Tag Archive: Crap

  1. RAW 8.2.10

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    Alright, ladies and gentlemen.  I’m exhausted, and I feel like crap for some reason.  So, I’m going to do the RAW review, include the tweets, but I’m just going to give the basics on the matches, or my opinions.  I may do full coverage of the main event, but it depends on how I feel when it gets there, alright?!

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: Two weeks ago, Team Nexus meets Cena Army, then last week’s Seven-on-Seven Elimination Match, and the cracks in Team Cena/Jericho.>

    You think you know me…

    Edge comes out.  Says stuff.  Commercial.

    Nah, just kidding.

    Edge says he tried, he really did, but last week made him realize he needs to go with his gut, and listen to only himself.  Case and point, after the Royal Rumble, he listened to the WWE Universe, and they let him down.  Just like the SummerSlam team is letting him down.  He doesn’t respect Cena, he doesn’t trust Jericho, he doesn’t have any faith in Khali, he barely knows Truth and Morrison… That’s why he needs to do things his way.  He agrees that Nexus needs to get taken down, but he has a proposal: he does things his way.  Tonight, he challenges Wade Barrett, one on one.  He doesn’t want anyone to interfere.

    What’s up?!

    Truth makes his way down, not rapping his own theme for once, and Truth says he was gonna ask him the same question: Does Edge actually thing challenging Wade to a match is going to fix anything?  It’s bigger than Barrett.  Edge gets that, and that’s why he doesn’t want to listen to Cena.  Truth says fine, don’t listen to Cena, but he’ll listen to Truth.  Edge has been in tons of matches.  But how many times has he ever had to fight for everything, everything? Truth, Edge, they’re fighting for their lifestyles, their friends, family, for the WWE Universe.  It’s us, we, we gotta do this together and fight this together, or Nexus wins.  Simple as that.  Edge needs to stop thinking of himself and pull his head out of his ass, and that’s the truth.

    Edge says it’s clever, but that’s Truth’s version of the truth.  You kill a snake by chopping its head off.  Edge takes out Barrett and Nexus crumbles.  Is Truth going to get out of the ring, or is Edge going to have to Spear him out?


    “If this is what Edge wants, then I will honor his request.  Truth, please exit the ring, because he will face Wade Barrett of Nexus, and that match is next.”

    Truth says good luck, because Edge is on his own.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @IAmJHPunk “YOU GONE SPEAR ME?!” – R-Truth #wwe #raw #bwf

    @SadieandCompany And I Quote makes me want to poke my own eardrums with something! #WWE #BWF

    @KeepItFiveStar “Izz us! Izz WE!. If NOT. NEXUS WIN.” – Perfect grammar from R-Truth

    Edge vs Wade Barrett

    I’m seriously addicted to the Nexus theme song… I really am.  Anyway, decent match, with Edge getting the advantage early on, and Wade stealing it back at every chance.  However, Nexus comes out and Edge takes off into the crowd.

    No winner.

    Still to come, Mr. Money in the Bank will face the Number One Contender to the WWE Championship tonight in a one-on-one match!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @dasharpshooters Maybe Edge should run track for Canada. Boy was moving. #wwe #raw #bwf

    @Niki_Sushi Wait, what? Edge was in the ring #SheamusRevisited #RAW #BWF

    @JonelleDanger #WWE #RAW #BWF skip sheffield reminds me of a bulldog…an overbuff bulldog.

    Backstage, Edge is looking for Cena, and finds him standing there.  Edge asks where he was, and Cena shrugs.  Cena says that no one wanted to listen to him, so he listened to Edge.  No one’s supposed to go down there, so he didn’t.  The only way they have a chance against Nexus is seven-on-seven.  Edge says good luck, because they’re going to be doing it without Edge.  He quits.  Jericho is standing next to Cena, smirking.  Cena asks if he quits too.  Jericho says that Cena doesn’t get it.  If anyone needs to quit, it’s Cena.  He’s just as much a problem as Nexus.  If they have any chance of beating Nexus, it’d be if Cena quit.  If Cena doesn’t wanna do it on his own, Jericho will make him do it.  Jericho says they should go out tonight and have a match: Loser leaves SummerSlam team for good.  Cena says that Nexus is laughing at them and they’re doing the opposite of what they should be doing.  Jericho asks yes or no, and Cena says fine, if that’s what he wants.

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: SummerSlam 1991 in Madison Square Garden; Bret “The Hitman” Hart vs Mr. Perfect for the Intercontinental Championship.>

    Morrison and Khali are backstage.  Morrison says he doesn’t care about last week, but, like in The Magnificent Seven, if the seven don’t stand together, they don’t have a chance.  The Great Khali says they were also the seven dwarves.  Morrison wishes him luck against DiBiase.

    Tarver and Otunga walk up and say they didn’t attack him last week, because they don’t attack people the respect.  Otunga says that if he loses to DiBiase tonight, then Cena may replace him, and if he wants to go somewhere he’s respected, then their door is always open.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @TKeep123 Ok, got a few chills watching Summerslam rewind: Bret Hart v. Mr. Perfect! Those were the days! #WWE #RAW #BWF

    @HitTheRopes @TheRealMorrison: There’s also the 7 evil exes that Scott Pilgrim must face. #wwe

    @Niki_Sushi The Great Khali would eat Wade and shit him out to become the new leader of Nexus. Wade better watch out before he’s fish n chips. #BWF #RAW

    @kickoutblog #TheGreatKhaliSays he sees through Nexus’ clever ruse… he’ll only join Nexus if they kick out Heath Slater

    Eve Torres, Gail Kim, and Natalya vs Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox, Jillian Hall, and Tamina

    Good to see that Natalya finally gets to wrestle, even if it is in this stupid ass match that she’s probably not going to get much action in, but still.  Oh, yeah, and I’m amused by how uninterested Tamina looks in her team mates.  The Divas all went a little crazy outside the ring, though Natalya preformed very well.  Anyway, Alicia attacks from behind for the victory.

    Diva’s Champion Alicia Fox, Tamina, and Jillian Hall win via pinfall.

    Alicia has the mic afterward and says that they’re all witnesses to the greatest reign in Diva’s Champion history.  No matter what match, Alicia has beaten all of them.  There isn’t a Diva on the whole roster that is comparable to her, because she’s-

    And Melina’s theme hits and out she comes!!!  Alicia looks like she’s trying to run, but the very Divas she just insulted are blocking her, and Jillian throws her back in the ring.  Melina ducks a clothesline with a very Matrix-like move then drops Alicia in the Last Call, screaming ‘I’m back!’

    Still to come: John Cena vs Chris Jericho, and the loser will leave the SummerSlam team!

    Sheamus is making his way to the ring!!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @bethsharae Alicia beat Nattie? Well that was crap. #Raw

    @Niki_Sushi Melina can keep doing her splits all around the ring, and we’ll only here the sound of Alicia’s ego splitting in half. #BWF #RAW

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: Last week: Randy Orton defeats Jey Uso, then Jimmy Uso, then Sheamus>

    It’s a shame that they lost their head…

    WWE Champion Sheamus vs. Goldust

    Okay, quick random note: I love Goldust’s tweets.  He makes me laugh so damn hard.

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: Sheamus vs. Goldust on ECW last year>

    Sheamus wins with his High Cross.  Kind of bland match, to be honest, but I do love Gold…

    WWE Champion Sheamus wins via pinfall.

    Sheamus cuts a promo afterward saying that he’s a two-time WWE Champion who got here all by himself, by hard work, and didn’t have to be a third-generation Superstar like Randy Orton, or win a briefcase like The Miz.  Sheamus brings up how he ended Triple H’s career (COUGHdoubtfulCOUGH), and he’s going to do the same to Orton at SummerSlam.  These people never give him the credit or respect he deserves, but he doesn’t want or need it.  All he needs is the WWE Championship.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @dasharpshooters GOLDUST VS SHEAMUS THE FEUD CONTINUES! #wwe #raw #bwf

    @dasharpshooters Aw it’s never good when Goldust gets buried, but it had to happen. #wwe #raw #bwf

    @TheMizMagnet Never before has the man with the WWE Championship jobbed SO MUCH! #BWF

    John Cena vs Chris Jericho: Loser leaves the SummerSlam Team

    BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR AND SHAGGY TOO!!!!!

    Kay, couldn’t resist fucking up Cena’s theme again.  Personally, a prediction to the match, I think that Nexus will interfere and they’ll both be there. My personal feelings.  Anyway, about the match.

    Good match between Jericho and Cena, with Jericho getting a good advantage over the Cena for most of the match.  Cena starts up when he gets his advantage, going for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, only for Jericho to hit the Codebreaker, but Cena rolled out of the ring.  Jericho tried to get him back in, and did, went for a cover, but it took too much time and Cena powered out at two.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    OMG JERICHO DID THE HOGAN THING AGAIN!  I’m okay.  After the commercial break, the momentum changed a few times before Jericho steals it, calling Cena a stupid man a few times.  Cena seemed to tweak his knee on a move off the top rope, but Cena locks the STF and Jericho taps.

    John Cena wins via submission.

    Jericho tapped before the STF was locked in, and Cena looks pretty damn confused.  Jericho shoves the steps, and Cena has a mic.

    Cena asks Chris for just a minute, and Jericho stops.  Cena says that the people saw one helluva match against two of the best in the WWE, and says he doesn’t want Jericho to leave.  He wants him to stay, because Jericho is the best in the world at what he does.  Cena’s not gonna beg though, and says the choice is Jericho’s.  Either come back in the ring and they agree to coexist, and they handle Nexus, or Jericho walks out, and he lets everybody down, including himself.  Jericho stops, looking around for a minute, but starts toward the ring, stops, shakes his head, and walks back toward the back.  He stops at the top of the ramp, then keeps walking toward the back.

    Still to come: Randy Orton vs United States Champion The Miz!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @TheNexusWWE Ha ha ha … 7-on-5 at SummerSlam … too bad for you @JohnCena! #WWE #SSlam

    @IAmJHPunk @IAmJericho (to @JohnCena): “Stay down! You’re a stupid, stupid man! You’re a stupid man!” #wwe #raw #bwf

    Edge is backstage, when Jericho comes up to him.  Edge says that he doesn’t blame Jericho for what he did.  Cena needs them, not the other way around.  Edge respects Jericho for what he did.  Jericho says he doesn’t need that, and he respects that Edge quit.  Cena needs them more than they need him.  They were doing just fine before they got involved with Nexus.  Edge says they’ve been through a lot together, but together, they could own this place.  Maybe the two of them should let bygones be bygones.  The two shake hands, give a man-hug, and then…


    “After what has transpired tonight, next week Edge and Chris Jericho will team together against their former SummerSlam teammates, John Cena and Bret “The Hitman” Hart.  Additionally, all seven members of Nexus will stand at ringside as lumberjacks.”

    Josh Matthews is joined by Randy Orton backstage.  Josh says that Sheamus was going to do the same thing that he did to Triple H at Wrestlemania.  Randy says that he once gave Triple H a six-week vacation due to a kick to the skull.  He invites Sheamus to sit ringside for his match against The Miz.  The good news for Sheamus is that after the match, Miz will be in no shape to cash in his Money in the Bank contract.  The bad news is that in two weeks, it’s Sheamus’ turn.

    Up next, the world premiere of Legendary.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: World premiere of the Legendary trailer.>

    The Great Khali vs. Ted DiBiase

    As usual Maryse accompanies Ted to the ring, but he makes her stay out of it.  Can’t say I blame him.  Anyway, Maryse provided enough of a distraction for Ted to grab the advantage, but Barrett and Sheffield come down to the ring.  DiBiase gets distracted, and Khali just squeezes DiBiase’s head.

    Khali wins via head squishing?

    The United States Champion and Mister Money in the Bank makes his way to the ring!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @IAmJHPunk Someone take out Khali!!! #wwe #raw #bwf

    @IAmJHPunk @TheNexusWWE are wayyyyyyy too good for Khali!!!! #FireKhali #wwe #raw #bwf

    @JCenadotcom So… wait… Khali’s winning matches again?

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: The Bellas hang with the cast of The Other Guys.>

    Will Ferrell won some total cool points from me though as he called The Bellas average looking.  I officially love him… more than before.

    AWESOME!!

    The United States Champion The Miz vs. Randy Orton

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: The Miz attempts to cash in Money in the Bank on Sheamus, only to get RKO’d.>

    Before Randy comes out, Miz talks. He says that last week, Randy made a mistake.  It wasn’t just a lapse in judgment, it was a life-altering moment in the career of Randy Orton.  Because now, he doesn’t have a shred of positivity in his future.  Tonight, he’ll pay for what he did.  At SummerSlam, his best case scenario is that he beats Sheamus for the WWE Championship.  But then what?  What happens next?  Miz’ moment.  Do the voices in Randy’s head hear him?  Miz’ moment!  Randy only delayed the inevitable.  Get it straight: Miz will be WWE Champion, because he’s the Miz and he’s awesome!

    Orton and Miz lock up, and Orton pushes Miz back into the turnbuckle, but neither let go.  Miz turns it around and pushes Orton into the turnbuckle, getting a punch in on Orton’s head before beating on Orton for a few minutes.  Miz Irish Whips Orton into the opposite turnbuckle, but Orton clotheslines Miz.  Orton then stomps on Miz’ chest, and again.  Orton then stomps on Miz’ face, and then goes for the knee-drop, but Miz rolls out of the way.  Miz gets up and knees Orton in the face.  Miz goes for the cover, but Orton kicks out at two.  Miz gets Orton in the corner, and starts stomping.  Miz keeps Orton in the corner for a few minutes before Orton plants a boot in Miz’ face.  Orton has Miz’ head under the bottom rope, and then slams his face into it.  Orton then tries the knee drop again, hits it, and goes for a cover, but Miz kicks out at two.  Orton whips Miz across the ring and Miz holds on to the top rope.  Orton clotheslines him out, and then Sheamus comes out to stand at the top of the ramp.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @ThingsColeSays Will Ferrall buries the Bellas. Good man.

    @LadySwagger6 Bellas did way more than “hang out” with Wahlberg & Ferrell

    @theerj Hey look it’s da Bella Whores!!! Can’t have an ass kissing Guest host segement without those 2

    @dasharpshooters Will Farrell treats his tricks like tricks. #wwe #raw #BOSS #bwf

    We come back to Orton owning Miz with Sheamus watching still.  Orton has Miz in a headlock, but Miz powers out.  Miz then gets revenge with his own boot to the face.  Miz stops to catch his breath before stomping on Orton’s stomach and dropping elbows and forearms on Orton’s chest.  Miz then drops another boot to Orton’s face, but Orton kicks out.  Miz then gets Orton in a headlock and rakes at his face before the ref gets him away.  Orton gets to his feet and powers out of the headlock, getting some this in on Miz before Orton drops Miz in a backbreaker.  Orton’s knee is still bothering him, apparently.  Orton walks over to Miz, but Miz plants him in the turnbuckle.  Orton starts to get up, and Miz backs away, preparing to run across the ring.  He hits Orton with his swinging corner clothesline, before going for a cover.  Orton kicks out at two.  Miz then hits Orton in the head and face a few times before the ref gets him off of Orton.  Randy then uppercuts Miz out of nowhere.  Miz retaliates with a hit to the face that drops Orton.  Miz gets Orton by the ears, but Orton starts fighting back with some powerful hits before hitting Miz with some shoulder blocks, followed by a scoop slam.  Miz is on the edge of the ring apron, and he pulls Miz in through the top and middle rope.  Orton goes to hit his DDT, but Miz flips him over the top rope and onto the floor.

    Miz rolls out of the ring and throws Orton into the ring.  Miz blocks a clothesline and drops him in a backbreaker onto his knee and then down.  Miz goes for a cover, but Orton kicks out at two.  Sheamus looks unimpressed, and Miz looks stunned that Orton kicked out.  Miz goes to clothesline Orton, but Orton comes back with an RKO.  He pins Miz and wins.

    Randy Orton wins via pinfall.

    Sheamus ran down to the ring to attack Randy, but Randy dropped and started pounding the mat, and Sheamus stopped dead in his tracks.  The two stare and Randy smirk-snarls at Sheamus.

    Overall, not a bad RAW.  Seeya next week.

  2. Random Randomness

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    Howdy folks.  It’s Sunday again an you know what that means, another randomization of all things random in this random world with random implications and random consequences.  So without further ado, lets get this show on the road: (more…)

  3. RAW results – 1/25/10

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    Tonight’s guest hosts for RAW were supposed to be Dule Hill and James Roday from Psych, but Roday had to have an appendectomy yesterday and will be unable to participate.  Hill will be hosting himself.  Also tonight, it’s the final RAW stop before the Royal Rumble.  Will Randy Orton and WWE Champion Sheamus continue to attempt to embarrass each other before their title match this Sunday?  What of the Royal Rumble participants?  How will Shawn Michaels react after Triple H dumped him over the top rope last Monday and proclaimed that he’s going to win the Royal Rumble?  Stick around and find out!

    (more…)

  4. RAW review – 10/5/09

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    RAW kicks off, and it’s host is a World Champion from Pittsburgh – but it’s not Kurt Angle. Ben Roelithsberger comes out to some boos, saying he knows they’ve got Eagles fans in the house, but that they’ve also got Steelers fans, but tonight we’re all WWE fans. He says he’s got a surprise. It’s the Diva Bowl. A team of face Divas show up in Steelers jerseys, followed by a team of heel divas in white shirts, followed by Gail Kim in a referee outfit. Great. The one who can actually wrestle is the referee.

    Diva Bowl

    What the hell is this crap?  At least we’re getting it out of the way early.  The faces won when Mickie James pinned Alicia Fox.

    The face Divas are still standing in the ring when the NEW WWE Champion, Randy Orton makes his way to the ring.

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Orton says that last night he defeated John Cena and became a 6 time WWE Champion.  The people say he uses shortcuts, needs backup, and flat out cheats.  When last night did any of that happen?  He and John Cena walked in to Hell in a Cell, and Orton beat him.  End of story.  He’s willing to bet that Cena will interrupt him and ask for a rematch.  Orton tells Cena to do what he thinks he needs to do.  Orton says he knows exactly what he’ll say to Cena.  The fans chant Cena’s name and…

    SHABADOO!  Your time is up my time is now…

    The former champ is here, and he runs down to the ring.  Orton says that Cena looks awful excited, and he thinks he knows why.  Orton says he won’t get a rematch tonight.  Cena’s look turns to that of disappointment.  Cena says Orton just told the WWE Universe that he doesn’t give a damn about them.  He’s a WWE Superstar who strives to be the best, so what Cena’s here to do is congratulate Orton on his win last night.  Cena says he can tell us how brutal Hell In A Cell was, but the interesting thing is that there was something special.  Something Cena noticed before, during, and after the match.  He noticed over 16,000 members of the WWE Universe standing the whole time.  There were people cheering for Cena.  There were people cheering for Orton.  John Cena and Randy Orton has become the rivalry.  Whether a singles match, triple threat, I quit, or Hell In A Cell, it’s simply amazing.  Cena would like to do it one more time, and the people seem to agree.  He cares about the WWE Universe and wants to give them a match.  Not just any match, the match.  The match of matches – an Iron Man match.  Right, like Cena can go for 60 minutes and keep a crowd into it.  Anyways, Cena says that after the iron man match, there will be no more rematches.  Orton says he sees what Cena’s doing.  If Cena wins, he don’t get a rematch.  He says he agrees that we need to end this, but we’ll do it Orton’s way.  If Cena wins he gets the title, if Orton wins, Cena is gone from RAW.  He can go to SmackDown, he can go to ECW, Orton doesn’t care.  He just wants him off of RAW.  Cena confirms that’s what Orton wants and says he’ll do it.  Orton says that’s not all he wants.  No DQ, no count out, and on his terms.  Cena asks that if that means they can use whatever they want and turn this into the biggest brawl of all time.  Orton says that’s exactly what he’s saying.  Take it or leave it.  Cena says 60 minutes, anything goes, and if he loses he leaves RAW.  Cena says he’s on.  The two shake hands, and we’re set to finally end this rivalry.

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Somebody has a sign in the crowd with a picture of a slobbering Daffy Duck that says “JACK THWAGGER” on it.  Somebody’s been reading Bored Wrestling Fan.  Anyways, Swagger’s here.  He says he looks and smells like a winner, because he is a winner.  FYI, he didn’t get pinned last night, and going forth, he will not lose.  For the rest of the year, he promises that he will go undefeated.  He’s the All American American, Jack Swagger, and he approves this message.  Primo’s shitty music starts, and so does the Aldo Montoya pyro, and we confirm that the Cena/Orton match won’t be tonight, it will be at the Bragging Rights PPV.  Please, for the love of insert supreme being here, let Cena lose so I don’t have to see him the next night in Buffalo.

    Jack Swagger vs. Primo

    Swagger’s prophecy starts off on the right foot as he easily defeats Primo following a gutwrench powerbomb.

    Chris Jericho and The Big Show are here.  We’ll hear from the Tag Team Champions later on tonight.

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Backstage, the Divas are arguing when referee Santino blows the whistle.  He calls encroachment on #23 on the defense.  Mickie asks what the hell he’s talking about.  He says he’s trying to get into the football spirit, and asks Mickie and Alicia to kiss and make up.  Alicia slaps Santino and the Divas start brawling again.

    The Miz interrupts Ben Roethlisberger and complains about Swagger insinuating that The Miz lost last night.  Big Ben asks what happened.  Miz admits to getting pin.  The Miz says that being awesome isn’t a catch phrase.  He asks for a shot at Kofi Kingston tonight.  After all, it’s his birthday week.  Ben says he can do this.  He makes the match, but says there’s a stipulation.  If Miz loses, he gets in the middle of the ring, takes the microphone, and tells everybody that “I’m The Miz, and I’m Awful.”

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Last week, Chavo punched Chris Masters in the face for hurting Hornswoggle for some reason. Chavito is here, teaming with The Masterpiece again. Their opponents are the team of MVP and Mark Henry. Shouldn’t MVP be WWE Champion by now?

    MVP & Mark Henry vs. Chavo Guerrero & Chris Masters

    Henry and MVP pick up the win, but Henry appears to have injured his leg.

    After the match, Masters asks Chavo what happened. He gets in Guerrero’s face, and Guerrero shoves him. Masters gets Guerrero in the Master Lock, but Hornswoggle comes to Chavo’s rescue. Chavo drops Masters with a DDT, and then Hornswoggle gives Chavo a DX style crotch chop.

    Ben Roethlisberger is on his way to the ring.

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Roethlisberger makes his way out to the ring – and he barely gets a sentence out when…

    WELL… WELL IT’S THE BIG SHOW – BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!

    Show wants to know whey they call him Big Ben. How big can his big offensive line be compared to The Big Show. Jericho says they’re probably not as big as he is. Roethlisberger invites them out. The Steelers O-line make their way to the ring. Jericho asks if they’re supposed to be intimidated. He says this isn’t a football field, it’s the WWE ring. JeriShow don’t wear helmets or pads, or take time off for turf toe. He suggests the Steelers get a huddle going and figure out a strategy, because Jericho and The Big Show are the best team in sports. The Steelers huddle and line up at the line of scrimmage. The Big Show prepares to go at them, but thinks better of it…

    BREAK IT DOWN!

    DX are here for some reason. Jericho says he should’ve expected a potential Sportscenter moment ruined by two miscreants who hare just here to shill their merchandise (which Jericho shills in the meantime). Triple H says he just wanted to tell Jericho how nice his hair looks. Jericho says “really?” Triple H says hell no, his hair looks ridiculous. HBK says he’s tired of Jericho running his mouth about how many great tag teams they’ve faced. There’s one they haven’t faced. Show asks if that’s some kind of challenge. HBK says he’s in pain, but yeah, it’s a challenge. Show suggests he goes home and nurses his wounds, because DX doesn’t want a part of JeriShow. Jericho says HBK isn’t worthy. DX don’t deserve to face The Big Show and Chris Jericho. Roethlisberger says that tonight, JeriShow will face DX. He says if they’re not down with that, we’ve got two words for you… The Steelers and DX do the crotch chops and set off the pyro.

    Up next, it’s The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston for the WWE United States Championship

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Kofi Kingston is here, and he’s got his United States Championship with him. His opponent is from Cleveland Ohio, and if he loses, he has to announce that he’s The Miz, and He’s Awful.

    The Miz def. Kofi Kingston to become the new United States Champion

    After a hell of a match, The Miz finally hits the Skull Crushing Finale and becomes the NEW United States Heavyweight Champion!

    After the match, he takes the microphone and he says that we’re looking at the NEW United States Champion, because he’s The Miz, and he’s AWESOME!

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Earlier Tonight: John Cena and Randy Orton set the stipulations for their No Disqualification Iron Man Match at Bragging Rights.

    Backstage, Hornswoggle is talking to Ben Roethlisberger when Santino comes in and complains about being slapped and mauled by the Divas. He calls him Ben Surfandturfer. Santino tries to pronounce Roethlisberger’s name, even calling him “Ben Bralesswonder.” Hornswoggle slaps Santino, who then manages to say Roethlisberger.

    The Big Show and Chris Jericho are walking backstage. That means, they’re next!

    You can help out the Ben Roethlisberger Foundation by going to bigben7.com/foundation.aspx

    <COMMERCIAL BREAK>

    Nancy O’Dell and Maria Menounos from Access Hollywood are the guest hostesses next week. One of them is featured in WWE Magazine this month (the one with DX on the cover) as the Sexy Celebrity Super Fan of the month, and the article asks her about her experience guest hosting RAW.

    The Unified Tag Team Champions make their way out, and then…

    Are You Ready?

    DX head to the ring. They don’t bother to do their little spiel, it’s all business for the HeartBreak Kid and The Game tonight.

    DX def. JeriShow

    NOTE: As you guys know by now, I leave for work before the end of RAW.  This week we had some technical difficulties with the site, so I didn’t bother to get somebody to finish the review for me.  I have not seen this match, so the following is my knowledge of the main event based on other reviews I’ve read.  This won’t be a weekly thing, just this week due to the technical problems.

    JeriShow focused on DX’s injuries from last night’s Hell In A Cell match, but DX held their own.  Jericho attempted to leave, but was stopped at the top of the ramp by the Pittsburgh Steelers offensive line.  Jericho was forced back into the ring and ate Sweet Chin Music, leading to the DX victory.

    My Thoughts: “Please let Orton win, please let Orton win, please let Orton win.”  Those are my thoughts.  Bragging Rights is Sunday, October 25th.  On October 26th, I’ll be in attendance at RAW.  If Orton wins, Cena’s gone from RAW.  I don’t know why I’m so hell bent on not seeing John Cena at RAW.  I think I’m just frustrated with the direction of his character from the time he won the WWE Championship at WrestleMania 21.  I was a huge Cena mark when I saw him at WrestleMania XIX in Seattle and the night he turned face on SmackDown in Buffalo.  I’m just bored with him now.  WWE pushes him like crazy despite the fact that it’s obvious a lot of fans hate him.  I understand why though – he sells a lot of merchandise and is probably the closest thing they have to a mainstream star right now, the Hulk Hogan of this generation.  For what it’s worth, the dark main event that has been advertised for RAW the day after Bragging Rights is DX and Cena against Orton and Legacy.

    Now, the future.  The Miz and John Morrison called themselves the greatest tag team of the 21st Century (that’s a hint for those of you doing the “guess the match” thing in the back of this month’s WWE Magazine, BTW), and both hold the secondary titles on their respective brands now, with JoMo the Intercontinental Champion and The Miz as the United States Champion.  These two guys are going to be HUGE in the future.  Of course, I probably would’ve said that two years ago about MVP, but we see where he is.  Teaming with Mark Henry to face Chavo Guerrero and Chris Masters.

    DX has been the focal point of RAW and the last three PPVs.  Nevermind that Randy Orton and John Cena have traded the WWE Championship back and forth in what could be considered epic battles through those last three events.  For these guys to get top billing over the guys wrestling for the championship leads me to believe that one of them maybe knows somebody in power in the WWE.  Oh look, I can make subtle jokes about who Triple H is married to too!

    That’s it for RAW this week, folks.  I just want to let you guys know of a couple of things we’ve got going on around here in the near future.  First, I’m working on a new BWF Skin that should be available sometime in the next couple of days.  I’m also planning on dropping the “Grungy” and “BlueMania 25” themes.  I’m not happy with them, and in the case of “Grungy,” it’s hard to expand upon when we add new things.  I’m also planning on doing an Eddie Guerrero tribute column next month on the four year anniversary of his death.  I’d like to include the thoughts of our readers, so get those to us in one of three ways – send them in a PM to ThinkSoJoE on the BWF Network Forums, tweet them to @BrdWrstlngFn, or e-mail them to GuerreroTribute@boredwrestlingfan.com.

  5. SmackDown in real-time, 8/22/08

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    It’s Friday Night, you guys know what’s up!  Much like last week, this week’s SmackDown in real-time is brought to you by the BoredWrestlingFan skipping a free concert – this week it’s Joan Jett.  Anyways, quick results up here, detailed results after the jump, as per usual!

    Vickie Guerrero announces that SmackDown will also have a Championship Scramble match at Unforgiven.

    Maria def. Natalya via disqualification when Maryse interfered

    Big Show finds out he’s been overlooked as far as the Championship Scramble is concerned

    The Brian Kendrick wins a 10 man battle royal to qualify for the Championship Scramble – thanks to The Big Show.

    MVP def. Festus via countout to qualify for the Championship Scramble.

    Shelton Benjamin def. Finlay to qualify for the Championship Scramble.

    Jeff Hardy def. The Great Khali to qualify for the Championship Scramble.

    Detailed results after the jump. (more…)

  6. BWF Podcast #5

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    BWF Podcast 5 (Right click, save as)

    Alright, we’ve had a crazy podcasting week – and as of this moment, the only podcast available on the site is the newest one – an audio podcast taken from what was going to be a video podcast.  Then the cats managed to cut off power to my modem about halfway through the video upload, so I nixed that idea in favor of the audio.  Then our podcasting software wasn’t working, thanks to an upgrade of our main software.  For now we’ve got a replacement, but the previous Podcasts won’t work, and after all the crap I just went through trying to get this one up, I don’t really feel like going back and fixing them, especially when I’m probably going back to the old software once an update for that comes out.  Anyways, enjoy!