Welcome, it’s your once regular but could now only be described as freelance writer for BWF back again, with another random column. This time, I’ve been looking back to the past as I do, and it got me thinking.. what if someone got revenge on another, by doing the same thing, that the original person done in the first place, rather than just beating them in a match?
If that intro makes no sense, it’s because I could not word the intro. The idea was there, but when it came time to write a suitable intro the the piece.. nothing. So that was the best I could come up with.. anyways, to try and explain the intro.
Big Show gets revenge on the Big Bossman for towing Big Show’s daddy’s coffin away during the funeral.
As we all know, leading up to the Survivor Series PPV of 1999, the Big Show, lost his father. This allowed the number one contender, the Big Bossman, to take advantage of the situation. After reading out a poem degrading the Big Show’s father, he then persuaded the Big Show’s mother to admit that the Big Show was an illegitimate child or bastard. But the most memorable moment of this feud, occured on the 11/11/99 edition of WWF SmackDown!, in which the Big Bossman, interrupting the funeral of the Big Show’s father, towed the casket away in his police car, with the Big Show trying to stop it. Now, these two would compete at the Survivor Series, in which the Big Show defeated the Big Bossman, Prince Albert, Mideon and Viscera in a 4-1 Survivor Series. The feud would continue to Armageddon, in which the Big Show finally got his revenge on the Big Bossman, by defeating him in a one-on-one match, even though Prince Albert tried to intefere on the Bissman’s behalf, only to be treated to a trip through the Spanish Announce table, courtesy of the Big Show.
In 2004.. the Big Bossman passed away of a heart attack at age 41.
What if the storyline read.. the Big Show wanted the ultimate revenge. Five long years after the Big Bossman towed the Big Show’s father’s casket away from the burial site to god knows where (Where did the Big Bossman take that casket.. maybe that’s another column), the Big Show gets revenge by towing the Big Bossman’s casket away from his family, during the burial process, thus finally getting revenge on the man who ruined his life five years earlier. In 2004, the Big Show wasn’t really seen on WWE television, until Septembe, when he interfered in a Kurt Angle/Eddie Guerrero Lumberjack match.
Rumour has it, that if A-Train, Prince Albert’s new persona, was not injured on the June 21, 2004 edition of WWE Raw, that the Big Show and Albert would feud, and that the Big Show would in fact tow the casket of the Big Bossman, A-Train’s running buddy at the time. However, at the time, the Big Bossman had not passed, and the Big Show returned to feud with Kurt Angle. However, when the Bossman did pass away September 22 of that year, the WWE were so angry, that they fired A-Train on November 1, and the whole revenge feud was dropped.
And that my friends, is the reason why people get revenge by winning matches in the wrestling business, and not by other means.
Alright, it’s Monday Night around 1 AM which means I’ve been playing Spider Solitaire and completely ignoring my facebook and twitter accounts in an effort to avoid spoilers. And since I was on a bus while this show was on and therefore unable to vote, it is my right – nay, my duty to complain about the results of each poll. This is the first time the WWE is ever putting the power in the hands of the people (since they canceled the Cyber Sunday PPV), so this could be interesting. Let’s get started…
Well with then end of the world not happening or now not happening until October, I guess we are here for a few more months I guess. Well that’s not really a bad thing since we are still up and running to give you the best at what we do, what ever that may be. So now without further ado, here’s what I do: (more…)
No disrespect to the fans with the title. I’m a fan myself but this show with all this innuendo of changes lacked any. The ring and outside arena still had TNA posted everywhere with a hue of blue and added rows of seats which another reviewer on TNAsylum pointed out. Was that the change? I doubt it. But here’s to Thursday on finding out. Well lets get into what TNA Impact Wrestling is all about. Impact Wrestling presents Sacrifice.
Mexican America vs Ink Inc.
I wasn’t expecting much from this match. I mean Anarquia has shown a total disregard to impress and Hernandez just doesn’t seem to care anymore. But then you have Jesse Neal and his infectious energy makes me smile. Oh and Shannon Moore and his book make me shake my head. But then seeing as how Moore had one of the best spots of the evening. Sailing off the ring onto Hernandez with a moonsault. The match was sub par besides with predictable interference by Rosita and Sarita. And a botched over the top rope clothesline by Moore on Anarquia. Shockingly due to a miscommunication involving Moore attempting to hit Rosita and Neal objecting. Hernandez was able to hit his modified border toss on Neal giving the win to Mex America. Why was I shocked? Ink Inc is the number one contender for the tag titles leading into Slammiversary. I’m adamant that Christina Von Eerie should be there as well but that is probably wishful thinking. So naturally, Ink Inc getting the win would make them look strong going in. But we still have 3 weeks to make amends.
Hopefully with it now being iMPACT Wrestling we can stop having Promos in our PPV’s. We get one here as Jeff and Karen come out to announce that they can not compete in the mixed tag match. Foley comes out again the announcement “wrestling matters” is uttered. He tells the Jarretts that the next time they bring X rays make sure it doesn’t belong to a 6’6 African American male. Karen shrieks throws off boot in a temper tantrum leading to Mick exiting. Match on. The crowd is amp to have Chyna.
Brian Kendrick…shoots a promo on the X Division. I wish I knew what he was saying since he is all mystical and what not. All I caught was the word molested. I don’t now in what context. But it was said. To sum up he just promises to show how important the X division is.
Brian Kendrick vs Robbie E w/ Cookie.
Robbie comes out as Cookie walks out messing with he phone/camera? Anyway the crowd seems to be nonchalant. Mr. Gym Tan Wrestling, fist pumps for Cookie while she takes a picture. Again the crowd could care less. Kendrick steps out in his white robe to a good crowd pop. Kendrick 1, Robbie 0. Once in he puts on his gimmick meditating dead center in the ring. Cookie, trying to win a screeching contest against Karen shouts that “you’re a freak!” As Robbie holds her back. Exit Cookie. And we have Kendrick alive and booting E in the face. Kendrick 2, Robbie 0. Then the junior banshee interferes. Distracted Robbie takes control beating Kendrick ragged even getting him outside of the ring. Where Cook’s proceeds to choke him with her boot. Robbie setting up for his signature neck-breaker (god forbid I have no idea what’s its called. And I refuse to call it “Rude Awakening” in fear that Rick would haunt me) Reversed. Kendrick beats Rob with a dropkick into a pin. Huh?! I knew he sucked but really. Kendrick acts all crazy holding Earl Hebner’s hand. He even weirds out Rob when he tries to shake his hand. Your winner: Kendrick.
Promo time again folks. But this time its hot cougarish Tara. Trust me I’ve seen this woman without make-up Vickie has nothing on her. Tara’s unhappy with Madison. The bossiness and in general being a lackey. Then Madison appears to remind Tara about how she has a job because of her. Folks I won’t lie when she came on all that kept going through my mind was “Why is she here?” “She should of stayed in a shimmer tag team” and my favorite thought “God, please severe her vocal cords. please I’ll go to church,eventually”. Time for the match.
Mickie James (c) vs Madison Rayne (With Tara’s freedom on the line)
Here comes the Queen Bee (seriously she has a sash with the title) and the gaudiest oversized crown I’ve ever seen. That better be from the dollar general. In full royal mode, the crowd is dead. Canned heat where are you? In the words of another TNA watcher, The Rayne Experiment has failed. No one and I do mean no one cared when she came out. Then Mickie came out. The roof exploded. She could do no wrong. I seriously believe that she could of killed a puppy and folks would still cheer for her. Lets get ready to… Tara’s theme music hits. The crowd breaks into further excitement. Again the Rayne Experiment elicits no response. A faceoff between Rayne and Tara distracts long enough for Mickie to get on the offensive. Tara seems conflicted. Should she hit Mickie. Only a minute in and I’m already sensing an overbook coming on.
To break it down simply this match is a TNA haters dream. Overbooking. check. horrible in ring competitor. check. A last minute reintroduction of the loaded glove. check. Tara makes the save for Mickie after 2!! Ref bumps. Tara finally makes the decision to cold cock Rayne with the loaded glove letting Mickie get the 3count. Crap match over.
Sorry about that but I was a big fan of the Knock out division. In 2009. This was a bad match indeed. But it will get better in the future, right? No. Chances are we will see Velvet Sky vs Mickie for the title. At least she’s over?!
Fortune promo. Line remembered. Kaz- Max Buck you wouldn’t be a star even if thrown by a ninja. Or something to that effect. Other smack talk by Beer Money and AJ. Next.
Max Buck vs Kazarian(c)
Good mat wrestling. (I swore when this was going on someone yelled “boring”) Buck plays the egotistical heel to perfection. Slapping and name calling. Some really cool spots with a over the ropes leg drop. Buck reversed 3 fade to blacks by Kaz. Kaz follows up with a powerbomb to the outside. Buck comes in with a top rope cutter and a 450 degree splash for a two count. Kaz goes old school (shout out to Allison Danger) and beats Buck with a shining wizard. Good. Now if only it was hyped.
Promo. A 6’6 360lb homeless man talks about pain and breaking a undefeated streak. Then I realize that its Abyss. Next up its TNA’s John Cena taking on Crimson.
With Crimson’s imaginary 5 month winning streak on the line (I now I’m being harsh but times have changed from Samoa Joe) he takes on Abyss strong only slowing down when he spears a turnbuckle. After that the Cena of TNA controls the majority of the match. Crimson resumes control with one double clothesline and a seven count. Abyss reverses with a chokeslam. then comes Janice. Crimson spears Abyss, Abyss loses Janice. Crimson goes to the well once too often and is big booted. Abyss pulls out a Vader Bomb from the corner. 2 count. Crimson hits Cena with the Red Sky Powerbomb (D’lo Brown’s Sky High) keeping his streak intact. After some posturing Abyss goes back to lick his wounds. Now please can we have Joe vs Crimson now?
Promo. Its like deja vu. No. Its a vignette. Beer Money vs Hardy/Harris
I’ll keep it short. Harris plays a heel and won’t fight Storm one on one. He’ll only sneak attack. So no big showdown between the two. Which would of made sense. Remember 2006 when the team of AMW split? Storm was the one who attacked Harris. Almost taking out an eye. Leading to that hilarious blindfold match. Well now its Harris’ turn to play heel as he and Matt lose after Beer Money hits Harris with the AMW finisher Death Sentence. Mind Games no avail. Next.
Oh its Bully Ray being interviewed by Jeremy Borash. And he is being a bully threatening to beat on Borash and making lewd comments about AJ’s wife. I hope she isn’t watching. So we will see Ray vs Styles? Nope.
Dreamer vs Styles
Lets keep it real short. Ray interferes in this No DQ bout this sets Styles up for a piledriver on a table. Dreamer wins. Next.
Another vignette. Not complaining as long as its not a promo.
The Jarret’s vs Angle/Chyna
Kurt is an undiscovered comedian. His smirk during the entire match was classic. It brought back memories of the axe wielding incident at the wedding. Chyna is over big time. Fans are chanting for her to kick Karen’s butt. After a good back and forth between Jarret and Angle, Chyna is finally tagged in. The fans erupt. false alarm. Jarret stays in the ring and continues the fight with Kurt. Angle goes for his exploding triple Germans then an Angle slam. 2count. Chyna comes in and body slams then vertical suplexe’s Jarret. Eventually chasing Karen back into the ring Chyna splashes Karen in the corner. Karen dazed is hit with the double under hook DDT. (pedigree for wwe fans). Chyna locks in the ankle lock followed by Kurt on Jarret. Karen taps. Angle/Chyna victorious.
Main Event Vignette.-Then Anderson comes out to blog and commentate.
RVD vs Sting
The match is decent. Rob shows off. Sting pulls out some moves. They fight in the crowd. RVD pulls an impressive cross body onto Sting from the second stands. Sting blocks Rolling Thunder. A Stinger Splash is countered by a spin kick. One botched deathdrop then a rinse and repeat Deathdrop closes the match with the win for Sting. Afterwards Anderson has a stare down with Sting. Slammiversary IX promo
And that is the end of Sacrifice. Wasn’t great but I didn’t pay for it so decent. Here’s hoping for the iMPACT arena changes come Thursday.
Coming hot off the heels as possibly the worst PPV of all time, TNA has some problems to deal with. First, Jeff Hardy screwed up again, showing up likely high as a kite and Sting refused to work with him. Second, they gave us a non-finish for the number one contender’s match between Mr. Anderson and RVD. Third, Some Internet Guy had possibly the best match on the card with AJ Styles. What in the hell? (more…)
In the week following the Royal Rumble, all eyes in wrestling certainly would be on the winner of that said event. While amongst the dirt sheets, there is much argument about the value of a Rumble win in lieu of the Elimination Chamber PPV hurting it’s credibility. But that, is an argument for another day. There was also a RAW rumble match of significance this week, with the winner going on to face the Miz for the title. These two events will have significantly influenced this weeks poll. (more…)
Whoop-dee-do! It’s Thursday Night Suffering Time! According to some semi-spoilers I’ve run across (unintentionally), some are saying this is a sure contender for the worst iMPACT of ALL time. Great, and it’s my job to review it. Expects tangents… many, many umm… (more…)
Last week: Dolph Ziggler lost his Intercontinental title to Kofi Kingston, immediately lost his rematch, and then turned everything around by winning a Fatal Four Way match to determine the No. 1 Contender for Edge’s World Heavyweight Championship. Give the assist to Vickie Guerrero who, in Teddy Long’s absence, inserted her boyfriend into the bout at the last minute. Tonight, will we see repercussions of Vickie’s invasive ways? Elsewhere on the program, Big Show seeks revenge on Wade Barrett, who made a surprise appearance on the show (and whose elbow made a lasting impression on… the Show. See what I did there, guys? Show? Big Show? Yeah…? Okay, that was terrible. Let’s pretend it never happened.)
It’s two weeks ‘til the Royal Rumble! I am very excited. The Rumble has been my favourite event since I was a wee boy. Even if the overall match isn’t great, every Rumble has at least a couple of classic moments. The big question is – who will win this year? Alberto Del Rio seems pretty confident about headlining WrestleMania, but I hope we get a curveball instead. Anyway, on with the show…
Speaking of Del Rio, he kicks off tonight’s show with an in-ring promo. In short, he says it’s his destiny to win the Royal Rumble and become the new ‘Mr. WrestleMania’. R-Truth soon interrupts. He says that Alberto won’t win the Royal Rumble match because he has fancy cars, or his own ‘creepy’ ring announcer. At one point, he calls Alberto, ‘Lucy’. I’m guessing that’s some sort of US television reference that I don’t get. Another interruption; this time courtesy of Dashing Cody Rhodes. He gives his own speech about how he’s going to win the Rumble and, sure enough, we get another interruption as Rey Mysterio’s music hits. Rey gives his usual spiel about fighting the odds and such. He mentions that Alberto Del Rio hasn’t won a Royal Rumble, which is a moot point seeing as Del Rio hasn’t even been in the WWE for a year! Maybe I’m taking this too seriously… Cody Rhodes has a great comeback, saying that Rey’s Rumble win ‘is so 2006.’ The four men end up brawling, before Teddy Long’s music inevitably hits. He announces that Alberto Del Rio and Cody Rhodes will take on R-Truth and Rey Mysterio… next.
Rey Mysterio/R-Truth vs. Alberto Del Rio/Cody Rhodes: There’s not much to write home about in this match, so let’s skip ahead to everyone’s favourite part, the Obligatory Tag Match Breakdown Time™! R-Truth makes the hot tag to Rey, who bounds in and starts laying into Cody Rhodes. Rey hits a Sunset Flip, but Del Rio breaks up the count with a dropkick. R-Truth takes him out of the equation, only to be thrown over the top rope by Rhodes. Rey sets up and hits the 619, follows with a splash, and picks up the win. Pretty standard match with a predictable ending. Ho hum, etc.
Your winners: Rey Mysterio/R-Truth
During the ad break, we’re treated to a ‘Did You Know?’ which states that the WWE has been granting wishes for the Make-A-Wish foundation since 1982, ‘before the entire cast of Jersey Shore was even born.’ Boy, check out WWE, being all hip and current and… dope. Do kids still say ‘dope’?
Speaking of which, it’s time for another edition of ‘Str8 Outta Brooklyn with JTG.’ Let’s just move on swiftly, shall we?
Wade Barrett is backstage, being interviewed by Todd Grisham. I always feel a pang of guilt when I see Todd backstage on SmackDown!; as if I’m cheating on him by listening to the commentary of others, and he cries himself to sleep at night whilst clutching an announcer’s headset close to his chest. Anyway, Barrett vows to take Big Show down tonight. We’re then treated to a frankly terrifying hype video for Ezekiel Jackson’s impending return to SmackDown!. Scary stuff.
Drew McIntyre vs. Trent Baretta: Hey, it’s Trent Baretta! He’s okay! He wastes no time, going for McIntyre before the Sinister Scotsman has even managed to step through the ropes. His offensive flurry is short-lived, however; Drew is soon slamming the former Dudebuster’s face into the announce desk and even backhands him in the face! How rude. Baretta eventually gets a small reprieve, but the crowd don’t seem interested in getting behind him, which is a shame. In fact, some members of the crowd actually cheer when McIntyre signals for the end with a ‘thumbs down’. Drew picks up Baretta and goes to dump him over the ropes, but Baretta counters into a pin and gets the 3-count! Holy crap, didn’t see that coming! Drew McIntyre is furious.
Your winner: Trent Baretta
We return from an ad break to see Trent Baretta walking backstage. Drew McIntyre jumps him, but the Scotsman’s attack is soon halted by the appearance of Kelly Kelly. He tries to plea his case, but she screams at him to grow up and storms off.
Big Show vs. Wade Barrett: Barrett’s music is pretty dreadful. It’s some sort of pseudo-electro-rock track. Hopefully he’ll get a better one soon. Big Show makes several attempts to take out Wade with a Chokeslam, but the Englishman keeps finding ways to evade. The final attempt sees Show thwarted by… Heath Slater! The ref calls for the bell as Justin Gabriel runs into the ring as well. I guess that explains where Gabriel and Slater ran off to after they turned their backs on CM Punk’s initiation over on RAW… All of a sudden, Ezekiel Jackson appears. For some reason, this sends Michael Cole into a frenzy, calling Jackson’s appearance ‘insane’, as if it was Ric Flair or Sting who had just shown up, as opposed to an actual WWE roster member who is due to return from injury. Jackson and Big Show have a stare down, which allows the former Nexus members to attack Show from behind. Who will Jackson side with? Big Show punches a steel chair out of Justin Gabriel’s hand, then turns around and is taken down by Ezekiel Jackson’s clothesline. Everyone starts kicking into Big Show – I guess that means Jackson is aligned with Barrett, Slater and Gabriel. Zeke lifts Big Show up and hits a powerslam, as Matt Striker announces that ‘SmackDown! may never be the same again.’ Gabriel provides the exclamation point with his 450 Splash, and this new faction (I’m guessing I can call them a faction?) celebrate their domination over Big Show. I have just one thing to say about all of this: please change the music…
Your winner (not that anyone’s interested in that at this point): Big Show via DQ
Michelle McCool vs. Beth Phoenix: McCool immediately targets Beth’s rehabilitated left knee. Beth eventually manages to fight back, and hits an awesome springboard suplex. I never get tired of that move. Beth sets up the Glam Slam, but Michelle manages to roll through. She gets a 2-count, then Beth counters into a pin attempt of her own and steals the 3.
Your winner: Beth Phoenix
Backstage, Dolph and Vickie are reconciling after tensions arose between them last week. The end result is an extended Eskimo kiss. That would have been cute if we replaced Vickie with someone else. I have a few suggestions, but I’ll go ahead and keep those to myself…
Kofi Kingston vs. Jack Swagger: Josh Mathews thanks the WWE Universe for making last week the most-watched SmackDown! ever on SyFy. Is it possible that spoilers regarding Dolph’s push were partially responsible? I’m gonna blindly presume ‘yes,’ and not question anything, because I’m a big fanboy and don’t like to listen to reason. Anyway, Kofi has a mic and says he’s proud to once again be Intercontinental champ. He doesn’t get much further, because Jack Swagger’s music hits. Swagger’s not as fun without his Soaring Eagle. I’m still certain that the Eagle will make a Rumble appearance, by the way. I’d bet money on it. This match was back-and-forth, but Kofi eventually managed to hit the SOS and get the pinfall victory.
Your winner: Kofi Kingston
It’s time for Cutting Edge. The Rated R SOOOOperstar introduces Dolph Ziggler and Vickie Guerrero. As they approach the ring, Michael Cole confirms that Ziggler’s match with Edge will take place at the Royal Rumble. Sweet. This segment contains its fair share of ‘Vickie is fat and ugly’ jokes. We’ve heard it all before, so I’ll spare you the details. Ziggler says when Vickie and Edge first got together all those years back, Vickie resuscitated Edge’s entire career; at the Rumble, Dolph is gonna pull the plug and watch it flatline. Nice terminology there. Vickie shows a clip from back in July 2008 – remember when Alicia Fox was Edge and Vickie’s wedding planner, and Edge got his smooch on with her? That was back when I first started watching wrestling regularly again. Holy crap. Feels like a lifetime ago! SmackDown! has aged me, ladies and gentlemen. I’m an old soul now; just like those chaps from Inception… Edge accepts that cheating is a terrible thing, but counters that he has a clip of his own to roll. This one shows Dolph and Kaitlyn (remember her?) kissing backstage during Season 3 of NXT… Uh oh. Edge starts to rub the salt in, but Ziggler snaps and starts beating him down. Edge responds with a big boot, which sends Ziggler to the outside. Vickie gives Edge a few slaps to the face, but the champ chooses to walk away. He steps through the ropes, and Vickie starts cackling about how untouchable she is. Edge’s expression changes, and he slowly gets back into the ring. It looks like he’s going to Spear Vickie, but Dolph sweeps his legs and drags him to the outside. He sets Edge up, then hits a Zigzag, sending Edge’s head and neck slamming into the steel steps. Vickie joins Dolph at ringside, stands over Edge’s body, and plants a big kiss on her boyfriend. Yeuch.
That’s all for this week! Make sure to check make next time for more SmackDown! goodness. Cheers!
Oh how things can change in one weeks time! Once again I return to bring you this week’s power poll. Sadly, I am a little strapped for time and this will not be an animated gif version of the article. However, it will still be a nice look at the IWC’s perception of the top stars amongst the contributing websites. (more…)
