We start Impact Invasion with a wonderful involvement of a cluster fudge clip reel inter-cutting various movies 4,5,6 and 1 with last weeks Bischoff family drama. But lets start the show with a Bully Ray in ring promo.
Meesa Approve.
After being abandoned by his partner, Roode, he wants some answers. Not even allowing Roode’s music to finish before they take it to the ring.
To do some more…talking. Until the real culprit behind their Fleetwood Mac split reveals himself. Steve Borden comes out with his trademark UK special Cricket Bat. He tells the heels to get ready for a tag match against James Storm and….(J Hardy can’t leave the states because of his parole) The Insane Icon, Sting. Ta Ta for now.
So sad you couldn't be here these past two weeks.
The continuing story of Kramer vs Kramer err AJ, Daniels fight over Kazarian continues as we have a one on one bout between the aforementioned parents. After a pretty solid match Daniels wins with brass nucks handed him by a reluctant Kaz.
Gunner and Bisch senior plan infanticid. Where is Mrs. Bischoff? Women are very protective of their children. Would make a better story.
Samoa Joe and Magnus step out next to raucous applause. While under Magnus’ music, of course. And Mag’s cuts a wonderful promo proving (hopefully to Bischoff) that he is the total package. All that comes to an end when the UK heels Morgan and Crimson come to the ring to brawl which comes to an end when joe pulls Magnus from the ring before flippin the bird.
Good showing
Next we have the neglected crown jewel of TNA the X Division. And its a three way between Shelley, Williams and Champ Austin Aries in a non-title bout. This is another strong showing from all competitors where we see Douglas going to the top rope for a flying European uppercut and various outside maneuevers. It finishes when after kicking Williams in the nuts following the chaos theory on Shelley, Aries goes for the brainbuster but is out smarted with slice bread. Giving the match to Alex Shelley in a long overdue rivialry.
In the back Hulk Hogan warns Steve Borden about having a target on his back. And to look out.
But to outside where Gail is beating on Tara. The scene jumps back to Tara taking pictures of the UK, which are interrupted by champ Kim. Bringing the fight full circle. Even with fair fight from Tara the winner after throwing thro a set of doors is Gail who mockingly brags her title and name to Wonder Years.
Hogan and Bischoff Junior are up next. After a HH endorsement we have a interruption by Bischoff Sr. and Gunner. Hilarity ensues. After a brawl Hogan highhandedly beats both Gunner and Bisch Sr. before letting Jr. get a punch in on his dad. Sad. OH AND Bully Ray and Roode argue before there match.
Hardcore Country Mickie James vs Velvet Sky where we watch Mickie slowly go heel due to no title win? What comes across as a decent match ends with a miscalculation by James leading to a win for Velvet.
Even glorified strippers win over Hardcore Country 🙁
Welcome to The Main Event: or See ya in 3 days, Champ! -Bully Ray
the crowd was hot for the faces as they took the champ and ray to task. Sting eventually clears the ring after double splashing Ray/Roode in the corner. Roode eventually dropping on Ray’s manhood. The Insane Icon S Drops Roode before locking in the scorpion deathlock. Ray comes in to interfere but says the above quote with belt in hand. Roode submits as Ray looks on.
The Star Wars promos didn’t overshadow the show because besides the opening montage and Taz being Taz mentioning princess Leila? and the minute response from Tenay the show was still good all around. Here’s to the upcoming pay per view, Against All Odds and a return back to the iMPACT Zone. The ends the no vowel edition of pntnr iMPACT Review.
Hey folks, ThinkSoJoE here, for a rare SmackDown review. I think it’s been a while since I’ve actually made it through an episode, and I’ve already hit play, so let’s go!
Last week: Dolph Ziggler lost his Intercontinental title to Kofi Kingston, immediately lost his rematch, and then turned everything around by winning a Fatal Four Way match to determine the No. 1 Contender for Edge’s World Heavyweight Championship. Give the assist to Vickie Guerrero who, in Teddy Long’s absence, inserted her boyfriend into the bout at the last minute. Tonight, will we see repercussions of Vickie’s invasive ways? Elsewhere on the program, Big Show seeks revenge on Wade Barrett, who made a surprise appearance on the show (and whose elbow made a lasting impression on… the Show. See what I did there, guys? Show? Big Show? Yeah…? Okay, that was terrible. Let’s pretend it never happened.)
It’s two weeks ‘til the Royal Rumble! I am very excited. The Rumble has been my favourite event since I was a wee boy. Even if the overall match isn’t great, every Rumble has at least a couple of classic moments. The big question is – who will win this year? Alberto Del Rio seems pretty confident about headlining WrestleMania, but I hope we get a curveball instead. Anyway, on with the show…
Speaking of Del Rio, he kicks off tonight’s show with an in-ring promo. In short, he says it’s his destiny to win the Royal Rumble and become the new ‘Mr. WrestleMania’. R-Truth soon interrupts. He says that Alberto won’t win the Royal Rumble match because he has fancy cars, or his own ‘creepy’ ring announcer. At one point, he calls Alberto, ‘Lucy’. I’m guessing that’s some sort of US television reference that I don’t get. Another interruption; this time courtesy of Dashing Cody Rhodes. He gives his own speech about how he’s going to win the Rumble and, sure enough, we get another interruption as Rey Mysterio’s music hits. Rey gives his usual spiel about fighting the odds and such. He mentions that Alberto Del Rio hasn’t won a Royal Rumble, which is a moot point seeing as Del Rio hasn’t even been in the WWE for a year! Maybe I’m taking this too seriously… Cody Rhodes has a great comeback, saying that Rey’s Rumble win ‘is so 2006.’ The four men end up brawling, before Teddy Long’s music inevitably hits. He announces that Alberto Del Rio and Cody Rhodes will take on R-Truth and Rey Mysterio… next.
Rey Mysterio/R-Truth vs. Alberto Del Rio/Cody Rhodes: There’s not much to write home about in this match, so let’s skip ahead to everyone’s favourite part, the Obligatory Tag Match Breakdown Time™! R-Truth makes the hot tag to Rey, who bounds in and starts laying into Cody Rhodes. Rey hits a Sunset Flip, but Del Rio breaks up the count with a dropkick. R-Truth takes him out of the equation, only to be thrown over the top rope by Rhodes. Rey sets up and hits the 619, follows with a splash, and picks up the win. Pretty standard match with a predictable ending. Ho hum, etc.
Your winners: Rey Mysterio/R-Truth
During the ad break, we’re treated to a ‘Did You Know?’ which states that the WWE has been granting wishes for the Make-A-Wish foundation since 1982, ‘before the entire cast of Jersey Shore was even born.’ Boy, check out WWE, being all hip and current and… dope. Do kids still say ‘dope’?
Speaking of which, it’s time for another edition of ‘Str8 Outta Brooklyn with JTG.’ Let’s just move on swiftly, shall we?
Wade Barrett is backstage, being interviewed by Todd Grisham. I always feel a pang of guilt when I see Todd backstage on SmackDown!; as if I’m cheating on him by listening to the commentary of others, and he cries himself to sleep at night whilst clutching an announcer’s headset close to his chest. Anyway, Barrett vows to take Big Show down tonight. We’re then treated to a frankly terrifying hype video for Ezekiel Jackson’s impending return to SmackDown!. Scary stuff.
Drew McIntyre vs. Trent Baretta: Hey, it’s Trent Baretta! He’s okay! He wastes no time, going for McIntyre before the Sinister Scotsman has even managed to step through the ropes. His offensive flurry is short-lived, however; Drew is soon slamming the former Dudebuster’s face into the announce desk and even backhands him in the face! How rude. Baretta eventually gets a small reprieve, but the crowd don’t seem interested in getting behind him, which is a shame. In fact, some members of the crowd actually cheer when McIntyre signals for the end with a ‘thumbs down’. Drew picks up Baretta and goes to dump him over the ropes, but Baretta counters into a pin and gets the 3-count! Holy crap, didn’t see that coming! Drew McIntyre is furious.
Your winner: Trent Baretta
We return from an ad break to see Trent Baretta walking backstage. Drew McIntyre jumps him, but the Scotsman’s attack is soon halted by the appearance of Kelly Kelly. He tries to plea his case, but she screams at him to grow up and storms off.
Big Show vs. Wade Barrett: Barrett’s music is pretty dreadful. It’s some sort of pseudo-electro-rock track. Hopefully he’ll get a better one soon. Big Show makes several attempts to take out Wade with a Chokeslam, but the Englishman keeps finding ways to evade. The final attempt sees Show thwarted by… Heath Slater! The ref calls for the bell as Justin Gabriel runs into the ring as well. I guess that explains where Gabriel and Slater ran off to after they turned their backs on CM Punk’s initiation over on RAW… All of a sudden, Ezekiel Jackson appears. For some reason, this sends Michael Cole into a frenzy, calling Jackson’s appearance ‘insane’, as if it was Ric Flair or Sting who had just shown up, as opposed to an actual WWE roster member who is due to return from injury. Jackson and Big Show have a stare down, which allows the former Nexus members to attack Show from behind. Who will Jackson side with? Big Show punches a steel chair out of Justin Gabriel’s hand, then turns around and is taken down by Ezekiel Jackson’s clothesline. Everyone starts kicking into Big Show – I guess that means Jackson is aligned with Barrett, Slater and Gabriel. Zeke lifts Big Show up and hits a powerslam, as Matt Striker announces that ‘SmackDown! may never be the same again.’ Gabriel provides the exclamation point with his 450 Splash, and this new faction (I’m guessing I can call them a faction?) celebrate their domination over Big Show. I have just one thing to say about all of this: please change the music…
Your winner (not that anyone’s interested in that at this point): Big Show via DQ
Michelle McCool vs. Beth Phoenix: McCool immediately targets Beth’s rehabilitated left knee. Beth eventually manages to fight back, and hits an awesome springboard suplex. I never get tired of that move. Beth sets up the Glam Slam, but Michelle manages to roll through. She gets a 2-count, then Beth counters into a pin attempt of her own and steals the 3.
Your winner: Beth Phoenix
Backstage, Dolph and Vickie are reconciling after tensions arose between them last week. The end result is an extended Eskimo kiss. That would have been cute if we replaced Vickie with someone else. I have a few suggestions, but I’ll go ahead and keep those to myself…
Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger: Josh Mathews thanks the WWE Universe for making last week the most-watched SmackDown! ever on SyFy. Is it possible that spoilers regarding Dolph’s push were partially responsible? I’m gonna blindly presume ‘yes,’ and not question anything, because I’m a big fanboy and don’t like to listen to reason. Anyway, Kofi has a mic and says he’s proud to once again be Intercontinental champ. He doesn’t get much further, because Jack Swagger’s music hits. Swagger’s not as fun without his Soaring Eagle. I’m still certain that the Eagle will make a Rumble appearance, by the way. I’d bet money on it. This match was back-and-forth, but Kofi eventually managed to hit the SOS and get the pinfall victory.
Your winner: Kofi Kingston
It’s time for Cutting Edge. The Rated R SOOOOperstar introduces Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero. As they approach the ring, Michael Cole confirms that Ziggler’s match with Edge will take place at the Royal Rumble. Sweet. This segment contains its fair share of ‘Vickie is fat and ugly’ jokes. We’ve heard it all before, so I’ll spare you the details. Ziggler says when Vickie and Edge first got together all those years back, Vickie resuscitated Edge’s entire career; at the Rumble, Dolph is gonna pull the plug and watch it flatline. Nice terminology there. Vickie shows a clip from back in July 2008 – remember when Alicia Fox was Edge and Vickie’s wedding planner, and Edge got his smooch on with her? That was back when I first started watching wrestling regularly again. Holy crap. Feels like a lifetime ago! SmackDown! has aged me, ladies and gentlemen. I’m an old soul now; just like those chaps from Inception… Edge accepts that cheating is a terrible thing, but counters that he has a clip of his own to roll. This one shows Dolph and Kaitlyn (remember her?) kissing backstage during Season 3 of NXT… Uh oh. Edge starts to rub the salt in, but Ziggler snaps and starts beating him down. Edge responds with a big boot, which sends Ziggler to the outside. Vickie gives Edge a few slaps to the face, but the champ chooses to walk away. He steps through the ropes, and Vickie starts cackling about how untouchable she is. Edge’s expression changes, and he slowly gets back into the ring. It looks like he’s going to Spear Vickie, but Dolph sweeps his legs and drags him to the outside. He sets Edge up, then hits a Zigzag, sending Edge’s head and neck slamming into the steel steps. Vickie joins Dolph at ringside, stands over Edge’s body, and plants a big kiss on her boyfriend. Yeuch.
That’s all for this week! Make sure to check make next time for more SmackDown! goodness. Cheers!
Here we go again, same old sh*t again with another week gone by and quite a few random things happening this week in the world as I see it. Well without further interruption, let’s get this show on the road: (more…)
