana. Good match.

KENTA vs. Davey Richards (GHC Jr. Heavyweight Title Match): Sweet. Mother. Of. God. This was the match of the night. KENTA was over like mad, and Davey Richards was absolutely on fire. Chants of “This is wrestling!” and “Fuck Wrestlemania!” were heard throughout. Super stiff kicks and strikes from both guys. KENTA finally gets the pin after a GTS and retains his title. Davey Richards grabbed the mic and said, “THAT is what Ring of Honor is all about!” and threw the mic down and left. If this match doesn’t blow your mind when you see it, you didn’t have one to begin with. If this had been the only match, it would have been worth the ticket price.

Tyler Black & the Necro Butcher vs. Jimmy Jacobs & Austin Aries (Grudge Tag Team Match): Sleazy porn star mustache chickenshit heel Austin Aries is great. I still want to cheer him, but I won’t. He actually covers his ears when people chant his name. Very solid match, with Aries hitting Black with a brainbuster for the win. Aries and Jacobs fought among themselves quite a bit.

Nigel McGuinness vs. Jerry Lynn (ROH World Title Match): People can claim that they knew that Nigel was dropping the belt to Jerry Lynn tonight due to injury all that they like. It isn’t always about the result, it’s about how you get there. This match was outstanding in the story that it told and the level of raw emotion involved. The false finishes in this match must be seen to be believed. Nigel basically fought without using his arms much at all, and he almost got the pin several times. Lynn used the Cradle Piledriver more than once to finally get the win. When the bell rang, several big, muscular guys sitting behind me jumped up and down and hugged each other, shouting and hurrahing. Huge chants of “Thank you, Nigel” started up almost immediately. Jerry Lynn is the new (and 11th) Ring of Honor World Champion.

I’ll try to get a write-up of the Saturday night ROH show, the “Take No Prisoners” ppv, before I head out to Wrestlemania itself.

Peace out,

1 Comment

  1. If you get this before you leave for the show, have a great time tonight. I wish Paint Fingers and I could be a part of the festivities, but sadly we couldn't afford it. We're gearing up to order it on PPV while rocking our WM 24 shirts.

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