Rich Flynn’s “Smackdown” Report 12/31/10By Drowgoddess · · 4 Comments
Hey, BWFers! Rich Flynn here, with a slightly delayed New Year’s edition of the SmackDown! report. Hope you all had a great Christmas and New Year; here’s hoping 2011 treats us all well.
For some reason, I thought we were getting two episodes of SmackDown! last week (the live episode on the Tuesday, then the regular Friday show), but apparently I was dreaming. All the same, let’s get started with the last show of 2010, shall we?
Tonight, our main event sees Edge and Rey Mysterio take on Alberto Del Rio and Kane.
The show begins with Dolph Ziggler coming down to the ring with Vickie Guerrero. Vickie is looking a little out-of-sorts as she is given a microphone. She says she is here to file an official complaint against John Cena. During the handicap main event last week, Cena lifted Vickie up onto his shoulders. It’s an atrocity, she says. As a result, she now suffers from a serious case of vertigo. Dolph pulls a sheet of paper from behind his Intercontinental title, and starts to lecture the audience on the medical definition of vertigo. Kofi Kingston’s music soon puts a stop to this. Kofi enters the ring, and says everyone in the arena is getting nauseous listening to Dolph and Vickie. He says that Vickie’s vertigo didn’t seem to affect her at TLC, and we’re treated to a still picture of Vickie climbing a ladder at the PPV, trying to grab the Intercontinental title. Wait – didn’t Vickie say she got her vertigo last week? TLC was two weeks ago… Anyway, Kofi brings up the controversial end to the match at TLC, when Kofi and Jack Swagger dropped the belt from the top of the ladder, only for Dolph to scoop up the belt and sneak away with the win. Enter Jack Swagger, who shows a video clip of the aforementioned title steal at TLC. All three men start bickering back and forth, which boils down to Ziggler trying to cheap-shot Kofi. Kingston manages to clear the ring of the other two men, before Teddy Long makes an appearance. After inviting everyone to his ‘New Years Holla-Holla-Holiday Party’, Teddy announces that Dolph will be defending his title in a Triple Threat match tonight.
Big Show vs. Dashing Cody Rhodes: Early on in the match, Big Show performs a Stinkface-of-sorts. Hideous. Rhodes recovers and hits Show with a Beautiful Disaster kick, but it’s not enough to take the giant down. Big Show fights back, and sets up his knockout punch, but Rhodes evades to the outside of the ring and swiftly exits to the back. Kinda pointless count-out victory for Show.
Your winner: Big Show
We go backstage to what is presumably Teddy Long’s ‘New Year Holla-Holla-Holiday Party’. Beth Phoenix chats to JTG, Drew McIntyre mingles with Curt Hawkins, and Alberto Del Rio’s NXT rookie sniffs Eva Mendes’s tray of cheese. I can’t believe I just typed that. Anyway, Teddy Long approaches a microphone and asks some of the SmackDown! Superstars to come up and make some New Years Resolutions. Enter Drew McIntyre, who promises that not only will he be a world champion in 2011, but he’ll also be a better person. Face turn is definitely on the cards for the Sinister Scotsman. Chavo then storms in, bottle of champagne in hand, and berates the locker-room in a drunken rant. Teddy informs Chavo that the champagne is non-alcoholic; nobody seems very amused. Bizarre segment, to say the least.
Drew McIntyre vs. Trent Baretta: I love Trent Baretta, but we all know how this match is going down. The commentators give a few mentions to how quickly McIntyre destroyed Kaval last week – which turned out to be Kaval’s last televised appearance on WWE television. Good luck to the World Warrior, wherever he heads to now. Back to this match, and Trent Baretta manages to counter Drew’s headlock into one of his own. I have an inkling that’ll be about the extent of Trent’s offense in this match. McIntyre powerbombs Baretta into the corner and follows it up with a stiff slap to the face. This match is going on a lot longer than I expected. Baretta connects with a sweet enziguri from out of nowhere, but only musters a two-count. He follows up with a springboard missile dropkick that sends McIntyre outside! I was so wrong about this match at the beginning, haha. Baretta attempts a Suicide Dive to the outside, but Drew dodges out of the way. Ouch. McIntyre looks visibly shocked, and the ref checks on Trent before running to the timekeeper to have the bell rung. Tony Chimel announces McIntyre as the winner, and Drew’s shock turns to a grin as he starts slowly applauding. McIntyre picks up Baretta from the floor, and lays him out with a Futureshock DDT. ‘Good job, kid. Happy New Year.’
Your winner: Drew McIntyre
Back to Teddy Long’s party, and LayCool decide to interrupt the fun. They say that they didn’t lose at TLC – they were too skinny to break the table, whereas Natalya is the one who was heavy enough. ‘Pigs flying’ jokes ensue, yadda yadda. Beth and Natalya appear, and the two teams start arguing until Teddy breaks them apart and announces they will square off in a tag match tonight.
Edge/Rey Mysterio vs. Alberto Del Rio/Kane: There’s not much to mention about this match, in all honesty. As usual, Del Rio shines throughout with his dirty tactics. One thing that bugs me is the fact we still don’t know exactly what happened to Paul Bearer – what condition is he in? The commentary team makes no mention of him at all. Anyway, this match ends with Kane being dumped over the rope, and Edge and Mysterio taking Del Rio out with a 619-into-Spear combo.
Your winners: Edge/Rey Mysterio
Backstage, once more, to Teddy’s party. Chavo tries to impress Kaitlyn by inhaling helium from a balloon which has no helium in it. Chris Masters and Hornswoggle take turns flexing their pecs. Big Show talks to Kelly Kelly about being her BFF. I think someone’s laced the party punch with LSD. Teddy Long announces two matches for next week’s SmackDown! – Alberto Del Rio will face Rey Mysterio in a 2 out of 3 Falls match. Also, Kane will face Edge for the World Heavyweight Championship in a Last Man Standing match.
Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. LayCool: The commentators show their usual non-interest during this match by going completely off-topic several times. Matt Striker gains respect by announcing he has two cats that are named after the members of Midnight Express! This match culminates with Natalya locking in the Sharpshooter on Layla, but Michelle McCool is quick to make the save with a vicious boot to the moosh of the Diva’s champion. Natalya manages to tag in the Glamazon, who drops McCool with a Glam Slam for the victory.
Your winners: Beth Phoenix/Natalya
We return, once again, to Teddy Long’s backstage party. He congratulates everyone for a great year, and adds that, for the first time ever, they’ve managed to host a party without it breaking down into a fight. Hmm, I wonder what’s about to happen next…? Chavo takes over the mic, and announces how lame the party is. Big Show responds by dumping the contents of the punch bowl over Chavo’s head. Before we know it, people are throwing cake and snacks at each other.
Intercontinental Championship: Dolph Zigger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger: It’d be good to see Ziggler pick up a strong pinfall victory here, but I get the feeling he’ll steal another win tonight. Kingston almost gets the pin over Swagger after an insanely high cross body. The crowd are really invested in this match – these three have been very impressive as of late. I hope the folks in charge are paying attention. Later on, Kofi comes close again with a devastating DDT on Swagger, but Vickie Guerrero puts Swagger’s foot on the rope while the ref is counting. Swagger recovers and goes for a Gutwrench Powerbomb, but Kofi counters and retaliates with a Trouble In Paradise. Ziggler appears from nowhere before Kofi can make a cover, and rolls him up, pulling on the tights for a three-count. Yep, another stolen victory. At least he’s still champ!
Your winner: Dolph Ziggler
Well, that’s it for 2010! Join us again here next week on BoredWrestlingFan for a new year of SmackDown!. Cheers!
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Smackdown felt kind of stagnant here, and I would expect this was intentional. It did air on New Year's Eve, so why make any big moves with so few eyes glued to the tube? Or at least, that's my thinking. There was some decent action here, and I was happy to see that Baretta wasn't completely squashed by McIntyre. I'm sure creative is scratching their heads as what to do with the guy though.
Chavo's bits made me cringe and laugh at the same time. I found it hilarious that his antics were all in attempts to get a cheap high off of various things, being the whole PG TV approach. But as you pointed out with the punch being laced, Chavo was probably just a collective hallucinogenic imagination of Teddy Long's personal indulgence? Ha ha…
Happy belated New Year Rich!
Aye, I have to say, I found this episode hard to write on – it was pretty dry!
I do love Teddy's party shenanigans, I must admit. Sometimes it just leaves me completely bamboozled. 😛
Happy belated New Year to you too, Gee!
Rich, message me on Facebook with your email address, I’ll get you set up to post these on your own. Also, thanks for the great work!
Thanks, man. I'll get in touch just now. I was gonna message you a while back but didn't wanna pester – holiday times are busy for everyone!