What could happen on Smackdown tonight? Best to keep everyone in the dark, right? I mean, god forbit the outcome of a title match would be leaked on the dirt sheets, let alone on the WWE.com website itself. Seriously, right? That would be completely self-defeating and retarded. So clearly Alberto Del Rio didn’t win the title,. there’s no way! So grab your favorite burlap sack, ’cause it’s hoppin’ time!
The Muppets episode in which Chewie is granted the powers of invisibility.
What could it mean? Why is Chewie even here? How could this be the first Smackdown of 2013? Is there a monkey behind me eating alphabet soup? What is his motive? All this and so much more! Join me, shall you, on this magic epic adventure I like to call… “The Fuck?” It’s hopping time, grab your pogo stick playah. (more…)
So the WWE thought it would be funny to make me work on a Tuesday. Bastards. Ha ha ha. You happy now, Vince? Jerk. Anyways, the last time we did this Halo 4 came out and a new president was elected. Something tells me that won’t happen tonight. But what did happen TODAY was that I made an appearance on Rational Wrestling Review representing the BWF. We spoke about the awesome TLC PPV last Sunday and the Slammy themed RAW last night. Let’s see what the hell happens on Smackdown tonight. Thank you Sky TV for being streamed illegally for my viewing pleasure.
So that’s where Christian has been. Drinking beer in the woods. Now I get it.
Fucked up news week. Toronto monkey in a suit, Manny KO’d and lifeless for minutes, Bieber murder/castration plot, Syria, Egypt, Prank call gone horribly wrong… and sadly the mass shootings in an elementary school. 🙁 I’m kind of dejected to say the least (and battling a headcold from last week, still). Maybe some Smackdown can lift my spirits. (more…)
Ahh… Black Friday Night Smackdown. There will be a ton of people not watching, even some that normally would. All six of them. So that just leaves me, the sole viewer of this program to review it for them.
We open w/a replay of Foley facing off w/CM Punk, followed by Punk taking a lead pipe to the gut by Cena, the attack on Foley, and the stare down w/Ryback.
Out first is WWE Champion C.M. Punk w/Paul Heyman. Heyman carries the WWE title. Punk calls Cena a coward and accuses Mick Foley of shooting him a disrespectful look and muttering something under his breath, which is why Punk put him down like a dog. Punk asks (rhetorically) if Mick would’ve disrespected Cena, The Rock, or Steve Austin like that. Heyman answers “no” to each one. He did listen to one thing Foley said, about his legacy and facing John Cena in Hell in The Cell, and that’s why he’s here to announce that it still will not happen.
Heyman takes the Mike and moves on to a most relevant piece of business. We see last week when AJ responded to his marriage proposal by slapping him. He points out she never said no, but she did put her hands on him, in direct violation of an edict by the WWE B.O.D. He reads the memo handed down, and demands AJ be removed from office, and replaced with him.
Vicki Guerro comes out w/Dolph Ziggler and reminds us of AJ attacking her 2 months ago, and we get Heyman vs. Vicki on the mike, briefly. Dolph interjects saying this is all AJ’s fault and suggests Heyman and Vicki team-up to take over.
AJ skips out, and informs us all she is on probation. She calls Heyman a “slimy, shady, greasy, creepy as all hell, worm-like excuse for a man,” and mentions she now has a “coach” advising her on running the show.
And Now Daniel Bryan is out. He says he’s just out to apologize for contributing to AJ’s mental state by dumping her. He refers to himself as a handsome, former world champion with “a great beard,” and he is now the Tag Team Champions, plural.
Out comes Kane to remind us AJ Lee is a “phenomenal kisser,” and agrees with Bryan about everything, except for one item. HE is the tag team champions – plural. This breaks down into everyone hollering at each other, until AJ brings it to a halt with a freak out. She reminds us she is still in charge and makes a tag team match, Punk/Ziggler vs. Team Hell No. AJ skips off and we get a promo for a World Heavyweight Championship debate between Big Show and Sheamus. We see Sin Cara and Rey Mysterio heading towards the ring as we go to break.
Side Note: Rey’s mask is designed to look like it’s half his, Half Sin Cara’s. Cara’s mask is half his, half Rey’s.
Nice touch
REY MYSTERIO/SIN CARA DEF PRIMO/EPICO W/ROSA – The masked Mexicans dominate a fast-paced match up while the Prime Time Players look on from the stage. Rey ends it with the 619 and a drop of the dime for the 1-2-3.
We go to break with a reminder of the Sheamus/Big Show debate coming up later.
U.S. CHAMPION ANTONIO CESARO DEF BRODUS CLAY – This match starts as we come back from break. Cesaro cuts a picture-in-picture promo demanding appreciation in five different languages. Brodus looks strong until he takes a flying back elbow. Cesaro ends it with the neutralizer for the pin.
Backstage: Kaitlin is pulling up her sock over her injured ankle when AJ comes in with her executive coach Christopher J Stevenson. He’s here to evaluate her performance. She makes like she wants to make nice and asks Kaitlin for forgiveness. When Kaitlin smiles at her, AJ bursts into demonic laughter, saying she wasn’t sorry at all, and skips off, leaving CJS and Kaitlin to look confused at each other. We go to break, teasing JR appreciation night.
We come back from break with Zack Ryder in the ring and The Miz coming out. We’re told our social media ambassador for the night will be Larry King.
INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION THE MIZ DEF ZACK RYDER – Ryder actually dominates most of the match, but Miz ends it w/a power-bomb to the corner and the Skull-Crushing-Finale.
We come back from break with Smackdown GM Booker-T making his way to the ring. He introduces the Big Show. As Show comes to the ring, we recap Show giving Randy Orton the WMD on last weeks’ Smackdown. Booker then introduces World Champion Sheamus. Both men make quick opening statements. Booker reads them questions from Twitter. Sheamus keeps reminding Show about losing the World Championship to Daniel Bryan in 45 seconds. Show gets angrier. Show collapses his podium (by accident at first.) Then we go to a Tout from Rey Mysteri-O’Sulivan.
It’s Sheamus in a Mysterio mask.
Yep.
Both men tease a throw-down, but Show just storms off. We get a promo for the main event tag, and we cut to Ryback lumbering towards the ring as we go to break.
RYBACK DEF TENSAI – Michael Cole informs us of Jerry Lawler’s improving condition as the match gets under way. It’s a pretty even trade-off of power moves, but when Ryback attempts to lift Tensai into the Meat Hook, someone botches, twice. Cole and JR try to sell it as a block by Tensai, and Ryback ends this with a hard clothesline.
We go to break with a reminder that tonight is JR appreciation night.
When we come back, we’re introduced to breast cancer survivors and their families in the crowd as part of WWE’s breast cancer awareness month promotion w/the Susan G. Komen foundation.
WWE DIVAS CHAMP EVE DEF BETH PHEONIX – Before the match, we get a recap of Eve trying to suspend Beth, getting called on it by Booker T, and throwing Teddy Long under the bus. Eve cuts a picture-in-picture promo where she hard sells the entire Diva division just a little too earnestly. This was a short back-and-forth match with Eve winning by faking an eye injury, hitting a low kick, and the neck-breaker for the three-count.
Backstage: AJ introduces her coach to Wade Barrett. Wade gives her a tongue-lashing before storming off. AJ says her coach looks intimidated.
We go to break with a promo for the main event.
When we come back, John Bradshaw Layfield gives us a Tout about his successful climb of Mount Kilimanjaro as part of a campaign to raise money for underprivileged children.
SANTINO MORELLA DEF HEATH SLATER (DQ) – Short comedy match ends with Santino hitting the “Cobra” on Slater and Slater’s friends, Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal jumping Santino. Drew hits the “Future Shock” DDT on Santino and they shove the Cobra sock in Sandino’s mouth. Each man introduces himself to the crowd. Drew is still “the Chosen One;” Jinder is “the Maharaja,” and Slater is “The One Man Band.”
We go to commercial with a teaser for “JR appreciation night.”
WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION SHEAMUS DEF DAMIEN SANDOW W/CODY RHODES – Earlier tonight, we had a backstage segment where Sandow and Rhodes both denied the WWE universe coming up with their name while bashing the debate segment. This was one of the most hard-fought matches on RAW in a long time. Both men were booked strong in this match and some are already considering this MOTY material. Match ends with Sheamus throwing Cody in the ring and hitting the Brogue Kick on both men.
We come back from break, with Cole in the ring re-introducing JR to the crowd. JR comes down from the stage, into the ring. Just as JR starts to speak, C.M. Punk heads out with Paul Heyman. Punk gives JR a big build up as a man who’s earned respect. He asks JR to call him “the best in the world.” JR refuses and gives Punk a dressing down. Punk stomps on JR’s hat and orders him out of the ring. JR is halfway gone when RYBACK steps into view. Ryback brings back JR and Punk decides discretion is the better part of valor and takes a hike.
ALBERTO DEL RIO DEF KOFI KINGSTON – Del Rio rides out in a $150,000 Mazarati, as Ricardo Rodriguez introduces him. We take a look back at last Friday on Smackdown as Randy Orton gets the WMD from Big Show, and gets attacked by Del Rio after the show. Kofi comes down with R-Truth and “little Jimmy,” while RR joins the announce team. Ricardo comes off a little disoriented on commentary. Kofi hits his spots but the match ends with him tapping out to the arm-breaker.
Backstage: AJ and her coach are talking. All seems well until AJ suggests that HE be the special guest ref. AJ says a coach “isn’t worth a damn unless he’s been a player,” and her coach “has never been a player.” She throws him out the building, and smirks like a Cheshire Cat.
Side Note: JR makes a boo-boo as he talks over AJ, suggesting Cole “do the reveal,” and apologizes for “talking when he should’ve been listening,” when they come back. Bryan and Kane make their entrances as we go to break.
WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS TEAM HELL NO (BRYAN/KANE) DEF WWE CHAMPION C.M. PUNK (W/PAUL HEYMAN) AND DOLPH ZIGGLER (W/VICKI GUERRO) – We come back with everyone in the ring. AJ makes her way out as “special guest ref,” for the match, and nobody is happy about it. The match itself is a well-paced back and forth tag-team battle, with AJ playing it as a hard-line ref. At one point, Heyman pulls Punk’s foot over the bottom rope to break a three count, and AJ sends him to the back. Vicki protests, and gets sent to the back. Ziggler chases after her, leaving Punk alone to take a choke-slam from Kane for the three-count.
RYTMANS RANT
AJ Lee IS the star of Monday Night RAW, good and bad. The good is AJ has taken this derpy gimmick and RAN with it. She has the intensity and charisma to play this big and it’s worked. The bad is she’s not technically in-ring talent right now, so she’s basically high-jacking the show from the wrestlers.
My problem with this is there’s no point to it. She can’t make herself WWE champion, and she doesn’t seem to care who the champion is, as long as she’s the center of attention. She’s basically playing this as an insane child who sees RAW as her toy box, and if you don’t play “right” she sends you into the cornfield. (Twilight Zone Reference:”It’s a good life.”) To me, this is a waste. AJ is just playing with her “power,” and doesn’t really seem to care about accomplishing anything.
Here’s another thing, WHO THE HELL ARE THE GOOD GUYS AROUND HERE? Going back to AJ, why should I be happy about her sticking it to the heels if she’s just going to turn around and be nasty to the faces? Are Bryan and Kane supposed to be good guys? Why is Bryan still a douche? WHO AM I SUPPOSED TO ROOT FOR?
That’s all for this week boys and girls. I’ll see you next week with another Rytman recap and rant.
This week, ThinkSoJoE, G, and JT discuss RAW, SmackDown and Impact. They discuss the slight rise and sudden downfall of TNA Wrestling, how ridiculous it is that Eric Bischoff isn’t allowed to use his own name, and the lack of a draw for TNA’s latest Pay Per View. Worked shoots are all the rage this week – Mick Foley and Dean Ambrose’s war of words on twitter, and Steve Austin cooling the talk of possibly stepping back in the ring with CM Punk. The talk turns to popular Canadian bands, and a slight discussion on whether Tupac Shakur is actually dead or not. It’s one of the most random wrestling shows on the ‘net, aside from NXT (also a topic of discussion), so click the link below and tune in!
For nearly four years now, I’ve been blogging about professional wrestling right here on BoredWrestlingFan.com. In that time, I’ve seen countless professional wrestlers pass away, but I’ve very rarely ever felt the need to get on the computer and write about it, other than maybe a “RIP So-and-so” status on my personal facebook. Today, however, I felt inspired by the passing of one Chief Jay Strongbow.
When you’re a wrestling fan for a long enough time, there are names that, whether you’d actually seen them compete or not, you know. Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Captain Lou Albano, Rowdy Roddy Piper, Ric Flair, Steve Austin, to name a few. Chief Jay Strongbow is one of those. I can’t honestly say that I’ve seen a Chief Jay Strongbow match in my life, but I know the name. I know the legacy. How big of a name in professional wrestling was Chief Jay Strongbow? Here’s a quote from the 1999 Adam Sandler film, “Big Daddy.”
“He taught me how to do the sleeper hold like Chief Jay Strongbow.”
My only real experience seeing Chief Strongbow with my own eyes was in a ceremony done on WWF Superstars with Tatanka, when Strongbow presented him a feather headdress that was destroyed a few weeks later by Irwin R. Schyster. But I’d known the name for a long, long time. Our condolences to his friends and family.
Welcome back to another trip down Stampede Wrestling’ memory lane. This week I have a match specially picked out for Halloween viewing! First up its a young “Flying Brian Pillman”, who at this point in his career had only recently started training in the famous “dungeon” of the Hart family. Pillman would, of course, go on to the ECW and he would also later become tag champions with Steve Austin. Perhaps his biggest claim to fame was his WWF run as part of the Hart Foundation. Brian Pillman gained international success everywhere he went. Unfortunately, like so many other Stampede trained wrestlers, he was taken from this earth well before his time. His opponent was Jason The Terrible, a “supernatural” wrestling heel who’s character was based on the frightening Friday the 13th movie monster of the same name. Although intended to be an unstoppable heel, Jason would ironically become a very popular face in the Stampede promotion. No matter how hard promoters wanted this character to be an “evil heel” that the fans would fear and boo when he was in the ring, Jason quickly became a fan favorite. In fact, the crowd soon started to love his horror character and bring in hockey masks of their own to show Jason! Fans started to cheer for the monster more than they did the faces that he wrestled against. In other words, Jason The Terrible would become one of the first true “anti-heros” in the business and as Bruce Hart put it “was well on his way to wrestling stardom”. Jason even became tag partners with one of the terratories biggest faces of all time, Owen Hart. Unfortunately, the original Jason The Terrible was involved in a car accident which injured the man behind the mask and put an end to his career. After the original Jason was forced to stop competing in Stampede, there have been other men who wrestled behind the Jason Mask in other territories, but it is THIS Jason that I will always be fond of. Have a fun Halloween wrestling fans, and dont forget to check out www.wonderpodonline.com for more Patman picks and also wonderpod video game podcast episode 86 !
What’s up folks? It’s the man whose got tickets to an empty arena match a TNA Live Event this coming Saturday, ThinkSoJoE, here to bring you the action as WWE presents WWE All-Star Night! It’s been a while since I’ve reviewed a show, and I’m not as hip as G or Pintnoir, and don’t have any animated GIFs to share with you. Plus, I avoid Twitter like the plague on Mondays since I’ve been taking the bus to work and don’t want spoilers, so it’s unlikely I’ll have any tweets to share with you. And before I get started, a very special thank you to the man who helped make me a fan of professional wrestling, my late Grandfather, who would have turned 82 on Monday. I miss you Grandpa!
