Why, hello everybody. I am actually getting Superstars done on the actual night Superstars airs. No time like the present!
Match 1: Ted DiBiase vs Evan Bourne
TD2 comes out and dedicates the match to Cody Rhodes. Ted pounds on AirBourne at the start of the match. Evan kicks DiBiase out of the ring and hits a high-flying move off the top rope to the outside. Bourne goes to the well one too many times and DiBiase catches him and throws him into the barricade as Superstars goes to commercial. Back from commercial, TD2 has Bourne in a headlock on the mat. Ted continues to issue a beating on the much smaller Evan Bourne. DiBiase lands a picture perfect dropkick…ala Randy Orton. As Bourne fights back, DiBiase hits a clothesline that sends Bourne airborne into a flip…pun intended. Evan Bourne keeps fighting and hits his usual offense and as he goes for a flying kick, DiBiase ducks and hits DreamStreet for the win.
Ted DiBiase needs to figure into the title picture at some point. This guy is Randy Orton 2.0!
Ask the Divas segment. God…Jillian is so ugly!
Match 2: Sheamus vs Shelton Benjamin
Shelton comes out with his shoulder wrapped. Sheamus starts out focussing on Shelton’s injured shoulder, but Shelton forces the action outside and is baited into the ring post. As the action re-enters the ring, Sheamus rams Shelton’s shoulder into the post again and again. The match turns technical, as Sheamus applies an armbar and arm DDT. Sheamus rips off the wrapping and continues to work on the Gold Standard’s shoulder. The crowd is absolutely dead during this match. Shelton gets to the ropes and Sheamus continues the beating, resulting in a DQ and win for Benjamin. As the ref is aiding Shelton back to his feet, the Celtic Warrior nails him with a big boot.
Josh Matthews interviews the Hard Dynasty in the Locker area.
Main Event: The Hart Dynasty vs Cryme Tyme
Eve is hot but she needs to quit dancing when she comes out with Cryme Tyme…she looks really idiotic. JTG and Tyson Kidd start it off and Kidd mocks JTG. Very nice athletic chains and counters are applied until tags bring in Shad and David Hart Smith. Here come the power punches and high impact spots. DH tags in Kidd and Shad fights out of the double team and sends Tyson Kidd out to the floor. Shad jumps off the mat and hits a clothesline on both members of the Hart Dynasty, as we go to the last commercial of the evening. Back from commercial, JTG attempts a pin on Kidd and gets a twoooooooooo. DH gets the tag in, but cannot overpower the smaller JTG. With the refs back turned, Tyson Kidd comes out of nowhere to dropkick JTG into the outside ringpost. This allows DH to get his power spots in. Respective tags get Shad and Kidd into the ring and Shad gets his power spots in on Tyson Kidd. Kidd makes the tag and goes for the Hart Attack, but JTG grabs the leg and trips him. Shad then hits the Thugnificent and Cryme Tyme gets the win.
This was a rather entertaining show for a Superstars airing. Come back next week and join me again for another WWE Superstars!
I remembered to watch ECW this week! We’re gonna do this in real-time, so refresh every 10 minutes or so if you’re reading while the show is on!
ECW is coming to us from Miami Florida, where the fans are chanting ECW to kick off the show. Speaking of kicking off the show, the number one contender for the ECW Championship at Night of Champions, Christian, is the first superstar out this evening. His opponent is the guy who got his revenge on Yoshi Tatsu last week, Shelton Benjamin.
Shelton Benjamin def. Christian
Christian was in control of this match, but he climbed to the top rope and Vladimir Kozlov’s music played and the Moscow Mauler made his way down to the ring, allowing Benjamin to dropkick Christian to the outside, and allowing us to take a quick…
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Kozlov has joined in on commentary, and Shelton Benjamin has taken control of this match. Christian shows some signs of life but The Gold Standard keeps on him. Christian manages some separation and hits a missile dropkick. At one point, Christian gets Benjamin draped over the ropes, and some little kid starts chanting “619, 619.” Christian didn’t oblige, however, instead standing on the back of Benjamin and choking him across the ropes. Benjamin hit an armbreaker from the top rope on Christian, but only scored a two count. Christian goes for the Killswitch, but Benjamin manages to escape. He tosses Christian shoulder first into the ringpost and hits Paydirt for the win.
Kozlov smiles at the announce table after the match and says that Christian is “nothing.”
Last week on ECW, Ezekiel Jackson, who is a part of the new superstar initiative despite the fact we used to see him on SmackDown every week, beat the hell out of some jobber. This week, he’s here with Gregory Helms. He’s very happy to be on ECW, and he’s only got one chance to make a good first impression. Helms asks if he felt he needed to break out of The Brian Kendrick’s shadow. Jackson says Kendrick hired him because he needed him.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Paul Burchill is already in the ring. Know what that means? That means he’s doing the job. His opponent was impressive the last couple of weeks in matches with Shelton Benjamin, Yoshi Tatsu.
Yoshi Tatsu def. Paul Burchill
Burchill is aggressive to kick things off, which should be expected from The Ripper. Tatsu fights back, but not for long, Burchill locks in a camel clutch. Tatsu fights out of it and starts throwing kicks. Tatsu goes for a springboard missile dropkick but he slips (and much to Drowgoddess’s delight, there’s no “you f*&#ed up” chant). Burchill takes advantage, but Tatsu manages to hit a “buzzsaw-like” kick to the head of Burchill (to which Matt Striker exclaims, “you’ve got to be Karate Kidding me!”) and picks up the victory.
Still to come, Tommy Dreamer takes on Vladimir Kozlov
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
ZZ Top will be the guest hosts of RAW next Monday.
Tiffany is in her office, and Tyler Rekes enters her office and asks about actually wrestling on ECW instead of on Superstars. She says she’ll book him for next week.
This week, however, she’s booked somebody else. You might know him. If you do, you will remember the name… Goldust. Can you guess who his opponent is? Did you guess Zack Ryder? Woo Woo Woo, you know it!
Zack Ryder def. Goldust
Good to see Goldust actually getting to wrestle instead of being stuck in stupid backstage skits. It’s not like the guy can’t wrestle. Realistically, this should be a showcase for Ryder with Goldust getting his offense in, and thusfar, that’s what it’s been. I just noticed – there’s a new referee! I have no idea what his name is, and we’ll probably never find out. Goldust hits a Bionic Elbow from the middle rope, but he didn’t do the little dance that Dusty used to do, so he only got a two count. Ryder winds up hitting the Zack Attack moments later and picking up the win.
RAW REBOUND: Guest Host Seth Green got himself involved in the main event. As in, he wrestled as the tag team partner of John Cena and Triple H as they took on Legacy. His team lost by disqualification.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Strange things have been happening in ECW, involving a mysterious superhero in green who “blew in and saved the day.” Hahaha, blew in. Matt Striker, you’re so punny.
Sheamus is set for action against some jobber. Sheamus tells him that he’s come to plant his flag as the most dominant superstar in ECW.
Sheamus def. Roman Cornell
If you’re over 15 years of age, you’ll recall the original WWF Superstars of Wrestling television program. You’ll also recall the matches – the established star beats the crap out of the newcomer. That’s what this felt like, despite the fact that Sheamus is a new guy himself. Sheamus picks up the easy win.
Up next, Tommy Dreamer takes on Vladimir Kozlov
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Next week, Christian and Tommy Dreamer will be guests on the Abraham Washington show.
Vladimir Kozlov is smiling on his way to the ring. I don’t want to see this guy smile, I want to see this guy kick ass, because that’s what he does, he kicks ass. Speaking of guys that kick ass, Tommy Dreamer is Kozlov’s opponent. I’m looking forward to a good fight here, that will probably get interrupted by Christian.
Tommy Dreamer vs. Vladimir Kozlov
You know, I was looking for a fight, and I got a wrestling match early on here. The thing is, even though these are two very tough guys who could easily kick your ass, they’re also capable of wrestling. The action spills to the outside, and Dreamer ducked a kick from Kozlov, who kicked the steel post instead. Very good match here. Not a match of the year contender by any means, but it’s entertaining. Kozlov catches Dreamer coming off the top rope with a headbutt to the chest, and drops the ECW Champion with a modified spinebuster for the victory.
Kozlov locks in a submission hold on Dreamer after the match, prompting Christian to come out for the save. Kozlov ducks Christian, who inadvertently hits Tommy Dreamer instead, then Kozlov nails a headbutt to the chest of Christian, leaving both the ECW Champion and his number one contender lying in the ring as the show goes off the air.
My Thoughts: Both the ECW Champion and his number one contender lost their matches tonight, and were both left lying by Vladimir Kozlov at the end of the show. I enjoyed tonight’s show, and I’m glad that Yoshi Tatsu and Sheamus were part of it. Out of the new Superstars they’ve debuted on this show over the last couple of weeks, those are the guys I think have what it takes to make it. I’m not sure about Tyler Rekes yet, and Abraham Washington hasn’t really done anything. It was an enjoyable show tonight for sure. I’ll see you guys Friday for SmackDown!
Giggity giggity giggity it’s time for this week’s review of WWE Superstars… Let’s go!
Right out of the gate we get the opening match. Rey Rey against the Gold Standard Shelton Benjamin, with special guest commentating from the Shaman of Sexy, the Guru of Greatness, the Friday Night Delight John Morrison.
This beginning of this match was awesome!!! Tons of flying and bumping. Rey jumped off of the apron and connected with a hurricanrana on Shelton on the outside. Shelton manhandled Rey a little bit during the match, as most people do. Loads of athleticism were on display during this really good match. The greatest line of the match was when Morrison called Shelton “Socially awkward.” Why hasn’t Shelton/Morrison been announced for Judgement Day?! That would be a fantastic match. Rey gets the win with the 619 and springboard splash. This match was great and gets a 9.8 out of 10…it was that good! After the match, Morrison and Shelton got in each other’s face and Morrison layed Benjamin out.
Match number two is Mizark Hizenry facing the ECW CHAMPION…Captain Charisma…Christian!!! This review will be full of plugs for Christian. I can feel it now.
This one starts off with Big Mark displaying his power as well as Christian ability to sell and take bumps. The quickness and smarts of Christian sends Henry to outside and he hits a baseball slide. Back from commercial break, Christian continues to exhibit his bumping ability, as he allows Mark Henry to dominate the match offensively. Christians speed and passion take Mark Henry down, as he hits a dropkick from the top rope. His agility got him out of several power move attempts by Henry, and he eventually hits a crossbody off the middle rope to pin the World’s Strongest Man. How can anybody deny that Captain Charisma is World Champion material?! The guy is gold!!!!! I give this match a 10 out of 10. Not really, but it gets that because Christian was in it and got the win (it really was about an 8 out of 10).
Match number 3 is Big Show against Hornswoggle! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
This was billed as an exhibition match for Show. The Big Show picked up the troll and placed him on the top rope and allowed him to do his tadpole splash, but Show moved out of the way. HAHAHA! This was rather humorous. He placed him up on the top a second time, but Goldust did a run-in to rescue the midget and got a chokeslam and camelclutch for his efforts from the Big Show. This was funny, but pointless. Since this was not even a match, it gets no rating.
The show was one of the better Superstars so far. At least it didn’t involve any diva wrestling. The show gets a 8.5 out of 10. The last segment hurt it a little bit. Now for a fact of life as I know it…the Houston Rockets are the worst team in the NBA without Yao and T-Mac. How are the Lakers having so much trouble with them? This proves they aren’t as great as everybody thinks they are!!! Kobe SUCKS!!! Thanks for reading and see you next week.
What’s up guys? Tonight, Triple H takes on The Great Khali in a lumberjack match. The lumberjacks? Triple H’s Unforgiven Scramble opponents, The Brian Kendrick, Jeff Hardy, MVP, and Shelton Benjamin. Speaking of, The Brian Kendrick and Jeff Hardy will be one on one for the first time ever, and Shelton Benjamin will take on MVP. All this and more, airing RIGHT NOW on the CW! You guys know how it goes, we do quick results up here on the main page, and detailed results after the jump. Keep hitting refresh every so often for the latest results!
Triple H promo erupts into a brawl featuring all five WWE Championship Scramble competitors and Ezekiel Jackson. Triple H and Jeff Hardy stand tall.
R-Truth def. Bam Neely via pinfall.
Undertaker says he’ll send Vickie to hell to reunite with Edge.
Shelton Benjamin def. MVP via pinfall.
Maryse insults Maria backstage.
Maryse def. Maria via pinfall.
The Brian Kendrick def. Jeff Hardy via pinfall.
Super Crazy def. Ryan Braddock via pinfall.
Big Show challenges Vladimir Kozlov to a match, but it’s ordered to not happen by Vickie Guerrero.
Vickie demands that The Undertaker apologize to her at Unforgiven.
Brie Bella def. Victoria via pinfall.
Triple H def. The Great Khali via pinfall in a Lumberjack Match.
After the match, Jeff Hardy drops Triple H with a Twist of Fate and stands tall over the Champion as the show goes off the air.
Well, I wasn’t planning on doing a real-time tonight, just a review later, but since I decided not to go to the concert I was going to go to (Puddle of Mudd, if you’re wondering), I’m home and ready to go for the BoredWrestlingFan Friday Night Tradition! You know the drill, so here we go!
Jeff Hardy def. Shelton Benjamin via disqualification when MVP interfered
Natalya & Maryse def. Michelle McCool & Maria via pinfall
The Brian Kendrick def. Scotty Goldman via pinfall
