Smackdown 11/15/13
1 CommentIntroduction goes here, I guess.
Oh and make sure you check out BWF Radio this Sunday where we celebrate our second episode in one hundred years! It’s going to be a show!
Hopping time…
Introduction goes here, I guess.
Oh and make sure you check out BWF Radio this Sunday where we celebrate our second episode in one hundred years! It’s going to be a show!
Hopping time…
Same as before; tired, eating lunch, yadda yadda. Reading out the reviews on the air makes me realise how much unnecessary stuff I put in them. Still leranin folks, bear with me.
Ugh. I’m not really in the mood for this show right now. Let’s see if the show can turn that around. Let’s roll.
I watch 30 minutes of RAW, leave for work, and watch the rest while I write this recap. The only rule is that Kodos must appear at some point in the review. Also, screw you, SmackDown review!
Here are the results from this weeks Main Event program: (more…)
Here are this weeks Results for Main Event this week: (more…)
Here’s the results from the latest edition of ROH TV hot off the presses since this episode ended just minutes ago: (more…)
Welcome friends, it is I, ThinkSoJoE, returning to review the flagship show of the WWE while RYTMAN attends to some family issues. Before I get started, I’d like to send my well wishes to RYTMAN and his family in these trying times. Your job is waiting for you when you get back, bud.
I watch 30 minutes of RAW, leave for work, and avoid spoilers like the plague. Not the character BWF Radio’s Jorge played in the band Dead Before Dawn, the one that killed a bunch of people in the middle ages. Then I watch the show while I’m sitting around doing nothing else of note at work. That’s how ThinkSoJoE’s RAW reviews work.
Let’s do things a bit differently this week.
MATCH RESULTS
• CM PUNK VS BIG SHOW – NO CONTEST: It’s basically Big Show dominating, with Punk fighting back from behind until Daniel Bryan comes out in a full mad-on. Bryan slaps the “no” lock on Punk and Show joins in for a “little rough up the champ” action until Cena makes the save. AJ comes out and pulls a “Teddy,” making a tag match for later in the night.
• RYBACK DEFEATS JTG – This was in response to JTG griping backstage about not getting TV time. It’s the same match we’ve seen for about… ever.
• R-TRUTH DEFEATS HEATH SLATER – After the match, the PTP (minus AW) run in for a beat down on R-Truth. Kofi supposedly is out of the country, leaving Truth outnumbered.
• SIN CARA DEF TENSAI – Tensai spends most of the match overpowering Sin Cara, until the Lucha legend side-steps him into Sakamoto and hits a DDT from the top rope. Tensai beats down Sakamoto after the match.
• DOLPH ZIGGLER DEF JERICHO/THE MIZ (3-WAY) – Jericho won a twitter poll to be the guest on Piper’s Pit. After a few minutes, Ziggler and Vicki come out to run Jericho down. Miz joins in and tries to kick Piper and Jericho out. After Jericho cleans house, we get a commercial break. When we come back, we’re told AJ made this match via twitter. Dolph gets the pin on the Miz.
• LAYLA & KAITLYN DEF EVE & BETH PHOENIX – Pretty standard tag, with Layla actually trying to show some personality. (Nice spot with Layla butt-bumping Eve in the face.) Ends with Kait rolling Beth up for a three count.
• JOHN CENA & CM PUNK DEF BIG SHOW & DANIEL BRYAN – Interesting theme here. NO ONE wants to tag out on either side. Bryan tags in whenever Show gets close. Show gets more and more bothered. Cena tags in whenever Punk gets close. Punk returns in kind. Punk and Cena do the “stealing each other’s moves,” routine, and eventually both Show AND Punk wash their hands of the whole thing. It ends with an AA on Bryan for the pin, and Punk rescuing (?) Cena from an attack from behind by Big Show.
• DAMIEN SANDOW DEF CHRISTIAN – I have NEVER seen Christian jobbed out like this. Christian gets in an elbow shot from the top rope, but when he follows Sandow outside to the floor, and gets sent into the steps, Sandow bounces his head against the steel steps. Brodus Clay hobbles out on his bum leg to distract Sandow, but all Christian gets is a roll-up for two. Sandow ends this with his neck-breaker variation.
Okay so, why the new approach? Well one, I’m sick of being up till three in the morning trying to recap EVERY segment in detail, and two, I wanted to get that stuff out of the way for my 1st official…
RYTMAN RANT!
Re: This show’s pacing, W.T.F?
Here’s the deal, we have Shawn Michaels guest starring tonight. Apparently, Triple H’s flight was delayed, and he’s not there yet, so Shawn is scared. Every segment is Shawn looking over his shoulder like Daffy Duck during duck season, waiting for his inevitable Brock Beat-down. Eventually, Shawn is in the ring with Brock and Paul Heyman, and Hunter rolls in just in the nick of time to protect Shawn (which is a whole other thing) and sign the contract. Brock signs and leaves. Perfect spot to end the show…
Except we have 15-20 minutes left.
Okay so, umm… commercial break!
And we’re back. Well, okay… let’s have a shot of Shawn and Hunter having a heart to heart that ends with Shawn walking off possibly pissed at Hunter. And we’re out!
No we are not.
Hoo-boy, okay-commercial… and interview Big Show about going into Summerslam-WAITAMINUTE! SOMETHINGS HAPPENING IN THE PARKING LOT! Heyman is blocking Shawn’s car with his car. They’re yelling at each other, AND LESNAR GRABS SHAWN! The camera goes black and we hear Lesnar beating down Shawn.
Okay, end on a cliff-hanger; what happened to Shawn? Good, we’re out-no we’re not.
We come back from commercial (notice a pattern?) to see Hunter and everyone else who wanted some extra camera time worrying about Shawn. We cut back to ringside where Lesnar has Shawn up in a fireman’s carry and is walking to the ring. Shawn takes the F-5 and as Hunter runs to the rescue, Lesnar locks on the arm-breaker. Heyman warns Hunter not to take another step, or Lesnar breaks Shawn’s arm; which he does anyway. Raw ends FOR REAL with trainers trying to help Shawn, and Lesnar running away with an evil grin on his face.
And Raw comes in at 10:01 p.m. here in Chicago.
Seriously
We honestly couldn’t have Shawn get beaten up at the beginning of the show? We couldn’t put this contract signing crap in the middle of the show and get it over with in time for (what should’ve been) the main event? Did you guys try SO HARD to end on time that you wound up short? Could you have given that extra time to, maybe Christian/Sandow?
This was a HUGE step backwards, I’m sorry, it is. You went from going overtime with the Main Events over the last two weeks, to going under trying to make time for a stupid segment that you had to strrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeetch out with false endings to fill up time THAT YOU TOOK AWAY FROM THE MATCHES!
(Sigh)
Seriously WWE, re-evaluate your damn priorities before Raw goes the Nitro route.
Cancelled
We open with a recap of last Monday when AJ gave John Cena and Big Show both the title shot at C.M. Punk at Summerslam.
RAW GM AJ Lee is out first to give us a rundown of big matches she’s lined up tonight, including Randy Orton vs. The Big Show, and John Cena vs. Daniel Brian.
C.M. Punk comes out to apologize for yelling at her last week, saying everybody makes mistakes, like AJ did last week making the Summerslam match a three-way. Punk tries to weasel out of the match. When AJ refuses to change the card, Punk accuses her of trying to get back at him for turning down her marriage proposal.
John Cena comes out. He talks about how Punk has become one of those guys that demand respect instead of earning it. He mentions that he’s won 11 world titles and still has to fight for respect, and mentions how the odds are against him in a three way.
Side Note: Crowd could be 60% Cena.
Big Show heads for the ring. AJ puts the kibosh on the proceedings and suggests everyone save their aggression for their respective matches tonight. Punk demands that he get a match tonight as well. AJ agrees, but she’ll let the WWE universe pick Punk’s opponent via twitter vote.
#Mysterio
#Kane
#TheMiz
Later tonight, Triple H confronts Brock Lesnar
We come back from a commercial break; and Jerry Lawler announces Rey Mysterio as the winner on twitter.
WWE CHAMPION VS C.M. PUNK
It’s a relatively slow-paced, high-spot trade-off. It ends when Mysterio hits the 619 but lands a splash attempt on Punk’s knees. Punk hits the GTS.
WINNER: C.M. PUNK
Backstage: Alberto Del Rio and Roberto Rodriguez pull up in a Ferrari. Del Rio barks at RR to pull a table out of his way so he can park. ADR and RR leave the car unattended.
COMMERCIAL
Promo: Wade Barret is coming back.
Backstage: Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez kiss up to AJ. She agrees to give Alberto the night off; until he digs on Ricardo for saying she might do something crazy. The “c” word gets her riled up and she books Alberto in a match up next. Alberto yells at RR to get his gear.
Later tonight, HBK-the heartbreak kid-Shawn Michaels will make a special guest appearance tonight!
Christian is in the ring as RR introduces ADR; who is still dressing on his way to the ring. We recap the Sheamus/Del Rio feud, going back to Del Rio slamming a car hood on Sheamus’ head.
CHRISTIAN VS ALBERTO DEL RIO
Christian comes on strong and the match becomes a quick exchange of holds/escapes, and hard hits. Christian goes up top but the distraction from RR leaves him open to a shot to the head with a boot by Del Rio, who locks in the arm-breaker for the submission.
WINNER: ALBERTO DEL RIO
Up on the Titantron, Sheamus is with Del Rio’s super-expensive Ferrari. He says Alberto’s right about how Sheamus needs some class, so he’s going to class himself up, starting with his ride – actually Del Rio’s ride. It seems RR left the keys in the car after scrambling for Del Rio’s gear. Sheamus “borrows” the car and drives off while ADR loses his mind in the ring.
Big Show will face Randy Orton next.
BIG SHOW VS RANDY ORTON
The match falls into a simple pattern. Orton comes on strong but gets shut down by Show’s power. Show tries to ground Orton but Randy slips out. The match ends on the arena floor when Show spears Orton on the outside.
DOUBLE COUNT OUT: NO CONTEST
After the match, Orton sidesteps a WMD and scores an RKO on the Show.
COMMERCIAL
SUMMERSLAM PROMO
Tyler Recks and Curt Hawkins are in the ring. Ryback is introduced. As he comes to the ring, we get a picture-in-picture of Ryback referring to the WWE as his food supply.
TYLER RECKS/CURT HAWKINS VS RYBACK
Recks carries the match and actually has an impressive showing against Ryback, with Hawkins doing little more at first that providing distractions. Hawkins and Recks get in some nice looking double teaming, but the match ends with Ryback crushing Hawkins in the cradle-drop.
WINNER: RYBACK
COMMERCIAL
PRIME TIME PLAYERS VS PRIMO/EPICO
We come back w/both teams already in the ring. AW hypes up his team and they do the “millions of dollars” routine as the match starts. Epico drop-kicks Darien Young out of the ring, but Titus O’Neil takes over on Primo and the PTP double team him. Primo gets in some high-offense, but gets beat down some more. He finally tags in Epico, who comes in with high energy, and unloads on both PTP members. AW pulls his men out of this fight and tries to take a powder. Tag team champions R-Truth and Kofi Kingston cut them off. Mo/Co take the fight back in the ring and Primo hits the backstabber for the three count.
WINNERS: PRIMO/EPICO
We recap Damian Sandow getting martyred by DX and brutalizing Brodus Clay the following week.
Backstage: Josh Mathews interviews Sandow. Sandow is obligated to remove all foolishness from the WWE. He calls dancing wasteful and has chosen to take out Brodus Clay tonight.
We are welcome.
COMMERCIAL
Brodus comes out with the girls, but Sandow cuts the show short by clipping Clay’s leg from behind. The brawl spills to the floor, and Sandow continues to stomp the leg. Clay is hurt.
NO CONTEST
Backstage: AJ and Bryan are conversing. Bryan says when he beats Cena tonight AJ will have to make the main event at Summerslam a fatal-four way. AJ informs Bryan he’ll be facing Kane at Summerslam. This becomes a duel of chants. Brian says “NO!” AJ says “YES!” After a few fake outs, AJ wins and Brian storms off.
KELLY KELLY VS EVE
Apparently, this match is a penalty for Eve “touting” negatively about AJ. Eve tries to blow the match off, but KK goes right after her with an unusually vicious onslaught. KK unloads a flurry on Eve who bails outside for a breather, but KK goes right after her and pours it on. Eventually, Eve gets an opening by Pulling Kelly off the top rope and dropping her hard. Eve takes over with choking and chin locks, but Kelly rallies and gets the three count with a head scissors/roll up combo.
WINNER: KELLY KELLY
We recap Sheamus stealing Del Rio’s car before The Heartbreak Kid, Shawn Michaels makes his big guest spot. Shawn thanks the WWE universe for giving him a chance to be part of history with the 1000th show two weeks ago. Before Shawn can continue, Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman come out to interrupt. Heyman lectures on the differences between “entertaining” and “fighting.” Shawn tells Lesnar he made a mistake bringing Hunters’ family into it. Lesnar mentions how Shawn never fought him, and makes a move towards HBK. Triple H runs out and joins HBK in the ring. Lesnar backs off, promising to see Hunter at Summerslam, and HBK sooner than that.
We get ANOTHER recap of Sheamus swiping ADR’s car; followed by Sheamus sending a “Tout” from the car.
Chris Jericho is on commentary with the King and Cole. Vicki comes out to introduce Dolph Ziggler.
We get a recap of Ziggler and Jericho one upping each other over the past few weeks.
DOLPH ZIGGLER VS ALEX RILEY
Pretty basic match dominated by Ziggler. The story here is Ziggler is focusing more on Jericho than Riley. Jericho distracts Ziggler by getting up on the table and putting him on “Tout.” This gives Riley a chance to roll Ziggler up for three.
WINNER: ALEX RILEY
Sheamus gives us a “Tout” of him eating Mexican food in Del Rio’s car.
INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION THE MIZ VS KANE
Match falls into a pattern pretty quickly. Kane pummels Miz, and Miz kicks Kane’s legs out from under him. In the end, Kane is too much for Miz. Choke-slam = three count.
WINNER: KANE
Backstage: Sheamus brings back the car covered in garbage/filth, and asks a crew member to park it.
Daniel Bryan makes his way down, going ape in response to the “YES!” chant, demanding people stop.
Backstage: Del Rio makes RR clean up the car.
COMMERCIAL
MAIN EVENT: JOHN CENA VS DANIEL BRIAN
The crowd gets going with “let’s go Cena/C.M. Punk,” chant. Bryan insists this is about him. He stalls for time by going out and yelling at the fans.
Back in the ring, Cena takes control quickly, but Bryan counters out. Most of the match is Bryan working the arm and hitting high-impact kicks. Cena is down and Bryan is all up in a fan’s face at the break.
COMMERCIAL
Bryan is still in control when we come back. Cena makes the Superman comeback and hits the five knuckle shuffle. Cena tries for an STF but Bryan counters. Bryan gets the face-lock/body scissors combo on Cena, but Cena powers out. The match ends after an exchange of holds leads to Cena hoisting Bryan up in the AA, for three.
WINNER: JOHN CENA
After the match, C.M. Punk gets out in Cenas’ face. Cena shoves him away when he sees Big Show coming. Show and Cena go at it till Punk knocks them down from behind. Punk gets a head set on commentary and goes on a diatribe about not allowing people to disrespect him anymore. He gets back in the ring to Kick Show in the head, but Show catches the leg and clocks Punk w/the WMD, followed by one for Cena.
RAW ends with the Big Show hoisting the WWE title on his shoulder; and his Summerslam opponents down on the mat.
After Ace’s and 8’s dominated the show last week, this week will be the reckoning. Sting comes out and announces that he is the interim GM until Hogan gets out of his mesh, various metals and hip injury caused by Ace’s and 8’s and not a preconditioned wrestling lifestyle. Reality meets wrestling people. Sting calls out Aces and tells them that he’s alone, but then Austin Aries music hits and he comes out to back up the Icon. He has his own grieviousness with the group and whats a piece. But before that can happen Kurt Angle comes out and he recaps the recap explaining his reasons for wanting the Group got. This dovetails with Roode who comes and gives his conspiracy theory about James Storm being the Leader.
(more…)