Tag Archive: Dolph

  1. Raw Is Three Hours 4-23-12

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    We begin with the contract signing being set up. John Cena comes out talking to his favorite cameraman, and then Johnny Ace breaks up Brock’s music to tell Teddy Long that Brock isn’t in the building yet. Then Edge comes to the ring much to the enjoyment of the fans. Then Edge cuts the promo we’ve all been waiting for. That got the crowd chanting “Cena, Cena, Cena.” Every wrestler should have been huddled around the monitor watching it. That’s how it’s done.

    We get Jericho in all his glittery sparkliness. And then we got Kofi in all his Enhancement Talent to the Stars glory. Kofi was great. Dolph is the most under-appreciated wrestler in the WWE. But I think Kofi Kingston has to be the most under-appreciated babyface. This was a great match. I don’t use the word “great” very often, but this was everything you would think it could be.

    Johnny Ace names Eve something that gives her more dialogue. Ugh.

    They replayed the really excellent Brock promo. I fast-forwarded. I’m pretty sure he’s still an a**wipe.

    Jericho got CM Punk a liquor basket. Predictable.

    We got more R-Truth. May I say that R-Truth has quickly become my guilty pleasure in wrestling? He is going to fight The Sultan outfit, who is now being portrayed by the Hip Hop Hippo, Albert. I think they’re trying with Lord Tensai so I should give them credit. R-Truth got in some offense so it wasn’t a total squash. He did the green mist, which means I’m going to hear every “smart” wrestling fan argue that Albert stole that from Tajiri (when we all know he stole that from MsChif).

    Kane walks out wearing El Zorro’s mask. He cut the decent promo he always cuts. Then Randy Orton interrupts to show he has Kane’s father Paul Bearer bound and gagged in the back. He shoves him into a freezer. This is the second time he will be killed on tv. The two beat the living crap out of each other.

    Alex Riley tells Jericho that CM Punk is drinking alcohol in the back. Jericho follows him to crack open the door and sure enough, Punk is drinking from a Red Solo Cup. Jericho, I think you just looked like 1990 Sting.

    Alberto del Rio comes out to the best ring entrance in the WWE. He is teaming up with Cody Rhodes, I guess, because they both exist. And they are wrestling Big Show and Great Khali for the same reason. I think I need to say I am enjoying this phase of the Big Show’s career. Nothing will ever beat 1996 The Giant in my eyes, but I think the evolution of the Big Show is night and day. I think this was quite possibly the best match these 4 could have had.

    And just as I feared. They gave Eve dialogue. Punk can be suspended because he drank in a 12-hour period. I cannot even begin to describe how ridiculously insulting this is to my intelligence.

    Brock Lesnar annihilates Josh Matthews.

    We’re supposed to have Beth Phoenix vs. a Bella. And because the divas do nothing, they make it a Lumberjill match. It was actually not a bad match. They gave the women some time and they used it well. The Bella won.

    We got to watch CM Punk take a field sobriety test. It was everything you’d expect. According to the cop in the ring, Punk failed the sobriety test. Then Punk had to give the belt to Punk to give to Teddy. And then Punk recited the alphabet live. We even got a Ric Flair strut. Not my favorite thing but I will live.

    Sheamus got Mark Henry. And Daniel Bryan was named special guest referee. The crowd is going rather nuts for him. It was a short match with Sheamus being pinned by Mark Henry with a (lightning) fast count. This night has been GREAT build-up for Extreme Rules.

    Primo and Epico are wrestling Zack Ryder and Santino because they exist too. This was another pretty good match. Ryder and Santino won. So I guess tag champ makes you first jobber.

    Kane takes Paul Bearer out of the freezer to put him back in. So now he can kill him just like his brother did.

    Abraham Washington gives his card to the Latino 3.

    Funkasaurus and Hornswoggle took on Jack Swagger and Dolph Ziggler. It wasn’t a bad match.

    Then there was the contract signing which went on forever.

    A really good Raw again. Work was first-rate. Matches seemed a little fresh.

  3. Smackdown 03/09/12

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    As the road to WrestleMania continues, tonight John Laurinaitis is taking over control of Smackdown. And with that, we can only expect madness, chaos, and certainly not Drew McIntyre… because he was fired. Or was he? Only time will tell, so let’s hop to it… shall we?
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  4. Raw Is Not Elmo 1-23-12

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    As I write this, I am watching Elmo’s World. I am a good father and that is what a good father does. She has been since put to bed. Now I am watching 2 Broke Girls wondering what will come next to the wrestling fans. Last week, we had one of the best endings to Raw since Punk’s “The Promo.” Now it’s time to see how the WWE will follow up with it.

    Raw began with Punk doing what he does best. Sitting cross-legged in the ring with a microphone in his hand. He said that he wanted to hear Johnny Ace say all the things to Punk’s face. Then John Cena came out and said he wanted Kane tonight and Ryder to get his rematch. Cena had some great fire and intensity. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to admit. But I am beginning not to hate Johnny Ace as a character.

    The first match was John Cena & CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler & Jack Swagger. It was a really decent match. You had the face in peril and then Ziggler won via a handful of tights.

    Chris Jericho played with the crowd. This is one of the best new things about Raw.

    Mick Foley gave Zack Ryder a pep talk and Cena offered Ryder his back. Ryder said he wanted to do this on his own. Ryder took quite the beating. If you want to see this match done much better, click here and watch Icarus vs. Gregory Iron. It was a great moment for Ryder. Kane is over like a monster, and Ryder got lots of sympathy for it. Ryder got a lot of  chants in the show. As they were putting Ryder in the ambulance, Eve Torres auditions to be the worst human being ever by telling Cena this was all his fault. But the winner was Josh Matthews who tried to interview John Cena. John Cena gave his angry face at the camera which looked like a Vince snarl.

    Sheamus wrestled Jinder Mahal. I would like Mahal to never appear on my tv. They’re building up the Royal Rumble.

    Miz and Truth are wrestling tonight. Do they understand what it means to wait for something for a PPV?

    Brodus Clay killed Heath Slater.

    Miz and Truth wrestled a good match I didn’t want to see because they should be waiting for a PPV.

    Johnny Ace is told his job is going to be evaluated by Triple H. Surprise, surprise. Ace didn’t wrestle. It was Otunga, whom Punk killed faster than I mute the tv when Jennifer Hudson’s commercials come on.

    Another good Raw tonight. I really liked the build-up towards the PPV. The Punk-Ace stuff is evolving into good. Clay continues to be a great new gimmick and surprise. This has been a pretty solid Raw.

  5. Raw Is Perez Hilton? 1-16-12

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    For some reason Perez Hilton is polluting my Monday Night Raw. I personally think he has no place on our planet or in our species. Last week Kane laid out Zack Ryder because he couldn’t change a flat tire. Maybe Hilton can show Ryder how to change a flat tire. Things could be a lot worse though. We had the Funkasaurus debut last Monday and I’m curious to see where that goes. I’m also curious to see what Jericho does tonight. If you are looking for some great tires check out these Tire Shops for great deals.

    We start off with Mick Foley. The great part about Mick Foley is that he can laugh at himself. Foley will be in the Royal Rumble. I will only be happy if he takes Jinder Mahal’s spot. Then he is interrupted by Vickie Guerrero and Dolph Ziggler berating him for taking a wrestler’s spot. And then CM Punk comes out they have a nice face off. And then Johnny Ace comes out. He says he will be impartial. True story. My wife was passed out on the couch. When Johnny Ace came out, she groaned in her sleep.

    We get footage of the tag belts changing hands. We had a nice match between the Colons &  (6 if you count Rosa Mendes. Some of you may have to think about this a little).

    Chris Jericho will be in the main event. He turns out the light and lets his jacket sparkle.

    Then we do a recap of Zack Ryder being unable to change a flat tire. Eve will accompany him to ringside. Ryder must have a member the size of Long Island cause I can’t think of any reason for Eve to still be with him after the “unable to change a flat tire” thing. Swagger destroyed Ryder and won the title.

    In the back, Johnny Ace apologizes to Zack Ryder because he wasn’t medically cleared. Then Eve gets in his face and Ace tells her to respect authority. Huh?

    R-Truth comes out and Wade Barrett interrupts him. Then after Barrett is done with his monologue, R-Truth begins his comments with ” ‘Allo, Govnuh.” Then there was a silly look at R-Truth’s trip to Disney. I hate to admit it, but I liked it. Then Miz came out followed by Sheamus. Teddy made a 4-man Over the Top Battle Royal match. R-Truth won. Nice match.

    Then Jack Swagger comes out and he’s going to face John Cena? This was never a match. It was just a beatdown. This John Cena had some fire. Then Kane told Cena he was embracing the hate. Interesting.

    We then had Brodus Clay kill JTG. Next to him is the chick whose second favorite match is Clay-Hawkins. I don’t know if this is right, but Funkasaurus is probably the best thing on Raw tonight.

    Daniel Bryan cut a nice promo about why Big Show is a horrible person. The great part is that Bryan was a heel who told the truth. I really liked that.

    The main event was really good. Jericho got tagged in, soaked up the adoration of the crowd and then walked off. Mark Henry chased Daniel Bryan to the back. And to make up for the missing person, Mick Foley came out. After the faces won, Johnny Ace came out and reversed the decision. Punk laid in to Ace about being pathetic and then walked off. Then Foley had a great face-off with Ace where Ace snapped. I had never seen Ace show that much fire before.

    This turned out to be a really good Raw. I need more like these.

  6. Raw Is Making Me Yearn For Dragon Gate 12-5-11

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    Sources are now saying WWE is working on their network and is planning on launching it the day of Wrestlemania. So if you think Twitter, has been pushed down our throats, get ready. You have seen nothing yet.

    Last night, I got to finish my first Dragon Gate USA match and had my life irrevocably changed. Something tells me things are going to seem worse because I have watched a match that will now be in my top 20 of all time. I also had the chance to see a really fun MPX show this weekend, so I’m still reeling off that. Maybe tonight I will watch wrestling as a diversion, which is exactly what it should be. If it’s painful, I may find myself going on Twitter and mocking it with my “tweeps.” Sometimes that makes it more entertaining than the show itself. I guess it’s because I do love wrestling so much that I want WWE to succeed and be good.

    Sorry for my rant. Here is Monday Night Raw.

    We start off with John Cena. The crowd is pretty mixed for him. Cena cut a pretty decent promo. And then we had Alberto Del Rio interrupt him. And then Cena went into 10-year-old-kid at the playground mode. Alberto Del Rio have footage of why he deserved a title shot. Then Vickie Guerrero interrupted the promo. Dolph Ziggler is in the main event mix? Cena tried to have a certain edge in his promo. It just sounded like a 10-year-old trying to cuss. Then the Miz came out. I hate to say this, but Miz’ swagger showed that the other three were not on his level. I liked the edgier direction they took this promo. Then Johnny Ace took the mic and could barely remember his lines. Then Ace set up Miz-Randy Orton.

    Randy Orton vs. Miz was a pretty decent match. It had a good intensity. Wade Barrett came out and distracted Orton when Miz slithered back into the ring to get the win by countout. Made Miz look good without Orton losing. I’m liking Orton’s work, which is a compliment since I don’t really like him. I’m also liking the Orton-Barrett feud.

    Zack Ryder is talking to Johnny Ace about how great the WWE Network looks. I guess a human being wasn’t available.  Then John Cena shows up shilling some merchandise. Johnny Ace makes a match. Zack Ryder vs. John Cena. Ryder gets a US title shot if he wins. Cena gets into the title match if he wins. Interesting.

    David Otunga tells Kevin Nash he will face HHH in a ladder match with a sledgehammer. I think Viscera would have a better ladder match than Kevin Nash. And now Kevin Nash gets to destroy some upstart’s career.

    We got Del Rio vs. Daniel Bryan. It wasn’t much of a match. Bryan was still coming off his rib injury so he was out to do the glorified job. I don’t think he lost too much.

    We got Eve & Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix & Nattie. It is nice to know we haven’t seen that match before (<-sarcasm font). My wife heckled their work. That’s bad.

    Then we got John Cena vs. Zack Ryder. I’m intrigued to see where this will go. John Cena beat him without killing him too badly. So the WWE is going to work on building John Cena by having him beat the most popular wrestler in the company.

    John Cena had a lot of fire for his backstage promo with Johnny Ace. He gave up his title shot for Zack Ryder to get another chance. That is a good step in rebuilding John Cena.

    Zack Ryder got Mark Henry. Ouch. Ryder sold like Shawn Michaels. Then John Cena comes out and does an Attitude Adjustment and has Ryder cover Henry. Strange. Ryder beat Henry but was not put over.

    Nash walked down to the ring in record time. He killed Santino.

    For the main event, I got Dolph Ziggler-Sheamus. Ryder interfered and Sheamus ended up getting the win. In some ways I think Dolph Ziggler is this generation’s Mr. Perfect. And that is NOT a name I use lightly.

    Then there was a contract signing. CM Punk came out and cut some major promos. Miz has so much fire. The fans are rejecting Alberto Del Rio. Then there was some major battling that went on.

    All in all… Pretty decent Raw. I like the edgy inside stuff. They seemed to be focused.

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  7. Smackdown 11/18/11: A.J. Didn’t Really Need That Spine Anyways….

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    Wow, today was really long. Getting called back to the night job after getting home made things unnessarily longer, so getting to Smackdown so late is not bode well for my FFW button. Nonetheless, I have been enjoying this program over all other programs (barring ROH), and it is the go home show before Survivor Series… so let’s hop to it, shall we?
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  8. Raw is Hunter 7-25-11

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    Last week, we saw one of the weirdest, most bizarre changes in wrestling history. Tonight, there seems to be a new era, the real-life McMahon-Helmsley era, if you will. Questions abound. Who will become champion? Will Alberto del Rio cash in Money in the Bank? Will we see Zack Ryder? Who will Mark Henry sideline? Will we ever see Sin Cara again? Will my wife bring me home my drink from Sonic? (She did, btw.)

    The signature opens up. How do they have time for Ultimate Warrior? Are they proud of him? Really? (<—— Miz voice) No wonder CM Punk wants to quit.

    Whyyyyy in the blue hellllllllll (<——– Rock voice) is the championship match kicking off a Raw? I liked the wrestlers watching in the back. These two had a really good match. Rey and Miz had really nice chemistry together. And then, in a move that surprised absolutely no one, Alberto del Rio came in to cash in his Money in the Bank. Rey let ADR know that he was ready when he did a plancha onto ADR. ADR changed his mind and took his briefcase and went to the back. We all saw ADR cashing it in, but not cowering out.

    Vince McMahon on commentary used to drive “Anything can happen in the WWF” down our throats worse than Rocky Maivia. I feel like we’re getting to that place again.

    Then we get a nice recap featuring a champagne bath featuring Zack Ryder. And then they cut to John Cena who shook his hand. Don’t worry, John. You’ll get it back in no time.

    Then we have Dolph Ziggler versus Evan Bourne. (My wife likes Evan Bourne, so she stayed awake during this match.) Commentary was strong during this match. Lawler made Bourne seem important. This was a really strong match. It got over Ziggler and the sleeper hold. And I don’t think Bourne lost anything by losing here.

    Keith Stone is once again on my tv. This is not acceptable. Maryse & Melina vs. Kelly Kelly & Eve Torres. I am liking Eve more and more. And Maryse is sexy. This is quite possibly the worst match on Raw I have seen in some time. I’m just happier that this match got longer than the Keith Stone segment.

    R-Truth is talking to Triple-H. Back from the commercial break, Triple-H is in the ring. This feels important. This monologue gives me what I need to browse some Ring of Honor and WWE and MPX (Buy a $Payday$ t-shirt. Just because I said so.) t-shirts. I loved the swerve of us thinking CM Punk was coming out and getting Jim Ross instead. Though I gotta admit. The moment I hear the snare drums, I think of Roddy Piper. Then Cole cut a promo. HHH gave him the rest of the night off as an announcer. But not as a wrestler. Cole had a match next. Then R-Truth got the hottest segment of the night. HHH got to channel his old DX self. “Are you talking to me or are you talking to these other guys?” R-Truth does the psycho eyes better than anybody else. HHH watches R-Truth walk away and lets him know HHH re-signed somebody else-John Morrison.

    Then Michael Cole came out to the ring in Triple-H’s music. And his opponent… Zack Ryder. In the span of a minute, my Twitter timeline had 16 comments about Zack Ryder. It was worse than the diva match, but in Cole’s defense, he’s not a wrestler. The crowd went nuts. It was nice. Please tell me they are going to use him.

    We had a Kofi-Alberto del Rio match. Kofi is such an incredible athlete. Aside from Rey, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a luchador adjust to the WWE in-ring style as well as del Rio. The finish was really strong. Kofi almost had del Rio down for the pin. Kofi had an injured arm and tapped out because of the injury and looked pretty strong even after a loss.

    HHH will be on Smackdown! The exclamation point is there because it’s on the name, not because I’m enthused.

    My tv does not need to be adjusted. Jim Ross is supposed to be there. Who has an “Add Jim Ross” on their settings? Maybe he can do commentary on General Hospital. “Stone Cold! Stone Cold!” regarding Jason. (I’m married. Don’t judge me.)

    Miz is not happy. A champion needs a face. And, in a cheap plug worthy of DX, Miz will be on The George Lopez Show on Wednesday. Something tells me Miz may NOT be the focal point of that show, as it most likely will be crashed. Then Rey comes out to face the Confederate Warrior. The crowd really is in to John Cena. Maybe they’re in Charleston, SC. I heard the Confederacy was big there. While I can mock them all I want, this was a hot crowd. Cena and Rey fought a really good match. I really had no idea who was going to win this one. Watching Cena win made me a little sick, but then Punk’s music hit and he has new music. They had a nice stare-down with their belts.

    All in all, this was such a good Raw. There are things I didn’t like. I didn’t like Cena winning the belt. I didn’t like the divas segment/match. But all the rest of the matches were great.  (I’m not counting Ryder-Cole as a match.) It was undpredictable, fun, and it sounds like they are listening to us.

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  9. Raw Is… A Tournament? 7-18-11

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    Vince is walking to the ring (wearing a hideous coat with a color that does not exist in nature) with Johnny Ace in tow (whom I have decided is now mute). CM Punk is ingrateful. There will be an 8-Man Tournament for the championship. John Cena is fired. Tonight will be a night of epic proportions. Will this be a WWE night of epic proportions or will this be TNA’s huge announcement that turns out to be Shark Boy’s evening dinner.

    The first match was Miz vs. Alex Riley. Alex Riley is coming along nicely. Miz got the win so I was happy to see that. Miz has been through a lot in the past few weeks in his knee and has done a great job of selling his injuries from last night. Miz ended up with the win so he can lose in the next round and not lose anything.

    We were treated to Jack Swagger and R-Truth. The crowd could care less about this match. So could I while watching it. While everybody was so in love with King of the Ring, I wasn’t. The only reason I cared about the results was because it was a launching pad for a lot of careers. I’m not the biggest fan of tournaments (except for ECWA’s Super 8).

    Then we got Alberto del Rio vs. Kofi Kingston. And the return of Ricardo Rodriguez, the man with the best hair in the WWE. They had a really exciting match that got the crowd going for a little. Kofi Kingston is slowly becoming one of the top babyfaces on Raw. Kofi came out of nowhere to pin Alberto del Rio. This was the highlight of the night up to this point. (And then it plummeted very quickly as my wife discovered Wikipedia and started giving me the life story of Alberto del Rio. But you already knew that.)

    At the point they were interviewing Kofi Kingston, I knew he was getting attacked. And then he didn’t get attacked. Is Kofi getting a rocket strapped to him? Rey-Dolph started out really well. My wife once again ruined wrestling for me by comparing Vicki Guerrero to Carol Burnett. They fought a really good match with Rey picking up the victory.

    They did a 14-diva match. There were 28 reasons to watch this match. I don’t think this match lasted 28 seconds. It was long enough for me to swoon for A. J. and wish Sara del Rey was here.

    Then we got Kofi and Miz. This match was really good and we had a bloody smile from Miz. I found myself asking if Kofi was really going to win it. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen one of those matches on a Monday Night Raw. If Miz wins this tournament, I don’t see how he can still be a heel. Maybe that’s what they’re doing.

    We found time for an Andy Leavine video package. They need to do more of these. Give me a reason to care about these guys. Then we got Rey vs. R-Truth. This should make a pretty good feud because R-Truth hate the “Little Jimmies” and Rey does everything he can for them. The guys are great athletes and would feed off of each other really well. (Break from Raw: The cops in the Twix commercial crack me up every time.) The two fought such a great match with such intense drama. The crowd really got into it as well.

    I knew the finals of their tournament wasn’t going to be this week. I thought we would have had to wait til Summerslam. If they had just been up front with us, we would have been fine. I just can’t but feel it was bait ‘n’ switch. Vince introduced Cena. Cena made a reference to “Kevin [Dunn].” So we’re still keeping with the shooting. I like this Cena. He made sense and was rational. “I will walk on somebody else’s show, Brother.” HHH came out and Vince introduced his son-in-law, HHH. Trips is now “The Corporate Game.” HHH is now taking over the day-to-day operations. So Vince is relieved of his duties (with tears).

    This Raw was a pretty good disappointment. The only reason is we didn’t get CM Punk. Punk hasn’t gone anywhere yet. He’s building up plenty of buzz for himself and the company. Some people like tournaments. I don’t. But I think the crowd did a good job of building up their momentum. I hated the ending angle. This is typical of the past 10 years. Anything that has gotten hot, the McMahons have tried to insert themselves into it. Looks like my timeline really liked it, but I hated it. I am curious to see where it goes from here.

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  10. Random Randomness

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    Well I’m back here for another week of what’s going on in the world of whatever, whenever, whomever, wherever, whyever and however. (Wow I can’t believe I just wrote that!)  Lets hope I can remember everything that I wanted to talk about: (more…)