On a historic Inauguration Day, ECW on SciFi eminates from the Allstate Arena in Chicago, IL.  Tonight, it’s a fatal four way match featuring The Miz, John Morrison, Finlay, and Mark Henry.  Also, will we hear anything new about Tommy Dreamer’s potential retirement?  All this, and ECW Champion Jack Swagger, tonight on SciFi!

Review after the jump!Matt Hardy is introduced by Todd Grisham to kick off ECW.  He comes to the ring and Grisham shows us footage of Matt’s brother Jeff getting blown to smithereens in a freak pyrotechnics accident this past Friday on SmackDown.  He asks for an update.  Jeff’s at home and recovering.  He went into shock, and he’s suffering from first degree burns.  Grisham asks if it’s just a coincidence.  Matt says that they both know it wasn’t an accident, but that’s all he’s going to say right now.  Anywho, last week, Matt lost to Jack Swagger, but he’s got a rematch this Sunday at the Royal Rumble.  Matt says Swagger is better than he thought he was.  Matt’s got no excuses.  The new ECW Champion, dressed in a nice suit, comes to the ring carrying his shiny new belt.  Grisham asks Swagger how it feels to be the new ECW Champion.  Swagger says he feels like he looks – great!  Matt’s right, he can’t take anything away from Swagger – including his ECW Championship.  Swagger’s the new face of this franchise, and if Matt thinks he’s going to take the title away from him, his brother won’t be the only one going down in flames.  Hardy slaps the ECW Champion, and then tackles him on the outside of the ring.  Officials are quick to break up the fray, but as they’re holding Hardy back, Swagger punches him in the face.

Know what I just found out?  Jack Swagger’s Rage Against The Machine-sounding theme music is actually performed by a Rage cover band called Age Against The Machine, and it will be on the new Voices:  WWE The Music Vol. 9 CD that comes out next Tuesday!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Ricky Ortiz makes his way out to the ring for competition with Adam Evans, whoever that is.

Ricky Ortiz def. Adam Evans

Remember the old squash matches from back in the day on WWF Superstars?  Yeah, think about one of those.  That’s what this was.  Ortiz wins with The Big O, and about five people stand up and cheer.

After the match, Ortiz grabs the mic and thanks Chicago for their support, and tells them not to forget to rally up.  Grisham asks Striker what “Rally Up” means, and Striker guesses that it’s got something to do with North Carolina.

Last week on ECW, Tommy Dreamer announced his intent to retire if he can’t win the ECW Championship by the time his contract expires in June.  Backstage, Teddy Long tells Tommy that he’d give him a title match if he’d just come to him.  Dreamer says it’s not about that, it’s about proving to himself that he’s at that level.  Paul Burchill interrupts.  He excuses himself, saying that some people still have careers worth saving.  Long tells them to break it up, and Burchill explains that he wants a rematch with DJ Gabriel.  Long tells him that you don’t demand things on his show.  He’ll have a match tonight, but it’ll be against an opponent of his choosing.  Oh yeah, and that match is next!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

The Burchills are in the ring when we come back.  Who will his opponent be?  He’s the Boogeyman, and he’s coming to get you!

The Boogeyman def. Paul Burchill via disqualification

Katie Lea looks genuinely freaked out by the presense of The Boogeyman.  Paul, on the other hand, doesn’t.  He goes right after the Boogeyman, I think.  I can’t see anything through the smoke from the Boogeyman’s staff thingy.  Boogeyman stars to mount a comeback.  Boogeyman goes for the pumphandle slam, but Katie Lea comes in and kicks him in the leg, earning her brother the DQ.

After the match, Boogeyman comes after Katie Lea, but Paul rescues her before she could get wormed.  Boogeyman then lies out a pallate of worms on the desk of the ECW announcers.

Still to come, Miz vs. Morrison vs. Finlay vs. Henry in a fatal four way!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

RAW Rewind: Mr. McMahon gets his head nearly kicked off by Randy Orton after reinstating Chris Jericho.

Grish and Striker run down the card for the Royal Rumble and we get that cool 2008 Royal Rumble by the numbers video package.  I love the Royal Rumble – it’s my second favorite PPV of the whole year, just behind WrestleMania.  One of these years I’m actually going to get to go to one.

John Morrison makes his way out to the ring, and we’re almost set for fatal four way main event action!  His tag team partner, who is one of his opponents tonight, is out next – which is conveniently when this match is – NEXT!

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Mark Henry is already stepping into the ring when we come back, and Finlay makes his way out next, and we’re finally ready to kick things off in our main event.

John Morrison won a Fatal Four Way match

The three heels work together early on – well, Miz and Morrison do, Henry just directs traffic.  Finlay starts to battle back, but that doesn’t last long.  The three heels go back on the attack just before the…

<COMMERCIAL BREAK>

Henry overpowers Finlay when we come back, but then he’s attacked by the World Tag Team Champions, who dominate the World’s Strongest Man – at least until they give him a breather.  Henry gets up and takes both men down several times.  Finlay goes for a top rope move on Henry, but Henry catches him and sends him crashing to the canvas.  Henry dominates for a little while, until Finlay drops him with a shillelagh shot to the knee.  That’s when the tag champs take over, hitting several double team moves on Finlay after knocking Henry to the outside.  Henry is hurt, and waves off the match, heading toward the back.  Finlay reverses a double team move by Miz and Morrison into a double bulldog, and Hornswoggle nails the Tadpole Splash on Morrison.  Finlay drops Miz with the Celtic Cross, but before he can get the cover, Morrison kicks him away from Miz, then covers Miz himself for the victory!

After the match, the World Tag Team Champions argue, and SmackDown goes off the air.

My thoughts: It was another entertaining hour of ECW on SciFi.  So… where to begin?  Ricky Ortiz.  This is a guy that I saw potential in, but despite his early push, the WWE has done nothing with the guy.  I don’t give a crap about him anymore, and him being stuck in a match with some jobber isn’t going to reverse that.  Paul Burchill.  This is an insanely talented performer from Chelsea, England, and somebody somehow sees him as a guy they can use to job to guys with gimmicks that are even dumber than his old Pirate schtick.  Jack Swagger.  This guy has it.  It’s that thing that you just can’t teach.  It’s that factor that only comes along once in a great while.  Unless Swagger falls into bad habits outside of the ring, he’s going to be a huge star someday.  Anyways, guys, that’s it for me tonight.  Drow will be along sometime around Friday-ish to give us her “Impact Impressions” for the week.  I’ll be here Friday night with SmackDown coverage.  JT will likely have another great edition of “Random Randomness” this weekend, and I’ll be by with Royal Rumble predictions before the show on Sunday!

Post by thinksojoe

The founder of BoredWrestlingFan.com and it’s parent company, Fropac Entertainment, ThinkSoJoE has been a wrestling fan since he first saw WWF television in 1986 at the age of four. His first wrestling memory was Hulk Hogan on Saturday Night’s Main Event talking about getting King Kong Bundy in a cage at WrestleMania 2. Sixteen years later, he met Hulk Hogan on the eve of WrestleMania X-8. On December 9, 2013, he legitimately won a Slammy Award (Best Crowd of the Year). ThinkSoJoE currently hosts the weekly BWF Radio podcast.


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5 Comments

  1. I agree completely on the matter of Paul Burchill. Seriously, though, am I really the only person who enjoyed the pirate gimmick? He looked like he was having fun, and I thought they were going to push it hard to tie in with the third "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie that was going to open about that time. They really didn't give it time to click before dropping it. It could have gone over really well. But then, as I have played a pirate for money before, I'm biased.


  2. I agree completely on the matter of Paul Burchill. Seriously, though, am I really the only person who enjoyed the pirate gimmick? He looked like he was having fun, and I thought they were going to push it hard to tie in with the third "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie that was going to open about that time. They really didn't give it time to click before dropping it. It could have gone over really well. But then, as I have played a pirate for money before, I'm biased.


  3. My only problem with the pirate gimmick, which Burchill played so well, is that it was really one of those "Limited Time Only" gimmicks from the get-go. If they would've kept it going, he probably would have wound up in that Funaki-esque role in the company. Sure, he's jobbing now, but at least he's not a pirate!


  4. You're right. However, for that limited time, it could have been great. He didn't even get that limited time, not really. That's my main issue with it.


  5. You're right. However, for that limited time, it could have been great. He didn't even get that limited time, not really. That's my main issue with it.


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