This is going to be a quick post, since I haven’t actually seen most of the PPV. We’re looking for somebody to cover the WWE Pay-Per-View events starting with Survivor Series next month, so if you’re interested, let us know on Twitter or Facebook or Myspace or wherever.
Anyways…
The Miz def. John Morrison
RAW leads 1-0
Michelle McCool, Beth Phoenix, and Natalya def. Melina, Gail Kim, and Kelly Kelly
We’re now tied at 1
The Undertaker def. Batista, Rey Mysterio, & CM Punk to retain the World Heavyweight Championship
After the match, Batista destroyed Rey Mysterio
Team SmackDown def. Team RAW
The Big Show turned on RAW, chokeslamming Kofi Kingston and allowing Jericho to pick up the win.
John Cena def. Randy Orton 6 – 5
This match was far better than I’d expected – at least, what I saw of it. Orton tried everything to keep Cena down, including trying to blow him up in the pyro, but Cena wouldn’t stay down. At one point, the doctors superglued a cut on Cena’s forehead to close up the wound. Somewhere, Sabu is laughing his ass off. In any event, with the score tied at 5, Cena locked in the STF and got the tapout with just five seconds remaining. From what I understand, the clock kept running despite the fact that there should have been a 30 second rest period as there was through the duration of the rest of the match. Ah well. Guess I’ll be seeing Cena in Buffalo tomorrow night after all.
That’s it for tonight, folks. Join us tomorrow as our Empress of Impact, Drowgoddess, becomes our Reina of RAW! I’ll have photos and thoughts from the HSBC Arena sometime after the event, so stay tuned for that as well.
What’s up, my Peeps?! Hope all is well in your world. I’m back following an absence last week…sorry. While I may be a tad tardy to the party this week, this review is getting done. And here…we…go!
Match 1: Kelly Kelly vs Gail Kim
I think everybody knows how I feel about diva wrestling by now. Thus, you just get the results here. Kelly Kelly defeats Gail Kim. I think Gail turns on Sunday. Raw needs another heel diva.
Match 2: Ezekiel Jackson and Vladimir Kozlov vs Tommy Dreamer and Golddust
I like Big Zeke and Golddust, but could care less about the other two. The finish sees Dreamer hit Kozlov from behind and Golddust hits the Flatline for the win. After the match, Jackson and Kozlov attack Tommy and the Bizzarre One. Zeke is a future World Champ IMO!
Main Event: Matt Hardy and R-Truth vs Drew McIntyre and Eric Escobar
Matt looks really fat in those tights that he insists on wearing to the ring every week. R-Truth should be an IC title contender. Drew McIntyre is pure gold. Eric Escobar IS fat. McIntyre hits Hardy with his DDT for the win. They are intent on pushing their young talent on Smackdown…catch a hint RAW!
RAW kicks off, and it’s host is a World Champion from Pittsburgh – but it’s not Kurt Angle. Ben Roelithsberger comes out to some boos, saying he knows they’ve got Eagles fans in the house, but that they’ve also got Steelers fans, but tonight we’re all WWE fans. He says he’s got a surprise. It’s the Diva Bowl. A team of face Divas show up in Steelers jerseys, followed by a team of heel divas in white shirts, followed by Gail Kim in a referee outfit. Great. The one who can actually wrestle is the referee.
Diva Bowl
What the hell is this crap? At least we’re getting it out of the way early. The faces won when Mickie James pinned Alicia Fox.
The face Divas are still standing in the ring when the NEW WWE Champion, Randy Orton makes his way to the ring.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Orton says that last night he defeated John Cena and became a 6 time WWE Champion. The people say he uses shortcuts, needs backup, and flat out cheats. When last night did any of that happen? He and John Cena walked in to Hell in a Cell, and Orton beat him. End of story. He’s willing to bet that Cena will interrupt him and ask for a rematch. Orton tells Cena to do what he thinks he needs to do. Orton says he knows exactly what he’ll say to Cena. The fans chant Cena’s name and…
SHABADOO! Your time is up my time is now…
The former champ is here, and he runs down to the ring. Orton says that Cena looks awful excited, and he thinks he knows why. Orton says he won’t get a rematch tonight. Cena’s look turns to that of disappointment. Cena says Orton just told the WWE Universe that he doesn’t give a damn about them. He’s a WWE Superstar who strives to be the best, so what Cena’s here to do is congratulate Orton on his win last night. Cena says he can tell us how brutal Hell In A Cell was, but the interesting thing is that there was something special. Something Cena noticed before, during, and after the match. He noticed over 16,000 members of the WWE Universe standing the whole time. There were people cheering for Cena. There were people cheering for Orton. John Cena and Randy Orton has become the rivalry. Whether a singles match, triple threat, I quit, or Hell In A Cell, it’s simply amazing. Cena would like to do it one more time, and the people seem to agree. He cares about the WWE Universe and wants to give them a match. Not just any match, the match. The match of matches – an Iron Man match. Right, like Cena can go for 60 minutes and keep a crowd into it. Anyways, Cena says that after the iron man match, there will be no more rematches. Orton says he sees what Cena’s doing. If Cena wins, he don’t get a rematch. He says he agrees that we need to end this, but we’ll do it Orton’s way. If Cena wins he gets the title, if Orton wins, Cena is gone from RAW. He can go to SmackDown, he can go to ECW, Orton doesn’t care. He just wants him off of RAW. Cena confirms that’s what Orton wants and says he’ll do it. Orton says that’s not all he wants. No DQ, no count out, and on his terms. Cena asks that if that means they can use whatever they want and turn this into the biggest brawl of all time. Orton says that’s exactly what he’s saying. Take it or leave it. Cena says 60 minutes, anything goes, and if he loses he leaves RAW. Cena says he’s on. The two shake hands, and we’re set to finally end this rivalry.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Somebody has a sign in the crowd with a picture of a slobbering Daffy Duck that says “JACK THWAGGER” on it. Somebody’s been reading Bored Wrestling Fan. Anyways, Swagger’s here. He says he looks and smells like a winner, because he is a winner. FYI, he didn’t get pinned last night, and going forth, he will not lose. For the rest of the year, he promises that he will go undefeated. He’s the All American American, Jack Swagger, and he approves this message. Primo’s shitty music starts, and so does the Aldo Montoya pyro, and we confirm that the Cena/Orton match won’t be tonight, it will be at the Bragging Rights PPV. Please, for the love of insert supreme being here, let Cena lose so I don’t have to see him the next night in Buffalo.
Jack Swagger vs. Primo
Swagger’s prophecy starts off on the right foot as he easily defeats Primo following a gutwrench powerbomb.
Chris Jericho and The Big Show are here. We’ll hear from the Tag Team Champions later on tonight.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Backstage, the Divas are arguing when referee Santino blows the whistle. He calls encroachment on #23 on the defense. Mickie asks what the hell he’s talking about. He says he’s trying to get into the football spirit, and asks Mickie and Alicia to kiss and make up. Alicia slaps Santino and the Divas start brawling again.
The Miz interrupts Ben Roethlisberger and complains about Swagger insinuating that The Miz lost last night. Big Ben asks what happened. Miz admits to getting pin. The Miz says that being awesome isn’t a catch phrase. He asks for a shot at Kofi Kingston tonight. After all, it’s his birthday week. Ben says he can do this. He makes the match, but says there’s a stipulation. If Miz loses, he gets in the middle of the ring, takes the microphone, and tells everybody that “I’m The Miz, and I’m Awful.”
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Last week, Chavo punched Chris Masters in the face for hurting Hornswoggle for some reason. Chavito is here, teaming with The Masterpiece again. Their opponents are the team of MVP and Mark Henry. Shouldn’t MVP be WWE Champion by now?
MVP & Mark Henry vs. Chavo Guerrero & Chris Masters
Henry and MVP pick up the win, but Henry appears to have injured his leg.
After the match, Masters asks Chavo what happened. He gets in Guerrero’s face, and Guerrero shoves him. Masters gets Guerrero in the Master Lock, but Hornswoggle comes to Chavo’s rescue. Chavo drops Masters with a DDT, and then Hornswoggle gives Chavo a DX style crotch chop.
Ben Roethlisberger is on his way to the ring.
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Roethlisberger makes his way out to the ring – and he barely gets a sentence out when…
WELL… WELL IT’S THE BIG SHOW – BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!
Show wants to know whey they call him Big Ben. How big can his big offensive line be compared to The Big Show. Jericho says they’re probably not as big as he is. Roethlisberger invites them out. The Steelers O-line make their way to the ring. Jericho asks if they’re supposed to be intimidated. He says this isn’t a football field, it’s the WWE ring. JeriShow don’t wear helmets or pads, or take time off for turf toe. He suggests the Steelers get a huddle going and figure out a strategy, because Jericho and The Big Show are the best team in sports. The Steelers huddle and line up at the line of scrimmage. The Big Show prepares to go at them, but thinks better of it…
BREAK IT DOWN!
DX are here for some reason. Jericho says he should’ve expected a potential Sportscenter moment ruined by two miscreants who hare just here to shill their merchandise (which Jericho shills in the meantime). Triple H says he just wanted to tell Jericho how nice his hair looks. Jericho says “really?” Triple H says hell no, his hair looks ridiculous. HBK says he’s tired of Jericho running his mouth about how many great tag teams they’ve faced. There’s one they haven’t faced. Show asks if that’s some kind of challenge. HBK says he’s in pain, but yeah, it’s a challenge. Show suggests he goes home and nurses his wounds, because DX doesn’t want a part of JeriShow. Jericho says HBK isn’t worthy. DX don’t deserve to face The Big Show and Chris Jericho. Roethlisberger says that tonight, JeriShow will face DX. He says if they’re not down with that, we’ve got two words for you… The Steelers and DX do the crotch chops and set off the pyro.
Up next, it’s The Miz vs. Kofi Kingston for the WWE United States Championship
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Kofi Kingston is here, and he’s got his United States Championship with him. His opponent is from Cleveland Ohio, and if he loses, he has to announce that he’s The Miz, and He’s Awful.
The Miz def. Kofi Kingston to become the new United States Champion
After a hell of a match, The Miz finally hits the Skull Crushing Finale and becomes the NEW United States Heavyweight Champion!
After the match, he takes the microphone and he says that we’re looking at the NEW United States Champion, because he’s The Miz, and he’s AWESOME!
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Earlier Tonight: John Cena and Randy Orton set the stipulations for their No Disqualification Iron Man Match at Bragging Rights.
Backstage, Hornswoggle is talking to Ben Roethlisberger when Santino comes in and complains about being slapped and mauled by the Divas. He calls him Ben Surfandturfer. Santino tries to pronounce Roethlisberger’s name, even calling him “Ben Bralesswonder.” Hornswoggle slaps Santino, who then manages to say Roethlisberger.
The Big Show and Chris Jericho are walking backstage. That means, they’re next!
You can help out the Ben Roethlisberger Foundation by going to bigben7.com/foundation.aspx
<COMMERCIAL BREAK>
Nancy O’Dell and Maria Menounos from Access Hollywood are the guest hostesses next week. One of them is featured in WWE Magazine this month (the one with DX on the cover) as the Sexy Celebrity Super Fan of the month, and the article asks her about her experience guest hosting RAW.
The Unified Tag Team Champions make their way out, and then…
Are You Ready?
DX head to the ring. They don’t bother to do their little spiel, it’s all business for the HeartBreak Kid and The Game tonight.
DX def. JeriShow
NOTE:As you guys know by now, I leave for work before the end of RAW. This week we had some technical difficulties with the site, so I didn’t bother to get somebody to finish the review for me. I have not seen this match, so the following is my knowledge of the main event based on other reviews I’ve read. This won’t be a weekly thing, just this week due to the technical problems.
JeriShow focused on DX’s injuries from last night’s Hell In A Cell match, but DX held their own. Jericho attempted to leave, but was stopped at the top of the ramp by the Pittsburgh Steelers offensive line. Jericho was forced back into the ring and ate Sweet Chin Music, leading to the DX victory.
My Thoughts: “Please let Orton win, please let Orton win, please let Orton win.” Those are my thoughts. Bragging Rights is Sunday, October 25th. On October 26th, I’ll be in attendance at RAW. If Orton wins, Cena’s gone from RAW. I don’t know why I’m so hell bent on not seeing John Cena at RAW. I think I’m just frustrated with the direction of his character from the time he won the WWE Championship at WrestleMania 21. I was a huge Cena mark when I saw him at WrestleMania XIX in Seattle and the night he turned face on SmackDown in Buffalo. I’m just bored with him now. WWE pushes him like crazy despite the fact that it’s obvious a lot of fans hate him. I understand why though – he sells a lot of merchandise and is probably the closest thing they have to a mainstream star right now, the Hulk Hogan of this generation. For what it’s worth, the dark main event that has been advertised for RAW the day after Bragging Rights is DX and Cena against Orton and Legacy.
Now, the future. The Miz and John Morrison called themselves the greatest tag team of the 21st Century (that’s a hint for those of you doing the “guess the match” thing in the back of this month’s WWE Magazine, BTW), and both hold the secondary titles on their respective brands now, with JoMo the Intercontinental Champion and The Miz as the United States Champion. These two guys are going to be HUGE in the future. Of course, I probably would’ve said that two years ago about MVP, but we see where he is. Teaming with Mark Henry to face Chavo Guerrero and Chris Masters.
DX has been the focal point of RAW and the last three PPVs. Nevermind that Randy Orton and John Cena have traded the WWE Championship back and forth in what could be considered epic battles through those last three events. For these guys to get top billing over the guys wrestling for the championship leads me to believe that one of them maybe knows somebody in power in the WWE. Oh look, I can make subtle jokes about who Triple H is married to too!
That’s it for RAW this week, folks. I just want to let you guys know of a couple of things we’ve got going on around here in the near future. First, I’m working on a new BWF Skin that should be available sometime in the next couple of days. I’m also planning on dropping the “Grungy” and “BlueMania 25” themes. I’m not happy with them, and in the case of “Grungy,” it’s hard to expand upon when we add new things. I’m also planning on doing an Eddie Guerrero tribute column next month on the four year anniversary of his death. I’d like to include the thoughts of our readers, so get those to us in one of three ways – send them in a PM to ThinkSoJoE on the BWF Network Forums, tweet them to @BrdWrstlngFn, or e-mail them to GuerreroTribute@boredwrestlingfan.com.
Ok… Raw sucked (read the results, didn’t watch) and ECW was very mediocre this week, so let’s see what Superstars has in store for us.
Match 1: John Morrison vs David Hart Smith
WWE is Canada is always ass backwards. David Hart Smith and Natalya get the huge pops in their home country. John Morrison is one of the few bright spots in WWE right now. Hell of a main event for Smackdown as Morrison takes on CM Punk. Little Bulldog is massive! He pounds on the Shaman of Sexy for a lot of the match. He hit a terrific suplex off the top rope. Morrison eventually hit all of his spots (Pele kick, standing moonsault, spinning kick, etc.) The Guru of Greatness gets the win with Starship Pain.
Match 2: Goldust vs Sheamus
The Celtic Warrior is huge, but looks smaller than he is because of his almost transparent skin. Dude is ghostly. How many times in a row are they going to do this match? Shouldn’t Sheamus be taking on other people to gain experience? This is just another example of WWE’s lazy booking. Anyway, Goldust wins with a rollup for some reason. Sheamus didn’t look weak, but shouldn’t they be booking him better than to lose to Goldust?
Random main event time: Mickie James and Kofi Kingston vs Rosa Mendez and Carlito in a Mixed Tag match
Alrighty then. This does nothing to enhance any feud. What’s up with Carlito’s hair? He look’s like a shi tzu who hasn’t been groomed in a while. I guess its part of his new dark and gloomy persona. This match was dominated in time by Kofi and Carlito. I think Mickie and Rosa were in the ring for about 15 seconds. Carlito gets the win after a backstabber off the top rope.
Random Random Random. I get that Carlito should be in the mix for the US title, but shouldn’t he also be dealing with his brother? Isn’t Gail Kim the number one contender for the Diva title? Why wasn’t she in that match? Sheamus should be booked to be taking people out…not losing to Goldust. John Morrison is great…nuf said.
Remember to check out Smackdown, which is obviously the best show WWE has to offer right now. See you next week.
It seems that Joe wants the week off, and with my power due to go off at any minute. I’m doing Real-Time this week, for the second week in three.
Stay tuned to BWF, as I watch NCIS.
The search for HBK is on! My guess is, he’s in a bar having a few brewskis. I know it’s never going to happen, but come on WWE, swerve us will you?
This RAW is from Calgary, Alberta, Canada. Where a certain someone was born to wrestle, and bred to win. All rise for the playing of the Canadian National Anthem.
Randy Orton starts us off. He’s been hearing rumours, apparently. Were they rumours, or the Voices in your head Randy? My namesake goes on about how it’s no rumour that he’s gonna beat John Cena at Summerslam, and that seemed to be the lightbulb in the head of the challenger, as Cena comes out. Cena wants Orton to bully him, that right there proves that John Cena is not a ladies man. Johnny boy gets up close and personal with the son of Cowboy Bob, and this brings out JeriShow, with the single worst entrance music in the history of entrance music.
Show finds it amusing that Cena and Orton are up close and personal with each other. Show speaks, but there’s a Canadian in the ring, so the crowd chant for Jericho. Cena makes a Shaq joke, then asks why have the Tag Team champions made their presence. Jericho plugs Canada, then tells Cena he’s got a one-on-one match against him. Randy gets his two bobs in, but Big Show cuts him off, telling RKO that its gonna be Show and Orton one-on-one.
The Sarge sounds like he needs a cough drop to soothe that throat. This brings us to commercial.
Ooh look, there’s a vote. Who did the Sarge beat for the WWE Championship? Savage, Hogan or Warrior. Shouldn’t the question be, which one will be the first to appear on WWE RAW?
MATCH#1: Four-Way Divas – Winner gets a Divas Title shot
Kelly Kelly vs Alicia Fox vs Gail Kim vs Beth Phoenix
If you want to find out what actually happens, in this match, find someone who cares about the WWE Women’s division, I’m off to get food.
As I return from not paying attention to the match. I hear Cole describe Kim as ‘elastic-like’, and I hear more grunting than Maria Sharapova at Wimbledon. You’ve gotta love it don’t you? It has appeared for weeks that Beth Phoenix will face Mickie James for the belt, and yet …
YOUR WINNER: Gail Kim
It’s the first ever TNA KnockOuts champion who gets the victory.
Out comes Slaughter to pretty much zero reaction from the crowd. He starts off by sucking up to Canada, and saluting the C anadian flag? Has the Sarge turned on the U.S. for the second time in his career? Of course not. Sarge turns on his newly made friends, by saying if it wasn’t for the U.S., they would be speaking Russian and French now. Infact, most of them speak French. Now Sarge wants Canadians to pay respect to the United States. Looks like Slaughter’s playing bad guy tonight.
COMMERCIAL
We’re back, and a recap of Triple H announcing he’s reforming DX for SummerSlam, and how trips travelled to Texas to find him. Yip.
MATCH#2: Jack Swagger vs Evan Bourne
The rubber match between the two. This match will go no longer than five minutes. I guarantee it.
Swagger uses his power advantage early on, until Bourne uses his speed advantage to control the match. Swagger with a submission hold, but Bourne escapes and attack with some kicks, ending with a near fall. Swagger looks for the powerbomb, but Evan counters into a roll-up for a near fall. Swagger introduces his opponent to the turnbuckle as hard as he possibly can, and one Gutwrench Powerbomb later, and Dusty Rhodes gets the pin.
YOUR WINNER: Jack Swagger.
Told you the match would be quick. Swagger on the mic, and after he talks. Here comes MVP. He doesn’t care that Dusty is a 2-time All-American, the Canadians don’t care. Nobody cares. MVP challenges Swagger to a match tonight. Swagger wants it next week, but MVP isnt happy and pushes Swagger out of the ring.
Don’t forget. Orton vs Show, Jericho vs Cena and the hunt for the Christian. Still to come.
COMMERCIAL
Back, and we’re hunting Christians. H hits on a guy, and scores. A little girl wants a hamburger, and it’s Texas Chef HBK. H is shocked. I think it’s lame-i-fied.
Here comes the Sarge again. He has bought us Celine Dion to sing the Canadian National Anthem. That’s a lie, as it’s really Jillian. I’d prefer Jillian to Celine Dion.
COMMERCIAL
Why is Vince plugging Monk?
Back from commercial, and it’s a contract on a pole match? Vince Russo IS writing for the WWE.
MATCH#3: Contract on a Pole
Eugene vs Calgary Kid
Eugene channels his inner Rock, and hits the Rock Bottom and the People’s Elbow, but that doesnt affect the Calgary Kid. Calgary Kid knocks Eugene off the ropes and grabs the contract.
YOUR WINNER: Calg…
Wait a minute, that isn’t the Calgary Kid. He just hit the Stroke!
YOUR WINNER: Jeff Jarr..
Wait a minute, that’s not the Chosen One, it’s …
YOUR WINNER: The Miz
The Miz is back on RAW, so what was the point of last week?
COMMERCIAL
We’re back with the Rewind, Show beating the hell out of Kofi last week.
MATCH#4: Randy Orton vs the Big Show
Big Show has been borrowing John Tenta’s ring attire.
Show gets up close and personal to Orton, but Randy backs away. Maybe Orton only likes it when it’s Cena close to him. Randy Orton has had a grand total of zero offence so far in this match. I’ve been in and out during this match, so I have missed sections. I get back to see RKO looking for just that, the RKO, but Show blocks it. Show connects with the Chokeslam, but Orton is too close to the ropes, and gets his foot on the rope, when Show goes for the fall. Big Show goes for the fist, but Orton ducks under and heads out of the ring, and deliberately gets counted out.
YOUR WINNER VIA COUNTOUT: Big Show
Hunting for Christians Part Two
Shawn gets tater tots thrown in his face. Also, he can’t cook. When I worked in the food industry, I never burned the grill like that. I only saw someone smash a light globe into the fry vats.
COMMERCIAL
Another pointless Did You Know? from the folks at WWE.
MATCH#5: MVP vs Chris Masters
MVP doesn’t get to fight Swagger, instead he gets the Masterpiece.
Masters with the assualt on MVP in the early going. He continues the advantage until he applies a chinlock-type hold, then MVP gets the momentum. MVP’s jumpsuit is as bright as Mark Henry’s costume last week. Masters goes for the Masterlock, but MVP counters into the Playmaker!!
YOUR WINNER: MVP
Enter the Swagger. The All-American American causes a long enough distraction for the Masterlock to be applied. Once that’s done, Swagger hits his Powerbomb.
A pop for Piven and Dr. Ken and their publicity run last week.
COMMERCIAL: They love these during a broadcast, don’t they?
Back again, and it’s time for …
Hunting for Christians, Part Three
Shawn’s hired Hunter to help him flip burgers. Shawn Sweet Chins his boss. An old lady tells me to suck it, and Shawn Sweet Chin’s a little girl.
Enter the Sarge yet again, and he cues the music of the Hitman. But no, it’s not Bret Hart, it’s Jim Duggan, complete with American flag.
COMMERCIAL
We’re back, with the Slam of the Week. Mark Henry vs Chavo Guerrero from last week.
MATCH#6: Hornswoggle and Mark Henry vs ??
Chavo was meant to be competing, but he is ‘injured’, so he calls on Legacy to take his place.
Henry gets the upper hand, before Legacy start the dissecting. However, that is short lives, as Henry regains control. World’s Strongest Slam on DiBiase, the tag to Hornswoggle for the Splash, but DiBiase gets out of the way and Cody takes out Henry. One Dream Street later, and it’s bye bye to the Woggle.
YOUR WINNERS: Ted DiBiase and Cody Rhodes.
After the match, Legacy grab mics and book themselves to do the J.O.B to DX at SummerSlam.
We’re back with a rundowm of the SummerSlam card, then Josh Matthews interviews Chris Jericho. Jericho says he’s winning for Calgary, then Show arrives. BIg Show bitches about how Orton ran off on him, Jericho bags out Calgary. Matthews tells Jericho the cameras are still rolling. Jericho feels like a tool.
COMMERCIAL
Next week’s RAW Guest Host. Former WWE writer, Freddie Prinze Jr.
MAIN EVENT: Chris Jericho vs John Cena
Cena gains the early momentum, until Jericho takes over. Cena ends up outside the ring, where Y2J introduces him to the ring steps. Jericho then applies a Camel Clutch, just because Sarge is guest host. Back in the ring, and Cena somehow gains control. He looks for the shuffle, but Jericho rolls him up for the two. Jericho misses with the Lionsault, but doesn’t with the Walls attempt. Cena counters into the STF, but Orton comes and breaks it up before the Ayatollah of Rock ‘n Rollah can tap, causing the DQ.
YOUR WINNER BY DQ: John Cena
Cena gets in Orton’s face, but eats a CodeBreaker from Jericho. Jericho shoves Orton, so Jericho gets knocked down. Enter Show. Chokeslam to Orton. Sarge comes out and announces JeriShow vs Cena and Orton for next week, as we end.
There, even though the servers for BWF crashed during this broadcast, I did my best to bring you the action.
Wow what a week. Happy whatever you are celebrating in your part of the world and welcome to the best couple of minutes you never get back. Well lets hope this will be the last week in a while that I have to start of with this: (more…)
So on RAW earlier tonight we found out that Evan Bourne, Jack Swagger, and Mark Henry have all joined RAW as part of a 15 Superstar trade. Here’s the complete list:
Coming to Monday Night RAW:
Jack Swagger (from ECW)
Evan Bourne (from ECW)
Mark Henry (from ECW)
Alicia Fox (from SmackDown)
Gail Kim (from SmackDown)
Coming to Friday Night SmackDown:
Matt Hardy (from RAW)
Finlay (from ECW)
The Hart Dynasty – Tyson Kidd, DH Smith, and Natalya (from ECW)
Coming to ECW:
Shelton Benjamin (from SmackDown)
Goldust (from RAW)
William Regal (from RAW)
Nicki & Brie Bella (from RAW)
Somebody please tell me – what the hell was the point of the draft? The Bellas went to RAW from SmackDown with the Draft, as did Matt Hardy. Alicia Fox just got over to SmackDown from ECW and now she’s on RAW. It’s ridiculous. Ah well, whatever. Be interesting to see if ECW is as good minus Swagger, Bourne, Henry, and the Hart Dynasty. Shelton Benjamin is the only major SmackDown loss – and I say this because they pretty much treat Gail Kim like she’s a jobber anyway. In fact, SmackDown will be even better with David Hart Smith, Tyson Kidd, and Natalya (who was drafted to ECW from SmackDown earlier this year in the supplemental draft, incidentally).
I just don’t see the point of this – the draft was just two months ago!
Hey people! Let’s get this review of WWE Superstars going.
First Match is a Diva’s Tag Match pairing Gail Kim and the very delicious Maria against Alicia Fox and Michelle McCool
The match starts off with Gail Kim against Alicia Fox. Kim starts on the offense then tags Maria in, who continues the attack. Alicia Fox throws Maria into the ropes and McCool kicks her in the back o’ the head. A couple of quick tags in the Fox/McCool corner take place and Michelle McCool starts to wear Maria down. Gail Kim distracts McCool and Maria kicks her in the head and makes her way over to Kim for the tag. Kim hits a neckbreaker off the top rope. Kim goes up for another top rope manuever, but McCool executes a kick to Kim and makes the cover for the 3-count. Winner : Michelle McCool and Alicia Fox. I give this match a 4 out of 10. I’m not the biggest fan of Diva wrestling, and this was a very average match.
Next up is Pirate Paul….oh wait its just Paul Burchill w/ Katie Lea now against Evan Bourne
Paul Burchill starts off with the offense, but Bourne turns the tables with his quickness. Burchill’s strength puts him back in control for a bit. The quickness of Air Bourne gives him some offense, but he seemingly hurts his knee. Burchill focuses in on that knee with the help of his sister Katie Lea at ringside. Bourne battles back and takes Burchill down with a series of kicks. Bourne goes for the Shooting Star Press, but Burchill climbs the ropes to prevent it. Bourne then punches him of the ropes and Burchill lands on his back, and Shooting Star Press for Bourne for the win. I love that move. It is the prettiest move I have ever seen. I give this match a 7.5 out of 10. I wish Bourne had gotten more high flying spots, but both men worked well.
Backstage interview with Cody Whodth and Ted DiBiase. Does anybody else like Legacy as much as me?
Oh yeah…Christian is the new ECW champion! There it is….my Cheap Christian plug of the week. I hope the PEEPulation is growing!
Anywho…the main event of the evening is Ted Dibiase 2.0 against one half of the Unified Tag Team Champions, Carlito
The lock up has TD2 sending Carlito into the corner and beating him down. Carlito then switches it and beats on Dibiase. Good back and forth matchup to start the match. Pretty cool spot with both men going over the top to the outside happens, as Superstars goes to break. Back from break, DiBiase is on the attack and stomps Carlito into the mat. TD2 is very Randy Ortonesque in the ring. Dibiase hits his Million Dollar Dream Slam when Carlito tries a springboard elbow. Winner of the match is Ted Dibiase. I give this match a 8.5 out of 10. Both men are legit in the ring, and it blows my mind how Carlito has never gotten a main event shot.
The show was pretty good, with the exception of the Diva Tag match. I like them giving airtime to Ted Dibiase on here. He is definitely a future main eventer and needs the exposure. I guess its time to leave you with a fact of life as I know it. Most Diva wrestling sucks!!! Peace out peoples.
I wasn’t home and missed the first half of SmackDown, so here are the results courtesy of tvfanatic.com:
WWE SmackDown was taped this week from London. In the main event, Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase took on Shane McMahon and Batista. Here’s a rundown of events and matches from the event…
– Edge comes (to the) ring and cuts promo on Sunday’s Backlash. Lots of heat when he mentions Vickie Guerrero. She sucks.
– Matt Hardy and Kane defeat Jeff Hardy and CM Punk; Solid match. Matt gets the rollup on Jeff for the victory.
– The Big Show defeats The Undertaker; The Big Show delivers a knockout blow to the back of Undertaker’s head. The referee stops the match because Undertaker can’t continue. But The Undertaker gets up and punches Big Show out of the ring.
– Maryse defeats Gail Kim, retains the WWE Divas Championship; very boring match.
– MVP defeats Chavo Guerrero; quick match that was followed by a challenge to MVP by Dolph Ziggler for a match next week.
– Shane McMahon and Batista defeat Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase; Shane gets the pin but also accidentally knocks Batista off the ropes during the match. Uh-oh.
Wait, this isnt Wednesday. What am I doing here? I’ve already posted for the week. Well, it seems that Joe didnt like my (No Wrestlemania column during WrestleMania week column), so I am here to tell you who is winning at Wrestlemania. That’s right, no predictions. I’m telling you, who will win. Let’s begin.
Intercontinental Championship
John Bradshaw Layfield (c) vs Rey Mysterio
The head says JBL wins, and with Tazz not renewing his contract, he retires again and joins JR on commentary.
The heart agrees.
the Annual Money In The Bank Ladder Match
CM Punk vs Kane vs Mark Henry vs Finlay vs MVP vs Shelton Benjamin vs Kofi Kingston vs Christian
Everyone seems to think, that this will be the first year that the winner of the MITB, will not win the title, when they do cash in the case. However, i’m going to use some logistics. Edge won the first MITB, was a heel, and won sneakily. RVD was next, was a facee, and he won at ECW One Night Stand, after challenging John Cena. CM Punk was last year’s winner, was also face, and beat Edge, sneakily.
According to the past, two faces and one heel have won. According to the current champions, two heels and one face are champions. The Champions might change, but the MITB winner is the biggest tweener in the history. The head says Kane, the heart says Kane. Kane challenges for the World Heavyweight Championship, and loses.
A 25 woman’s Diva Battle Royal including Melina, Maryse, Mickie James, Gail Kim, Michelle McCool, Nikki Bella, Brie Bella, Alicia Fox, Kelly Kelly, Maria, Eve Torres, Katie Lea Burchill, Beth Phoenix, Layla El, Rosa Mendes, Candice Michelle, Natalya, Jillian Hall, Tiffany, Tammy “Sunny” Sytch, Victoria, Molly Holly, Jackie Gayda-Hass, Mae Young and one more unannounced to crown Miss Wrestlemania.
The head and heart agree again. Whomever the unannounced Diva is.
Extreme Rules match
Jeff Hardy vs Matt Hardy
The head says Jeff. The heart doesnt care, but reluctantly says Matt.
WWE Tag Team Championship and World Tag Team Championship
Carlito and Primo (c) vs John Morrison and the Miz (c)
Again, it looks straight-forward. The head and the heart say with the second best Tag Team in wrestling today. John Morrison and the Miz.
3-on-1 Handicap Match
Chris Jericho vs Jimmy ‘Superfly’ Snuka, Ricky ‘The Dragon’ Steamboat and ‘Rowdy’ Roddy Piper w/ ‘Nature Boy’ Ric Flair
The heart says Jericho.It does. However, the head says the Legends.
World Heavyweight Championship
for the love of Vickie Guerrero
Edge (c) vs John Cena vs Big Show
The stipulation of the love of Vickie Guerrero, makes the head choose Edge. However, the heart wants a new champion, theBig Show.
WWE Championship
Triple H (c) vs Randy Orton
The heart has three certain choices every year. Triple H is one of them, so the heart says Triple H. However, the head thinks this way. Why push Randy Orton up to be the big heel on campus, and not have him win the title? The head says Randy Orton.
Which leaves us just one match ….
Shawn Michaels vs the Undertaker
Mr. Wrestlemania versus the Streak. Undertaker is 16-0 at Wrestlemania, but never before, has he faced the man, whom always seems to steal the show, when it comes to Wrestlemania. How I said earlier, that the heart has three choices, and that Triple H was one? HBK and the Undertaker, are the other two, so the heart is undecided. The head however, doesn’t see the streak breaking, so the head chooses the Undertaker. The heart is torn between two, but thinks the streak could be broken. The heart chooses Shawn Michaels.
Let’s recap just what the heart and the head have chosen.
