Tag Archive: Tights

  1. RYTMAN’S RECAP – RAW 04/22/2013

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    Let’s start with…

    MATCH RESULTS

    1.) R-TRUTH DEF. ANTONIO CESARO – This was kind of a weird match.  Cesaro dominates using his strength and wear-down holds on Truth, until Cesaro misses a clothesline.  Truth takes over with fast-strikes, (mostly kicks,) and gets the win with the face-drop.

    Rytman Remark: What is with the R-Truth winning streak?  Are they building him up to challenge Ziggler?  And why R-Truth as opposed to…anybody else?

    Side Note: The less said about Cesaro yodeling the better.

    2.) DAMIEN SANDOW (w/Cody Rhodes) DEF. BRODUS CLAY (w/”Sweet T” and the Funkadactyls) – Team Rhodes Scholars (Sandow/Cody Rhodes,) come out without the Bellas for the second time this month.  Clay tosses Sandow around with ease, until Sandow takes control with a combo of short-range strikes and mat-wrestling.  Match ends with Cody distracting Brodus and Sandow getting a roll-up with a handful of tights for the three-count.

    Rytman Remark: Without a Bellas/Funkadactyls cat-fight, this feud really has no point.

    3.) ZIGGLER (w/AJ and Big E.) DEF. CHRIS JERICHO – First really good, solid match of the night.  The first high point is Dolph faking out Jericho and sliding out to score a kiss from AJ, and Jericho responding w/a drop-kick to the back of the head.  Ziggler dominates until he gets cocky, and Jericho uses his agility and high-flying moves to make a come-back.  Jericho locks in the “Walls of Jericho,” and just when it looks like Ziggler will tap…

    #DADA-DA-DA-DA-DADA…

    Yup, Fandango’s music hits, and a distracted Jericho takes a Zig-Zag from Ziggler, who gets the pin.

    Rytman Remark: Sorry to see a loss for Jericho, but Ziggy needed the win here.

    4.) “SWEET T” (w/Brodus Clay & the Funkadactyls) DEF. CODY RHODES (w/Damian Sandow)– Pretty much the same match we saw earlier (see Brodus/Sandow,) with the exception of “Sweet T” holding Cody up in the air for a long time (ala Davy Boy Smith’s standing vertical suplex.) Brodus and the Funkadactyls try to get the crowd going with mixed results.  Sandow interferes but Brodus takes him down with a head-butt charge, and “T” catches Cody’s attempted “Beautiful Disaster” kick.  “T” gets a three-count, and we get a dance party.

    Rytman Remark:

    …

    …

    What do you wanna hear?  It was what it was.

    5.) BIG E. DEF. ZACK RYDER – Ryder got in some offense, but this ended with the “Big Ending” by Langston for a three-count.

    Rytman Remark: Let’s face it people, this is the best possible use for Ryder.  At least he’s getting TV time.

    6.) THE SHIELD DEF. THE UNDERTAKER/WWE TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS TEAM HELL NO (KANE/DANIEL BRYAN) – The big match of the night.  Crowd was into this one before it even got started.  Taker makes his entrance alone, and is soon surrounded by the Shield. (See “Angles” below.) Team Hell No run-in just in time and the match gets going.

    Taker’s team took control early w/quick and frequent tags and getting an “old school” spot on Ambrose (second attempt.) They double-teamed Ambrose, then Reigns.  The Shield took over on Kane when Reigns held him for a clothesline/running kick combo from Ambrose/Rollins.  Shield takes turns beating down Kane, but Kane gets Daniel Bryan in, and Bryan has huge crowd support.  He gets the “YES” chants going with every shot he lands until he misses a charging dropkick to Rollins in the corner.

    Shield works over Bryan until Taker gets the hot tag.  Taker is in charge until Reigns gets a spear in.  Kane comes back in and takes over, bringing Bryan back in.  Taker/Kane get into a brawl w/Rollins & Reigns while D-Bry misses the flying head-butt.  Ambrose wraps him up and gets a three-count.

    Rytman Remark: Sorry to see Taker get a loss, but putting over the Shield was the right thing to do.

    7.) FANDANGO DEF. WILLIAM REGAL – Here’s a fun little surprise bonus.  Regal matches Fandango’s hip action w/a little step or two of his own.  The match ends quickly when Fandango catches Regal in the “Dip-DT,” (Copyright, Robert Rytman,) and gets the three-count.

    Rytman Remark: Good to see Regal here in action.  Just now (sadly) realizing how awesome a Regal/Jericho tag team would’ve been.

    8.) DIVA ROYAL – AJ, Layla, Naomi, Aksana, and Tamina.  Diva’s Champ Kaitlyn joins the announce team to scout this match.  The Bellas (according to the announce team) where disqualified from competing in this because of their illegal double team on Kaitlyn last week. (Author’s note: Dafuq?) AJ teases a kissing spot on Tamina, who responds with a kick to the face.  AJ spends the whole match out on her back (Author’s note: SHUT UP PERVS!) while the other ladies eliminate each other.

    Layla is the last girl standing.  She tries to get AJ up and through the ropes while AJ sandbags her.  AJ ‘comes to” and kicks Layla out of the ring to win.

    Rytman Remark: Okay, I get what they’re doing.  They don’t trust AJ to wrestle a whole match, so they book her to win, by making one smart move at the right time.  Not a horrible idea, but they will run out of ways for her to pull it off quick.

    Side Note: The Bellas were “disqualified” from being in the battle royal for their illegal double team last week?  I could go into a dissertation about all the ways that doesn’t work and all the plot-holes it opens, but I wanna get this over with, you wanna get back to your lives, let’s just call it stupid and leave it at that.

    Side-Side Note: I’d be wasting the effort it would take to point out Layla could’ve just rolled AJ over the bottom rope to the floor, right?

    Okay, moving on to…

    MAJOR STORYLINES/ANGLES

    1.) BROCK/TRIPLE H: THE SAGA CONTINUES…WEITHER WE LIKE IT OR NOT – RAW opens with a fade-in on a close-up of Paul Heyman.  Heyman introduces himself as a representative for Brock Lesnar, and recaps his decimation of 3MB last week, as well as his subsequent challenge to Triple H to a cage match at “Extreme Rules.” He announces that Triple H is not at RAW, and reads an e-mail from him, saying his injuries have kept him from flying and he will answer Heyman next week.  Heyman knows how let-down we all are.  He feels the same…

    “I have been let down by this gutless coward who didn’t have the manhood to appear tonight… “- Paul Heyman

    At that moment, the music hits and Triple H is out!  He explains the e-mail simply, he lied.

    He asks Paul for a favor…

    “I want you to go back home to Brock Lesnar and tell him I ACCEPT!” – Triple H

    Triple H ends this w/a pedigree on Heyman to the cheers of the crowd.

    Rytman Remark: This has got to be a record, SHORTEST TRIPLE H PROMO EVER!

    2.) ZIGGLER/DEL-RIO/SWAGGER: HEY THIS MIGHT GET INTERES-NEVERMIND – We backstage as Ziggler is making kissy-kissy w/the World Heavyweight Championship.  AJ shows up and jokes about being jealous.  Ziggler remarks how good she’d look with a title of her own, when we notice Big E. looking on…

      “E! This is Dolph-and-AJ time. Please no creeping!” – Dolph Ziggler.

    Big E. walks off as RAW managing supervisor Vicki Guerro and her assistant Brad Maddox enter, informing Ziggler if he loses to Jericho tonight, Jericho gets a spot in the title match w/Swagger & Alberto Del Rio, making it a four-way at extreme rules.  Ziggler wins, (see Match Results, above,) and everyone gets disappointed.

    Rytman Remark: Nice tease job WWE, however I argue that Jericho would’ve brought some BADLY needed heat to a lukewarm angle.

    3.) JERICHO/FANDANGO: SPECIAL GUEST DIVA, SUMMER RAE – Fandango comes out for his match with Regal, with NXT developmental diva Summer Rae as his new dance partner.  After his win (see Match Results, above,) he gets jumped from behind by Jericho, who rubs salt in the wound by offering Summer a dance.  She accepts and Jericho gives her a whirl.  Summer looks flustered (in the good way) as Fandango rolls around in pain.

    4.) SHIELD/TAKER/TEAM HELL NO: AN UNDERTAKING OF TAKING ON, THE TAKING-OUT OF UNDERTAKER – The Shield make their first on-camera appearance of the night, by helicopter, transferring to a black Range Rover to the arena.

    Backstage, Bryan is upset that the Taker hasn’t shown up to go over strategy.  He asks Kane why he doesn’t just call his brother…

    “Give him a call? He doesn’t exactly carry a cell phone!” – Kane

    Bryan insists that Kane look at his diagrams, and asks if Kane is upset about them not hugging in a while.  Kane asks Bryan for a favor when Taker shows up.

    “Do NOT try to give him a hug!” – Kane

    Suddenly, Kane and Bryan go down hard as the camera shakes.  The tag champs are on the floor as three sets of black boots stroll off.

    Later in the night, it looked like the Taker would have to face Shield all by himself, but Hell No made the match in time.

    Rytman Remark: Waste of effort seeing how Shield won anyway.

    5.) CENA/RYBACK: I HAVE NOTHING – We take a look back at the recent bad-blood between Cena/Ryback, and how it’s lead to a match at Extreme Rules.  Mick Foley is interviewed about Ryback’s recent actions.  Foley mentions how it’s not in human nature to look in the mirror and see your own shortcomings.  Ryback responds in his interview later that night…

    “I look in the mirror and don’t see shortcomings. I look in the mirror, and see the next WWE Champion!” – Ryback

    It’s revealed that Foley will confront Ryback later on the show.  A little later, we see Foley talking w/Cena backstage…

    “In a career full of mistakes, this might be my biggest!” – Mick Foley

    I’m just gonna sum this up, Foley calls out Ryback and gives him the speech about character, about how he can have all the tools, but needs heart and guts to get it done, and how letting Cena get beat-down by other people makes it a cheap-win.  Ryback snaps back with how Foley is old and his message is archaic.  It looks like Ryback will kill Foley, but Cena runs out to make the save, much to the disappointment of a crowd that wanted to see Foley die apparently.

    The Shield makes an appearance and Cena teases leaving Ryback at their mercy.  But when Shield attacks, Cena makes the save with a chair and runs the Shield off.  Cena gives the AA to a confused Ryback, and RAW ends w/Cena standing tall.

    Rytman Remark: Why can’t Mark Henry be the #1 contender and just spare us all this?

    Side Note: Why didn’t Ryback and the Shield join forces?  It was the perfect moment and would’ve been easy to explain.  Ryback wants Cena, Shield wants to get rid of Cena, done and done.

    Rytman’s Review: I liked this RAW up until the ending.  It kept things moving and set up the stories nicely, but this FRIGGIN’ ending made no damn sense.  My only guess is the save at the end was an attempted “make good” to Ryback in order to protect Cena’s image.

  2. Pintnoir reviews Impact Wrestling – 3/15/2012 (A match for Anderson)

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    We open with Steve and Bobby walking into the arena (from separate entrances of course). For some reason Roode step out of the pyro room which makes me wonder. We get a vignette of Roode vs Sting going into Victory Road this Sunday.

    James Storm our official TNA redneck comes out to make an inring promo about his eventual confrontation in a steel cage with the aforementioned Roode. I smell a slobber knocker coming this April. Just as Storm’s finishes Bully Ray comes out. He taughts the #1 contender tellling him that he won’t make it to Lockdown. And just when we think a fight is about to break out Ray calls out Gunner to take his licks. After a couple of punches the security groupies rush the ramp to separate the two, during the insueing ruckus Ray gets in a cheap shot.

    Another Bobby Roode vignette about Sting.

    Madison and Gail argue about losing the tag titles which they really weren’t defending, but i digress. They confront Sting who tells them that he’s busy dealing with Roode. He sets up two matches Gail vs Mickie and Madison vs Velvet Sky, Rayne’s match is next.

    Madison Rayne vs Velvet Sky:

    Madison composes herself on the ramp before cutting into her Killer Queen gimmick, which by the way needs to change but “hearts” to her anyway. Velvet comes out next shaking her pom poms and just as she is ready to staddle a rope for pigeons, she darts toward Rayne spear first. Early on Sky has the advantage with her assorted moves of doom until Madison gets the upper and due to a ref who can’t keep his hands off the knockout. Then the crowd gets behind Velvet which comes out like a druid chant for a death march. I laugh and die on the inside. No offense to the Madison haters but I’m behind her as her move set and more diversified. Anyway after a rollup by Sky which is reversed into another roll up with tights for the win.

    Crimson is smug backstage bragging about the win over the two Robs, which is as brag worthy as breathing. After Morgan questions Crimson’s motives about winning belts and making money they head out.

    Samoa Joe vs Crimson:

    A short match to show that Crimson/Morgan are on the same page and another loss for Joe with Magnus looking weaker even by comparison when he attempts to attack Morgan on the outside only to get irish whipped into the ring post.

    Austin Aries comes out and shows his X division champion reel and brags about being the longest reigning X Division champion exceeding the previous record of 182 days set by Christopher Daniels. Celebrating aside out comes Zema Ion, after some exchanges about breaking necks and nut hair growth, Ion gives the toast right before he throws a drink in is face. Aries answers back by dousing Ion in the hole bottle ruining his pretty hair.

    Gail Kim vs Mickie James:

    There was promos with Sting going on about crowing and craziness but ehh. Mickie and Gail continue to prove their previous WWE stint match was a fluke which they have been trying to allevate through superior matches. This one is no different. After Gail messes with Mickie’s knee we have a methodical attack which culminates with Mickie making a comeback but Kim out smarting her with a belt to the face. she scores the win. heel syle.

    We have a watercooler or Lemonade talk according to Anderson about his involvement with AJ Styles. Daniels is curious why he’s taking Styles side which I had the same question because the story looked to be going good til last week. When Kazarian went from unwilling pawn to bitter assistant to all an out heel which now makes this story seem trite. But we have a match between the Daniels and Anderson to hype.

    Daniels vs Anderson:

    Anderson knocks off some ring rust with Daniels as he seems to not miss a step. Daniels bumps like a madman. Anderson and Daniels battle and during the melee Chris cuts his cheek. Kazarian comes down to the ring to distract Anderson only for AJ to come to the rescue Daniels gets up only to take a mic check. Anderson wins and prepares for Victory Road.

    Jeff Hardy prattles on about Angle being an Olympic gold medalist. and his creatures. Speaking of Angle

    Garett and Angle have a five minute challenge match which I assume (and you know what they say about assuming) will make Bitchoff (not my words but Angle’s) look good. And I guess that old adiom about is right not only does Garett look good but it also hypes Hardy vs Angle this Sunday when Hardy comes out to save Garett when Angle who’s angry about not beating Garett in time locks him in the ankle lock.

    The Two Robs are interviewed by Wonder Years and talk about the upcoming open invitational. Yeah TV title on the line and the person is random. Here’s to an eventual title change so we can have some actual competiton. One can hope right.

    James Storm vs Gunner:

    Here are two back woods southern wrestlers on the opposing sides of the heel/face tangent. What we have so far is a good match between two competitors with Bully Ray egging on the Gunner. But Gunner gets the job done and by that he takes a Last Call to the face. Making James Storm look strong going into Victory Road.

    Sting and Bobby Roode have their contract signing which is where Roode rips into Sting with all his worth for a good 8 minutes. All the while Sting sits patiently listening untl Bobby turns to leave. Sting flips the table over kicks over the chairs and puts on his makeup and attacks the champion. And while beating on the Roode he applies his trademark black paint to Roode’s face. After Roode scurries out of the ring face ashen from the paint sting gets enpowered by his attack.

    Well here’s to Victory Road.

     

  3. Raw Is Dedicated to Mr. Peppermint 9-26-11

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    For those of you who have no idea who Mr. Peppermint is, click here. His show, Peppermint Palace, was on every Saturday morning on ABC at 6 (or 5, I don’t remember). His show meant Saturday morning cartoons were going to start. And that was back when you didn’t have Nick Jr. or Cartoon Network. This was the highlight of your week. So a moment of silence and respect to Mr. Peppermint.

     

    We have some questions from last week’s Raw. What will come of “on-fire” Alberto del Rio? What of Miz and Truth being fired? What injury will Tony Romo suffer? What indy promotion do I want to get next and do a review on? (I’m thinking Chikara.)

     

    We start off with Triple H. I look at upcoming Chikara and AAW shows. My AIW show is on its way. Triple H was interrupted by Vickie Guerrero. And yet, people still booed her. Ziggler sounded really good. Ziggler and Triple H played off each other really well. Then Cody Rhodes interrupted. And then Christian interrupted. Christian gets lots of matches. Ziggler fights Zack Ryder. Cody Rhodes gets a Battle Royal.

     

    This was a pretty good fast Battle Royal. Cody Rhodes retained.

     

    After the break, Super Dave Osborne is talking to “Not-so-Super” David Otunga. Apparently, he is still a lawyer even if he’s not practicing. Oh, the stupid… It burns.

     

    We got a tag match. Nattie/Beth vs. Eve/Kelly. We got a Kelly Kelly video package. We need more of these. The crowd actually seemed to care about this match. Beth pinned the champion. Hopefully we get Beth winning more. Her and Nattie are a really good duo.

     

    Mark Henry took apart Great Khali. It was an awesome image and added credibility to his tear of destruction.

     

    John Cena cut a promo. Kansas City thought he was the Chiefs because there were some cheers, but a lot more boos. Then Del Rio came out ringside. Del Rio was doing commentary with his wrestling tights on. Then Punk came out with his announcer’s jacket. This match ended in a DQ. This was the best way to do this. Christian didn’t lose.

     

    We got Zack Ryder vs. Dolph Ziggler. We got to plug Hugh Jackman’s film. Ziggler looked really good in this match. Due to some outside interference by Jack Swagger, we got a tainted Ziggler victory. Air Boom came to Ryder’s rescue.

     

    Teddy Long made a match: AirBoom/Ryder vs. Swagger/Ziggler in a handicap match. This was a fun match. The crowd was really into it. Vickie went out and found a soon-to-be-suspended Mason Ryan, affectionately known as “Matista.” He’s a heel still. As soon as Mason Ryan was tagged it, he was a heel no more. He took out Team Vickie. Why did he do that? Interesting question.

     

    Not-so-Super David Otunga is talking to the boys in the locker room. He’s creating a lawsuit. I like this. It’s creating an interesting storyline.

     

    Our main event was ADR vs. CM Punk. This was a really decent match. Punk won. Then the cage lowered. Punk and Cena destroyed Ricardo Rodriguez and then ADR destroyed the other two with a chair.

     

    This was a pretty good Raw, but then again, I DVR’d it so I didn’t have to sit through the stuff I didn’t want to see. But a lot of questions are raised. And I’m really digging the build-up for Hell in a Cell.

     

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  4. Impact Wrestling Review August 25, 2011

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    It starts with Kurt Angle calling out Crimson who is now wearing a knee brace. Angle compliments Crimson for his courage for standing up for him but then insults him. Promises to end his career. Heel turns always make sense in TNA.  Yeah the jobber squad oh I mean Immortal come out for the weekly promo. Bully Ray proceeds to <suck> Kurt Angle’s ego with his accomplishments. Kurt tells them no interference on the part of Immortal and especially from Jeff Jarrett. <Mexican endorses Jarrett?> And a promo backstage from Jackie, ODB and Velvet they’re working together in a match against Angelina, Winter and Madison Rayne. Do I see a swerve coming on the part of ODB? Yes I do.

    Only in the Russoverse

    Eric B. Hogan and Flair talk about the craziness that is the joke…er Sting. I can’t wait for Bound for Glory.

    He could so sue. Why so nervous Sting

    So yeah I was wrong it was Sarita and Rosita. Anywho.

    five minutes later and I am still screaming what the —– It was like watching some surreal dream where everyone knew how to wrestle except the one who scored the pin. Velvet appears to be struggling to look relevant surrounded by vets and better experienced wrestlers. So instead of a double cross swerve we are treated to a face turn from Jackie and ODB, who double team suplex Angelina and drag Velvet over for the win.

    nuff said

    The X division. We have Kid Kash coming out to face Jesse Sorensen. In the beginning of an obvious feud. So the bad boy of the original X division is now going to be jobbing out to the varsity wrestler? We will have to wait and see. So after holding the tights of Sorensen he heelishly wins. After a wonderful heel promo we have personality. I like. By putting in Aries and Kash they have brought in wonderful talents who can work a crowd. So waiting to see these guys in a live event again.

    Bound for Glory series. Love the vignettes of the house shows.  Crimson, Bully Ray Bobby Roode tied for 2nd, James Storm and Gunner round out the top four.

    the Pope vs RvD, the crowd is behind Rob. Oh do I miss the days when Pope would have brought the house down. what a difference a feud makes. First Samoa now this inane drama with Devon’s family. Watching Pope get beat on is as enjoyable as watching Lavar Burton getting whipped in Roots.<its okay I’m black> And surprising like Akunta Kinta he taps out and agrees to be called Toby. Rob Van Dam beats Pope with a surfboard. RvD is now tied with Gunner for fourth. OH here comes sore loser Samoa Joe. Devon take his sweet time walking out to slowly scare away Joe. Can’t wait for the Pope vs Devon match that is so coming for Bound for Glory. <sarcasm>

    Even after all he sacrificed Levar shakes his head as the Pope has set us back 400 years.

    Robbie E. and Rob Terry have a promo were he asked him to be his bodyguard. Immortal backstage working out there arms and have a semi comic unscripted confrontation. Rosita and Sarita jump Love until Winter shows up and chokes out Rosita Hogan and Flair waddle out the ring.

    Traci Brooks and a Eric B promo, who is trying <sarcasm> his hardest not to look down her shirt.

    The two stooges come out to call out Sting. Its akin to watching Grumpy Old Men 3: The wrestling Years. Well they call out the Clown Prince  of wrestling.

    Flair says tit and I think yeah, family show. So watching these men quack enough crazy to make the Robert Young Clinic call for more beds. And its official Sting vs Hogan at BFG.

    If you’re over 50, yeah get a crazy gimmick. Good to Know.

    Thank God A.J. Styles, I have never been so happy to see a redneck in my life. He calls out Daniels. Can we say sore loser. Can he never give up is he like the Vegeta to A.J’s Goku? Of course inquiring minds want to know. Daniels questions does he have what it takes to be in TNA? The fallen Angel is crying and the crowd boos and shouts the Brisco Brothers infamous “man-up” Pity something this audience could care less about. After Days of our Lives we now return to

    yep had the same reaction when Daniels was crying.

    Immortal versus Fortune….a special BFG event. No rules. Gunner, Steiner and Ray come out only to get attacked by Storm, Styles and Roode, can we say brawl. After a series of spots, Ray pins A.J Styles for the win. Bully Ray picks up 7 points.

    Mr Anderson shows up in a hummer. And comes to the ring. takes out Steiner and Gunner, Ray and Abyss wonder to the back in confusion.

    Mickie James is angry, and can’t get into words what the hell Russo’s booking has caused her. Because evil lesbian witches are not cool. And neither is the TV title being worn by Young who is on the hunt for D lister Scott Baio. <God> Young pins Baio after jumping from a tree for the three. Next.

    Crimson vs Angle.

    This match was decent, it does include Angle who could have a match with a corpse and make it believable. But just when we might have a decision Samoa Joe comes to attack Crimson after a mini beat down Crimson comes back and clears the ring of Joe, since Angle left a minute ago.

    Will Tracy become the knockout Law? Will Mickie beat Winter? Will Daniels finally overcome A.J tune in next week and see. In a post match segment Joe beats and cripples Crimson.

    Here is to next week in front of hopeful a live crowd.

  5. Impact Wrestling or how I see TNA in theory pt 1

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    The news has been hitting the fan for weeks and now it was finally confirmed on May 12th. TNA is now Impact Wrestling. Watching the event unfold before my eyes as The Network, Mick Foley proclaimed “Impact is wrestling” telling Hogan and his cohorts that the politics have ended. I smiled as I thought of a happier time in TNA history. The year was 2006, as I was streaming through all the on demand selections skimming the porn and sport selections, I was stopped in my tracks by a wrestling event called TNA: No Surrender. What could this be? And better yet how much would this cost?

    Well folks for $24.99, I watched a company impress. Jackass antics aside TNA gave me some intriguing matches. LAX w/ Konnan vs AJ Styles/Christopher Daniels, Senshi vs Chris Sabin and the wrestler who left a impressive mark…Eric Young. Wearing his white tights with a censorship bar over the word “Fire”.  It would continue to impress next month when I watched Bound for Glory. Eric Young was there so was Daniels/AJ, LAX and the match of the night Chris Sabin vs Senshi. A four star match that left both men forever immortalized in my brain.

    I became a fanatic. I bought “The Best of the X Division” 2 pack, watched TNA Impact on Spike, where Christian was speared through a steel cage by Rhyno. Mouth dropped as I watched the end of a feud that left Christian victorious albeit Rhyno was avenged. Then after a year I went away every once in a while I’d stop in to see how the program was progressing. And then 2010 happened and I see Hogan on my screen in a four sided ring telling the audience that big changes are about to unfold. I was unimpressed. All I saw was old dudes (ea friends of Hogan collecting a paycheck) I lost faith and didn’t look back for about six months or so. When I returned all was  the same except some of the old dudes remained. Namely Hogan and a Silver haired Bischoff. Now TNA had become WCW: 2010 with endless promos to open the show followed by two minute matches then right behind that would be more promos and another five minute match. The endless cycle was monotonous. That is also when I became a devotee to the Internet Wrestling Community. Reading how much folks would argue with one another over what was the definition of TNA or how whether or not the veterans were either hurting or bettering the product was astonishing. I didn’t know how to respond, depending on what site you’re on it could be the difference from being called a troll or mark. People attitudes were as intense as the old comic book argument of who was faster Superman or the Flash.

    Now here we are in May, TNA has decided to push wrestling over promos. What went through my head was all the talent that are on the roster and all the epic matches and smaller lead ins using the reaction cam could bring to the overall product. Taking the best of 2002-2009 and mixing it with what was decent or innovative about 2010-2011(so far).

    Here’s where my wrestling theory kicks in.

    After Sacrifice and Slammiversary, iMPACT Wrestling should start building up the future while deconstructing the past year and change.  First should come the end of Immortal. Not right away but with Hogan’s power null in void we can watch as the group slowly implodes. Leading to either Hogan or Flair taking on Impact caretaker Sting. In a loser leaves Impact Wrestling at Bound for Glory.

    That is the end result of Bischoff/ Hogan regime, but before that in the three months leading up to that landmark moment we should see the X division wrestlers get their revenge on Bischoff. July 10th is Destination X. We should see the division rise from the ashes like a phoenix. Led in part by Max Buck and Brian Kendrick, who documented performance in the ring and outside of it has shown that they could definitely steer the course of the next generation of talent. This of course could allow Kaz to get back into heel territory were he does his best work.

    Kaz as a man surrounded, relentlessly holding on to the X gold . Kendrick, The Bucks, Sangrieto and Suicide all jockeying for his title. By giving these characters personalities the fans will care. Bring in Traci Brooks as his right hand woman snagging him victories against them.  Use the Reaction Cam in short (and by short i mean two to three minutes) explaining their reasons for participating in the X division using each wrestlers personality to showcase how they differ from each other. This would add to the importance of the belt. More could be added with the World X Cup. More on that on another article. This of course is a small sample of the thoughts running through my mind. But then it jumped to Orlando Jordan.

    Orlando Jordan. Yes, that Orlando Jordan. When he first debuted he represented someone different than the stereotypical “black” wrestler, he  wasn’t a gang banger,pimp or extremist militant. He was instead a bi-sexual male who wanted to wrestler and be accepted by his peers. At first he was entertaining and then became a joke of epic proportions. With his brain damaged partner/lover? Eric Young he has become one half of a dreaded jobber team. There for simple entertainment. Nothing much else. I’m more offended by this then by John Cena’s playful middle school comments. Here is someone who came in with an original idea for a wrestler and has been given squat. Instead what they should do is put him in singles territory with a female valet. What has So Cal Val been up to in the past two plus years?  Secondly have Bully Ray make Orlando Jordan’s life miserable which leads to a feud for acceptance. The simplest promoter could conceive this.

    And then it touched on Eric Young. Again. Here is a man who when presented with a gimmick he takes it and runs with it. No matter how asinine. He is a good little soldier and follows orders. But where has that positioned him? Earlier in 2009-2010 he was being pushed as a leader. A heel leader in charge of World Elite. You couldn’t help but think of a man who would of brought great feuds to the forefront. Especially against former tag partner Robert Roode. Then he fell off the turnbuckle onto the floor below and now we have “Idiot Savant” Eric Young. The dream had been crushed. Where can he go from here? Simple. Last Thursday, Eric Young stole Gunner’s Television title. I could see a swift kick in the head would straighten Eric out to fight for the former Global title. Maybe even a three way between him, Gunner and Daniels. The thoughts ceased for a bit.

    What was presented was this somewhat garbled article that I hope to continue in a serial format. Giving you sneak peeks into my brain in regards to the Television, tag team and World title picture. Even the Knockouts brought something to mind. But for now I better slow down before I have a novella on my hands.

    Part 2 should be on its way soon.

  6. ThinkSoJoE’s Thoughts: Rumble edition!

    2 Comments

    Yours truly with my live (on tape) Rumble Thoughts:

    World Heavyweight Championship Match:  Edge vs. Dolph Ziggler

    Tony Chimel has finally gotten through puberty – his voice didn’t crack when he announced Edge as “The Rated R Superstar”

    I absolutely cannot buy Dolph Ziggler as a legit challenger for the World Heavyweight Championship when he still looks like a knockoff dyslexic Billy Gunn (Ziggler has a backwards D and a backwards Z on his tights).

    A 16:9 aspect ratio on a computer monitor is wonderful for doing BWF stuff because I can watch the show on one side of the screen while typing on the other, and I’ve still got a pretty decent sized picture.

    Can I get the “NICKY” Spirit Squad graphic that G used a couple weeks back for Ziggler?  I can?  Awesome!

    Is that a “Let’s Go Ziggler” chant?  What are these people seeing that I’m not?

    And Edge kicks out of the FameAsser, or whatever Ziggler calls it.

    See Edge, if you would’ve hooked the tights, you would’ve won there.  It’s like Jesse Ventura always says, “Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat.”

    Kelly Kelly??  Please don’t ruin Edge with a Kelly Kelly angle!

    Has anybody EVER won a championship with a sleeper?  Can somebody look into that for me?

    Hmm.  No Vicky.  No referee.  Hmm.  I wonder what could happen now?

    Yep.  SPEAR!  Jesse Ventura would be proud.

    Killswitch?!?!?!?  That reeks of awesomeness!  Edge Wins!

    And Chimel’s voice cracks, making the first point I made in this match null and void.

    —

    WWE Championship:  The Miz vs. Randy Orton

    Wait, what?  World Heavyweight Championship match first, WWE Championship match next – it’s gotta be the Royal Rumble!  And an Angry Miz Girl shot in the buildup video!

    We get a Miz interview!  Awesome!  Ooh, and a shot at the Patriots!

    Hey, they got it right this time – the challenger is coming to the ring first!

    I like Miz’s trench coat better than mine.  I wonder if he’d trade me.

    Michael Cole’s commentary on the Miz reminds me of Bobby Heenan’s commentary on Ric Flair back in the day.  Back when things weren’t often “Fair to Flair.”

    I’d venture to say that A-Ry is going to be in the Rumble match, since he’s in his wrestling gear.

    I wonder if the announcers realize that winning a title match at Royal Rumble doesn’t mean you’re going to WrestleMania – there’s still Elimination Chamber next month.

    The voice of the WWE?  I miss JR.

    Can we get one of those old Batman graphics?  Orton hitting his skull on the ringpost?  KAARRR-AAAACK!

    Nexus?!?!?  Holy crap, Mason Ryan does look like Batista!

    Nice dive out of the way by Chad Patton.

    And Punk with the assist!

    King isn’t the only one who doesn’t understand this – I have no idea why Nexus helped Miz win.

    Actually, here’s a thought – A-Ry was on NXT with Harris and McGuillicutty.  Perhaps he’s joined Nexus to help The Miz?

    —

    Cody Rhodes has dropped out of the Rumble because his face has been shattered by Rey Mysterio.

    The fans in Boston think John Cena, Sheamus, Alberto Del Rio, Big Show, Wade Barrett, CM Punk, Rey Mysterio, Santino, Drew McIntyre, and Kofi Kingston are going to win the Royal Rumble.  Apparently.

    —

    WWE Divas Championship:  LayCool vs. Natalya

    Ugh.  I just wanna get to the Rumble.  In the wo…

    Ha!  Cole got stuck!

    And now we’ve got a Fatal Four Way:  Natalya vs. Layla vs. Michelle McCool vs… Eve?!?

    We couldn’t get Kong?!?

    —

    WWE Divas Championship:  Natalya vs. Layla vs. Michelle McCool vs. Eve

    Why Eve?  Didn’t we start something with Gail Kim on RAW this week?  She couldn’t be in here?  Again, it’s the WWE using Gail Kim in a way that says, “she’s only on our roster so TNA can’t have her.”

    Has the Double Sharpshooter ever been done before?  I think I saw Natalya use it before.

    Cole and Lawler are acting like they don’t know about Taka Michinoku, when both of them were in WWE while he was.  Indeed!

    Wait – so did Eve win?  I’m confused.  Where’s the GM?  Michelle had Natalya pinned at the same time!

    Guess he doesn’t want LayCool on RAW either.

    —

    Oh look, there’s Gail Kim now!  She’s with Daniel Bryan who is talking about how cool it would be to win the Rumble.  The Bellas apologize to the two of them, then insult them.  Eve is the Divas Champion, and Gail Kim is fighting with the Bellas backstage.  Once again. Say it with me, kids:  “She’s only on our roster so TNA can’t have her.”

    —

    Is it time?!?  Huh???  Is it?!?  I don’t care about the Elimination Chamber PPV next month – I just want to see the Rumble match!  Kudos to Matt Striker for pointing out that “Paul Revere” is also the title of a Beastie Boys song.

    Rumble by the numbers – that means it’s almost time!

    —

    “Ladies and Gentlemen, it is now time… for the BIGGEST ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH in history!”  Hooray!

    CM Punk is number one?!?  New Nexus has their work cut out for them helping him win tonight.  Hopefully we’ll get Punk cutting promos between eliminations again this year, I loved that last year!

    Wade Barrett?!?  Or is it Zeke?  Oh crap, The Corre just surrounded the ring!  Where’s Nexus?  There they are!  WTF is going on?

    The GM says to stop.  The only superstar who has the right to be in the ring is CM Punk.  Everybody else needs to GTFO or they’re out of the Rumble.

    And a CM Punk chant breaks out as Daniel Bryan makes his way out, a former member of Nexus himself.

    How awesome is it that we get 90 seconds of Punk and Bryan?  The fans in Boston love it too!

    Justin Gabriel officially in.  Uh oh….  450 on Punk?  Nope, he missed.  Bryan dumps him and we’re back to Punk/Bryan!

    Oh, radio, tell me everything you know…  At least I got to hear a bit of Zack Ryder’s theme!  And two eliminations for Bryan – more Punk/Bryan!

    William Regal!  More great technical expertise in the ring!  Punk/Regal/Bryan!

    The ring’s filling up, who’s number 7?  JoMo!

    Holy shit!  Morrison is FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!

    And Regal got dumped by DiBiase in the meantime.

    Yoshi Tatsu?  He still works here?

    Husky Harris here to help!

    Oooh, Jobbo!  Bets on which one goes out first, Guerrero or Tatsu.  I got Guerrero.

    Jobbo hits two suplexes on three straight guys, then the Three Amigos on Bryan.

    Mizark Henry out next.  And he tosses Chavo.  I win!

    And then Tatsu goes, also courtesy of Mark Henry.

    JTG is bringin’ the hood to the Royal Rumble!

    Lucky number 13 is Michael McGuillicutty, here to join his Nexus mates CM Punk and Husky Harris in battle, and he eliminates JTG.

    Harris and McGuillicutty eliminate DiBiase as Chris Masters makes his entrance.

    Why would Masters want to jump right into the middle of the New Nexus members that are in the ring?  Of course, he gets Punk in the Masterlock and almost eliminates him before McGuillicutty saves the day.

    David Otunga joins Nexus in the Rumble, and immediately, Punk eliminates Bryan, and Masters, while Nexus quadruple team Morrison out.  It’s Nexus and Mark Henry in the ring, and they dump the World’s Strongest Man as well.

    Tyler Reks runs into the ring where The New Nexus are waiting.  Thanks for coming, Tyler!

    Next victim:  Vladimir Kozlov.  He gets a good shot on Punk, but The Nexus gang up on him and take him down.  Harris hits his finisher, and Punk tosses him.  Nexus still standing tall.

    Next victim:  R-Truth.  He barely makes it into the ring before Nexus swarm on him.  Punk his the knee/bulldog combo in the corner, stopping to mock Truth in the meantime.  R-Truth, gone.  Nexus stand tall.

    Next victim:  The Great Khali!  He’s back!  He takes his time to get to the ring, he manages to hold his own, even eliminating Husky Harris.  Khali taking care of Nexus as number 20 gets set to come out…

    But it’s Mason Ryan!  Nexus is back at four men in the ring, but Khali gets the upperhand.  Momentarily.  Ryan eliminates Khali, and the Nexus stand tall again.

    CAN YOU DIG IT, SUCKA!!!

    The six time World Champion, Booker T has arrived here in the Royal Rumble!  He manages to hold his own against the Nexus, even hitting the scissor kick on Otunga before McGuillicutty attacks – and gets dropped with a bookend…

    SPINAROONIE!!!!!

    Mason Ryan saves CM Punk from elimination and dumps Booker T.  Nexus still strong.

    BRRRRRRRRRRRAPPLEJUICE!  John Cena is here to take on The Nexus!  Cena eliminates Mason Ryan, he gets Otunga and McGillicutty, and it’s down to John Cena and CM Punk!

    With Punk and Cena down, entry number 23 enters – it’s Hornswoggle!?!

    Punk sees Hornswoggle, who tells Punk to bring it.  He catches a knee from Punk who goes back to work on Cena.  He tries to eliminate Cena, but Cena reverses it into an AA over the top rope!  Cena’s eliminated, single handedly, 4 of the 5 New Nexus members!  Cena and Hornswoggle stand tall!

    Tyson Kidd has no chance here.  Hornswoggle and Cena double team Kidd, and Hornswoggle hits an Attitude Adjustment!  You can’t see Hornswoggle!  You can’t see Kidd either, since Cena tossed him out.

    Heath Slater, no stranger to John Cena, is representing the Corre.  Hornswoggle hit Sweet Shin Music and a Stunner on Slater, and Swoggle and Cena hit a double 5 knuckle shuffle, and Horny nails the Tadpole Splash.  Thanks for coming, Heath Slater!  Cena and Swoggle are rolling here!

    BOOM!  BOOM!  BOOM!  Friday Night SmackDown’s Intercontinental Champion is fired up and ready to go!  Cena and Kingston look at the WrestleMania sign, and it looks like we’re set for a friendly competition here.  Kingston’s offense stuns Cena.

    Jack Swagger has drawn Number 27, the lucky number in the Royal Rumble match, at least in the past.  He hits Cena and Kingston with Vader Bombs, but lets himself get distracted by Swoggle.  Kingston hits a Boom Drop on Swagger off the back of Hornswoggle.

    Sheamus joins the fray.  Hornswoggle tries to form an alliance with Sheamus, to no avail.  He tunes up the band, and hits Sweet Shin Music for the second time in this match.  Cena saves Swoggle, but gets socked by Swagger.  Swoggle gets Brogue Kicked by Sheamus out of this match.

    Rey Mysterio jumps in, a former Rumble Winner himself, and he takes everybody out, but gets clotheslined by Sheamus before he could hit the 619 on Swagger.

    Swagger gets 619ed out of the match by Mysterio.

    Wade Barrett represents the Corre at number 30.

    Dolph Ziggler is still beat up from his World Heavyweight Title match earlier as he enters at number 31 – the very first number 31 entrant in Royal Rumble history!

    BIG DADDY COOL DIESEL!!!  Number 32 is freakin’ Diesel!!

    Drew McIntyre joins the growing number of men in the ring.  A “Let’s Go Diesel” chant breaks out.

    Diesel gets hit with a 619 by Rey Mysterio.  And in true Kevin Nash fashion, he no-sells it.

    AWESOME!!!  But it’s not The Miz in the Royal Rumble, it’s Alex Riley!

    Diesel gets eliminated by Wade Barrett.

    The Big Show walks slowly toward the ring, stopping to eyeball Diesel as Matt Striker makes references to Boston Bruins defensemen Zdeno Chara being the tallest player in the NHL and shorter than The Big Show.

    Show sends Ziggler packing.

    Barrett gets some assistance in the form of Ezekiel Jackson, as Drew McIntyre gets dumped by the Big Show.

    Speaking of Big Show, that’s who Zeke eliminates.

    IT’S-A HE!  SANTINO!  Beware the Cobra!  He catches a Brogue Kick from Sheamus and rolls under the bottom rope to the floor.

    Alberto Del Rio enters the Rumble in a 2008 Bentley, and gets a ring announcement from Ricardo Rodriguez.

    Matt Striker mentions that Alex Riley has been eliminated, but I’m not so sure about that.  Randy Orton’s music hits and he attacks Del Rio, who hadn’t made it to the ring yet.  He nails several RKOs before eliminating Kingston and Sheamus.

    The two men standing at the moment:  John Cena, and Randy Orton.  They gaze at the WrestleMania sign, but before they can go at it, Kane, making his 13th straight Rumble appearance, enters at number 40!

    Hmm.  No Triple H?

    Ezekiel Jackson eliminated by Kane.

    Kane by Mysterio, followed by Mysterio by Barrett.

    Apparently Santino and Riley are gone, despite neither one of them, from my vantage point, being thrown over the top rope to the floor.  The final four – Barrett, Orton, Cena, and Del Rio.

    Orton and Cena start going at it with Barrett and Del Rio down.  Cena goes for an AA, but Barrett stops him.

    Cena hits the AA on Del Rio, but A-Ry distracts Cena, as Miz dumps Cena over the top rope!  Barrett, Del Rio, and Orton are left!

    Orton eliminates Barrett – and Del Rio sneaks up behind and eliminates Orton!

    The referee tells Del Rio that he hasn’t won.  Santino was never eliminated.  He nails the Cobra!  Throw him out, Santino!

    Santino tries, but Del Rio turns the tide and tosses Santino.  Alberto Del Rio is going to WrestleMania!

  7. SmackDown 10/22/10

    3 Comments

    It’s the go home show before Bragging Rights – Does SmackDown Know the Enemy?  Indeed, it’s RAW, and tonight the Monday Night superstars invade the Blue Brand!  It’s Randy Orton vs. Kane in our Main Event tonight, and the two teams for Bragging Rights kick things off in the ring as Teddy Long presides over them.

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  8. WWE Elimination Chamber 2010 results

    1 Comment

    Alright folks, the former No Way Out is now the Elimination Chamber, and following the opening video and pyro, the WWE is wasting no time getting started (ok, they are, but I want to get started, dammit), and neither are we!

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  9. WWE Superstars 12/24/09

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    Hey folks, ThinkSoJoE here, filling in for tharvey1 who is on vacation this week.

    You’d better watch out, you’d better not cry, you’d better not pout, I’m tellin’ you why.  Santa Claus is comin’ to town – and hopefully, he won’t be singing “What’s Up” as he comes down your chimney.  It’s Christmas Eve, it’s 8PM, and it’s on a network I don’t get, so we’re bootlegging it* for WWE Superstars!

    *BoredWrestlingFan does not condone or endorse illegal downloads – but, since this show will be up on Hulu in a few days, I suppose it doesn’t matter this time.  Hello, Mr. McDevitt!

    (more…)

  10. WWE Superstars Review

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    What’s up, my Peeps?!  Hope all is well in your world.  I’m back following an absence last week…sorry.  While I may be a tad tardy to the party this week, this review is getting done.  And here…we…go!

    Match 1:  Kelly Kelly vs Gail Kim

    I think everybody knows how I feel about diva wrestling by now.  Thus, you just get the results here.  Kelly Kelly defeats Gail Kim.  I think Gail turns on Sunday.  Raw needs another heel diva.

    Match 2:  Ezekiel Jackson and Vladimir Kozlov vs Tommy Dreamer and Golddust

    I like Big Zeke and Golddust, but could care less about the other two.  The finish sees Dreamer hit Kozlov from behind and Golddust hits the Flatline for the win.  After the match, Jackson and Kozlov attack Tommy and the Bizzarre One.  Zeke is a future World Champ IMO!

    Main Event:  Matt Hardy and R-Truth vs Drew McIntyre and Eric Escobar

    Matt looks really fat in those tights that he insists on wearing to the ring every week.  R-Truth should be an IC title contender.  Drew McIntyre is pure gold.  Eric Escobar IS fat.  McIntyre hits Hardy with his DDT for the win.  They are intent on pushing their young talent on Smackdown…catch a hint RAW!

    That’s it for this week everybody.  Peace!!!