SmackDown review – 6/5/09By thinksojoe · · 4 Comments
Ah, the blue brand. I haven’t watched an entire episode of SmackDown since I’ve moved in to my new apartment, but I’ve been keeping up and am intrigued by the goings on. Ready? Let’s go!
I think this is actually the first time in a few weeks that my cable provider has actually shown the HD feed of SmackDown – for the last two weeks at least, it’s been the standard definition feed stretched to 16:9. Tonight it’s World Heavyweight Champion Edge vs. Intercontinental Champion Rey Mysterio, and CM Punk takes on Umaga, but first, there’s ladders everywhere – literally!
The World Heavyweight Champion heads to the ring, and it’s time for The Cutting Edge! Edge’s guest tonight is his opponent for this Sunday’s Extreme Rules pay-per-view event, the uniqe enigma Jeff Hardy. Jeff says that if Edge wants to speak with him, he’ll be “right up here,” climbing the ladder. He says he’s extremely comfortable with his surroundings right now, and that at Extreme Rules, he’ll be right at home on top of a ladder as the new World Heavyweight Champion. Edge says nothing makes him happier than to see an opponent with false bravado. Jeff forgets how dangerous the match will be. Every time he starts to climb the ladder on Sunday, he’ll be there to knock him back down. Maybe Jeff will give everybody a false sense of hope, and get almost to the top of the ladder, but Edge will knock him right back down. Then he’ll climb. He’ll climb to the top of the ladder and grab his World Heavyweight Championship, because no matter what match they have, the result is always the same. Jeff interrupts, he doesn’t care how good Edge thinks he is. People will talk about this ladder match forever. Jeff may be crazy at times, but he’s proud of who and what he is right now. So at Extreme Rules, living for the moment won’t be his downfall, it will be his salvation. Edge says that’s good, because this Sunday, he’ll need that salvation. Edge pops Hardy with the World Heavyweight Championship belt a couple of times, and kicks over his ladder, knocking the younger Hardy to the floor. The champion holds his belt up high as we see replays of Hardy’s fall from different angles. Edge takes off up the ramp while his Extreme Rules opponent lie on the arena floor.
So, for the benefit of those with short attention spaaaaaaaaaaaaaans: Before the break, Edge shoved Jeff Hardy from the top of a ladder. Here, watch it another four or five times!
Ain’t No Stoppin’ Me Nooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwww!
Shelton Benjamin has had his problems with John Morrison as of late, and he’s hoping to settle them tonight, as JoMo is once again his opponent.
John Morrison def. Shelton Benjamin
This is the kind of match you just can’t put into words. You have to kind of just kick back and appreciate the wrestling showcase put on by the two men who can legitamately claim to be the two best pure athletes in the company. In the end, it’s Morrison hitting the Starship Pain for the victory in this one.
Still to come, World Heavyweight Champion Edge vs. Intercontintental Champion Rey Mysterio, and CM Punk vs. Umaga, but up next, it’s Chris Jericho!
Last week, Jericho dressed up as the world’s oldest Rey Mysterio fan and beat the crap out of him, trying to steal his mask before Jeff Hardy rescued him.
Speaking of Jericho, he’s here right now, and ready for action! But first, he’s got something say. Rey Mysterio should be afraid, because in 48 hours, Chris Jericho, the true face of SmackDown will expose the true face of hypocricy when he tears off Rey Mysterio’s mask and exposes his identity to the world. He refuses to show his face to all the people who look up with him, but this Sunday, there are no rules, which means that Jericho will do whatever he needs to do to desecrate Mysterio and tear the mask off of his face. On top of that, he’ll beat Mysterio and become Intercontinental Champion for the 9th time, and there’s nothing anybody can do about it.
R-Truth has apparently finally been allowed into the locker room, because he makes his entrance down the aisle this week instead of through the crowd. He gets to the ring and asks Memphis, TN, “What’s up?” Then he asks Jericho the same question. Jericho is not amused. R-Truth wants to know what’s up? Jericho is going to tell him. How dare he interrupt Jericho. He can dance and sing like a puppet, but he will not try and upstage Jericho on his show. Jericho knows they have a match, but he’s not done with what he has to say. Truth tells him that he’s done, and done gonna get it. He wants the truth? Jericho’s the biggest hypocrite Truth’s ever seen in his life. Does he think he’s a thug? Because he talks down to the people, that makes him bad? He should quit playin’. He ain’t bad (he ain’t bad – HE AIN’T NOTHIN! HE AIN’T NOTHIN!). But things are about to get bad – and that’s the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth!
Chris Jericho def. R-Truth
Two more guys who have the potential to put on a hell of a match. It’s been so long since I’ve watched SmackDown that I’ve almost forgotten how talented the roster on this show is. Also, since I have an excuse to do so right now, I’d like to recommend Jericho’s book, “A Lion’s Tale: Around The World In Spandex” if you haven’t read it yet. In another entertaining match tonight, Jericho picked up the win in this one with a Codebreaker out of nowhere to score a pinfall.
As Jericho backed up the ramp, Rey Mysterio came from the back and assaulted his Extreme Rules opponent before being easily pulled off by two referees. Rey got away from them and dropped Jericho with a seated senton from the top of the stage.
Before the break, Rey Mysterio assaulted Chris Jericho.
CM Punk makes his way to the ring for his match with Umaga just two days before the Samoan Strap Match the two will have at Extreme Rules, as we see the events that led up to it over the past couple of weeks. Umaga hits the ring, strap in hand, and we’re ready for action.
CM Punk def. Umaga
Again, two great athletes. Umaga may not look like one, but he can go with the best of them. That said, Punk is a few steps faster than the Samoan Bulldozer, and uses that to his advantage in the early going before the…
When we come back, CM Punk is in control, but not for long, as Umaga turns things around on the outside of the ring. He goes for a pin, but pulls Punk’s shoulder off the mat at two, looking to further punish his Extreme Rules opponent. The Samoan Bulldozer not only shows off his power, but his submission skills as well. Punk finally starts to mount a comeback, dropping Umaga with a flying clothesline for a two count. He utilizes his Muai Thai background to strike and daze Umaga, but gets caught in mid air and slammed to the canvas. Umaga goes for the running ass to the face, but Punk moves out of the way. Punk goes for the knee/bulldog combination, but after the knee, he swats Punk away like a mosquito. Umaga goes to grab the strap, but as he’s being admonished by the referee, Punk knocks the strap out of his hand and drops Umaga with the GTS for the victory!
Still to come, Edge takes on Rey Mysterio.
JR and Todd Grisham are in the ring to run down the Extreme Rules card.
Maria makes her way out to referee the next match. It’s a six diva clusterf#*k tag team match. Out first is the team of WWE Women’s Champion Melina, Gail Kim, and Eve. They’re opponents are Michelle McCool, Layla, and Alicia Fox.
Michelle McCool, Alicia Fox & Layla def. Melina, Eve & Gail Kim
You know, for all the praise I’ve given this show tonight, I should’ve expected a throwaway match like this one. I didn’t pay a lot of attention to this one, but Maria got distracted at the end of the match, allowing Melina to be cheap-shotted by Michelle McCool, which led to Layla scoring the upset pin.
The Great Khali is in the ring with Ranjin Singh, and set for action. His opponent tonight would like to introduce himself. His name is Dolph Ziggler, and last month on SmackDown, he assaulted The Great Khali with a chair.
The Great Khali def. Dolph Ziggler
Ziggler is another great athlete on SmackDown. The Great Khali, not so much, but at his size, he doesn’t need to be. He can just toss his opponents around and strike them down with punches, chops, and headbutts. And that’s what the Punjabi Playboy does early in the match. Ziggler uses his speed to avoid some shots, but still takes a pretty bad beating at the hands of Khali. In the end, it’s the Punjabi Plunge from The Great Khali that puts away the young rising Superstar.
Earlier tonight, Edge shoved Jeff Hardy off of a ladder. Let’s watch it a few more times! Speaking of Edge, he’s in action against Rey Mysterio, NEXT!
WWE Hall of Famer Koko B. Ware is in the front row and doing the bird. The dance, I mean, not recreating Marilyn Manson’s Smells Like Children track “F*#k Frankie.”
Intercontinental Champion Rey Mysterio is set for action after his assault on Chris Jericho earlier. He’ll be taking on the World Heavyweight Champion, Edge!
Edge vs. Rey Mysterio
You know, if I were a luchador, and a guy was determined to take my mask off of me, I’d probably wear a full mask instead of one held on by a few straps in the back. Anyways, I digress. We’re back to quality wrestling here, with both men showing off their athleticism. It’s Mysterio in control as we go to…
Mysterio is still in control when we come back, but Edge finally starts to battle back. It becomes a back and forth matchup, very fast paced with a lot of near falls. Edge drops Mysterio flat on his face, and we hit up another…
Edge is in control as we come back this time, but JR tells us it’s been back and forth throughout the break with several near falls. Mysterio starts to fight back, dropping Edge with a facebuster, but he can’t take advantage right away. He pulls himself up to the top rope, but Edge gets up and catches him climbing. The World Champion goes for a superplex, but the Intercontinental Champion knocks him off the ropes and drops him with a hurricanrana. The action spills to the outside with both men struggling to get to their feet and beat the 10 count, which they do. Mysterio drops the dime on the Rated R Superstar, but only gets a two. Mysterio continues his offense, but gets caught with a Powerbomb when he goes for a springboard seated senton. Edge locks in the Sharpshooter, but Mysterio manages to get to the ropes. He battles back and goes for the 619, but Edge gets away. Mysterio tries again, but gets caught. Edge hits a backbreaker and goes for a second, but Mysterio flips out of it and rolls up Edge for two. He hits an enziguri, then drops Edge with a 619, but when he goes for a springboard splash, Edge moves out of the way and drops Mysterio with a spear for the win! What a match!
After the match, Edge pulls a ladder out from under the ring. He tosses it into the ring and looks to hit Mysterio with it, but Jeff Hardy makes the save with a steel chair before dropping Edge on the ladder with a Twist of Fate! Jeff sets up the ladder in the corner, climbs the ropes, and leapfrogs the ladder to legdrop Edge. Hardy grabs the World Heavyweight Championship and holds it high above his head. Hardy climbs a ladder with the belt as we fade to black.
My thoughts: This is what I’ve been missing over the past month or so? This show was great! There were a few throwaway matches, but most of the matches were pretty good. This Edge/Mysterio match should probably be remembered in December when we’re talking Match of the Year. I really enjoyed the show. Not too much talking, a lot of action, and great athletes to provide that action here on the blue brand.
Rey Mysterio. I know a lot of people don’t like the guy. The fact remains, however, that he’s a great athlete and he can pull in the casual fans. I have a friend who could care less about professional wrestling – a guy who once said that these guys aren’t real athletes because it’s not a real sport. He watches SmackDown every now and again with his young nephew, and he says that other than the WWE Divas, his favorite part of the show is watching Rey Mysterio in action. That’s how exciting Rey is, and while many of us may have been watching him for over a decade, he’s still an entertaining commoddity and very much worth having on the show.
Anyways guys, I’m out of here, off to watch “Don’t Forget The Lyrics” on my DVR before I head off to work. Look for a new column from me tomorrow, Random Randomness from JT on Sunday, and we’re looking to do something special for Extreme Rules this Sunday. Thanks for reading!
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Extra credit for the Michael Jackson reference. And the Manson reference.
Excellent review! Yes, this is what you've been missing. 🙂
I like Rey. I've almost always liked Rey. Every kid under the age of 16 that I have taught or met thinks that Rey is awesome. In fact, when I used a music video that showed (among other things) some of Alex Shelley's ROH moves, several kids shouted out that it was just like Rey Mysterio. Apparently, they honestly believe that Rey is the only wrestler in the world who can do certain things, and were shocked to learn otherwise. Hey, if it makes them watch, I'm ok with it.