TNA Impact Wrestling 14/11/13
Leave a CommentI hate repeating myself so always change the intro. I also hate repition, so I’ve got no clue why I chose to be the Impact reviewer.
I hate repeating myself so always change the intro. I also hate repition, so I’ve got no clue why I chose to be the Impact reviewer.
Zema Ion as the X-Division Champion
Impact Wrestling star and former X-Division Champion Zema Ion recently took time out of his busy schedule to do an interview with BoredWrestlingFan’s ThinkSoJoE – on Joe’s birthday, no less! We learn the incredible story of how Zema’s mother met his father, escaping a Singapore sweat shop in the process. Zema tells us about his early days, training with the International Wrestling Cartel in Pennsylvania, changing the direction of that promotion in the process. We’re told the story of how he missed his chance to train in Japan, and the discipline it took to train in Mexico. Zema asks a fan question about the whereabouts of his afro, and talks about the bizarre comparisons to Carlito. We learn where the original name of Shiima Xion came from, and who can take responsibility for changing it to Zema Ion upon his arrival in TNA. We get Zema’s thoughts on the injury caused to Jesse Sorrenson, and an update on Sorrenson’s condition. Finally, Zema tells us what band he’d love to play for if he had decided to be a rock star instead of a professional wrestler.
Big thanks to Impact Wrestling and Zema Ion himself for their time!
So we had a lackluster Lockdown 2012 ending with Roode retaining in the flukest way possible. Now we have the champion gloating about his win, but wait we have Mr. Anderson who stilled PO’ed about the beer bottle win from a few weeks back. New Challenger? Well then we get Jeff Hardy who seems to be wanting his turn now that Kurt Angle is out of the picture in another ridiculous feud that started over Hardy having hair and Kurt not.
Hulk Hogan announces that he wants all the champions in the ring. And makes a match for the number one contendership. That fake laughing Hogan.
Tag match involving the other disappointment of the night Matt Morgan and Crimson who are now involved in a tag match against each other. With Bully Ray and Aries thrown to compress the feud.
Ray wins after pulling the tights of Aries. If that wasn’t bad enough here comes Garett Bischoff.
Jeff Hardy talks about how kurt is to blame for his not having the title. Because you know it wasn’t drugs or nothing. Yeah here comes Garett.
Oh wait he has brought out the heavy lifters of the match, AJ, RVD and Anderson. He talks. I fast forward.
And then Flair comes out to talk bout a going away party for a man that shouldn’t be on my TV. Because him and Bischoff are friends what bio did I read where he talks about the disdain that he has for that man?
OH Yeah!
Dangling plot threads abound about AJ Styles, Kazarian and Daniels, will we get are answers probably not but I like Daniels and that non funny Armenian bastard named Kazarian.
AJ and Kurt have a match that is of course nothing short an excellent example of wrestling when Daniels/Kazarian hand Styles the dreaded envelope which distracts AJ long enough for Kurt to get the pin.
Abyss’s brother corners Gunner. And because Gunner’s no snitch he walks away only to have Mr. Park threaten him with legal action. Well the no snitching policy evaporates in the face of jail time. Gunner finally directs Mr. Park toward Bully Ray. Because Park doesn’t watch TNA PPV’s.
All the champions come out. To await on Hogan’s announcement. But before that we have some backstage talk with the new king of sex tapes Hogan wanting to make Hardy vs Anderson a three way and convincing RVD about taking the sweet spot. More pimping of RVD is surely on the way.
OPen Fight Night is announced. New talent will be put in the ring against anyone of thier choosing including the champions. IF they impress Hogan and his panel of judges then they get a contract. This is of course in conjuction with the Gut Check Challenge which has been around for a while. But now it will be televised. Oh and Devon will defend the TV title every week.
Team Gail (Madison, The Sitas and of course Gail) vs Team TNT(Velvet, Mickie and of course TNT) hey at least the Sarita is involved in an actual wrestling match. Well Brooke Tessmacher pins Gail setting up filler for Gail vs (shudder) Velvet which may or may not happen at Slammiversary.
Here comes Devon to defend his title against Gunner. FF because well…Gunner. Devon wins and I testify to that.
James Storm has doubts about his future after not beating Roode. Leaves the ring. I feel for him and I’m sorry about his Damn luck.
So yeah RVD beat Anderson and Hardy to become the number 1 contender for the title. After being gone for how long?
Well here’s to another transition for Impact Wrestling and to Open Fight Night. I’m actually interested in what happens next week which hasn[t been the case for a long time.
Wow, what a whirlwind of activity we’ve had over the last week plus… It’s been a great ride for all involved at Bored Wrestling Fan and Wonderpod-Online! I’d like to thank all involved with this great project, and on behalf of all involved, a special thanks to you the wrestling fans who took the time to check out our work. We do appreciate it! After the link, a complete archive of all the content that came out is available. Just in case you missed something…
HOF!
The following is a repost of A Celebration of Professional Wrestling: Thank you!. We are about to kick things off again this year in celebration of WrestleMania 28, which occurs on April 1st, 2012… unless of course Vince McMahon is secretly planning on the biggest April Fool’s Day joke ever played on wrestling fans.
This post includes all of the content posted at both BoredWrestlingFan.com and Wonderpodonline.com for the week leading up to WrestleMania 27. Click below for all of last year’s content before we begin our online barrage of wrestling-themed content!
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We start Impact Invasion with a wonderful involvement of a cluster fudge clip reel inter-cutting various movies 4,5,6 and 1 with last weeks Bischoff family drama. But lets start the show with a Bully Ray in ring promo.
Meesa Approve.
After being abandoned by his partner, Roode, he wants some answers. Not even allowing Roode’s music to finish before they take it to the ring.
To do some more…talking. Until the real culprit behind their Fleetwood Mac split reveals himself. Steve Borden comes out with his trademark UK special Cricket Bat. He tells the heels to get ready for a tag match against James Storm and….(J Hardy can’t leave the states because of his parole) The Insane Icon, Sting. Ta Ta for now.
So sad you couldn't be here these past two weeks.
The continuing story of Kramer vs Kramer err AJ, Daniels fight over Kazarian continues as we have a one on one bout between the aforementioned parents. After a pretty solid match Daniels wins with brass nucks handed him by a reluctant Kaz.
Gunner and Bisch senior plan infanticid. Where is Mrs. Bischoff? Women are very protective of their children. Would make a better story.
Samoa Joe and Magnus step out next to raucous applause. While under Magnus’ music, of course. And Mag’s cuts a wonderful promo proving (hopefully to Bischoff) that he is the total package. All that comes to an end when the UK heels Morgan and Crimson come to the ring to brawl which comes to an end when joe pulls Magnus from the ring before flippin the bird.
Good showing
Next we have the neglected crown jewel of TNA the X Division. And its a three way between Shelley, Williams and Champ Austin Aries in a non-title bout. This is another strong showing from all competitors where we see Douglas going to the top rope for a flying European uppercut and various outside maneuevers. It finishes when after kicking Williams in the nuts following the chaos theory on Shelley, Aries goes for the brainbuster but is out smarted with slice bread. Giving the match to Alex Shelley in a long overdue rivialry.
In the back Hulk Hogan warns Steve Borden about having a target on his back. And to look out.
But to outside where Gail is beating on Tara. The scene jumps back to Tara taking pictures of the UK, which are interrupted by champ Kim. Bringing the fight full circle. Even with fair fight from Tara the winner after throwing thro a set of doors is Gail who mockingly brags her title and name to Wonder Years.
Hogan and Bischoff Junior are up next. After a HH endorsement we have a interruption by Bischoff Sr. and Gunner. Hilarity ensues. After a brawl Hogan highhandedly beats both Gunner and Bisch Sr. before letting Jr. get a punch in on his dad. Sad. OH AND Bully Ray and Roode argue before there match.
Hardcore Country Mickie James vs Velvet Sky where we watch Mickie slowly go heel due to no title win? What comes across as a decent match ends with a miscalculation by James leading to a win for Velvet.
Even glorified strippers win over Hardcore Country 🙁
Welcome to The Main Event: or See ya in 3 days, Champ! -Bully Ray
the crowd was hot for the faces as they took the champ and ray to task. Sting eventually clears the ring after double splashing Ray/Roode in the corner. Roode eventually dropping on Ray’s manhood. The Insane Icon S Drops Roode before locking in the scorpion deathlock. Ray comes in to interfere but says the above quote with belt in hand. Roode submits as Ray looks on.
The Star Wars promos didn’t overshadow the show because besides the opening montage and Taz being Taz mentioning princess Leila? and the minute response from Tenay the show was still good all around. Here’s to the upcoming pay per view, Against All Odds and a return back to the iMPACT Zone. The ends the no vowel edition of pntnr iMPACT Review.
It’s Sunday, and you know that means it’s time for another installment of Bored Wrestling Fan Radio. This week was a little different than our regular format. ThinkSoJoE was kidnapped, and duct-taped to a chair by Stone Cold Steve Austin, J.T. tore his quad walking across the ring, and DrowGoddess turned face in Toronto facing the Rock. Since Vince McMahon never bothered to ressurect the Wolfpack, Pintnoir and myself did one better. We made the show happen. I’m not sure which of us is Sting or Scott Steiner, but I assure you, neither of us are Buff Bagwell.
This week we discussed the results of the Royal Rumble, RAW, Impact Wrestling, and Smackdown. We took time to focus on the little things while going through the results, addressing some issues that have bothered or pleased us during the week.
See, even when things are not planned, even YOU can record a podcast. Therefore:
Hot off the heels of a Muppet invasion on RAW, comes Smackdown. And as per usual, I am expected lots of great action, so let’s just skip this intro stuff and hop to it, shall we?
Well, maybe not literally…
And Hillbilly Jesus cried…..
Getting ahead of myself. After what should of been the greatest PPV of the year, but instead turned into false expectations and lukewarm matches (except for Austin Aries vs Kendrick, and Lynn/RVD) we have the aftermath.
Impact Wrestling starts with a Sting promo, which leads the former insane icon to call out Hogan. Hogan comes out and gives props to Stinger for the assist in getting back on the right track. He talks on about how it wasn’t Bischoff’s fault for what happened and he takes responsibility for his actions for being a follower instead of a leader. After Hogan leaves, in steps Dixie Carter. She goes on how Sting warned her 18 months ago about Bischoff/Hogan’s plan. Sting accepts her apology and is given the task as…Mick Foley’s Job?? Anyway he’s appointed in charge of Impact Wrestling. But Angle steps out next. He talks about how Dixie being back doesn’t make him happy and how he’s the world champion and will make decisions. Out steps Roode, he tells Kurt that he screwed him and Angle agrees telling Bobby he was a threat and couldn’t let him win. (Nice job making him look threatening) Tells Roode that when they signed the contract Angle took advice from Hogan/Bischoff and put in a no rematch clause.
And just as Kurt is about to mockingly steal Storm’s trademark line guess who’s music hits, James Storm says that since Roode can’t get his rematch he instead volunteers himself. Sting steps in and makes it official. Storm gives Angle the Shade eyes before saying “Sorry about your damn luck!”
Okay for it being what it was that whole segment including commercial breaks (which there where two) Lasted 40 minutes in length. By the time we came back to the show with the Knockout Tag match it was 44 after the hour. Sorry about being a watch Nazi but that was long. That could’ve of been resolved in backstage segments.
Whatever. We have the Knockouts Tag match with former MIA Tara. She and Ms Tessmacher have a match against the TTLV or as I all them Love and Winter with the titles on the line. After a decent match which besides Love’s attempts at offense was capitalized with Tessmacher flying throw the air Ricky Dragon style (flying crossbody) on Winter for the three. She is working her butt off for the respect of the fans without all the push behind her.
The Promos in no particular order include: Hogan being cornered in the parking lot by Immortal, Bischoff tells Hogan to face him like a man in the ring later.
Velvet Sky talks about everything she has went through to get the knockouts title. Which includes clips of her as the heel team the beautiful people alongside Madison Rayne holding the knockout tag titles while laughing heel like. Of course this is followed by her narration of being picked on as a child and through school and how she decided she would never allow that to happen again and to fight for everything she wants. This must include her putting bags on people who were not considered beautiful and spraying hairspray in peoples faces?
Eric Young is doing a photo shoot when Robbie E and Rob Terry confront him. Robbie E wants the television title which Eric obliges on the condition that Rob Terry doesn’t interfere or Eric will get his big time television friends to help him, this is before mentioning Ronnie from the Jersey Shore. (Sigh)
Abyss takes on Gunner. Gunner cuts an okay promo in which he describes how bad ass he is this is before Abyss comes out and destroys him. Gunner runs away to the back. Abyss wins by countout. Backstage Gunner runs into Immortal and tells them “That wasn’t Abyss out there, that was the monster”. They blow him off and proceed to take out Hogan.
In the ring Bischoff talks and eventually slaps Hogan only to cause Hogan to point his finger which the crowd chants “YOU” before Eric runs and Immortal runs in. Sting flies in with two baseball bats and scares off Immortal. Bischoff while walking up the ramp bumps into his son who he berates and even rips off his shirt revealing a Bischoff tattoo over his heart. Garrett B punches his dad before giving Hulk the thumbs up.
Velvet Sky comes out with the Knockouts belt. Talks about the sacrifice she put in and blah blah blah. Karen with Traci come out. First Karen has Traci removed from the arena before moving forward with her plan to physical hurt Velvet. Out comes Madision Rayne. While Velvet is distracted by her a returning Gail Kim runs in and ambushes her from behind. Soon both women Kim and Rayne are beating the tar out of Velvet before all three hug.
And finally we have the conclusion of the program, which include the best 6 minutes in main event history and this includes Jeremy Borash’s introductions of the wrestlers. Welcome Time Nazi, from Midwest time. From 9:50-9:56pm, We have Kurt Angle VS James Storm. But before that we have the Roode pep talk about how Storm’s been preparing for this a long time. Anyway when the bell rings at 9:54pm and Kurt starts beating on Storm in what looks like a not so typical Kurt Angle match getting Storm into the corner before the ref pulls him off twice well on the second attempt Storm busts out the Last Call AKA Super kick and floors Angle for the 3, all by 9:56pm.
What a way to win the title. I know that being a time nazi is not fun but Kurt mentioned in the earlier promo from the opening of the show that him and Roode went for 30 minutes, which means Angle is slowly losing take of time. Because from my recollection it was more like 14 minutes. But who’s counting.
After a brief celebration in which Storm tries to hand Roode the belt which he respectfully declines. We close out at 10:01pm. Bound For Glory is TNA’s Wrestlemania, Starrcade and so on but after Thursday all it really says is that no fan needs to waste money on the program because they can watch a painfully talkative show with a face finish for free. Oh yeah since Impact is being lazy so am I. Here is my one picture.
Sorry about my damn luck!
Hot off the heels of Sunday’s Destination X PPV, Impact Wrestling is set to follow up with something dubbed “A Midsummer’s Nightmare,” or so we’ve been told by Heath Farley last week. For those of you that have already read spoilers… well… let’s just get to this.
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