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The Over the Limit PPV is this Sunday, and this is the last show before the WWE expects you to pay your hard earned money to pay for broadband internet to access pirate streams to ante up for the show! Will it suck? Only one way to find out!
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Hey, everybody! I hope you enjoyed Wrestlemania 26, but now its time for the WWE’s D show (maybe F show…I’m not sure if AM RAW beats Superstars in ratings or not. I haven’t checked on that.)
Match 1: Kofi Kingston and MVP vs Zack Ryder and Carlito
Kofi and MVP get the win after Kofi hits Carlito with the Trouble in Paradise.
Match 2: William Regal vs Yoshi Tatsu
Yoshi gets the win with a kick to the head.
Match 3: Hart Dynasty vs Caylon Croft and Trent Baretta (The Dudebusters)
Tyson Kidd forces Baretta to tap out with the Sharpshooter after hitting the Hart Attack. Hopefully this will be the build for them to become Tag Champs
Alright, Peeps. That’s it for this week. It’s another random Superstars and thus another random results column.
Peace out
Welcome all to another edition of Random Randomness. Happy St. Patrick’s day to all those who celebrate it on Wednesday. Here in JTland the celebration has already started. But we’re not here to talk about that this is a wrestling website so lets talk about wrestling:
Alright folks, the former No Way Out is now the Elimination Chamber, and following the opening video and pyro, the WWE is wasting no time getting started (ok, they are, but I want to get started, dammit), and neither are we!
Don Johnson and the dude from Napolean Dynamite host RAW tonight, and The Undertaker has vowed to confront Shawn Michaels over his challenges to a rematch at WrestleMania 26 tonight on RAW! Let’s go!
Tune in at the top of the hour for live coverage of Monday Night RAW, with guest host, Bret ‘Hitman’ Hart.
We begin with a promo for Bret Hart, ending with the comments made between Vince and Shawn last week, in which ‘only good things will happen’.
Enter the Hitman… to new music. It sounds the same, but it’s got more of a rock feel to it.
“I guess Hell’s frozen over” – Bret Hart
The Hitman talks about why he has came back, and thanks the fans for still supporting him. He flashbacks to his past, and then gets right down to the nitty gritty. Bret Hart calls out Shawn Michaels.
Enter the Michaels.
Hart wants a truce between himself and HBK. Shawn decides to let rip on the Hitman, stating that he deserved what he got that night, and that he did have a part in the actions of that fateful night in Montreal. Shawn says that there are parts of him that doesn’t want to forgive him. He then goes on to say, that whenever he thinks of Bret Hart, he doesn’t think of Montreal, he thinks of Anaheim, California, and the 60-minute Iron match (his words, not mine). Michaels agrees with Bret, that he wants to bury the hatchet.
Hart says that Michaels wasn’t the easiest man to get along with, but says that now, he doesn’t want either career to be remembered for that night. Bret offers his hand, Shawn shakes it, and the truce is made. They finish with a hug, and that moment right there, is a moment I will never forget.
However, Bret’s not done. Hart calls out… Vince McMahon!! However, Vince doesn’t show.
PREVIEW FOR TONIGHT’S SHOW
Randy Orton vs. Kofi Kingston
D-Generation X (c) vs. JeriShow – Unified Tag Team Championships
We’ll be right back.
We return to find Josh Matthews outside Vince’s office. Apparently, Vince was in a meeting and didn’t hear the Hitman call him out.
Cole and King tells us that Melina was injured in a House Show recently, and thus has been stripped of whatever title she holds. An 8-Diva tournament will be held to determine the new Champion.
TOURNAMENT MATCH#1: Maryse vs. Brie Bella w/Nikki Bella
Oh look, a divas match, watch me not care.
The Twins switched, but that didn’t help.
YOUR WINNER: Maryse
Enter the Miz… and he has music. It says he’s awesome. He says that if Maryse wins, he might just call her back. Miz disagrees with 2010 being the year of Maryse, and says it’s the year of the Miz.
MATCH #2: FATAL FOUR WAY
#1 Contender Match: United States Championship
MVP vs. Jack Swagger vs. Carlito vs. Mark Henry
Don’t get suckered in by iMPACT!. join me after the break…
We return, already in action, and we are shown that Mark Henry was taken out of the matchup for now. Swagger with a PowerSlam-type move on Carlito for a near fall. Swagger then tries for a pin on MVP for another near fall. Swagger nails Carlito in the corner, as MVP gets out of the way. Henry is back in the ring, and starts cleaning house. Carlito is used as a weapon, before being put in a Bearhug. The All-American American American American breaks up the Bearhug, but receives a Torture Rack for his troubles. They take Henry out again, and MVP nails the Playmaker on Swagger for the win.
YOUR WINNER and #1 Contender: MVP
Jericho and Show are talking backstage. If Jericho loses tonight, then he’s off RAW. But the Ayatollah of Rock-N-Rollah has a plan, and he’s off to see the Hitman, the Wonderful Hitman of RAW.
Another break.. Y’all come back now.
We return to find out, that Fozzy’s new song “Martyr No More” is the offical song of the Royal Rumble!! Yieewwww
In the Hitman’s Office, enter the Jericho. He suggests Bret be the Guest Referee for the tag title match, so that Bret can screw Michaels. The Hitman doesn’t want to do another Montreal, Jericho thinks it’s an act.
Hornswoggle and Triple H are flogging off the new Mattel line of WWE toys. Hornswoggle wants to play, and Trips says no, until they retain the titles. Shawn enters and asks why Hunter treats Hornswoggle like a little boy, when he has a beard. Helmsley then brings in his Jericho impersonator (Santino Marella) , and sicks Hornswoggle onto him.
Hornswoggle, is now Triple H’s lap dog. Literally.
The Tag Titles are on the line, NEXT!!
Last week, over 2 million females watched RAW. Woop de fucking do.
MATCH #3: Unified Tag Team Championship
D-Generation X (c) vs. Chris Jericho and the Big Show
DX go for the advantage early, but Big Show ends up double suplexing both members.
A commercial follows.
Back from the break, and the challengers are in total control. Jericho just mocked a certain Hulk Hogan in the ring. Gee, I wonder why? Triple H with the Spinebuster! Both men down.
HBK trying to get Big Show down, and finally succeeds, before heading up top, and getting knocked down by Jericho. Hornswoggle gets involved as well, but it only leads to two. Michaels looks for Sweet Chin Music, but Shwo counters into a Chokeslam! Big Show looks for the cover, but Michaels kicks out. Jericho looks for the Walls, but HBK gets the tag to Triple H. A pedigree to Jericho, but Show breaks it up.
Big Show and Michaels out of the ring, and Jericho tries to steal the win, but only gets two. Y2J then hits the CodeBreaker!. but both men are down. Jericho finally goes the cover, but HBK breaks it up. Hronswoggle looks for Sweet Chin on Jericho, but he is knocked down. Jericho looks for the Walls on the Game, but HBK nails Sweet Chin Music, and Trips gets the fall.
YOUR WINNERS: D-Generation X
Stop. Commercial Time.
We return to see Chris Jericho leaving RAW, as per the pre-match stipulation.
Someone’s knocking on Vinnie Mac’s door, and it’s Randall. He has a business proposal for Vince. He wants to kick Bret’s head off, in exchange for the #30 spot in the Rumble. But Vince has his own security, and tells Randy to bugger off. Enter the Legacy. DiBiase and Rhodes want to repay the favour, from last week, by sitting ringside during Orton’s match with Kofi Kingston. Oh, and if Randy doesn’t win, they’re gonna throw him outta Legacy!
Find out (maybe), after the break!
TNA Genesis just got advertised during a RAW commercial. Somebody’s getting fired.
Next Week’s Guest Host… ‘Iron’ Mike Tyson!
Recap of last week’s title match between John Cena and Sheamus.
Enter the Sheamus. He says he’s the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be. Does he not remember who the Guest Host is? Anyways, enter the… Bourne?
He wants a title shot, and thinks he can beat the Champion? HA! Sheamus calls him Little Evan Bourne, and asks for a referee.
If Bourne can beat Sheamus, then Evan Bourne gets a WWE Title shot at the Rumble? WTF?
MATCH #4: Sheamus vs. Evan Bourne
This match is impromptu, and if Bourne wins, he gets Sheamus at the Rumble for the title. You gotta be f**king kidding me right?
Even though Evan hits his ‘Air Bourne’, it doesn’t take long for Sheamus to win.
YOUR WINNER: Sheamus.
Sorry Evan, no title shot for you.
Cole and King, then talk about the life of ‘Dr. Death’ Steve Williams, who passed away after a long battle with throat cancer. He will be missed.
I’ll be right back.
Return to the misery, in which this is the first RAW I’ve watched in five months. No kidding. A Bret Hart promo video plays, showing the build-up, and the aftermath of the Survivor Series of 1997.
Kofi comes to the ring for his match, as it’s now…
Commercial time!
RAW was watched more than ABC, CW, NBC and FOX last week. Why do I have trouble believing that?
MATCH #5: Kofi Kingston vs. Randy Orton
Kofi in control early, clotheslining Randy over the top, then jumping over the ropes, and nailing Orton on the outside. Randall tries figbhting back, with a DDT in the ring, but that doesn’t work, and Kingston sends him to the outside again. Guess what’s next? Yep, you guessed it.
COMMERCIAL!
We return to find Randy Orton applying the patented Indiana Jones and the Chinlock of Doom! This leads to the momentum being in Randy’s favour. Back to the Chinlock of Doom!, but Kofi gets out of it, and both men are down. Kofi Kingston in control now, as the crowd doesn’t really care much for Kofi. Kingston nails Randall with a cross boyd, but it only brings him two. Kofi counters the RKO, into a fancy looking move, for another near fall.
Kingston looks to finish it with Trouble In Paradise, but Orton counters it into the RKO, and the three count.
YOUR WINNER: Randy Orton
Vince is going to the ring, tune in for it, NEXT!
COMMERCIAL!
Enter McMahon…I have a feeling, this is going to be HUGE!
Vince is trying to get the focus off of Montreal, however, it doesn’t take long for the Hitman to arrive. McMahon seems scared of Bret, as he brings back memories of the past between the two. Vince is trying to kiss Bret’s ass, in order to not get dropped.
Did he just say “I want to bring up your dead”? Anyways, Vince brings a nice gesture, by wanting to put Stu Hart in the WWE Hall Of Fame. Bret accepts, nice touch.
McMahon now thanks Bret for everything he did during his time in the company. Hart shakes McMahon’s hand, and the two stand, arms raised, in the middle of the ring, and just when it looks like things end on a good note, Vinnie Mac gives Bret the ol’ Low Blow, and leaves the ring. Bret stands annoyed in the ring, and that’s all she wrote.
For those who watched that other wrestling show tonight, you sure as hell missed something tonight. Tonight wasn’t about the action. It was about Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels and Vince McMahon. Hart and Michaels buried the hatchet, and Vince just couldn’t bury it. The Road to WrestleMania begins. Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon in Phoenix.
That’s it for RAW! This has been the one they call ‘Legend Killer’.
Hi and welcome to the first edition of Random Randomness for 2010. I hope everybody had a happy and safe New Years holiday. But even though there was holiday There was till a lot going on in the wrestling world. (more…)
World Heavyweight Champion Undertaker vs. Big Show vs. Chris Jericho (Triple Threat Match):
JT: Jericho over Undertaker & Big Show
Drowgoddess: Undertaker wins. Either Jericho or Show will cost the other the win, and they’ll continue to fall apart as a tag team. Taker’s not losing anything at this point.
ThinkSoJoE: I think we all know who’s prying that belt from the cold, dead hands of The Undertaker – and it’s not Chris Jericho or The Big Show. Somebody had a feud over the World Heavyweight Championship with The Undertaker that never had a proper finish, and he just turned heel. Expect ‘Taker to walk out with the gold in tact.
Rey Mysterio vs. Batista
JT: Batista eats Mysterio then gets injured
Drowgoddess: Batista wins. ‘Nuff said.
ThinkSoJoE: I don’t think it’s so much a question of who is going to win, but more of if this match is going to live up to the buildup. Batista made Rey sign a hold-harmless agreement – Since I’m pretty confident The Animal is taking this one, he’d better leave Mysterio half dead in the center of the ring.
Team Kingston (Kofi Kingston, MVP, Mark Henry, R-Truth, & Christian) vs. Team Orton (Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes, Ted DiBiase Jr. , CM Punk, & William Regal) :Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Tag Team Match:
JT: Team Orton over Team Kingston
Drowgoddess: This is a tough call. I really don’t care about the teams as a whole, but I’m a tremendous fan of both Kofi Kingston and CM Punk. I’m essentially chosing between them. I’ll go with Team Kofi to win, as Punk has not been the same since his World title loss to Undertaker. Neither he nor the team of which he is a part will win here.
ThinkSoJoE: Randy Orton’s got a reputation to uphold. He’s been the sole survivor a few times at the Survivor Series, so I’m kind of leaning towards that happening here. Orton will stand alone and still manage to win.
Team Morrison (John Morrison, Matt Hardy, Evan Bourne, Shelton Benjamin, & Finlay) vs. Team Miz (The Miz, Drew McIntyre, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, & Jack Swagger) : Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Tag Team Match
JT: Team Morrison over Team Miz
Drowgoddess: Why is this ppv sounding so much like the “Twilight” movies? Team Edward, Team Jacob, Team This, Team That. At least these guys don’t sparkle in sunlight. With the possible exception of Sheamus. Like anyone’s going to tell him! In any case, despite the level of fandom I have for both Morrison and Bourne, I’m going with Team Miz to win here. Sheamus and McIntyre are absolute BEASTS, Swagger and Ziggler can play the technical game, and The Miz is simply awesome.
ThinkSoJoE: Miz beat Morrison at Bragging Rights – Morrison should get his revenge here. The way I see it, Morrison can pin The Miz here, and then maybe they run into – and eliminate – each other at the Royal Rumble setting up a WrestleMania match. For what it’s worth, I also see Team Miz imploding and costing themselves the match.
WWE Champion John Cena vs. Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels (Triple Threat Match)
JT: Cena over D-X, yeah I said it.
Drowgoddess: *YAWN* I so don’t care. Honestly, I’m not being smarky, I sincerely don’t care the slightest little bit about this match or who wins it. Considering what I predicted in the World title 3-way above, HBK steals a win from underneath HHH, and the DX split takes front and center.
ThinkSoJoE: I’m going to get heat for this, I know it – but Shawn Michaels is the best professional wrestler in the world today. It’s been years since HBK had a title run, and I’d love to see it happen here, but since this match was just randomly thrown together by two guys who turn left for a living and a leprechaun, I’m fully expecting Cena to win.
Team Mickie (Mickie James, Eve Torres, Kelly Kelly, Melina, & Gail Kim) vs. Team Michelle (Michelle McCool, Jillian Hall, Beth Phoenix, Alicia Fox, & Layla) :Traditional Survivor Series Tag Team Elimination Match
JT: F@^& the Divas Match
Drowgoddess: Another yawner for me, since I have no interest in nailing any of these women. I love Beth Phoenix, and she’s so much better than this, but I’m choosing Team Mickie. Mickie, Gail Kim, and, to a lesser extent, Melina, can actually wrestle. Plus, I live for the day that Michelle McCool gets hit by an 18-wheeler hauling toxic waste. Don’t mistake that for heel heat. She’s not that good. It’s “get off my tv and out of my world” heat.
ThinkSoJoE: So wait, let me see if I’ve got this right. Kelly Kelly, Eve Torres, Alicia Fox, and Layla all got into this match, but Natalya, one of the few women on the roster who can actually wrestle, didn’t? Who books this crap? My prediction is half the audience gets up and goes to use the restroom during this one.
Wow it’s been two weeks already, boy does the time fly. But I guess that’s what happens when you are busy. Well I’m back to talk more about random nothing until I take another week off, when that will be I don’t know yet. Well without further ado let’s get this party started: (more…)
Alright. This is going to be a challenge. I’m going to do my best to review RAW, keep up with the twitterverse, and watch my New York Yankees in game 5 of the World Series tonight. Thankfully, I’ve got picture in picture on both of my TVs now, so I can chill in my living room with my laptop and do it all from the comfort of my couch.
Also, I’m pissed off that Ozzy is the host this week. I get stuck with NASCAR dweebs when the Prince of f#$%^ Darkness is hosting this week? Boo! Whatever, let’s go!