Tag Archive: John Cena

  1. WWE Makes an “Awesome” Signing

    7 Comments

    WWE has reportedly signed former TNA Knockouts champion Awesome Kong to a contract.

    Kong tweeted that she had finally scored her “dream job,” but made no mention of WWE by name. (more…)

  2. John Cena reportedly injured

    4 Comments

    One night removed from co-starring in one of the best opening promos in recent RAW memory, John Cena has apparently been injured during a cage match against former Nexus leader Wade Barrett at a house show in Wilkes-Barre, PA.  We don’t have all the details at this time, but hopefully Cena won’t have to miss an extended amount of time away from the ring.

  3. RAW: 12/27/10

    8 Comments

    Ok, I know what you’re thinking. Who is this jerk usurping AlyKat’s spot?

    The answer is G, I’ve been doing the iMPACT reviews as of late and she’s unable to make it this week.*

    And I know you’re asking yourself, “Well then Mr. G, will there be the twittering like she does?”

    No. Maybe some fake ones, but no. I will be doing this in my usual suffer-through-it-as-I-write style.

    * Card subject to change.

    Well then, let’s get down to business and see what the WWE served up for the last RAW of 2010, shall we? I haven’t done a RAW review in a long, long time.

    (more…)

  4. Live “Smackdown” Report 12/21/10

    4 Comments

    Hey, BoredWrestlingFans! Last week I said I’d next see you all on Christmas (or thereabouts), but that was before ‘WWE Week on USA’ was announced, including a live SmackDown! being broadcast on Tuesday night. The greatest thing about this live SmackDown! will be the lack of that canned cheering sound which the guys in the production truck love piping in to the taped shows to try and enhance crowd reactions. D’you know the sound I mean? It’s hard to describe… Anyway, I’m babbling.

    So, without further ado, let’s get down to business! (more…)

  5. RAW 12.20.10

    5 Comments

    Hello everyone! Sorry this is up late, but I had a headache last night, and my throat hurt… Not that I need to tell you wall that.  Anyway!  Make sure to check out this link: http://boredwrestlingfan.com/2010/12/14/raw-tweeter-year-contest/ and vote for who you think deserves to be RAW Tweeter of the Year!! You have until December 31st to cast your votes.  Now, if your name isn’t there, don’t be upset.  These are just the people who I mentioned repeatedly in the review because of their tweets.  Use the #BWF hash tag (just like that) on Twitter and maybe you can get mentioned!  We’ll see what happens for next year, but let’s finish up this year first.

    Anyway, last night was Tables, Ladders, and Chairs!  Who walked out victorious with the WWE Championship?  Did John Cena defeat Nexus leader Wade Barrett?  Did I eat those cookies…?  I didn’t eat the cookies.  I remember now.

    AWESOME!

    We start out with WWE Champion The Miz coming out all by his lonesome!  Where’s Alex Riley?!  And no Michael Cole?! Thank God!! RAW’s starting out amazing!!

    Miz says that he is STILL the WWE Champion.  We better get used to hearing ‘and still WWE Champion, The Miz’.  Doesn’t it have a nice ring to it?  He knows it’s tough for everyone to digest.  They were all expecting an announcement of “the NEW WWE Champion, Randy Orton”, but that didn’t happen, now did it?  The Miz beat Randy Orton, put him through a table and now…  Miz is interrupted by some ghostly music and Alex Riley comes out.

    Riley says that he is the Ghost of Christmas Past.  He’s here to show Miz the error of his ways before it is too late.  Behold, his first ever WWE Title Defense, which was, of course, against Jerry “The King” Lawler, three weeks ago.  Miz says the error of his ways?  He’s actually proud of what he did.  He beat a WWE Hall of Famer and made sure that he will never be WWE Champion.  He doesn’t regret that moment, and he doesn’t regret any actions he’s ever done in the past.  He starts to go on, but is interrupted again by Cole, dressed up as the Ghost of Christmas Present.

    Cole says “And I Quote…” Miz needs to change.  His actions from last night, in the tables match vs. Randy Orton were, although vintage, unacceptable.  He retained his championship through nefarious means, and he should be ashamed.  Miz says no, that’s where Cole’s wrong.  The actions of a true champion are defined by one sentence and one sentence only: Are they still WWE Champion after the match?  And yes, he was.  That is all that matters.  Randy Orton underestimated Miz, and Miz beat him.  So, here’s an image to put on your Christmas cards: Happy Holidays from The Miz!

    Miz is interrupted again, but this time by a still image of Angry Miz girl, who tells Miz that she is the Ghost of Christmas Future, and she is very angry.

    Miz needs to see the light and change his ways, or the new Number One Contender, John Morrison, will beat him.  Miz says that he is the future.  He is the face of this company, the most must-see champion in WWE history.  Charles Dickens himself couldn’t write a better story, because he’s The Miz, and he’s AWESOME!

    Now listen, this ain’t no make believe…

    John Morrison makes his way out, and ruins CM Punk’s night.   He says he’s surprised.  That was really stupid, even for Miz.  But, Morrison’s actually happy for his success, because last night, he beat Sheamus.  He climbed a ladder, grabbed a contract, and he’s the new Number One Contender.  That means that sometime soon, they will fight for that title.  And Morrison has news for Miz: He’s beat him in the past, in the present, and he knows he can beat him in the future.  And when he does, he will become the new WWE Champion.  Miz asks really?  And has kind of a really-off with the audience.  Miz says he’s always been better than Morrison, and Morrison couldn’t…  Before Miz can continue, Riley jumps in front of him, between Miz and Morrison, and shoves Morrison.  Miz exits the ring and Morrison goes after Riley.  While he’s pummeling away on Riley, King Sheamus runs down the ramp and decides he’s going to join in the fun!  He attacks Morrison, but misses, and Morrison unloads on Sheamus.  Riley gets out of the ring as Sheamus attacks Morrison’s injured leg.  Riley moved over to King, for some reason, and King punches him right in the face.  Miz walks up the ramp.

    And I Quote:  “Miz, tonight, you will collide with your ghosts from the past, present, and future, in a six-man tag team match.  You, Alex Riley, and King Sheamus vs. John Morrison, Jerry Lawler, and Randy Orton.”

    Miz is up on the stage now, holding up his championship and yelling about how he’s the champion, when he turns to go backstage, and Randy comes out.  Orton clotheslines Miz to the ground,

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: Last night, John Cena pulls, as we now know, 23 chairs down on top of Wade Barrett.>

    Coming up later, John Cena will address the WWE Universe.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @Niki_Sushi Miz, you need to change and fall in love with me so we can get married and have butt-babies. #WhatColeIsSaying #BWF #RAW

    @kickoutblog When was the last time John Morrison showered?

    @kellylynndobson Backwards Bizarro set!!! This is not good. #RAW #BWF

    @FrankWWEClown Did someone put drugs into my dinner tonight? Or am I really witnessing what I am watching on #RAW right now? #WWE

    @Lunna1969 My 8 year old Niece just groaned and said that she wished CM Punk would read the GM messages! #RAW #WWE #BWF

    Later on tonight, the WWE Champion The Miz, Alex Riley, and King Sheamus will face off against the team of John Morrison, Randy Orton, and Jerry “The King” Lawler.  The Diva’s Champion, Natalya joins Punk, King, and Cole ringside.

    Melina vs Alicia Fox vs Eve Torres to determine the Number One Contender for the WWE Diva’s Championship

    Natalya says that she’s feeling quite dreamy sitting next to King, and then ends up telling him to settle his tea kettle.

    The match starts out, and Alicia Fox goes to town on both Eve Torres and Melina.  She switches back and forth between Eve and Melina for a while, throwing Eve out of the ring and concentrating on Melina.  Melina starts to fight back against Alicia, and then fends off Eve too.   All of them go for quick pins on one another, but none of them get further than two.  Then Melina gets Eve on the top turnbuckle.  Alicia grabs Melina onto her shoulders and holds her there, and then Eve goes to hit a flying cross body on the both of them, but Melina ducks under it, bringing Alicia with her, for a quick pin.

    Melina wins via pinfall.

    Natalya says it was impressive, and goes to congratulate her.  Punk tells her to waffle Melina upside the head, and Natalya ignores him.  She gets in the ring and goes to shake Melina’s hand, but Melina slaps the taste out of Natalya’s mouth and then walks out, her serious face on.

    Nikki and Brie are arguing over Daniel Bryan, over which one is going to win his affections or something.  I have no idea, but it’s nasty.  Anyway, up next, Daniel Bryan has a match!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @kickoutblog “These Divas are so hot.” CM Punk channeling Jerry Lawler circa 1999?

    @HitTheRopes Why isn’t Gail Kim involved in this match?

    @JonHexLives CM Punk: Small package. There’s a joke in there somewhere. #WWE #RAW #BWF

    @KeepItFiveStar Oh shit! Melina heel turn! Follow her lead Heel Nikki! Follow her lead!

    @Niki_Sushi As sick as I am of Melina being the only one getting title shots, it’s better than the Bellas getting a shot. #BWF #RAW

    @kellylynndobson What did the five fingers say to the face……. SLAP! #BWF

    It’s WWE week on USA!  Tonight, technically, Smackdown will be live on USA at 9/8 Central, and WWE Tribute to the Troops is on Wednesday night!  Also, Nexus probably won’t be here tonight.  Crying shame, that.

    United States Daniel Bryan with the Bella Twins vs. William Regal

    I marked out when I saw that his opponent was Regal.  I adore Regal.

    Regal and Bryan lock up as Punk, King, and Cole try to figure out why Regal’s smiling.  Regal automatically throws Bryan to the ground, but Bryan jumps back on his feet and throws Regal down instead.  Regal bounces back up to his feet, and then shakes his finger at Bryan, which makes me laugh.  Regal drops Bryan to the ground, holding onto his arm, and then when Bryan gets up, Regal’s not letting go.  Bryan rolls over to get his arm untwisted, and then goes into this bridge thing for no reason, and then hits a dropkick on Regal.  They lock up again, and Bryan twists Regal’s arm this time.  Regal gets loose and proceeds to kick Bryan’s spine with the toe of his boot.  It apparently pisses Bryan off, because he shoots to his feet and punches Regal, then kicks him hard in the back repeatedly.  Bryan gets Regal in the corner and continues to kick him.  Bryan goes to whip Regal across the ring, but Regal counters and whips Bryan across.  Bryan runs up the ropes and flips over Regal, and then bounces off the ropes and right into Regal’s clothesline.  Regal goes for a quick pin, but Bryan kicks out at two.  Regal holds Bryan in a rather vicious looking headlock, but Bryan fights to his feet.  He lifts Regal out of the air and goes to drop him, but Regal takes him down with him.  Regal keeps the headlock applied, and Bryan fights to his feet, but Regal drops him back on the mat.  Regal finally lets go and punches Bryan in the head a few times, then goes for a cover, but Bryan kicks out at two.  Regal puts his knees in Bryan’s face, then hurls him across the ring.  Bryan bounces off the turnbuckle and then slams right into another clothesline from Regal.  Regal goes for a cover, but Bryan kicks out at two.  Regal then puts Bryan in a full nelson, holding him there as Bryan tries to fight out.  Bryan fights to his feet and then slams his ass against Regal, or at least that’s what it looks like.  Regal and Bryan exchange uppercuts for a while, and then Bryan gets the momentum, only to get punched in the stomach by Regal.  Regal goes for another uppercut, but Bryan catches him, going for a backslide.  Regal fights out of it, and then hits Bryan in the back of the head.  Regal now sets up for the Regal Stretch, but Bryan fights out of it and locks in the LaBell Lock, which Regal fights hard, for the win.

    United States Champion Daniel Bryan wins via submission.

    Regal applauds Bryan, and then the Bellas get in the ring and kiss Bryan.  Bryan looks confused, and I would be too.

    Still to come, the WWE Champion The Miz teams up with Alex Riley and King Sheamus to take on John Morrison, Randy Orton, and Jerry “The King” Lawler!

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @Niki_Sushi Ugh. Fucking Daniel. All we need is ‘What’s up?’ and… shit, I dunno. OMGREGAL! Guess I’ll watch the match now. xD #BWF #RAW

    @HitTheRopes Please give this match time #WWE

    @KeepItFiveStar Please WWE, don’t make this 3 minutes long

    @TKeep123 William Regal is making a Daniel Bryon match almost watchable! Alas, the Labell lock wins out. #WWE #RAW #BWF

    @5CornersxSmootx #RAW #BWF Hide your kids, hide your wife, and call your friends because William Regal and Daniel Bryan is going on. IWC just creamed.

    We come back to John Morrison preparing for this match backstage.  Randy Orton joins him and says that it looks like Morrison’s the new Number One Contender.  Morrison says that the match last night was bogus.  Orton says that if Morrison wins the Championship match against Miz, he’s going after Morrison.  Morrison says if that happens, he’ll be ready.  He trusts Randy will be ready.  Randy says that’s his first mistake: Do not trust him.

    We flash to Santino laying on a towel, and Tamina standing on his back, apparently trying to work out some kink or something.  He asks if she knows what she’s doing, and she says not really.  Maryse walks up and says that it’s cute, ugly takes care of ugly.  It’s good to know after she and Ted beat them tonight, Tamina has a plan B.  Tamina calls her cupcake, and Maryse stands on Santino’s back too.  The two get in each other’s faces, but security carries them off, leaving Santino face down on the floor.

    Mark Henry and Gail Kim are backstage talking about how the air is much fresher because for the first time in six months, the Nexus isn’t on RAW.  They continue to talk, but then are interrupted by Vickie Guerrero, who barks out an ‘excuse me!’ with Dolph Ziggler in tow.  Henry says he takes that back: The air is not as fresh as he thought it was.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @KeepItFiveStar They finally found Tamina some shoes.

    @Niki_Sushi Dude. It’s Christmas, not fucking Valentine’s Day. Stop humping each other and WRESTLE!!! #BWF #RAW

    @5CornersxSmootx #RAW #BWF What a terrible response from Morrison. “Well uh, alright…..I’ll be ready.”

    @HitTheRopes Creative meeting note: “How about we put Gail Kim in a match for #1 Contender for Diva Title…nah, a segment with Mark Henry is better.”


    Santino Marella and Tamina vs Ted DiBiase and Maryse

    Santino walks out, all bent over.  When they get to the ring, Tamina lifts Santino, cracking his back or something, and making it all better.  Santino looks like he’s going to hug her, but seems to remember that he has a match to participate in.  Santino and DiBiase start out, locking up.  Santino makes the Cobra with his hand, and then drops DiBiase to the ground.  DiBiase retaliates by punching Santino in the face.  DiBiase controls the match for a while, hitting a standing dropkick right to Santino’s chin.  DiBiase gets Santino in a headlock and holds him there, Santino reaching and grabbing for the ropes.  Santino fights to his feet and manages to duck the clothesline from DiBiase, and then hits a hip toss on DiBiase.  DiBiase rolls over to the corner, tagging Maryse in as Santino sets up for the Cobra.  Maryse stands behind Santino until he turns around, and Santino forcibly stops himself from hitting the Cobra on her, saying ‘It’s a girl’.  While he fights it, Maryse turns it around on him and he hits himself with the Cobra.  Tamina then comes in and super kicks Maryse right in the face.  She drags her to a corner, pulls her pigtails out, and then climbs up to the top rope.  She’s about to jump off, when Ted goes to get her, but Santino goes to hit the Cobra, only for Ted to send him to the mat.  Tamina hits the Superfly Splash for the win.

    Tamina and Santino Marella win via pinfall.

    Tamina glomps Santino, for that was exactly what that was, and Santino seems to have back problems again.  Then again, after taking that chair from Barrett last night and the beat down from Nexus, I’d have back problems too.  Tamina then carries a celebrating Santino up the ramp.

    Backstage, John Cena makes his way to the ring, regifting some flowers and then drinking someone else’s coffee, I think.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @KeepItFiveStar Tamina used health. Santino restored to 100 HP

    @Niki_Sushi …. Did Tamina just Sweet Chin Music Maryse?! THAT’S COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT! #BWF #RAW

    @HitTheRopes Tamina is wondering: How the heck did @TheBethPhoenix carry Santino around? Dude is NOT light.

    @5CornersxSmootx #RAW #BWF WHY IS JOHN CENA STEALING FLOWERS AND DRINKING OTHER PEOPLE’S COFFEE? #HideYourFlowersHideYourCoffee #IhatePG

    BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR MISTLETOE!!!

    Cena says that they’re extra fired up tonight, and he knows why.  Because tonight is epic, monumental.  He feels good about tonight, he’s gonna do something he should have done a long time ago.  He hugs the guy in the We Hate Cena guy, who looks ashamed.  Cena says that tonight, for the first time in six months, Monday Night RAW is Nexus-free!!  It makes him wanna dance, so he does the dougie.  He even says that they hit rock bottom.  He says it makes him wanna sing.  So, he sings to make Texas happy, of course.  He says that he’s so happy to be there that he has a treat.  He’s commandeered some footage from last night’s TLC.  It Is the footage describing the demise of Wade Barrett.

    <VIDEO PACKGE: Cena puts a panel over Barrett, then pulls chairs on top of him.>

    Cena plays it again, from another camera angle.  Then again, from another camera angle, and yet again in slow motion.  Punk is still aghast over this, by the way, and continues to call Cena a monster.  Cena says that he feels good when he gets a bargain, especially close to the holiday season.  Six months ago, he promised he would get to each and every member of the Nexus, and it took some time, but last night at TLC, he got to each and every member of the Nexus.  That means the winds have finally changed for Barrett and his group of turd burglars, and he can now focus on the more important things, like winning the Royal Rumble and going to Wrestlemania.

    Then, it’s all ruined by Vickie’s screeching.  I MEAN, asking them to excuse her.

    She and Intercontinental champion Dolph Ziggler come out.  Vickie says pardon the interruption, but no one hears her over the crowd.  Pardon the interruption, but John wasn’t the only one who won a match last night.  Cena says that there’s so much hatred in the air, he can’t hear her.  Every time she goes to talk now, the crowd won’t let her speak.  John’s dying as they completely swallow whatever she’s trying to say.  She continues to screech, and he continues to laugh.  Cena tells them to give her the floor, but they won’t do it.  Cena finally has to stand right in front of her to hear her, and finally tells everyone that she said he wasn’t the only one who won last night.  Vickie continues, and says that despite competing in a Triple Threat match, Dolph is still Intercontinental Champion.  And since Cena can show footage, Vickie can show her own footage.

    <VIDEO PACKAGE: Last week at the Slammys, Jerry “The King” Lawler insults Vickie Guerrero.>

    Vickie says that she has come to demand an apology, and if King doesn’t give her one, her boyfriend is going to beat him up.  Jerry asks if it was about her weight.  HE can’t help it if she’s the only Diva in the WWE whose bathtub has stretch marks.  Cena says that Vickie is so fat she wakes up in sections.  Jerry responds with when God said ‘let there be light’, he had to ask Vickie to step out of the way first.  John responds with ‘Vickie’s so fat, her baby pictures had to be taken via satellite.”  Dolph defends Vickie, and Cena stops Dolph, and says that Dolph called Vickie a double bagger, meaning Dolph has to put a bag over his head in case the one over her head breaks.  Dolph used to be afraid of the dark, but then he saw Vickie naked, and was afraid of the light.  It’s about here that Vickie slaps Cena.

    And I Quote: “Since Vickie Guerrero is threatening that her boyfriend, Dolph Ziggler, will beat people up, let’s try it in a match tonight.  Dolph Ziggler vs. John Cena.  And that match will take place right now.”

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @KeepItFiveStar “If You Can’t See Me, GivE Me A Hell Yeah” If they can’t see you, how are they gonna know to give the hell yeah? Worst sign ever

    @kickoutblog JOHN CENA IS BACK… from not leaving!

    @HitTheRopes I’m wondering if Cena handled getting dumped the same way he handled being fired. #wwe

    @Niki_Sushi All I want for Christmas is my Hunter back… is that too much to ask for?! Enough! GIMME A KILLER! #BWF #RAW

    @TKeep123 Vickie, give it up, it’s only a 2 hour show! #WWE #RAW #BWF

    @KeepItFiveStar Boy Jerry Lawler’s all over this RAW tonight

    @kickoutblog Ziggler vs. Cena = good. Vickie fat jokes when she’s no longer fat = lame.

    @5CornersxSmootx #RAW #BWF King is all “Why u mad tho!?” and Punk is facepalming at the table.

    Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler vs John Cena

    Ziggler and Cena circle one another before locking up, and Ziggler wraps his arms around Cena and takes Cena down.  Ziggler goes for an early pin, but Cena gets out before Ziggler can even keep his shoulders down.  Cena and Ziggler lock up again, and Cena gets Ziggler in a headlock, but Ziggler gets to the ropes.  Cena backs off and watches Ziggler.  Ziggler holds his hand up and Cena goes to grab it, but Ziggler kicks him in the stomach and then attacks Cena in the corner.  Ziggler keeps his momentum, whipping Cena across the ring, but Cena counters and then hits the running bulldog on Ziggler, who rolls under the ropes.  Cena catches Ziggler’s foot that time, kicking Ziggler before hitting a fisherman suplex and going for the cover.  Ziggler kicks out, but Cena flings him across the ring, only to run right into the turnbuckle himself.  Ziggler gets up and attacks Cena.  Ziggler whips Cena across the ring, and Cena bounces off the turnbuckle.  Ziggler goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out.  Ziggler then this some hard kicks out Cena before punching him right in the face.  He does it again, knocking Cena down, and goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out.  Ziggler kicks Cena hard, but Cena drops Ziggler.  Cena goes for a cover, but Ziggler kicks out at two.  Cena whips Ziggler, who bounces off the ropes and kicks Cena before going for a cover, but Cena kicks out at two.  Ziggler locks in a hold of some kind, but Cena fights to his feet.  Cena then worms his way up and puts Ziggler up for the Attitude Adjustment, but Ziggler counters by dropping Cena face-first to the mat and then going for the cover, but Cena kicks out at two.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @KeepItFiveStar Oh boy Dolph Ziggler is gonna job out like the guards did to Austin Power’s Dad in Goldmember.

    @CMPunkSays If the #WWE ran Twitter, the Fail Whale would be replaced by the Failure Turtle.

    @Niki_Sushi WWE made a bad move by having their money-maker act like a 10 year old bully. The guys may love it, but Mom’s gonna be pissed. #BWF #RAW

    We come back to Cena gaining momentum, side slamming Ziggler to the mat.  Ziggler and Cena then take each other out with clotheslines.  The ref begins the count, and both men reach their feet, Ziggler first.  Ziggler then drops Cena back to the ground, going for a cover, but Cena kicks out at two.  Ziggler hits a dropkick to the jaw and goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out at two.  Ziggler went for another dropkick, but Cena avoids it.  Cena then comes back with a couple shoulder take downs and sets up for the Five Knuckle Shuffle, which he hits.  Ziggler gets to his feet, and Cena gets Ziggler on his shoulders.  Ziggler fights out and then tries for the sleeper, but Cena counters and locks in the STF.  Vickie stands on the edge, distracting the ref, as Ziggler taps out.  Cena starts to celebrate when he realizes that the ref never saw it.  Ziggler hits the Zig Zag, but Cena kicks out of the following cover at two.  Ziggler then undoes the cover on the turnbuckle, and the ref gets him away from it.  Ziggler grabs the Intercontinental Championship and goes to hit Cena with it, but Cena ducks it and hits the Attitude Adjustment for the win.

    John Cena wins via pinfall.

    Cena gets his arm raised in victory, and then CM Punk gets in the ring and beats Cena with a chair.  Punk then calmly walks away as Cena stands up and glares after Punk.

    Coming up, the six man tag team match.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @KeepItFiveStar C’mon Ziggler! First you do the Fame-asser, then you do a cocky pin?

    @TKeep123 Poor Dolph…having to defend Vickie’s honor! Could be a long night! #WWE #RAW #BWF

    @Niki_Sushi On the off-chance Nexus IS gone, I hope people realize the members still have contracts… #BWF #RAW

    @FrankWWEClown I’M MARKING OUT. I’M MARKING OUT. I’m a Cena fan, but I can’t stop marking out!!! My hometown boy @CMPunk just made a statement! #WWE

    @dasharpshooters Never mess with a man and his Diet Soda Cena. CM PUNK IS BACK IN ACTION! #wwe #raw

    @StrikerSays I’m expecting him to turn green and lose all his clothes except for his purple shorts.

    @HitTheRopes CM Punk has just made a bunch of folks happy and even more pissed off. #WIN

    @ThingsColeSays The Feud That Diet Soda Built: CM Punk vs. John Cena

    @kickoutblog Kick my cat, I kill your dog. Spill my diet soda, I hit you with a steel chair. #PhilosophyofPunk

    Moments ago, Josh Matthews asked CM Punk why he attacked Cena.  Punk responded with the only thing Cena understands is aggression.  Last night, he brutalized Barrett with a steel chair, and tonight, Punk just gave him a dose of his own medicine.

    Backstage, King’s getting ready for his match and is met by Sheamus.  Sheamus says that he sees King still carries around his old crown.  Unlike King, Sheamus earned his crown.  As far as Sheamus is concerned, there’s only room for one king around here.  They’ve been calling King King since 1974.  Sheamus says to spare him the history lesson, because as far as tonight is concerned, the King is dead.  Long live the King.

    Vickie says that she went out there looking for an apology, and Dolph didn’t get her one.  Dolph responds that he’s challenging Cena to  a rematch tomorrow night.  Vickie says that it’s going to be a handicapped match: John Cena vs. Dolph Ziggler and her.

    AWESOME!

    Alex Riley and the WWE Champion The Miz make their way to the ring for their tag team match.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @Niki_Sushi For all that talk about keeping yourself healthy… why isn’t CM Punk wearing a seat belt? #BWF #RAW

    @kickoutblog Vickie is gonna kick Cena’s ass.

    @KeepItFiveStar Dolph, last time you did this, Daniel Bryan beat you three times.

    @TKeep123 “FELLA” in Lawler’s face…. “…I actually eRRRRNed this crown!” King vs King tonight! Hey, wheres the King of Kings? #WWE #RAW #BWF


    WWE Champion The Miz, Alex Riley, and King Sheamus vs John Morrison, Jerry “The King” Lawler, and Randy Orton

    The match starts out with Alex Riley and Randy Orton.  Orton doesn’t seem happy that Miz tagged in Riley right away, and he takes his rage out on Riley.  Orton drags Riley into the middle of the ring and jumps on him, his knees hitting his face.  Orton tags in Morrison, who hits Riley and sends him into the corner.  Morrison whips him into the other corner and then slams into him.  Riley is in Morrison’s corner, but tries to fight out.  Lawler is tagged in and fights against Riley before hitting a dropkick on Riley.  Riley fights back, slamming Lawler into his corner.  Riley tags Miz in and Lawler knocks Miz right off his feet.  Lawler tags in Orton, and Miz flees the ring, running in and tagging Sheamus in.  Sheamus looks like he’s not completely sure what the hell just happened, but climbs in the ring anyway.

    <COMMERCIAL>

    @kickoutblog Miz should be using The Roots version of his theme.

    @Niki_Sushi Yes, Miz is awesome. Just because you’re screaming it into the mic doesn’t mean he’s going to be waiting in your hotel room, Cole. #BWF #RAW

    @CMPunkSays You know what’s sad? Alex Riley has gained more notoriety than the guy who actually WON Season 2 of NXT.

    @TKeep123 One last time to see Jerry “drop the strap”……. I”m hopeful! #RAW #WWE #BWF

    We come back to Lawler being the one in the ring against Sheamus.  Sheamus distracts the ref and Riley gets in a cheap shot.  Sheamus goes for a cover, but Lawler kicks out at two.  Sheamus gets Lawler in an armbar, I believe, and holds him there.  Lawler fights to his feet and is met with a knee to this midsection by Sheamus.  Sheamus runs at Lawler, who moves last second and sends Sheamus shoulder first into the turnbuckle.  Morrison comes in off the tag, and starts to get a good momentum, but seems to hurt his already-injured leg and Sheamus tries to take advantage. Morrison hits his flying chuck, and goes to set up Starship Pain, but Riley distracts him.  He gets up to do it again, but Sheamus knocks him down, bouncing his head off the mat.  Miz comes in off the tag from Sheamus and immediately attacks the injured leg of Morrison.  He slams Morrison down on his knee, tagging Sheamus back in.  Sheamus locks himself around Morrison’s leg, applying pressure, before planting his knees into Morrison’s.  Morrison manages to swing Sheamus around, and Sheamus tags in Riley, who prevents Morrison from reaching his teammates.  Riley continues to go after the injured leg, slamming it against the mat.  Riley gets Morrison in the corner and delivers some hard hits.  Riley tries to get Morrison into his corner and finally gets him off the rope to do so.  Riley tags in Miz, who continues on the injured leg.  Miz goes to jump on Morrison’s leg again, but Morrison kicks Miz out of the ring.  Miz runs back in and stops Morrison before he can tag in a teammate.  Miz tags in Sheamus, who goes right back to the injured leg.  Sheamus delivers hard forearms to Morrison’s chest before going to the cover, but Morrison kicks out at two.  Sheamus gets Morrison in a hold using his leg, but Morrison uses his good leg to get out of it.  Sheamus is having none of it, however, and drops his elbow onto Morrison’s spine.  Sheamus mocks Morrison as he reaches for his teammates before dropping Morrison to the mat.

    Breaking up that huge wall of text, Sheamus gets Morrison in a half Boston crab, and Morrison tries to drag Sheamus to his corner.  Lawler distracts the ref, and Orton runs in, hitting Sheamus to get him to let go of Morrison.  Sheamus recovers quickly, however, and attacks Morrison.  Sheamus tags in Miz, and Miz misses at stopping Morrison, and Morrison tags in Orton.  Orton this a quick flurry of attacks before hitting the scoop slam.  Then, he pulls Miz into the ring and this the DDT.  He goes for a cover, but Sheamus comes in and breaks up the pin.  Morrison takes Sheamus out over the top rope, and Orton drops to his knees.  Miz has his back to Orton, but Riley comes in, taking the RKO meant for Miz.  Miz puts his boot in Orton’s face, and Orton is tagged by Lawler.  Lawler takes down the strap, and Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale, but Orton comes in and hits the RKO, leaving Lawler to pin The Miz.

    Randy Orton, John Morrison, and Jerry “The King” Lawler win via pinfall.

    And I Quote: “The television show, Smackdown, will be live tomorrow night at 9/8 central here on the USA Network from San Antonio, Texas.  In addition to all the Smackdown superstars, RAW’s contribution will be a handicapped match.  As we heard earlier tonight, it’ll be Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero vs John Cena.  Also, just added to tomorrow night’s event, the WWE Champion, The Miz, will take on Randy Orton, live on Smackdown.”

    Miz comes in and attacks Lawler from behind.  Orton goes to set Miz up for the powerbomb, but Riley interferes and Miz flees again.  Randy flat out calls Miz a son of a bitch, by the way.  I heard it clear just now.

    Anywho.  Next Monday, I may not be watching RAW.  My brother, who has been in the Army for the past few months, is going to be here for Christmas, so I may be spending time with him.  I should be able to let you know by Monday.

    Don’t forget to vote for the RAW Tweeter of the Year!!! I’ll see you all later!!

  6. ThinkSoJoE’s Thoughts: Ride it ’til the wheels fall off

    3 Comments

    Welcome once again to the show that never ends, I’m so glad you could attend, come inside, come inside!

    Yes folks, it is I, the patron saint of Bored Wrestling Fans around the world, ThinkSoJoE, back with another ThinkSoJoE’s thoughts.  If you’re wondering about the title of this week’s article, “Ride it ’til the wheels fall off,” which you’ll recognize as a line from R-Truth’s “What’s Up,” I actually literally did just that to my car this week.  Actually, I wasn’t in the car when it happened, and luckily the people who were borrowing my car at the time weren’t hurt.  A lesson for those of you who, like myself, don’t know a damned thing about cars – if you must use a donut spare, it goes on the rear wheels of a front wheel drive vehicle.  Nobody told me that, and three struts broke off of my car and the wheel fell off.

    Anywho, NXT Season 4 started up this week.  Nobody in the United States gives a crap because we don’t get it on television anymore, and I don’t know about any of you, but the web feed on WWE.com is extremely pixelated on my computer.  Rumor going into last week’s announcement of this season’s rookie/pro combinations was that Michael Cole was initially slated to be a pro, but was nixed at the last minute.  So here’s my take.  Rather than have Cole start the season off as an NXT pro, he gets RKO’d on RAW the night before the season premiere.  Cole will undoubtedly seek some kind of protection from future attacks, so have him interrupt an NXT broadcast (webcast?) and proclaim himself as a pro, have his rookie destroy one of the other rookies, and take their spot.  Cole mentors the guy, and in exchange, the rookie watches over Cole on RAW.  Sound good?

    Ahem.  CO-BRA, CO-BRA, CO-BRA!  New WWE Tag Team Champions this week in Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov, with the major assist to John Cena, who distracted Justin Gabriel just long enough to allow Santino’s Cobra to strike.

    Ah, John Cena.  Looks like he’ll be fired for all of four weeks – you know that The Nexus isn’t going anywhere and that without Barrett, there’s nobody fit to lead the group, in my humble opinion.  Look, factions don’t work well without their original leader, save for an HBK-less DX in the late 90s.  Nexus without Barrett would be like The 4 Horsemen without Ric Flair, the nWo without either Hogan or Nash at the helm, or the Straight Edge Society without CM Punk.  Besides, the t-shirts they just released last week feature Barrett’s picture right on them.  He ain’t going anywhere.

    I do love the Top Rope Nexus t-shirts that they were all wearing this week on RAW.  Too bad they cost $40.  BTW, if you’re looking for something to get me for Christmas, get me something for the benefit of those with flash photography.

    Hmm.  Edge got to pick the stipulation for his match with Kane at TLC and picked – wait for it… wait for it… – a TLC match!  You’re kidding!

    Jeff Hardy allegedly showed up in no condition to perform this past Sunday at TNA Final Resolution.  Yet, he still managed to go out and wrestle.  I didn’t see the match, but I’ve heard that Matt Morgan carried him through it.  Good thing for TNA and Jeff Hardy that Matt Morgan does have a pretty good wrestling mind.  Hardy was back in court earlier today, but I’ve heard no more info as of this time.

    Hey, here’s some interesting legal news.  The Tennessee Titans are planning to challenge WWE’s trademark of the word “Titantron.”  Here’s the problem with that.  WWE was using the word “Titantron,” and likely had the trademark, at least two years before the NFL franchise changed their name to the Titans.  The team adopted the name in 1999, nearly 11 years ago, and are just now challenging this trademark.  Good luck with that one.

    Hey, here’s a random thought – if Jeff Hardy is supposed to be in court, isn’t that something that would prevent him from leaving the country and going somewhere like, say, Abu Dhabi?  Ah well, I digress.

    I guess that’s it for now.  I’ll see you all again real soon!

  7. Full House

    4 Comments

    Rather ironically, when I was approached about penning a column on wrestling house shows – I picked up the latest copy of the UK-based grap magazine “Fighting Spirit Magazine”, only to find that they themselves had written an article dedicated to the art and history of the non-televised event. This has happened to me quite a few times in the past when writing for various websites and it’s always freaked me out. I start thinking about an idea for an article, randomly flick through some old or current wrestling mag/book and see what I thought was my idea spread out across the page! This particular instance was no different to all the other ones and actually made me laugh a little bit, kinda like Michael Cole does when John Cena acts all immature. Thankfully, the piece was an awesome read and really helped get my creative juices flowing for putting together my own diatribe.

    Still I find myself lacking the means to really write as many columns as I would like. We don’t have internet in our new flat yet and therefore I’m only managing to write this due to being home for the weekend to visit my family and spend some time chilling out. Quite honestly, I can think of no better ways to relax than watching, thinking and talking about professional wrestling. With that said, let’s take a look at the wonderful world of ‘wrestling on tour’..

    Earlier this month, my good friend Richard Flynn (who is responsible for this weeks WWE Smackdown report – check it out!) and I attended a WWE live event featuring the superstars of the Friday Night Smackdown brand in action. This is a pretty regular occurrence nowadays; for us to attend these shows. On a few occasions in the past, other friends have joined us for a night of live and in colour wrasslin’ entertainment but most of the time it’s simply Flynn and myself geeking it up. To say I love spending time with the guy and watching wrestling with him would be an understatement. The amount of hours we’ve let go past by watching WWE and TNA shows is probably mind-boggling. Not to mention the oodles of time we’ve dedicated to chatting about the aforementioned companies and also our favourite moments from the past. Seriously, we have spent a lot of time thinking about wrestling together. We seem to feed off one another’s passion and it has made for some very cool and very pleasurable afternoons and evenings, to say the least.

    Our continued excitement at attending these WWE and TNA shows is equal to that of pretty much any kid you know who likes wrestling. I’m glad I can say with all seriousness that I am just as thrilled by the thought of seeing this brand of entertainment live today as I would have been had I been fortunate enough to grab tickets for a show when I was 10 years old. Rather unfortunately, whenever the then WWF and then WWE visited these shores back then, I always found myself facing a ticket hotline with no more remaining tickets. As much as my parents tried (my mum phoned as early as she could every time and my dad even drove the 150 miles from our home in Campbeltown to Glasgow on the off chance the venue would still have some seats left), it just never seemed to happen. This is probably just aswell – 10 year old me would likely have passed out with excitement had he been privy to The Rock or Triple H up close!

    As it pertains to the day-to-day running of any wrestling organisation, there can be no arguments that non-televised or “house” show events are the least important they have been for quite some time, maybe even in the entire history of the industry. There is far more stress placed on the signification of a Pay-Per-View event or the rating for an episode of Monday Night RAW than there is for how many fans are drawn to arenas for the next WWE nationwide tour. House shows used to be the place to see your chosen wrestling promotion but has in more recent times been usurped by TV tapings and major shows such as “Wrestlemania”. This shouldn’t take away from the overall necessity of a company touring the country or indeed the world however, far from it. The revenue boosts WWE alone will feel from visiting the UK must be worth the trip. In between ticket sales (and the fact these tickets are snapped up readily due to the scant nature of shows in any given town each year), merchandise and crossover TV appearances, it’s clearly worth the promotions while to head on over the Atlantic frequently. It’s also a valuable tool for TNA, who have played before their biggest crowds when not in the United States. Big, American pro wrestling companies are simply devoured quickly in foreign markets, such is the fascination with only having one or two chances per annum to see them.

    Due to this shift in how a wrestling company, specifically WWE, views its un-televised product, it’s far more of a mixed bag when you attend one these shows. What I’m getting at here is that it’s a clear learning ground for younger members of the roster and a chance for established superstars to try out new things and further develop their characters, far away from the scathing perfection of television. It has been really rather interesting to view things at the handful of house shows Richard and I have bought tickets to which would NEVER feature on WWE TV or PPV. As mentioned before, this can bring both positives and negatives along with it. It’s engrossing to view someone such as Chavo Guerrero, a man scarcely used on the air, be allowed to partake in a 12-minute long match and fully show off his skills to the audience. On the other side of the coin, it can be disheartening to know that nothing of any great significance is likely to happen on the show in your town.

    This leads me rather nicely onto an argument which has been permeating wrestling writers and fans over and across the world; have WWE officials decreed that their wrestlers shouldn’t work quite so hard and take so many chances at a non-televised show as they would when the cameras are rolling, thus reducing the risk of injuring themselves or a peer?

    If this is the case then it could be argued as short-changing the loyal fan who is excited to see the company and expects to see something pretty close to what he sees on TV each and every week. Surely, with the prices as they are for admission to the typical WWE or TNA house show (I.e not very cheap!), it’s not being cheeky to expect a level of performance matching that of what you are used to. To be completely fair to TNA, they encourage their performers to give their all, regardless of the platform or if the event is being filmed. Having witnessed this with my own 2 eyes, it does make for a thrilling spectacle.

    Again, using the proverbial “other side”, I really don’t think the overall feel of the shows have suffered that much. Having been in attendance for a couple of RAW-brand house shows and a few Smackdown-brand ones, the match-quality has been pretty darn good. Sure, there are restholds and not nearly as many high-flying antics as we would see on TV but it’s not exactly a million miles away from your typical match on Monday Night RAW. Infact, I’d go as far to say that the promotion makes up for this with some well-placed and excellently executed (oh boy..) storyline goodness. This writer can recall just earlier this month some TV-inspired goings on with the “Nexus” stable and also some in-ring promo’s which draw you closer into the show. Therefore, I don’t think it’d be fair to say that either WWE nor TNA treat the fans with disdain in the house show market, certainly not on this side of the pond.

    With all this said, what do YOU think? Have you attended a WWE or TNA house show event in which you’ve wished you’d saved your money? Did you wish instead that you’d spend some extra cash to go to a TV taping or Pay-Per-View? Or were you like me and felt both companies did their utmost to put on a good evenings entertainment and ensure the fans would come back in droves the next time around? Your thoughts are every bit as important as mine and opinions are definitely a huge part of what makes Bored Wrestling Fan and wrestling fans in general so great! Let me know what you reckon, either by leaving me a comment below or by sending me a quickfire email to jamiekennedy@live.com ! Until the next time, TAKE IT HOME! To your house. To your house uh…show..

  8. WWE RAW results 11/29/10

    3 Comments

    It is I, the King of the BoredWrestlingFan crew, and I have returned for a second straight week with a review of wWE RAW!  I took over writing duties for tonight after the show ended, so I won’t be using tweets in tonight’s review (sorry, @TKeep123, @WWEsAngel_Nef, among others).  AlyKat should be back next week.  She would have been back this week, but she’s spent the last week popping open bottles of champagne due to The Miz’s WWE Championship victory and her wrists hurt too badly to type.  Are you ready?  Because tonight’s show is simply this:  RAWWWWWESOME!

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  9. WWE RAW results 11/22/10

    8 Comments

    Hey folks, the man the BWF staff call “Boss” is here to fill in for AlyKat tonight as she is in attendance at the Amway Arena in Orlando, FL for tonight’s edition of RAW.  I’ve actually been to a WWE event in that very venue – the 2008 WWE Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony.  Tonight, however, I’m on my couch in Niagara Falls, NY watching USA HD and bringing you my thoughts on this post-Survivor Series edition of RAW.  Will we see John Cena tonight?  What kind of mood will Wade Barrett be in?  Will Aly have a heart attack in the Amway Arena as The Miz cashes in Money In The Bank?  Who knows!  It’s uncooked, uncut, uncensored, it’s RAW!

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