We open with a look back at last weeks RAW, when the Big Show left John Cena laying in the ring.
Michale Cole reminds us that this is show#997 and in three weeks we make it to show 1000! Lawler and Cole remind us that Money in The Bank is two weeks away.
Cena makes his entrance and the crowd goes wild (yea.) Cole and Lawler remind us Cena will be in his first ever MiTB ladder match with Show, Kane and Jericho.
Cena COULD come down vowing to turn into some vengful manimal like Dr. Johnathon Chase, but NOOOOO. He wants to THANK Show/Jericho. Jericho said Cena needed to prepare for anything that can happen. Last week was a crash course in Mitb. You have no friends, only enimies. Cena needs to be prepared for everything, from giants, singers, tables, ladders, chairs, monsters, to flying bodyparts. He promises two things will happen after MiTB…
1. Show will go home an empty handed sewage baby.
2. Cena will cash in the MiTB contract to become WWE champion.
Cue Daniel Bryan: YES! YES! YES!
Bryan didn’t even realize Cena was out there. Cena isn’t relevant to him. Wait, that’s not entirely true, because after MiTB, Bryan will be the new WWE champion; and if Cena does get the contract, he will be the first to cash it in and lose. Cena can think of at least one person who disagrees.
Cue CM Punk:
Actually John, Puk can think of a lot more than that.
Does He disagree w/Daniel? Yes!
Does John disagree w/Daniel? Yes!
Does Jerry Lawler disagree w/Daniel? YES!
Does the guy selling popcorn disagree w/Daniel? YES!
So does the crowd, and Punk leads the “YES” chant until Bryan demands someone come up with an original thought. Punk reminds Bryan that AJ will be guest ref for their title match, and will count his shoulders down for three. How’s that for original?
Punk turns to Cena and says if he wins MiTB, it’ll be down to him and Punk again.
Cue JERICHO!
That’s not an original thought Punk, here’s one; you’re still a wannabe. Punk tells Bryan not to worry about people stealing catch-phrases, it happens to him all the time.
“No offense, Mr. Best in the world.” – Jericho
“None taken, Mr. Bon Jovi.” CM Punk
He suggests Bryan try using more than one catch-phrase. Bryan tries to interupt but…
“Will You Please SHUT THE HELL UP!” – Jericho
“And let me welcome you to RAW IS JERICHO!” -Jericho
“And after tonight, none of you in this ring will ever… EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHVAH, be the same agayn.” – Jericho
Since Jericho INVENTED this match, he’s going to win it, and dares anyone to tell him otherwise.
Cue Kane
“Otherwise” – Kane
WELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL it’s the Big Show!
Cena gets ready for Show, Bryan gets him from the back, and a huge but quick brawl ends with Big Show standing.
COMMERCIAL
DID YOU KNOW? When MNR made it’s debut in 1993:
KIm Kardashian – 12 yrs old
Rihanna – 4
Miley Cyrus – 2 months
Beiber – NOT BORN YET.
Me – Just waiting to die.
Chrlie Sheen will be special guest celebrity social media ambassador. #SheenGetsRaw.
PRIME TIME PLAYERS/DAVID OTUNGA/CODY RHODES vs. KOFI KINGSTON/R-TRUTH/U.S. CHAMPION SANTINO MORELLA/INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION CHRISTIAN
Basic 8 man tag with a few highspots by Kofi. We have a standoff on the outside as we go to
COMMERCIAL
We come back with Cody in control while AW cheers on his clients with his headset set for all to hear. Kofi tags in Santino who owns Otunga. AW pulls his men out of the match and call it a night. Then CODY bails on Otunga while Brodus Clay makes his way out. Everyone gets a turn tossing Otunga back into the ring, and Santion scores a COBRA! for a three count.
After a killswitch/splash combo on Otunga, we get the obligatory dance party w/kiddies and the girls.
Backstage, ALBERTO DEL RRRRRRRRRRRRRIO tries to score brownie points w/tonights interm GM Teddy Long. He tries to convince Teddy to make him no.1 contender again. Long was “axed” by the Board Of Directors to tell him they already have. Teddy made a decision of his own, to book Del Rio in a match tonight. Against who? It’s a “Teddy Long Surprise.”
COMMERCIAL
Stephanies favorite RAW recollection; her father training for the Royal Rumble during his fued w/Austin.
Cole thanks us for making RAW the longest running show in history, Lawler reminds us that on 07/23, the show goes three hours.
In the ring at this time is Ricardo Rodriguez to introduce ALBERTO DEL RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRIO! ADR comes out in an expensive car as the fans chant… something less than nice (I guess) at him.
Teddy’s surprise? SIN CARA! But ADR has a surprise of his own, a running knee to the head in the middle of Cara’s entrance.
Del Rio beats Sin Cara down and gives him the arm breaker on the outside. Del Rio leaves him lying with a smirk on his face as ring personel run to his ade.
Backstage: Bryan tries to make up w/AJ and offers her a single red rose as a peace offering. AJ calls him on his bs and promises to win her match tonight and run off into the arms of who the WWE universe sees as her “soulmate.” The bit ends with AJ BITING THE HEAD OFF THE ROSE and giving Bryan back the stem.
When we come back from commercial, Paul Heyman will be with us via satellite to answer Triple H’s challenge to Brock Lesnar.
COMMERCIAL
We’re back, looking at the unfolding drama between Brock Lesnar and Triple H. We see the promos from last month that end with Heyman getting laid out.
Heyman is with us LIVE via Satellite. Cole asks him will Lesnar face Triple H at SummerSlam? Heyman announces Lesnar will personally respond… in three weeks at RAW 1000. Heyman claims Triple H wants to face Lesnar at SummerSlam so he can go out “on his shield” “in a blaze of glory,” and focus on his life outside the ring. Heyman adds if the match happens…
“It’ll be a mercy killing.” – Pail Heyman
Up Next: Sheamus/AJ vs. Dolph Ziggler/Vicki Guerro
COMMERCIAL
Slam of The Week: Last week on Smackdown, Ziggler and Vicki argue, it ends w/Vicki slapping Dolph.
EXCUSE ME! Vicki introduces herself as “the most captivating, irresistable, charismatic diva to ever grace the grand stage of WWE, QUEEN DIVA – Vicki Guerrero!” She then introduces Ziggler and they make their way to the ring.
MIXED TAG MATCH: ZIGGLER/VICKI vs. AJ/SHEAMUS
We get a recap of AJ getting voted by WWE.com into a special guest ref spot at MiTB, in the Punk/Bryan WWE title match.
Sheamus is out and we get the match started. AJ goes after Vicki, but Sheamus puts her out and calms her down.
The match is pretty much what we’ve already seen so far between these two, set on fast foward. Sheamus gets set for the Brouge kick, but Ziggler tags out. Sheamus kicks Dolph out of the picture (litterally,) and AJ wraps it up with a “shining wizard” knee-lift for the three. AJ leads the crowd in a “YES” chant, and heads backstage.
AJ finds Punk on the phone and pesters him until he hangs up. She wants to know what Punk thought of her match, but Punk’s been on the phone for the last 15 minutes, he missed it. AJ leaves, hurt.
COMMERCIAL
We come back with Heath Slater in the ring. We get a montage of Slater being humiliated for the past three weeks by returning legends. Slater says that’s not funny. He is not a clown!
Cue…
DOINK THE CLOWN!
Seriously, DOINK THE CLOWN!
It’s a brief, by the numbers match, but it ends with A WIN FOR SLATER!
Cue Diamond Dallas Page:
Page and Slater trade pleasantries and handshakes, until Page hits the Diamond Cutter on Slater.
We get a promo for NO HOLDS BARRED, on DVD for the first time ever tomorrow.
Up Next: Kane Vs. Big Show, NO DQ!
COMMERCIAL
We come back with a video package of Cena and Alicia Fox visiting recovering troops at Walter Reed Hospital and talking up the troops.
Promo for MiTB
NO DQ: KANE VS. BIG SHOW
The match is just a slow, dull brawl. Kane and Show hit a few rough looking spots, until Show ends it with a chokeslam on a chair to Kane. Show does sell a shoulder injury, but I can’t tell if it’s legit.
Backstage: Eve is back! She tries to butter up Teddy, but just gets a name-tag for her trouble. She comes across AJ, and recomends she leave head-games to the “grown-ups” and do “what little girls do best,” and go cry in the corner. AJ gets that look in her eyes, and runs down all the options Eve has used up, promising she’ll show her how to get attention.
COMMERCIAL
Alberto Del Rio’s most memorible monday night moment? The night De-generation X “invaded” WCW.
TENSAI (w/Sakamoto) vs. TYSON KIDD
Both men will be in the MiTB match for the World’s championship contract. Tensai beats Kidd into the corner but misses a charge, and Kidd gets a schoolboy FOR A THREE COUNT!
The match is less than a minute, and Tyson gets the win! Tensai takes it out on Sakamoto and leaves him laying.
Backstage: Bryan and Jericho attempts to make nice end in shots at each others jackets and a duel of catchphrases.
Cena and Punk discuss strategy as well. Johny C agrees to listen to Punk and follow his lead. Punk doesn’t look convinced.
COMMERCIAL
Back from the break, Tyson Kidd is talking bout his big win… until Tensai jumps him from behind and beats him wihout mercy.
CHRIS JERICHO/DANIEL BRYAN vs.JOHN CENA/CM PUNK
Jericho walks out wearing the most expensive jacket he has EHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHVAH worn, according to Jerry Lawler. Bryan, Punk and Cena each get their entrances, and we’re off.
The match starts out with Punk tossing Bryan around, tag to Cena who muscles Bryan out of the ring. Jericho tags in. He and Cena play it cautious, sizing each other up. Cena shoulder-blocks Jericho off the ring, into the guard rail as we go to commercial.
COMMERCIAL
We come back w/Cena trying to fight out of the enemy corner. Jericho takes over on Cena, wearing him down. Jericho misses a lion-sault, and tags in Bryan, who kicks away at Cena in the corner. Tag to Jericho, Cena (maybe) botches a suplex attempt, and Jericho stays in control, until Cena shoves Jericho chest first into the corner. Both men make a hot tag, and Punk unloads on Bryan. Cena and Jericho take it to the back, while Punk and Bryan trade kicks and jumps. Punk scores a superplex just as AJ comes out. Punk and Bryan are too busy trading shots to notice her, so AJ pulls out a table from under the ring.
AJ sets up the table on the outside, and climbs to the top rope. She looks like she’s having second thoughts. Bryan gets between her and the table to try and stop her. Punk climbs up to talk her down.
AJ plants a big kiss on Punk, AND SHOVES HIM OFF THE ROPES! Punk lands on Bryan, taking them both through the table.
RAW ends with the WWE champion and his top challenger, layed out, while a 98 lbs. girl laughs at them both.
So that’s it for tonight. Laer this week, I will attempt to bring you a recap of each match with move by move detail (no promises.) Till next time, peace and chicken grease.
ThinkSoJoE and G return for another week of BWF Radio! Lots to talk about this week including the usual RAW, SmackDown, and Impact broadcasts, plus the debuts of NXT Season 6 and the brand new pro wrestling web show, The Underground. In the news, TNA’s BaseBrawl events, more on Ken Doane on Cena & Orton, Jericho’s return, WWE’s stock prices, more on TNA and Scott Steiner, Lanny Poffo on his brother’s Hall of Fame status, potential RAW GMs, the whereabouts of Eric Young, John Laurinaitis’ WWE schedule, and more! All this, plus a quick rundown of this week’s IWC Power Poll! Tune in via the link below!
Our Celebration of Professional Wrestling continues!
In the annals of Wrestlemania history, Wrestlemania 18 in particular holds a very dear place in my heart. The reason is simple: I WAS THERE. Among the 68,237 people that packed the Skydome I experienced Rock vs Hogan first hand, helpless against a wave of mass nostalgia. But I’ll get to that match later. We had floor seats, just left of the main hard camera view toward the back. Good seats but maybe not great seats. But that didn’t matter; I was in attendance at the Showcase of the Immortals, the Granddaddy of them all, Wrestlemania!
The following comes to the BWF courtesy of Jonkind over at Wonderpod-Online
Our Celebration of Professional Wrestling continues!
Earlier this year over at Wonderpod-Online, Bruce McGee and PatMan created a new theme of podcast for our site. PatMan and I decided to continue the series with a conversation reminiscing about our experience growing up in Calgary, the “Hart”land of the Stampede Wrestling promotion. What a perfect way for two old smarks to contribute to the ongoing festivities and celebration of professional wrestling going on at Wonderpod-Online and the Bored Wrestling Fan? (more…)
As the wind blows and the snow falls down, I have to wonder, it was 60 degrees here yesterday, wtf? Well I guess thats weather in JTland. But as the race-car drivers get ready to drive in circles for hours on end and the NBA prepares for it’s all-star game, let us not forget that there is still a lot going on in this world we have here plus Screamfest is tonight: (more…)
Welcome everybody to a (kinda) special edition of Random Randomness. Today’s edition will be in two parts with part 1 being a shorter than normal Random Randomness and part two be a shortened edition of the Night Of Champions Roundtable featuring myself and Gee. So without further ado, lets get this show on the road:
I didn’t post this last night because I really wasn’t that excited about RAW. Anyway, I won’t be posting on next week until Tuesday, maybe Wednesday. I’m not going to be watching RAW. I’m joining my mother and grandmother to go see a show. I’m excited. Anyway, here’s the review!
The Main Event is Cena & Bret Hart vs Jericho & Edge with Nexus as Lumerjacks!
Bret Hart comes out in a Batman shirt and says that he’s upset that Jericho and Edge left and talks about Team WWE. He asks Jericho and Edge to join him in the ring, and says that if Nexus wins at SummerSlam, then everyone loses. Jericho makes his way to the ring, and Bret asks him to rejoin Team WWE, because this is Jericho’s time to make things right. Jericho still refuses, and tells Bret that Bret’s worried about losing tonight, and is frightened. Once again, Bret is screwed. Chris doesn’t want to team with either Cena or Bret, he just wants to dismantle Bret.
You think you know me…
Edge comes out and asks Jericho what’s wrong with him, they grew up idolizing him. Edge says he’s in, goes to attack Hart, Hart goes for Sharpshooter, Jericho pokes him in the eye. Jericho and Edge make their way out of the ring, and Natalya joins Bret in the ring. Nexus is backstage beating up Tyson and David Hart Smith. Wade says it’s not Bret’s day. Bret and Nat leave the rign and run backstage.
<COMMERCIAL>
@KeepItFiveStar “That’s what you get for not being a Hart, Tyson!” – Nexus
@dasharpshooters Michael Keaton looks like shit. #wwe #raw #bwf
@Niki_Sushi I want Bret to say ‘nut up or shut up’ so Chris can shove the mic in his mouth. #BWF
Medics are backstage with Hart Dynasty, Bret says he’s going to take things under his own hands. Cena stops him and tells him to stay with his family.
AWESOME!!!
United States Champion and Mister Money in the Bank The Miz vs Evan Bourne
Miz wins with a Skull Crushing Finale, but Evan had some great offense going, and a pretty sweet looking hurricanrana. United States Champion The Miz wins via pinfall!
Miz gets mic and says he doesn’t care who has the WWE Championship after SummerSlam, when he’s ready to cash in, he will be the WWE Champion, because he’s the Miz and he’s AWESOME. Backstage, Cena is talking to Khali backstage.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog Yeah, The Miz just murdered Evan Bourne.
@_MFS_ Bourne does shit like that and yet they still make him job… #WWE #RAW #BWF
@JCenadotcom Cole talking about The Miz requires me to mute the channel…
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Melina’s return.>
Melina vs. Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox
Not a horrible match, but I wasn’t all that impressed. Melina wins via pinfall.
Khali is backstage with Josh and says that Ranjin Singh’s not here. Josh asks is Khali with WWE or Nexus? Khali says WWE, then jacks the mic and grumbles and mumbles a lot. He then challenges Wade Barrett to a match, said Josh… thankfully
<COMMERCIAL>
@RAWMysteryGM I know what Khali said and he will be punished accordingly for that outburst #WWE #bwf
@ KeepItFiveStar So The Great Khali vs. Glade Berry…?
@ _MFS_ what the fuck was that move supposed to be Alicia cause it looked like absolute shit #WWE #RAW #BWF
@redsandman99 I’m hoping that since Melina won tonight, Alicia wins at Summerslam. I love Melina but there should be proper feud for the title.
@dasharpshooters Dammit Khali you have been in this company for like 4 years and you cant speak english? #wwe #raw #BWF
As a result of Melina’s victory, Alicia will defend against Melina at SummerSlam.
Later tonight, Eve & Gail v Bellas v Maryse and Jillain in some bathing suit match thing, and Sheamus has called out Orton.
Chris Jericho and Edge are backstage complaining about Bret. They say if Nexus loses, it’s because they’re not on Team WWE, and they may have bitten off more than they can chew. Edge says they’ll survive whatever Nexus does, and Jericho says they’re architects and they make things happen. If they take out Cena and Hart, there’s no SummerSlam match, and they’re in the clear.
JoMo and R-Truth talking backstage. They say they got each other’s backs, but they need to find a replacement.
Mark Henry comes up and hears them say they need replacements, they just need him instead of two replacements, and to consider this match his audition. Nexus is watching on a big TV, and Wade nods to them. Everyone but Barrett leaves Nexus locker room.
<COMMERCIAL>
@YourBoyDrew Tweets are being swallowed, it’s like the Bella Twins, are operating twitter for me
@iwcmvp WWEShop.com has an interesting new item. For $35 Michael Tarver will come to your house and make you crap your pants in fear #WWE #RAW #BWF
Ted DiBiase with Maryse vs. Mark Henry
Henry’s attacked by Nexus before anything can happen.
Sheamus makes his way to the ring.
<COMMERCIAL>
@KeepItFiveStar Every week, we should place bets to see how long Mark Henry lasts before he gets his ass beat
@JCenadotcom Henry failed the audition then…
@Niki_Sushi Nexus is doin’ drive-by’s now!
@Bruce412 RIP Mark Henry #TeamNexus #WWE #bwf
@dasharpshooters Wait a minute there was a guy walking next to Maryse? I didnt notice. #wwe #Raw #bwf
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Randy Orton def. United States Champion The Miz>
It’s a shame that they lost their heads…
Sheamus to the ring. Mark Henry’s still trying to make it up the ramp, that fatass. Anyway, Sheamus says Randy is talking out his arse, and shows a video package of how he’s not afraid of Randy Orton.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Sheamus’ destruction>
Who thinks he’s afraid of Orton? Everyone. Sheamus says he’s afraid of no one (except Nexus… <.<; ) and that he wants to call out Orton. Randy comes out and interrupts him. Orton has something to say first – Sheamus didn’t get in the ring because he was afraid last week. Sheamus blew an opportunity last week, and he’ll do the same at SummerSlam. Sheamus can do whatever he wants, but fact is Sheamus has never beaten Orton. Orton says he’s not Triple H or Cena. Sheamus says he’s not the WWE Champion either, and he won’t be after SummerSlam, and when he beats Orton, Orton will go back to the end of the line, and Orton’ll never get another title chance. Orton says he will beat Sheamus because Sheamus has never beaten Orton, but if Sheamus wants to redeem himself for not attacking last week, Orton says do something about it.
Sheamus, your title matches in the past have been marred with outside interference. Therefore, if anyone interferes in the WWE Champ match at SummerSlam, they will be suspended indefinitely. Furthermore, I agree with Sheamus. If Randy loses at SummerSlam, there will be no rematch, and he will go back to the end of the line. However, I also agree with Orton. If Sheamus is not scared, then I encourage him to do something about it, right now.
Sheamus goes to walk away, goes to attack Orton, stops, then walks away. Orton attacks instead, Sheamus runs the title into Orton’s face. Sheamus goes for boot, Orton dodges, and delivers a backbreaker to Sheamus. Sheamus is down, Randy backs up, then goes for a punt, but stops short. Sheamus is freaked. Orton rolls out and picks up the Championship
<COMMERCIAL>
@iwcmvp “What the hell, why is that jar of Mayo doing with the WWE title?, MMMMMMM Mayo” – Mark Henry #WWE #BWF
@dasharpshooters Mystery GM should get 2 minutes in the penalty box for instigating. #wwe #raw #bwf
@TheViperRKO951 I think Sheamus just craped himself #RAW
@SinisterAsh What will happen if the GM gets a virus?
@Niki_Sushi One day, the lights will blink and the power won’t come back on.
@KeepItFiveStar “IT’S A SHAMEFUL THING! LOBSTER HEAD!!!!”
@ThingsColeSays TOO MANY LIMES, TOO MANY LIMES!
Sheamus is still outside the ring, very pissed off. The Season Two NXT Rookies are in action, and I don’t care.
Three NXT Rookies vs Three NXT Rookies
Uh… The fat one won. O.o Husky Harris. NXT Rookies win via squishing pinfall.
Sheamus attacks Rookies afterward, hitting the High Cross on Kaval. He then takes a mic and says that it was a message to the GM and Orton, and he promises to still be the WWE Champion next week.
Truth and Morrison make their way to the ring
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog Hey you know when this would be a good idea? Tomorrow night on NXT, but I guess we have kegs to carry and fat people to kiss then.
@kickoutblog Sheamus just did to NXT what I wish I could do to whoever is booking this show
@bojeeB Kool Aid man has died, Miracle Whip has lost his cool….
R-Truth and John Morrison vs. William Regal and Zack Ryder
I don’t know what happened… I was tweeting. R-Truth and John Morrison win via pinfall.
<COMMERCIAL>
@wnwdotcom: Big win? They squashed two of the most irrelevant workers on the Raw roster!
@ThingsColeSays Since they couldn’t get Will Ferrall, the Bellas walk to the ring with their giant dildos. They will get off one way or another!
@KeepItFiveStar The fans don’t like you R-Truth. They like rap beats and being asked questions.
@iwcmvp Was I the only one who thought that red haired woman in the audience during Truth’s entrance was Heath Slater? #WWE #BWF
@RAWMysteryGM Coming up next The Bikini Contest, featuring surprise entrant Mae Young. Get the lotion ready folks, there will be some tuggin going on #BWF
Nikki and Brie Bella vs Eve Torres and Gail Kim vs Maryse and Jillian Hall
Don’t know, don’t care what happened here. Point is, they were all in bathing suits, and that is the only reason that this was even on. The entrance with the slide was dumb, and Santino and Vladimir couldn’t even save this… Okay, Santino did. I love that guy. The Bellas win via crap ring work.
Tamina corners, so to speak, Santino, and then let’s him go, but slaps his ass as he walks by. Santion acts kind of embarrassed.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: The Monty loses to Big Boss Man at SummerSlam>
Khali on his way to ring, but is attacked by Nexus. Everyone saw this coming.
<COMMERCIAL>
@dasharpshooters Whats up with the PG swim wear? Fucking Lame #wwe #raw #bwf
@iwcmvp Santino and Kozlov look like human bottles of ketchup and mustard #WWE #RAW #BWF
@SinisterAsh Bella Twins winning matches make me want to punch a dry wall
@bethsharae Does this mean Khali is out too? I’m crossing my fingers… #Raw
@kickoutblog Weird how those two second backstage assaults are so much more devastating than an actual wrestling match. >_>
@TKeep123 Tamina wants a big old slice of Santino pie! Sweet! Must be the Uni-brow! Beware the Cobra! #WWE #RAW #BWF
Wade says that he was just informed that there will be no Khali vs Barrett match. Nexus will write a new chapter in the WWE after SummerSlam, and after they win at SummerSlam, the balance of power will shift dramatically and permanently. Nexus will beat Team WWE. Skip says they’re going to break Team WWE physically and mentally. Otunga says if anyone in the locker room is considering joining Team WWE, think about what they’ve done tonight, because you’re either Nexus or you’re against us.
Bret and Cena make their way to the ring and Miz comes up. Miz says their team’s in trouble, and they need help. He figures it was just a matter of time before they went looking for him, and he says he wants to hear them ask him to join their team. Bret says fine and asks if he’s in or out. Miz says he wants to hear it from both of them. Cena asks if he’s in or out, and Miz revels in Cena asking him for help before he says he’ll let them know Sunday. Cena says it’s a shame that they may need him.
<COMMERCIAL>
@TKeep123 Something tells me that 3/4 of the Nexus … have no idea what a Nexus is! #WWE #RAW #BWF
@kickoutblog Eat_Souls.MichaelTarver
@kickoutblog Michael Tarver was not given a microphone because if Sacramento heard his true voice, their heads would explode.
@IAmJHPunk Is Bret gonna wrestle in a Batman shirt? #wwe #raw #bwf
Next week Justin Long guest hosts RAW.
John Cena and Bret Hart vs Chris Jericho and Edge with Nexus as Lumberjacks
Cena tossed out, Nexus goes crazy. Jericho tossed out, Nexus doesn’t seem to give a shit, until Jericho hits Barrett by accident, and then Edge tries to help, Bret drags Gabriel in, Barrett drags him out. Nexus takes out Edge and Jericho, Morrison and Truth join Bret and Cena, Nexus gets in the ring. Edge and Jericho back away, then seem to debate whether or not to go back in the ring. Finally, Jericho and Edge rejoin Team WWE. Short brawl between Team WWE and Nexus. Nexus flees best they can, and Team WWE chases then out into the stands
Alright. I’m going to say it. Overall, not a great RAW. The best parts of RAW were the very first match, The Miz vs Evan Bourne, and then Randy Orton and Sheamus’ segment. I admit, the main event got better at the end, building the hype up by making Jericho and Edge return, but the rest of it? Total shit. Just sayin’. See everyone in a week, I hope! If I can’t get to RAW before Tuesday, then it’ll be two weeks! Ciao, darlings!
What’s up everyone?! I’m on vacation in Chicago with @Niki_Sushi, as a birthday present to us, but I’m still gonna review RAW! No idea how well this is going to go, but I’m going to do my best, alright? Why’m I still going to do this review? No rest for the wicked.
Now that Cena has gathered a team to do battle with Nexus at SummerSlam, how is the shift in balance going to play out on RAW? And what about Mister Money in the Bank? Is he going to cash in on RAW, or is he going to save his opportunity until he sees the champion down at SummerSlam??
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Last week: Nexus meets Team Cena.>
BRRRRRRRRRRR MONKEY POO!!!!
Cena makes his way to the ring. One day, he’ll realize that orange isn’t his color, I’m hoping. And he stands there… and stands there… And says everything’s better in Texas. Seven weeks ago, Nexus attacked and took over RAW with no warning. Superstars, commentators, cameramen, the Chairman, Hall of Famers, no one was safe. They did it for reasons only they knew. The point is, if Nexus wanted you hurt, you got hurt. Until last Monday. RAW finally said they have had enough. Friends and enemies stood side by side in the ring with one common goal: to beat Nexus at SummerSlam. You will see that they are not invincible. It’s about time, because the more they terrorize, the more power they get. And with power comes great responsibili-I mean influence. With more influence, they’ll start to take out the show. He’s not saying it’s going to be easy, he’s not Superman, he sees himself more as Aquaman. Jericho and Edge aren’t Batman and Robin. The idea of Khali walking around like Wonder Woman is just wrong. Cena photoshopped it, and it was very very disturbing. Every person on team Cena was chosen for a reason, and at SummerSlam-
BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!
I love Jericho… especially in a tux. Just sayin.
Cena points out Jericho is on the SummerSlam team. The crowd has a Y2J chant going, and Jericho looks a little confused. He says that he was standing backstage, biding his time, counting the minutes until Cena said what Jericho knew he would say. “My team.” “John Cena’s Team.” All week long, people have been approaching Jericho, saying they’re happy he’s on Cena’s team, and has changed his ways. Jericho wants to make something clear: He didn’t get involved to be a part of Cena’s team, to bask in the glory of a hero, or to shamelessly pander to a group of parasites. He got involved because of his personal problems with Nexus and Barrett, a man he molded from the moment he first came into the company. Jericho knows Barrett and Nexus, therefore he’s more qualified, and this is Jericho’s team. Cena says fine, and the team is sold to Jericho, at a bargain price. Call them whatever he wants. He doesn’t care; he just wants to beat Nexus. Jericho tells Cena not to patronize him. He will be honest and clear: the team lives or dies by Jericho. Cena knocks the mic out of Jericho’s hand, and Jericho looks ready to either run or smack a Sunkist bitch.
Cena says it ain’t about Jericho. It’s not about him. It’s about the damn business. Nexus has taken over the company. Last week, they got Jericho, they got Cena, whatever they want. Jericho loves the business, and that’s why they’re doing it. Does Jericho understand what Cena is saying to him right now? They have to co-exist. Yes, he knows Barrett better than anyone. Jericho is essential to the team. Jericho picks up the mic again and tells Cena never to knock the mic out of his hand again. Second of all, Jericho knows how essential he is. More than that, he sees the big picture. Nexus isn’t the only threat to the company. The other threat is John Cena. Because Cena is more like Nexus than he thinks. He walks around, interrupting whoever he wants, doing what he wants to do. The only difference is he does it with the support of the WWE Universe. Jericho is warning Cena: As soon as Nexus is gone, he’s going to take the next logical step, and turn his sights on Cena. He’ll either do it with his team’s help, or he’ll do it himself. Cena says he’s standing right there, take your best shot.
You’ve got mail!
Cena threw his hat. “Cena, Jericho. Your match against the Nexus at SummerSlam will now be an Elimination Match. The team that eliminates all the members of the opposing team first will be victorious. And in a preview of SummerSlam, the Nexus will face seven RAW superstars in an elimination match tonight. Your match at SummerSlam is all about teamwork. Tonight, let’s see how you, John, and you, Chris, function as a team against opponents of my choosing. And if you’re not down with that, I’ve got two words for you.”
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi The LOOK on @IAmJericho’s face is ‘I’m being cheered for. I do not approve.’ #BWF #RAW
@SadieandCompany Good grief folks, hold onto your socks. HBK is not in the house tonight. Sigh… #WWE #BWF
@RAWMysteryGM I don’t trust Cole to get me food, it’ll probably be moldy. He loves the Vintage thing RT @Tommyspud: @RAWMysteryGM ‘Get me a pizza’
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Last week, R-Truth interrupts The Miz’ attempt to cash in Money in the Bank.>
It’s a shame that they lost their heads…
Sheamus makes his way to the ring, and Jerry says he is what the future of the WWE is all about. He sits down next to Jerry Lawler.
I hear voices in my head, they council me, they understand, they talk to me…
Randy Orton vs. Jey Uso with Jimmy Uso and Tamina
Last week, Orton won a triple threat match between Jericho, himself, and Edge to get the title of Number One Contender for the WWE Championship at SummerSlam.
Looks like the Usos are starting to really get up here if they get to fight Randy. Anyway, I’m kind of interested in this match. The two lock up, and Uso gets a hit to the face that takes him down. Orton keeps the momentum, punching Uso in the side of the head before getting Uso under the bottom rope, and dropping him up into it. Orton then pulls Uso to the apron by his hair. Uso pulls Orton’s head down on the rope, however, and then manages to keep Orton down for a cover, but Orton kicks out at two. He gets Orton in a headlock, but Orton stands up and powers out. The two exchange blows before Orton gets the advantage with a couple of clotheslines, and then a scoop slam. Jimmy Uso tries to help, but Orton gets him. Orton then DDTs Jey off of the second rope, and Randy gets riled up, slamming on the mat, and hitting the RKO. He goes for the cover, and secures a victory.
Randy Orton wins via pinfall!
Orton paid too much attention to Sheamus, and Jimmy Uso attacked him. Orton begins to attack back, and Sheamus sneaks in. Orton ducks an attempted kick to the face from Sheamus, and then RKO’s Sheamus.
AWESOME!
Miz runs out there with a referee behind him, and cashes in the Money in the Bank contract.
The Miz vs WWE Champion Sheamus for the WWE Championship
However, before the match can even begin, Randy RKOs The Miz, and it seriously looks like Randy just mouthed ‘mother FUCKER’.
Edge is backstage, talking, saying he can’t wait for SummerSlam. However, he wishes Ted was on his team instead of Khali. Cena comes to Edge and says he has an unstoppable unit, but Khali? Khali’s clumsy, uncoordinated, and not that bright. Maryse says that they don’t understand him, but Edge doesn’t look like he understood her. Ted says neither Khali nor Morrison deserve to be there. Edge says if he has to, he’ll force Cena’s hand and take Khali out himself. As he walks away, he passes Ranjin Singh.
<COMMERCIAL>
@TKeep123 …and this could go on for a year! :} RT @markjamesbrand: Poor Miz. Thwarted again.
@Niki_Sushi ‘WWE’ is #9 trending in Chicago! #BWF #RAWSheamus and Miz are still in the ring, yelling at one another.
You’ve got mail!
“I found the team that will challenge Chris Jericho and John Cena tonight. The United States Champion The Miz, and the WWE Champion Sheamus.”
I just noticed, the briefcase is dented. Probably from beating Sheamus in the head with it.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Honkytonk Man vs. Ultimate Warrior for the Intercontinental Championship.>
Backstage, Edge is on the phone and Khali starts yelling at him. Ranjin says he heard earlier what Edge said, and he told Khali. Edge claims he never said that, and that he has nothing but the utmost respect for Khali. Khali grumbles something, or spits it, and it apparently translated to Edge is a nincompoop, and challenges him to a match right now. Khali manages to say: YOU! ME! NOW!, which is just plan dirty. Edge says fine. But if Edge wins, Khali is off the team.
<COMMERCIAL>
@HitTheRopes “I received another manager from the general email.” — Michael Cole. LOL #WWE
@RAWMysteryGM Cole screwed up my E-mail, I will replace him with Byron Saxton starting next week #WWE
@Niki_Sushi Well, Edge is gonna get a Great Fist up his ass and a pinky and index through his eyeballs. #BWF #RAW
The Great Khali vs. Edge
Khali comes out, and everyone’s dancing, and I’m so sick of that dance it’s not even funny. Lawler is gone because he’s going to be part of the seven-on-seven tag team elimination match later tonight. I hope Striker comes back on commentary.
Khali starts towards Edge, but Edge moves. Edge is then thrown into a turnbuckle, and Khali licks his han- okay, not really. He smacks Edge in the chest, and then manhandles him a bunch, throwing him into the opposite turn buckle. Edge gets up and manages to punch Khali a couple times, and then Khali clotheslines him, trying a leg drop and missing as Edge rolls away. Nexus makes their way out to the ring, and Edge climbs out of the ring, and into the crowd. Nexus surrounds the ring. Khali’s glaring at Nexus, and they make their way into the ring. They move away, creating an opening for him by the ramp. Khali cautiously gets out of the ring, and he backs up the ramp.
Later tonight, it’s John Cena and Chris Jericho against United States Champion The Miz and WWE Champion Sheamus. However, before that, it’s the seven-on-seven elimination match. I saw Yoshi Tatsu, the Hart Dynasty, Evan Bourne, Mark Henry, and Jerry Lawler.
<COMMERCIAL>
@BrdWrstlngFn Why did the GM choose to torment us by having Michael Cole on commentary by himself?
@HitTheRopes Dammit Edge, if you allowed the Nexus to beat you up, you would have won by DQ and Khali would have been off the team. #wwe
Seven-on-Seven Tag Team Elimination Match
Team RAW vs Team Nexus
Yoshi Tatsu, Jerry “The King” Lawler, Goldust, David Hart Smith, Tyson Kidd, Mark Henry, and Evan Bourne vs. Darren Young, Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Michael Tarver, Heath Slater, Skip Sheffield, and David Otunga
Tarver and Yoshi start out, and Tarver gets the upper hand, throwing Yoshi into the turnbuckle. Tatsu runs at him, but Tarver scoop slams him, and eliminates him.
Yoshi Tatsu Eliminated by Michael Tarver.
Evan Bourne takes over against Tarver, and Tarver keeps an advantage, tagging in Justin Gabriel. Tarver was holding Bourne back, but Bourne used it to his advantage. He then tagged in Lawler. Lawler goes for a cover, but Gabriel kicks out at two. Barrett pulls Gabriel out, and they begin to work out a plan.
<COMMERCIAL>
@seraphalexiel Why did Tyson send Nattie to the back? She can handle the Nexus. And I don’t like seeing Jerry in the ring
@Niki_Sushi ‘VINTAGE LAWLER!’ You know what’ll be vintage? Your life when I figure out how to morph through TVs, Cole. Wait for it. #BWF #RAW
@SadieandCompany Love Jerry Lawler’s “Wonder Woman” outfit! He’s still fabulous!! #WWE #BWF
@ IAmJHPunk Dammit Bourne vs Gabriel would have been great! #wwe #raw #bwf
Jerry Lawler was eliminated during the break by Heath Slater, which is sad, but oh well. Tyson Kidd is in the ring now, and Heath Slater is taking a beating. The ref gets Tyson off Heath, and then tags in David Hart Smith. Smith kept him up in the air for a while before finally dropping him in a suplex, and then went for the cover, but Slater kicked out at two. Smith keeps the advantage, getting Slater down in the corner before Irish Whipping him into the opposite turnbuckle. Slater gets up on the top rope, and Smith gets distracted by Gabriel. Slater hits Smith from behind, and eliminates him.
David Hart Smith eliminated by Heath Slater.
Goldust is in now, and Slater get s quick advantage, but Goldust hits a shoulder block before slapping Slater around. Slater tags in Otunga. Goldust gets momentum, but Young holds his ankle and lets Otunga get an opportunity.
Goldust eliminated by David Otunga.
Mark Henry comes in and lifts Otunga before dropping him. Henry then throws Otunga into the turnbuckle, and Slater is tagged in. Slater is thrown around by Henry, who then hurls him across the ring again. Slater then tags in Young, who is clotheslined as soon as he comes in. Henry then hits a boot that actually hurts both me and @Niki_Sushi. Sheffield comes in and the two get in a yelling match for a minute. Sheffield then hits some blows on Henry, before going for his clothesline. Henry then drops him with a suplex, I think, and then again. He then throws Gabriel into the ring, before running right into him in the turn buckle. Turns out Henry forgot about Sheffield, who hits him with his spear-like clothesline.
Mark Henry eliminated by Skip Sheffield.
Only Tyson Kidd and Evan Bourne are left. Sheffield ran at them, and they both kicked him before Kidd went in. Kidd then was clotheslined in mid air. Sheffield tags in Young, who hits Kidd.
Tyson Kidd eliminated by Darren Young.
Wade Barrett comes in and runs at Evan. Evan then attacks everyone he can, but Wade gets him and drops him. Wade goes for the cover, and it’s over.
Team Nexus wins, seven to nothing.
Evan’s still lying in the ring, and they get him up, as usual, and then run him right into Sheffield’s Spear-Clothesline. Otunga then lifts Evan, and then drops him. As Evan lies there, Justin gets up on the top rope, hitting the 450 Splash.
Barrett gets the mic, and says that what they just saw was an act of total domination. The Nexus has always been 100% behind the common purpose. Cena, or Jericho’s team is already showing cracks. The cracks are due to their individual egos and agendas. Barrett assures us that come SummerSlam, the cracks are going to destroy the team. Sheffield says that he has a team of individuals who have no singular focus. No member of Cena’s team is willing to sacrifice themselves for the betterment of the group, like Nexus will do and has done. What Cena’s looking at is the Nexus. And they are unbreakable. Tarver takes the mic and says that SummerSlam will be no different than tonight. They will eliminate everyone until there’s only one person left, and Tarver hopes it’s Cena. They’ll treat him like a piece of meat, until they’ve all had their fill. They’ll pounce, and when they do, they’ll put him out of his misery. And then it’ll be over, mercifully for Cena, in more ways than one.
Miz is sitting backstage, massaging his forehead from the RKO, and then Sheamus comes up. Sheamus starts hating on Miz, and says that Miz is dreaming if he thinks that he can beat Sheamus. Miz just stares at him. Sheamus asks if Miz thinks he can, just name the time and place. Miz says how about tonight, immediately after they face Cena and Jericho. After Miz wins that match, and throws Sheamus back in the ring. After Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment, and Jericho puts him in the Walls of Jericho, and he’s screaming in pain… Miz has a really good Irish accent, btw, and then Miz cashes in on Sheamus. Sheamus says if Miz keeps pushing him, he’ll make him regret it, and knocks the briefcase across the room. Miz looks around and then scoffs.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog When Michael Tarver speaks, you better listen, but don’t look directly into his eyes or else he’ll consume your soul.
@HitTheRopes A clothesline took out the “World’s Strongest Man”? Really? #wwe
@Niki_Sushi Little Known Fact: Mark Henry and Skip Sheffield have a rap battle every night over drinks.
@TKeep123 Team Steroid vs. Team Jobber ….. outcome as expected. #WWE #RAW #BWF
@BrdWrstlngFn Come on WWE, pull the trigger – you know you want The Miz as the WWE Champion!
@kellylynndobson To Barrett Bourne must have weighed nothing after botching kool aid last week. #bwf
Brie Bella with Nikki Bella vs. Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox
Dear God… It’s the Bellas. Jerry is, however, finally back, so we don’t just have to listen to Cole. The Bellas are dressed alike, so I smell a Switcheroo. Jillian came out to stop the twins from doing said Switcheroo, and Nikki nearly pinned Alicia, but Alicia came back and hit her with her finisher, whatever it’s called.
Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox wins via pinfall!
Someone made the mistake of letting Jillian pick up a mic. Jillian says that she has a gift for Alicia, and she’s gonna sing. She’s singing a fucked up version of We Are the Champions by Queen, but Alicia hits her with her finisher too, and another stupid segment is ended.
<COMMERCIAL>
@dasharpshooters Whores are forever, and so are the Bella Twins. #wwe #raw #bwf
@IAmJHPunk How does Jillian still have a job?! #wwe #raw #bwf
R-Truth is out, screaming his constant question, to be on commentary. Anyway.
Ted DiBiase with Maryse vs. John Morrison
DiBiase and Morrison lock up, as Cole questions Truths’ motives. Maryse grabbed Morrison, and allowed DiBiase to get a chance to beat him up a little. DiBiase goes for a cover, but Morrison kicks out at two. I don’t really care what Truth says, stop focusing on him. DiBiase went for another cover, but Morrison kicked out. DiBiase gets Morrison in a headlock, but Morrison fights out, only to get beat up a bit. Morrison fights back, and Morrison hits DiBiase with his spinny-kick thing, and DiBiase kicks at Morrison. Morrison hits his flying chuck, and goes to the corner, but Maryse gets on the apron and distracts Morrison. DiBiase puts his feet on the rope to try to cover Morrison, but Truth shoves his feet off. DiBiase attacks Truth, and then Morrison tries to take advantage, only to kick Morrison in the face. DiBiase manages to pin Morrison for the win.
Ted DiBiase wins via pinfall!
Truth and Morrison start arguing in the ring, about Truth’s interference, and Morrison leaves, obviously upset, further creating cracks in Team Cena or Team Jericho. Cena’s watching this, worried about how this is going to affect the team. Truth admits that it was his bad, but Morrison doesn’t look impressed.
<COMMERCIAL>
@KeepItFiveStar His name is NOT “Jo Mo Fo Sho” it’s John Morrison. Don’t bring him down to your level.
@BrdWrstlngFn Can we get Alicia Fox out here to kick R-Truth too?
@dasharpshooters Morrison turning heel? Hope so. #wwe raw #bwf
@KeepItFiveStar Ted DiBiase’s purple tights are made from actual skin from Grimace. It’s amazing what money can buy.
“Rip It Up” by Jet is the official SummerSlam theme song!
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Team Nexus? Meet Team Cena (Jericho).>
Lawler has a Cena Slurpee cup with a Triple H straw…
Josh Matthews is backstage with Randy Orton now! He says that earlier, Randy prevented Miz from cashing in. Orton says that before he RKO’d Miz, he RKO’d Sheamus. T he message he sent tonight was clear: the question of who will be champion walking into SummerSlam doesn’t matter, because the question of who’s leaving as champion will be answered with an RKO.
AWESOME!
United States Champion The Miz and WWE Champion Sheamus vs John Cena and Chris Jericho
<COMMERCIAL>
@RAWMysteryGM Spoiler Alert: Miz opens next week’s RAW with the World Heavyweight championship explaining why he cashed in on Kane on Smackdown #WWE
@kickoutblog Y2J chant? Get out of 1999 you parasitic tapeworms!
It’s a shame that they lost their heads…
Sheamus comes out, and there’s already tension between Miz and Sheamus, and everyone knows Jericho and Cena were going to have tension…
Both teams are arguing over who’s going to start the match. I saw Miz go, “Okay, you start it? You start it?” and then run to attack Cena. Cena hits a bulldog by the time I look up, and Miz rolls out of the ring. Miz then tags in Sheamus, who blends in with the ring ropes. They lock up, and Sheamus gets the advantage, keeping Cena in a headlock, but Cena powers out and puts Sheamus in a headlock. Cena hits the shoulder block, and then shoves Sheamus in the corner. Cena holds his hand out and Jericho tags in, cornering Sheamus, before Sheamus turns it around on Jericho. A Y2J chant is starting up, and it makes me happy. Jericho hits a missile dropkick on Sheamus before standing on both Sheamus and the ropes. Jericho gets a kick in the stomach before some moves are exchanged and Sheamus gets flipped out of the ring. Jericho clears the ring, and then Miz mocks Sheamus outside the ring.
<COMMERCIAL>
We come back to Cena and Sheamus, just in time for Cena to get a huge clothesline. Sheamus tags in Miz, but Cena gets the advantage and goes for a cover, only for Miz to kick out. Jericho comes in off the tag and knees Miz right in the nose. Jericho bounces around and goes for a cover, only to try for the Walls of Jericho. Sheamus goes to attack Jericho, but Jericho ducks and finally manages to hit the Lionsault on Sheamus, but Miz takes advantage. Miz gets Chris up and back into his corner, kicking him before Sheamus tags himself in. Sheamus then attacks Chris in the same way, pandering more to Miz than the crowd, as the Miz chokes Chris on the apron as Sheamus distracts the ref. Sheamus clotheslines Jericho and goes for a cover, but Jericho kicks out. Sheamus gets Jericho in a headlock after that, and Jericho gets to his feet and powers out. Sheamus drops Jericho onto his knee and then goes for the cover, but Jericho kicks out at two. Sheamus gets Jericho back to his feet, and then drops him again. Sheamus tags Miz in, and Miz drops his boot on Jericho’s back before hitting him with some forearms. Miz then keeps Jericho on the rope, and slams his throat into it. Miz goes for a cover, but Jericho grabs the rope. Miz then gets a kick to the chin, and then a missile dropkick from the top rope. Cena is yelling at Jericho to tag him, and Miz rolls over to tag in Sheamus. Sheamus then gets Jericho in a headlock, and Cena seems to be trying to walk Jericho through it on the apron. Jericho manages to get up and power out of the headlock and Miz tags his way in. Miz then bounces Jericho’s head off the turnbuckle, and beats him in the corner. The ref forces Miz off, and then Miz yells at him before attempting his swinging corner clothesline, only for Jericho to win.
Miz is slowly rolling to Sheamus, as Jericho crawls to Cena, and it’s now Cena and Sheamus. Cena takes Sheamus down with some shoulder blocks. Cena then sets up and hits the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Miz distracts the ref, and Chris is in the ring too. Chris hits the Code Breaker on Cena, Miz tags in himself, and goes for the cover on Cena.
The United States Champion The Miz and the WWE Champion Sheamus win via pinfall.
Miz already starts walking out of the ring and away from them. Jericho is watching Cena, before climbing back in the ring. Jericho then puts Cena in the Walls of Jericho. Cena flips it and puts Jericho into the STF. Jericho taps, but Khali comes in, trying to talk some sense into them. Edge then hits a Spear on Khali. Cena asks what the hell Edge is doing only for Morrison and Truth to come in. Team Cena/Jericho/whatever is all arguing in the ring. Khali then hits Morrison and Edge, and then everyone tries to tell Khali to stop. Jericho starts screaming at all of them too, telling everyone to stay down.
Looks like the tension on Team Cena/Jericho/YankeeDoodleDandy is going to make everyone a little crazy. How will Nexus take advantage of this? Will Miz ever cash in the Money in the Bank contract, or is he just going to hold onto it forever until the year mark and then cash it in? Later, BWF tweeters.
Terribly sorry everyone, but I feel like crap. I don’t know what’s wrong, I’m just exhausted and what not. So, thanks to that… I’m going to be shortening the RAW review to the bare minimum. Just the important parts and the matches/who won. So… yeah. Here we go!
According to the commercial that came on about five minutes before RAW did, Eve has invoked her rematch clause for the Diva’s Championship against Alicia Fox, and tonight, we’ll find out what the mystery General Manager has in store for Nexus.
We start of RAW with Nexus (and Wade Barrett this week) standing in a line in the ring. Wade says attacking Vince McMahon was just part of a bigger picture. Sheffield says that they attacked Ricky Steamboat and the Legends just for fun, which wasn’t why they attacked the others. An email from the GM says that he’s decided on a punishment for Nexus for their attack on Vince: None of the Nexus can compete for a WWE Title until further notice. Furthermore, the ruling of Nexus members not being able to touch WWE Superstars and vice-versa has been lifted. Cena comes out, followed by Randy, Truth, Evan, John Morrison, and the Hart Dynasty. the Superstars are attacked by Sheamus, Uso’s, Ted, Jericho, Miz, and Edge. Nexus has disappeared. The faces are left standing in the ring. Sheamus says that the heels don’t want to help him. Randy says that he and Cena will never be friends unless they have to, and says that they should finish what they started with the seven heels. An email from the GM says that if they want action, they’ll get it. All eight members of the Money in the Bank Ladder Match will be against one another in singles competition. Cena will face Barrett tonight, but it won’t be a match. The GM want Cena and Barrett to call a truce. Cena says that instead of calling a truce, how about he knocks Barrett’s teeth out. GM says he needs Cena to be the bigger man and he trusts Cena to do the right thing, or else his actions will be met with the appropriate consequences, and… that’s the bottom line, because the GM said so.
<COMMERCIAL>
John Morrison vs Ted DiBiase with Maryse
Maryse sits ringside and calls Cole out for calling her a gold digger. I’m actually a little amused by her, especially that she answered the phone during the match, and just insults Cole. It makes me laugh. Anyway, she jacks Morrison’s jacket and distracts him so that Ted can get a cheap shot… or four? DiBiase hits Dream Street for the win.
Ted DiBiase wins by pinfall.
Santino and Vladimir Kozlov make their way to the ring (“Italia and Russia together again! Like World War 2! Except this time, no Nazis.” – Santino Marealla), and later, John Cena and Wade Barrett are supposed to call a truce… yeah right.
<COMMERCIAL>
Slam of the Week: Vladimir Kozlov defeats Santino Marella and then beats up William Regal after Regal attacks Santino.
Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov vs William Regal and The Great Khali
Regal calls them oxygen thieves before the match even starts and makes me laugh. Regal calls Khali a monster, which makes me roll my eyes… At any rate, Kozlov demolishes Regal, then tags Santino in, almost getting in trouble, Santino gets demolished by Regal, and Kozlov pins Regal.
Vladimir Kozlov and Santino Marella win via pinfall.
After the match, Khali climbs in the ring, and tells Santino and Vladimir to stand Regal up, and just knocks him in the head. Khali and Santino, and Ranjin, dance, and Vladimir wonders where his days of glory went off to.
Later on tonight, Edge brings Chris Jericho and Evan Bourne to The Cutting Edge, as well as information on Ricky “The Dragon” Steamboat and the other Legends after last week’s assault.
<COMMERCIAL>
Arn Anderson says that Ricky’s attack was serious. Sheamus shows up and mocks Anderson, essentially, calling him a pathetic old man. Anderson says that they have to get out of the way of their egos and work on Nexus, or the company, and their careers, are going to go up in flames.
<COMMERCIAL>
United States Champion The Miz vs R-Truth
Miz come sout to Truth’s theme and is rapping, which made me die… It was hilarious. Before the match even starts, he starts beating on Truth, while I’m still laughing my ass off… Anyway, Miz just goes off on Truth’s arm. The bell never officially rang, but for my ego’s sake…
The United States Champion The Miz wins… by ass-kicking.
<COMMERCIAL>
The Cutting Edge: Money In the Bank Pay-Per-View Edition
Edge makes his way to the ring, set up with ladders, and the Money in the Bank briefcase. He says that he’s smarter than Randy and everyone else there. Why make seven enemies, when he can make seven powerful allies? They just need leadership, which he can provide. He goes to call out Evan Bourne, but Jericho comes out instead.
Jericho says he doesn’t take a back seat to anyone, and that Edge is shamelessly pandering to Nexus. He was Wade Barrett’s pro, and that helped him win the season. Chris told Barrett to make an impact, do something never done before. Edge rubs the loss to Evan Bourne in, and Jericho rubs Edge’s loss at Wrestlemania in. Edge starts to give Jericho a history lesson, but Edge just wants to be Jericho, according to Jericho. Edge gets sick of Jericho and attacks him. Jericho attacks back and puts Edge in the walls of Jericho, but Evan comes out and hits Jericho. Then, he jumps over a Spear, ducks under both of them, and flips right out of hte ring. Then the GM sends an email.
The GM says if the audience want to see some action, give him a HELL YEAH. So, they’re clearing the ring of The Cutting Edge stuff, and the following is going to take place.
<COMMERCIAL>
Edge and Chris Jericho vs Evan Bourne and Randy Orton
Starts off with Orton and Bourne getting some really good momentum, and then Jericho turns it around right before the commercial break. When we come back, Edge still has the momentum over Bourne, mostly thanks to Jericho beating Bourne during the break. Randy almost had Jericho set up for the RKO, but Edge interfered and Jericho manage to hit the insigari. Bourne gets tagged in, and Jericho starts to yell and berate Edge, so Edge spears him. Bourne hits the Air Bourne for the win.
Randy Orton and Evan Bourne win via pinfall.
Afterward, Randy hits an RKO on Evan, and smirks toward the ramp.
<COMMERCIAL>
Randy walks backstage, and Nexus stops him. Otunga says that nothing was against Randy, but the WWE Championship match at Fatal 4Way was just to make a statement. They’re trying to apologize, and they won’t interfere in the Money in the Bank Ladder Match, but they can’t promise anything for the steel cage match. Otunga says he wants Randy to think about hit next time Cena tries to recruit him. Randy says he’s heard what they have to say, now get out of his face.
During the previous commercial break, the GM emailed and said that the Hart Dynasty would defend their Unified Tag Team Championships against The Uso’s. The Uso’s and Tamina tell Josh Matthews that this is the opportunity of the lifetime. They say they’ll be the new Tag Team Champions, and next week, everyone will know what the Uso’s and Tamina are all about. Alicia seems upset that she hasn’t been interviewed once since she became the Diva’s Champion. She asks if it’s because she’s not important, or because he doesn’t care what she has to say, and the WWE Universe says that, yeah, she’s pretty much right. Anyway, next is the Diva’s Championship match.
<COMMERCIAL>
Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox vs Eve Torres for the Diva’s Championship
Pretty standard Diva’s match, with Alicia faking an ankle injury to get Eve off guard to retain.
Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox retains via pinfall.
<COMMERCIAL>
The GM says that next week, Edge and Randy Orton will go one on one.
Wade Barrett makes his way to the ring as we get back from the commercial break. Wade says that he wants Cena to come out so they can shake hands like men.
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RUBBER FOOD!!!!
Cena comes out and starts checking for Nexus. He gets in the ring, still looking for Nexus. Wade says that Cena is not in Nexus’ future plans, regardless of what they’ve done. Barrett wants to put everything in the past behind them so that they can move on. The simple fact is that the Nexus Seven are going to be there for a long time and can make his life easy, or a lot harder than it has been. The choice is Cena’s.
Cena asks, if they shake hands, it stops? No more looking over his shoulder? Cena says that the anonymous GM wanted to do this truce, but Cena needs to know if Barrett does, and he needs Barrett’s word. If they shake hands, this stops. Cena holds his hand out, and Barrett goes to shake it, but Cena pulls his hand away and asks why stop when they’re having so much fun?! Cena says take your truces, handshakes, future plans, blah blah blah, crumple them, and stuff them up your Nexus. The future is that Cena takes down Nexus, whether he does it himself, has help, he gets to every single one of them.
Barrett says that the fact that Cena is even capable of standing in the ring is a testament to, basically, how it isn’t about him. Barrett is warning Cena: Shake his hand, or Cena will face some very, very severe consequences. Cena grabs his hand, then starts to get him in an Attitude Adjustment. The Nexus Seven come out, but then dso does Evan Bourne, John Morrison, Mark Henry, Khali, Goldust, Kozlov, Santino, the Hart Dynasty, Yoshi Tatsu… and I think that was all… it got hard to tell. Sorry. Basically, Nexus is then shoved out of the ring, except Darren Young, who got bitch slapped by Mark Henry.
The GM sends an email: I wanted peace, so if things don’t stop now, there will be consequences. Cena puts Young in the STF. The GM sends another email: Cena, because of your actions, you will now face all members of the Nexus next week in a seven-on-one handicapped match. Cena then begins hammering away on Darren Young again. Cena then throws the “steel” ring steps at Darren Young’s head, throws Young over the announce table, and then shoves the announce table over on Young.
Next week, I guess we’ll see more of the Nexus. Until then, seeya around.
Hey guys, I decided to take the night off, and in my absence, twitter user @Punk_Kanellis was kind enough to send us her thoughts on the show. Here they are, enjoy!
Last night on WWE Monday night RAW, comedian Jon Lovitz hosted. You know the night is gonna be corny when a comedian hosts, well anyways, The first match was a Triple Threat Qualifying match. Whoever won would be in the Fatal-Four-Way match next month. The match of course had all the top RAW superstars in it; figures. It went by slow and steady, gaining tension towards the end. Edge won that by spearing Jericho, and then the 3-count. I don’t know about you fans, but I LOVE the Hart Dynasty. They are so powerful, and Natalya plays a great role in it as well. Well, they took on William Regal and Vladimir Kozlov, nothing much to say about this match. The Hart Dynasty won– but wait! Here comes the exciting part! They got attacked by a mystery trio of 2 men and 1 women, we’ll have to wait till next week to see who it was! Jon Lovitz then hosted a “WWE Superstar Search”.. lame to me. Khali and his little “translator” put on a disgusting version of an old song, and then Of course, before Jillian started singing (does that women EVER wrestle?), Lovitz cut her off and pulled someone out of the crowd to do some weird thing with their eyes. Honestly, what happened to World WRESTLING Entertainment? All these acts disgust me, it’s supposed to be wrestling people! Not a reality show! Next up, R-Truth vs. The Miz; this match was actually pretty good. Pretty high impact, back-and-forth action between the two superstars. But, R-Truth came out with the win and told Toledo, Ohio What’s up! Congratulations R-Truth for becoming the New US Champion! Next up, my favorite time of the night, women’s wrestling! These ladies are so talented, I respect them so much. It was Alicia Fox and Maryse vs. the STILL reigning diva’s champion, Eve and Gail Kim. This match was what WWE calls a divas match now-a-days. Maryse wasn’t in the mood to begin with since she failed to re-capture the title from Eve last night, what did make her a little happier is that she rolled up Eve for the win. Short but long segment of new RAW GM Bret Hart assigning the Fatal-Four-Way for next month, the competitors would be John Cena vs. Edge vs. Chris Jericho vs. whoever won this next match, Sheamus vs. Mark Henry. Mark Henry, as always, dominated over Sheamus, but GO FIGURES… Sheamus ended up winning. How do you roll up a man that heavy? I don’t know. Sheamus is also qualified. Bret Hart than got assigned as new RAW GM! Whoo! No more celebs!
ThinkSoJoE and G return for another week of BWF Radio! Lots to talk about this week including the usual RAW, SmackDown, and Impact broadcasts, plus the debuts of NXT Season 6 and the brand new pro wrestling web show, The Underground. In the news, TNA’s BaseBrawl events, more on Ken Doane on Cena & Orton, Jericho’s return, WWE’s stock prices, more on TNA and Scott Steiner, Lanny Poffo on his brother’s Hall of Fame status, potential RAW GMs, the whereabouts of Eric Young, John Laurinaitis’ WWE schedule, and more! All this, plus a quick rundown of this week’s IWC Power Poll! Tune in via the link below!
