I’m awake tonight, and I’m not able to play my Xbox 360 (damned Red Ring of Death), so I’m going to do something unprecedented, at least for our site – a realtime report for the Friday Night show!
SmackDown kicks off with a recap of the draft, followed by Vicki Guerrero saying she sincerely hopes that Mr. McMahon doesn’t have to be in a wheelchair for the rest of her life. She then says we’re going to celebrate SmackDown’s good fortunes in the draft, starting with the new voice of SmackDown, JR! I just popped for Mick Foley – he’s wearing a Buffalo Bisons jersey!
It’s time to play the game! The WWE Champion is the first superstar to make his way to the SmackDown ring this evening. Hunter says Mr. McMahon’s whole world came crashing down around him – or basically on top of him. Trips says Mick Foley has a keen sense of style, and calls JR the greatest announcer in the history of this business. He says it doesn’t matter which show you’re a fan of, you’re a fan of the WWE Universe, which makes HHH feel at home. Now to shill the PPV, where Hunter will defend the WWE Championship against John Cena.
The WWE Champion is interrupted by the World Heavyweight Champion. Rumor has it that they can’t coexist. Edge thinks otherwise. Triple H disagrees with Edge, as they both have massive egos (Triple H’s is much bigger than Edge’s according to Triple H), and after this Sunday, Triple H will still be WWE Champion. Edge gives Triple H a history lesson – Batista has never beaten Edge for the World Heavyweight Champion, whereas Triple H lost his only one on one match with John Cena. Edge says that SmackDown is his house, this is his show (I’m sure the Rock is proud), and that Triple H needs to respect him like everybody else…
Which cues Batista.
Triple H dumps Edge over the top rope, right into a Batista spear. Batista enters the ring, and, to quote JR, “holy Evolution,” as The Animal and The Game hold the two world championships high.
Later tonight – WrestleMania 24 rematch, with brand roles reversed – Batista vs. Umaga, and Edge takes on U.S. Champion Matt Hardy. Rey Mysterio gives his SmackDown farewell address.
SmackDown comes back from break – after the jump.
Back from break, RAW’s ECW Champion, Kane is in tag team competition here on SmackDown. Kane is spanning three brands in a single match. His partner tonight is actually a SmackDown superstar, one of his opponents on Sunday, The Big Show. Their opponents are MVP, who apparently doesn’t have the cool tunnel entrance anymore, and Kane’s other opponent on Sunday, ECW’s Mark Henry (though the graphic still says SmackDown). It’s actually a weird phenomenon that I didn’t think about when covering the supplemental draft on Wednesday, and that’s the fact that SmackDown had already been recorded, so the supplemental draft has no effect on tonight’s broadcast. Anyways, Kane and The Big Show take turns beating up on MVP. After a press slam by Big Show, MVP hurries to tag Mark Henry, who is not in much of a hurry to get in there with Show. The world’s strongest man doesn’t fare much better, but as soon as he gained the upper hand on Kane, MVP tags himself in. MVP keeps the upper hand for a bit, but Kane powers out of a chinlock and takes over. MVP decides to leave, but Henry thinks otherwise, tossing him back into the ring with Kane, who delivers a chokeslam for the win!
Vicki is with her wedding planner when Edge rushes in to tell Vicki what happened to him earlier, and that Batista has his belt. She promises that she’ll get his belt back from Batista by the end of the night.
Back from break, we get an Umaga video package.
More tag team action coming up – Finlay and Hornswoggle, who are now actually on ECW, make their way to the ring. Their opponents tonight are Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder. (Note to self – Hawkins is the one in the short trunks). Hawkins kicks things off for the Edge Heads against Finlay. Finlay dominates until he’s distracted by Ryder on the outside. Ryder gets the tag, and maintains the advantage. The Edgeheads start to use quick tags, but Finlay is too crafty, backdropping Ryder over the top rope, then hitting the Celtic Cross on Hawkins, tagging Hornswoggle, who hits the tadpole splash to get the pin. Miz and Morrison come to the stage and point at Finlay and Hornswoggle. Those two teams will do battle this Sunday night at Night of Champions.
Edge and Matt Hardy square off next!
The United States Champion, ECW’s Matt Hardy makes his way to the ring. He’ll take on Chavo Guerrero this Sunday at Night of Champions, but for now, he’s got a date with the World Heavyweight Champion, Edge. An angry and beltless World Heavyweight Champion makes his way to the ring to take on his longtime rival – but still takes the time to pose with his pyro. Starting off, it’s a good back and forth chain wrestling match. Matt nailed a bulldog and went for the first cover of the match, to no avail. He makes an attempt at a Twist of Fate, but is denied – as are we for the next couple minutes as we head to a commercial.
Back from break, Matt has Edge backed into the corner. During the commercial, JR tells us, Edge was being evasive, perhaps injured off of Batista’s spear. That may be the case, because Matt Hardy is dominating, though I think I spoke too soon, as Edge managed to deliver snake-eyes to Matt on the top turnbuckle and take the advantage. I think Mick Foley said it best – Edge is like a shark who smells blood in the ocean, as he’s really become aggressive since taking control of this matchup. Matt battles out of a submission move and starts throwing fists, taking down Edge and getting a two count. He hits the Side Effect, and still only gets a two count on the World Champion. Matt goes for another bulldog but gets shoved into the corner, though he counters as Edge charges in. Hardy goes for a secondrope legdrop, but Edge moves, though Hardy adjusts mid-flight, lands on his feet, and hits a DDT for another two count. He goes for a moonsault, but Edge rolls out of the way. Edge goes for a spear, Hardy sidesteps, but Edge goes for a backslide with his feet on the ropes for two. Hardy goes for the Twist of Fate, gets shoved off, and almost into the referee, which causes enough of an opening for Edge to hit the spear for the hard fought victory!
Back from break, the Jeff Hardy video package set to “Rooftops” by Lostprophets airs. Interestinlgy enough, we found our younger cat on a rooftop, and as such, named him Whisper because of this video. Jeff Hardy will be coming to SmackDown next week. Meanwhile, we’ve already seen two RAW superstars and four ECW superstars. No wonder Jeff’s not on the show.
Speaking of ECW superstars, ECW Diva Kelly Kelly makes it five, as she’s teaming with Michelle McCool and… well, I guess we’re going to find out after the break.
Back from break, we find out that Kelly and Michelle are teaming with Cherry to take on Victoria, Maryse, and Natalya. We also hear that Melina fractured her ankle on Monday night during her tag match that sent JR to SmackDown and Michael Cole to RAW. Anyways, the match is back and forth until Natalya comes in and starts dominating Michelle McCool. Victoria comes in and gets a two count on Michelle off of a standing moonsault. Maryse gets the tag, and a one count of her own on a bodyslam. Michelle manages to tag Cherry who goes to work on Maryse. She gets a two count off of a neckbreaker. Natalya pulls Cherry off of the ropes while she’s pounding away on Maryse. All hell breaks loose, and in the confusion, Maryse rolls up Cherry and gets the win for her team. We’re still wondering who is going to take on Natalya for the SmackDown Women’s Championship on Sunday at Night of Champions.
Mr. Kennedy returns to SmackDown, next week.
Domino is in the ring, as the lights go out in the arena. Vladimir Koslov, the guy that put me to sleep last week, is Domino’s opponent. Domino’s not intimidated though, he tells Koslov he wants to see what he’s got. Domino put up a pretty decent fight here, even knocking Koslov down for a one count, but Koslov picked up the win with a headbutt to the ribs, the same move he put down Jamie Noble with last week. The referee pus up the X sign, signaling that Domino is injured. Pretend injured, I’d venture to sa, but we’ll see.
In the back, Rey Mysterio runs into Hornswoggle who gives him his hat and has him kick his heels. Hornswoggle gets his hat back, as Rey heads out to give his farewell address to the SmackDown fans.
After the break, Rey Mysterio makes his way out for his final appearance on Friday Night SmackDown. After taking time to pose for the fans, Rey tells us that six years ago he came to SmackDown with his head full of dreams and expectations, and that thanks to all of our support, he was able to become Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion, and World Champion. SmackDown will always have a place in his heart. He’s heading for competition on RAW. He invites us to accompany him on his journey to take down some of the greatest athletes on RAW. He wants us to help him accomplish his dreams on RAW. Then he speaks Spanish. I don’t, so I can’t tell you what he’s saying. He then poses on the ropes once again for the fans. Batista’s music hits, and he comes out with Edge’s World Heavyweight Championship as Rey is still in the ring. He hugs Rey Rey as we go to break.
Batista takes on Umaga – NEXT!
RAW Rebound: Batista and Edge crack skulls.
The Samoan Bulldozer, Umaga makes his way to the ring to take on Batista in a WrestleMania 24 rematch – a fact which thusfar tonight hasn’t been mentioned. These two start off brawling. Batista goes for a Batista Bomb early, but is unsuccessful. Umaga takes the upper hand in the match, which is a slow, methodical match. By which I mean, if I wasn’t sitting upright in a lighted room watching this, I’d probably have fallen asleep watching it by now. Batista moves out of the way of a big splash from Umaga, and takes control of the match with a couple of clotheslines in the corner. Batista calls for the Batista Bomb, only to be assulted by Hawkins and Ryder as Edge steals back his World Heavyweight Championship belt. Chavo comes to assult Batista as well, but Umaga backs them off Batista – because he wants to do the damage himself, apparently. He sits Batista up in the corner and runs ass first into him. La Familia holds down Batista for Umaga to go for a big splash – but he’s pulled off the top rope by Triple H! The WWE Champion and the number one contender for the World Heavyweight Championship clean house, ending with a Pedigree on Ryder and a Batista Bomb on Hawkins!
Night of Champions is this Sunday!
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