WWE RAW 7/7/14 – Tango India Tango Tango Yankee
1 CommentWell, I managed to avoid social media this week. No spoilers. My wife did give an “oh shit!” to something she saw on the show while I was on the phone with her, but she didn’t tell me what it is. So genuine surprises for me this week! WooHoo!
Wow, they let Roman Reigns cut a promo on his own for once – and it wasn’t half bad. And that brawl with Kane? It’s always fun to see Fit Finlay, Jamie Noble, Mike Rotunda, Dean Malenko, and Joey Mercury get tossed around a bit too.
The Wyatt Family beat the Usos! Too bad it was a non-title match. Again.
WWE Network has a 90% satisfaction rate? That’s not what I’ve been hearing. That said, I’ll throw my approval their way. Haven’t had any problems since that first couple weeks.
Isn’t the point of having one hand tied behind your back in a match to be handicap? What’s the point of both Nikki Bella and Alicia Fox having their arms tied behind their backs? The obvious setup, of course. The fans chant bullshit. Or maybe boring. I can’t tell. Thick French-Canadian accents in Montreal.
You know, if you’re trying to get Rusev over as a heel in Canada, shouldn’t you have him face a Canadian, and not Rob Van Dam? FFW! Rusev Wins. Fatality.
Sign in the crowd for Randy Orton vs. Dean Ambrose: “TANGO INDIA TANGO TANGO YANKEE.” Brilliant. They’re really letting Titty Master Moxley have a good showing against Ortbot. Orton picks up the win, but credit where it’s due – what a match! Let’s put it this way. I write this stream of consciousness on Monday Night RAW so you don’t have to watch – but this… this is worth finding and watching.
Years ago at a local show called Ballpark Brawl, this dude was wearing a Mötley Crüe t-shirt that said “Girls, Girls, Girls,” and some guy yells “YOUR SHIRT SAYS ‘GIRLS, GIRLS, GIRLS,’ BUT YOU LIKE GUYS, GUYS, GUYS!” I think of that every time I see Fandango’s pants with the world “Girls” written all over them. And he’s only on commentary. Ziggler vs. Del Rio is the match in the ring. “Fandango is the Fonz of the WWE. Hey.” Del Rio wins off the distraction from Arthur Fandangorelli.
Cody Rhodes’ embracing of the Stardust character is just amazing.
Can’t have a show in Montreal without referencing Jerry Lawler’s heart attack or the 1997 Survivor Series. So let’s have Lawler introduce Bret Hart. I knew somebody would interrupt Bret – I wasn’t expecting Damien Sandow dressed as Bret Hart (or Bret Sandhart, as he called himself). Though I probably should have been. Hart decks Sandow and knocks him out of the ring. Which in my opinion gives Sheamus an unfair advantage in his match with Sandow. Which he, of course, wins.
Dammit, I missed the preview of “Monday Night Wars” on WWE Network. D’oh! Also, I’m bummed that the October 1989 episode of Saturday Night’s Main Event is not on there yet either. I want to watch Mr. Perfect destroy the WWF Championship.
Instead, I’ll watch Jericho vs. The Miz. Jericho appears to be bleeding from somewhere near the ear. Can’t get a good look at it though. I can’t really tell how bad it is. But it’s irrelevant I guess, since Jericho picked up the win with the Walls of Jericho. Jericho should know better than to think he’ll get a clean shot at Bray Wyatt without Rowan and Harper standing in his way.
Two Diva matches on one show? And this one is a tag team match – so that means six Divas wrestling on one show. It’s the Funkadactyls against… Paige and AJ? So this is a question of which team breaks up first. Cameron, who was completely disinterested in this match, tags herself in and gets a Paige Turner for her trouble – and the loss. Joey Styles isn’t on commentary for the brawl that breaks out between Cameron and Naomi to yell “CAT FIGHT! CAT FIGHT!”
Cesaro’s five languages come in handy when he’s in Montreal. I have no idea what he said in French, but I guess it doesn’t matter since they speak Quebecois in Montreal anyway. And Cesaro loses to Kofi Kingston again. Big E saves Kofi from the beatdown. Why is Cesaro jobbing to this jobber-to-the-stars?
Bo Dallas vs. Diego of Los Matadores. Now where have I seen this before? Oh, that’s right. This past Friday on SmackDown. Oh wait. He’s wrestling El Torito. Bo wins, of course. You know, I’d like to see a match between Los Matadores & El Torito against Bull Dempsey or whatever the dude’s name is in NXT. They’re bullfighters, right?
I FFW through the main event (John Cena vs. Seth Rollins) to see Kane and Orton attack Cena. The predictable ending of Cena getting knocked out only to have the WWE World Heavyweight Championship saved from a cash-in by Dean Ambrose happens again. Then Super Cena hits an AA on Orton, and gets saved from Kane by a Roman Reigns spear. The end.
Not a bad episode of RAW, IMO. I think the “oh shit!” from my wife was AJ being Paige’s partner. Ambrose/Orton is worth watching. Now to see if I can’t find me a copy of the Monday Night War preview. See you all Sunday for BWF Radio!