Tag Archive: Turnbuckle

  1. Delayed NXT season 2 review for 7/13

    Leave a Comment

    We open with a video package of Nexus.

    To the ring Ashley Valence is in the ring with Matt Striker as they take turns introducing the pros. Morrison is selling his beating by Nexus. Laycool is absent.

    They bring out Nexus, who takes seats on the opposite side of the entrance from the pros. Darren Young is absent due to his beating by John Cena

    Barrett says it’s a privlege to be on the show they got their start on. They wish the rookies all the best. He tells the pros they just want to sit back and enjoy the show.
    (more…)

  2. TNA iMPACT

    Leave a Comment

    Impact opens up with highlights from last week and after the intro we’re going to go straight into the first match this week.

    8-Card Stud Tournament Qualifying Match
    Brutus Magnus vs. Mr. Anderson

    Anderson reminds the fans that the ring is four sided, not 6 sided to get some heat as he does his intro. Footage of Anderson’s big win over Jarrett last week is shown as Anderson makes his way to the ring. Anderson and Brutus lockup and Anderson nails him with a knee to the gut and then lays in a couple of right hands on Brutus. Brutus blocks one of the rights and hits a series of rights of his own. Brutus beats on Anderson in the corner until the referee pulls him off which allows Anderson to hit a dropkick to Brutus’ knee. Anderson stomps on the leg and even the hand of Brutus before hitting an Elbow Drop on the back of Brutus. Anderson whips Brutus hard into the corner and then throws him headfirst into the top turnbuckle before putting the boots to Brutus in the corner. Anderson tries to throw Brutus into the top turnbuckle again but he blocks it and connects with a right hand, but Anderson comes right back with a right of his own and a kick to the gut. Anderson whips Brutus into the ropes and goes for a backdrop but Magnus kicks him in the head and follows it up with a Big Boot. Brutus whips Anderson into the ropes and hits a Back Elbow and then hits a Straightjacket Slam for a nearfall. Brutus goes for the Tormentum but Anderson rakes the eyes of Brutus (the referee was behind Brutus so his vision was blocked) and connects with the Mic Check for the pin!

    Winner: Anderson via pinfall (Mic Check)

    In the parking lot Mick Foley arrives in his beat up ride.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    In the back Christy Hemme is with Angle. She asks him about his Qualifying Match with Tomko tonight, but he says he’s not worried about Tomko right now. He wants to talk about Hulk Hogan, he claims that Hogan is responsible for Syxx and Hall jumping him last week. Hogan says that’s who Hogan is and now he’s showing his true colors, but it ends tonight. He says Hogan should expect a visit from him tonight and he’ll have a really bad attitude.

    At ringside Tenay and Taz hype up the card for tonight which will feature Tara defend the Knockouts Title against Angelina Love, Hernandez & Morgan defend the Tag Titles against 3D, and TNA World Heavyweight Champion AJ Styles going one-on-one with The Pope in a Non Title Match.

    Eric Bischoff’s music hits and Mr. Bischoff makes his way out to the ring alone this week. Bischoff says it is so good to be in Orlando one more time. He says last week Hogan make it clear that Foley has to get on the same page with him but Foley made it clear that he just wasn’t willing to do that, but Foley’s music cuts him off before he can say anything more. Foley walks out to the ring with a serious look on his face. Foley says his reputation in wrestling is that there is something wrong in his head and it’s not because he’s willing to do things to his body that doesn’t seem right, but it’s because he likes just about everybody. He throws out names like Buff Bagwell, Paul Heyman, The Ultimate Warrior, etc. of guys that don’t have great reputations in wrestling yet he still likes. He says that Bischoff is the exception because he hates Bischoff’s guts! He calls Bischoff a ‘slick, little hustler’ and that he is the complete opposite of Foley. He says he loves wrestling and gave everything and would’ve given anything to get into this business while Bischoff came in as salesman and an announcer. Foley calls him the worst announcer in history but Taz says Foley must’ve never heard of Mike Adamle (okay, I about split my sides laughing from that one). Foley says that Bischoff weaseled his way into power in WCW and he says he can’t stand Bischoff. Bischoff says that may be true but this isn’t about him and Foley, it’s about whether Foley is willing to get in line in TNA. Foley says it’s about everyone and he says he loves being apart of TNA, but he always prepares himself for the worst case scenario which is why at 28 he was saving every penny he ever made. He says that’s why he was sleeping at the Red Roof Inn when he was WWF Champion and why he drives a ‘piece of crap minivan’ now. He says he did all that so he wouldn’t have to answer to idiots like Bischoff. He shows the camera two names that he wrote down on his hand (Jeremy Borash and Abyss) and says ‘how dare’ Bischoff mess with these guys lives. Foley puts over everything that Borash does for TNA behind the scenes and says that Bischoff not knowing shows how much little he cares about knowing what makes TNA tick. Bischoff what makes him tick is power and control. He then says since Foley won’t get on the same page with him and he’s going to have to turn that page and write the next chapter of the Mick Foley story. Foley mentions something he said in his book about Bischoff saying that power should be limited to those that are not in love with it. He says Bischoff has not learned a single thing since his failure in WCW. Foley says he was recognizable all around the world while Bischoff made reality shows with Chachi. Foley says with all due respect to his wife that he always told her that deep down wrestling was always his first true love in his life because that it was the first thing he ever loved that loved him back. He says he realized that that love might not last forever but he’ll be damned if he sits back and lets Bischoff have his way with the ‘woman’ he loves. Foley starts to leave the ring but Bischoff stops him and says Foley may want to look at those names on his hand because he still has their futures in the palm of his hands. Bischoff says that new chapter of the Mick Foley Story that he was just talking about starts tonight when Mick Foley faces Kevin Nash in a No DQ Match! He says he is a student of history and Mick has a history with Nash and he wants to see that history resolved.

    In the back Abyss is watching a monitor when JB walks up and he asks JB if he’s going to be okay. JB asks him if it sounds like he’s going to be okay. JB says he worked for Bischoff 10 years ago and nothing has changed. He says when Bischoff is around nobodies okay. JB says he is just there to pick him last check and Abyss freaks out as JB walks off.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Back from commercials Christy Hemme is with Tara in the back. Christy asks Tara about her history with Angelina. Tara says when she first came to TNA Angelina and the Beautiful People made her life hell but since Angelina has came back she seems to be a different person. Tara says Angelina has her eye on the prize but she can’t take it from her and says she’s ready for Angelina.

    TNA World Tag Team Championships
    “Super Mex” Hernandez & “The Blueprint” Matt Morgan (c) vs. Team 3D

    Tenay mentions that if 3D wins then that would make them 24-time Tag Champions. Bubba and Hernandez will start the match off. They lockup and Bubba throws Hernandez into the corner and then they lockup again but this time Hernandez shoves Bubba into the ropes. Hernandez goes for a clothesline but Bubba blocks it and goes for one of his own, but Hernandez blocks his as well. Bubba grabs a side headlock on Hernandez and he shoves Bubba into the ropes and connects with a nasty shoulder block that sends Bubba crashing into the corner! Hernandez follows up with a Corner Splash attempt but Bubba moves and then whips Hernandez into the opposite corner. Bubba charges and hits a Corner Splash of his own. Hernandez kicks Bubba and grabs the top rope and pulls himself up to the top rope showing off that crazy strength and athleticism he possesses. Bubba connects with some nasty chops on Hernandez and then Press Slams him off the top! Bubba drops an elbow on top of Hernandez and gets a nearfall. Bubba tags in Devon and he lays in some elbows on Hernandez until Hernandez connects with a knee to the gut and quickly tags in Morgan. Morgan goes for a clothesline but Devon ducks and connects with a series of rights. Devon attempts to whip Morgan into the ropes but he reverses it only to eat a big Clothesline from Devon followed by a leg drop for a one count. Devon comes off the ropes but Morgan connects with a Discuss Clothesline for a nearfall of his own. Hernandez tags back in and locks a rear chin lock on Devon but Devon breaks it up with back elbows and then comes off the ropes only to eat a big shoulder block for another nearfall. Hernandez lifts Devon up and puts him on the top rope. Hernandez goes up top with him and goes for a Superplex but Devon blocks it and bites the forehead of Hernandez! Devon shoves Hernandez off the top and then hits a Diving Headbutt! Both men are down and they tag out at the same time. Bubba connects with some big jabs on Morgan and then attempts to whip Morgan into the ropes, but Morgan blocks it and attempts a clothesline. Bubba ducks it and goes for a German Suplex but Morgan counters with back elbows. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint but Bubba catches his foot to block it and then connects with the German Suplex! Hernandez comes in but eats a Samoan Drop from Bubba! 3D then hit the Reverse 3D on Morgan! 1…2…NO Hernandez breaks it up! Hernandez connects the forearms on both members of 3D but thy come back with a double shoulder block. Bubba hits a Scoop Slam and then Devon climbs to the top but the Nasty Boys run out and shove Devon off the top as the referee was checking on Hernandez! Hernandez goes for a clothesline on Bubba but he counters into a Bubba Bomb attempt. Hernandez blocks it and shoves Bubba into the Carbon Footprint from Morgan! 1…2…3 and they retain the titles!

    Winners & STILL Tag Champs: Hernandez & Morgan via pinfall (Carbon Footprint)

    The Nasty Boys bring a chair out and are about to lay 3D out further but Hernandez & Morgan come back and run them off. Hernandez and Morgan help 3D up and explain what just happened to them. They fist bump with the champs and walk out.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    “Samoan Submission Machine” Samoa Joe vs. Jesse Neal

    This is the first time we’ve see Neal since Hogan and company has arrived. Tenay reminds us that Joe still has a TNA Title show in the bank. Neal jumps Joe as he comes into the ring but Joe lays him out with a T-Bone Suplex! Joe lays into Neal in the corner with jabs and chops and then he whips Neal into the opposite corner and connects with a Running Back Elbow! Joe then lays Neal out with a Leaping Enziguri! Neal tries to fight back but Joe lays him out with a headbutt. Neal pokes Joe’s eyes and then hits a Running Forearm. Neal climbs up to the top and dives off the top with a Flying Cross Body but Joe just nonchalantly steps aside. Joe connects the some SICKENING open hand strikes and then he whips Neal into the corner and connects with the Flying Knee Strike! Joe puts Neal up top and hits the Muscle Buster and screams “AJ!” as he hits it! 1…2…3!

    Winner: Joe via pinfall (Muscle Buster)

    In the back Christy approaches Hogan and asks him how he feels about what Kurt said earlier. He doesn’t know what Kurt said so Christy tells him. Hogan says this is just another thing that he didn’t do that Kurt is blaming him for. Hogan says that he is easy to find so tell Kurt to come see him. Christy tells Hogan that Kurt said he would be coming for Hogan later and Hogan says he’ll be waiting.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Non Title Match
    “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero vs. “The Phenomenal” AJ Styles w/Ric Flair

    This a first time ever matchup right here! Taz likens Flair and AJ’s relationship to that of a great NFL QB with a legendary coach in his corner. AJ and Pope lockup and Pope gets AJ in a wristlock right off the bat, but AJ quickly forces Dinero into the corner so the referee will have to come in and break it up. AJ connects with a series of chops but Dinero pimp slaps AJ! AJ charges at Pope but he hits a drop toe hold and then floats over into a Front Chancery. Dinero transitions into a wristlock but AJ quickly reverses it and kicks Dinero in the gut. AJ goes for a scoop slam but Dinero blocks it and connects a series of Elbow’s to the top of AJ’s head. Dinero then mocks AJ and Flair and connects with a big right! Dinero whips AJ into the ropes and hits a Backdrop! AJ slides out to the floor to catch a breather and get some advice from Naitch.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Back from commercials Dinero shoves AJ into the ropes but AJ nails him with a shoulder block and then does the Flair strut! AJ comes off the ropes and Dinero goes for a backdrop but AJ blocks it and connects with an elbow and then a chop. AJ whips Dinero into the ropes and leapfrogs him and then connects with the Phenomenal Dropkick! AJ puts the boots to Dinero as he tries to get out of the ring and then catapults Dinero into the bottom rope in a sort of guillotine affect. AJ lights Dinero up with chops in the corner and Dinero answers him back until AJ connects with a big right hand and then he locks in a Camel Clutch on Dinero on the mat! Dinero gets to the ropes and then AJ chokes Dinero on the middle rope. AJ hits a Snap Suplex for a nearfall. AJ mounts Dinero and lays into Dinero with rights and lefts. Dinero comes back with some body shots on AJ and then he attempts to whip AJ into the ropes, but AJ reverses it only to have Dinero hit a Sunset Flip! 1…2…NO AJ kicks out and then connects with a big Running Back Elbow! AJ locks in a rear chin lock on Dinero now but Dinero gets to his feet and breaks it up with back elbows only to have AJ slam Dinero to the mat by his head. AJ puts the boots to Dinero and then measures Dinero for a big right hand, but Pope blocks it and connects with a series of rights and lefts of his own. Dinero ducks another right hand attempt and shows that amateur boxing history with his hand speed connecting with some beautiful body shots on AJ followed by a big right hook! Dinero hits an Atomic Drop and then a Flying Shoulder Block! 1…2…NO AJ kicks out! Pope is starting to get on a roll but AJ cuts him off with a rake of the eyes followed by a Leaping Enziguri! Flair talks trash to Pope from ringside and AJ goes for a Flying Forearm Smash in the corner, but Dinero moves and lights AJ up with a big chop. Dinero goes for the Coronation (Running Body Guillotine as the opponent is draped over the middle rope) but AJ moves out of the way hanging Dinero up in the ropes. AJ grabs Dinero and goes for a Vertical Suplex but Pope blocks it and rolls AJ up with a Small Package out of nowhere! 1…2…3!

    Winner: Dinero via pinfall (small package)

    After the match Dinero doesn’t even have time to celebrate as Flair gets in the ring and attacks him along with AJ! Flair lights Dinero up with chops and rights but Samoa Joe’s music hits and h runs out and makes the save! Joe with some nasty rights on AJ and then Flair turns Joe around and nails him with a chop but it has no affect on Joe! Flair freaks out and begs Joe off and then AJ chop blocks Joe from behind! AJ and Flair now double team Joe until Dinero makes the save for Joe! Joe clotheslines Flair out f the ring t the floor and then Dinero and Joe stomp on AJ until security runs out and holds them back!

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Back from commercials Flair is on the mic on the stage and asks Joe if he wants to die tonight as security is still holding Joe & Dinero back. Flair says Joe should know better and says that this is the new TNA and Joe will get his a** beat! Flair makes fun of Joe about being Samoan and then starts to run away when it looks like Joe is going to break away from security. Joe grabs a mic and screams at Flair to shut his mouth before he stomps the rest of the nature out of his a**! Joe calls AJ a scumbag and Flair says no he’s the World Champion, but Joe tells him to shut his mouth! Joe says he doesn’t care when it was whether they were friends or they hated each other AJ was ALWAYS a warrior! AJ says he gave it all up for a overpriced suit and some wholesale hookers! Joe says he needs to remind AJ how to be a man and a champion and that’s why he is cashing in his title shot at Against All Odds! Joe says from this day until then he will have to go to sleep knowing he has to face the inevitable (pointing at himself) and wake up knowing he has to face the inevitable. Joe tells Pope he thinks they go give Flair & AJ a preview of what the inevitable is! Pope lays security out with some right hands and they chase AJ and Flair to the back!

    In the back Christy is with Angelina. She asks Angelina if she is worried about BP getting involved and she says definitely. She says if she was still in BP she would get involved and says she taught them everything they know but didn’t teach them everything she knows. She says she would’ve never tried to replace Angelina Love because you can’t. Angelina says tonight is about her title shot and says success is the best revenge and she is awesome at revenge.

    In the back Nash is with Eric Young when Bischoff walks in. Bischoff acts like he doesn’t know who Young is and he introduces himself. Bischoff asks Young to leave and then Bischoff sits down with Nash. Bischoff says he needs a favor from Nash. He says he needs Nash to destroy Foley tonight and Nash says he needs him to do him a favor but Pac and Hall still don’t have contracts. Bischoff says they are screwups and they won’t follow the rules. He says he’s sick of that and there is nothing he can do about it. Bischoff says that he can play to that same tune that Pac and Hall play to or he can go out and destroy Foley for him.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Back from commercials footage is shown form 2 months ago when Foley jumped Nash in the Impact Zone after Nash set up the fake meeting between Foley and Nash.

    In the back Christy is with Mick Foley and she asks if Foley is planning on falling in line. Foley says he will face Nash tonight and Foley says he is no longer mad at Nash, but the more he thinks about what Nash did to him the hotter he gets. Abyss walks up still freaking out and he asks Foley if he’ll fall in line. Foley says his job will be safe and Abyss needs to do him a favor and that’s promising him that he will stay away from the ring no matter what happens between Foley and Nash tonight.

    8-Card Stud Tournament Qualifying Match
    Tomko vs. “Olympic Hero” Kurt Angle

    Angle immediately connects with a German Suplex on Tomko but then eats a Big Boot from Tomko! Both men get right to their feet and go nose-to-nose! Angle nails Tomko with a headbutt and then a series of rights and a clothesline that sends Tomko over the top to the floor! Angle follows him out and slams Tomko into the ring steps and rolls Tomko back into the ring. Angle charges at Tomko but eats a Snap Powerslam from Tomko! He whips Angle into the corner and nails him with a running Clothesline and then he grabs Angle and whips Angle into the ring post. Tomko hits a Powerslam for a nearfall and then locks in a Rear Chinlock on Angle. Angle fights to his feet and breaks the hold with back elbows and then comes off the ropes but Tomko grabs him by the throat and hits a Chokeslam. Tomko climbs to the top but Angle quickly gets to the top and hits the Belly-to-Belly Superplex on Tomko! Both guys are down now and finally Angle gets to his feet and hits the Rolling German Suplexes on Tomko! As he went for the third one Tomko blocked it and threw Angle into the corner. Tomko charges but Angle moves and hits the Angle Slam! 1…2…NO Tomko kicks out! Tomko comes out of nowhere with a Lariat! Tomko goes for the Chainsaw Kick but Angle ducks and hit more Rolling German Suplexes! This time Angle goes old school and connects with 5! Angle grabs Tomko’s ankle and locks in the Ankle Lock! Angle drops down to the and great veins the leg which causes Tomko to tap!

    Winner: Angle via submission (Ankle Lock)

    Mr. Anderson, Hernandez, Desmond Wolfe, & Kurt Angle are all now in the Tournament for Against All Odds with 4 more yet to be named.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Footage is shown from TNA’s tour of Europe this past week and then a nice video package highlighting the issues between Foley and Nash from the last few months is shown.

    Nash enters Hogan’s office and he talks about the conversation he had with Bischoff and says he’s down, but he asks for another chance for Pac and Hall. Hogan says they’ve had enough chances and he has done everything he could for them. Nash says now more than ever they need him but Hogan says they’re acting crazier than they ever have now. Hogan says Nash just needs to get away from them but he wants Hogan to keep an open mind about them. Hogan tells Nash not to let them suck him again because ‘you know how they are.’

    A video package is shown highlighting Angelina and the Beautiful People’s past.

    TNA Knockouts Championship
    Tara (c) vs. Angelina Love

    Tara and Angelina lockup and Tara gets the advantage with a side headlock and then she hits a side headlock takeover. Tara holds onto the side headlock as they hit the mat but Angelina is able to roll Tara over and get a one count before Tara rolls back over. Angelina is able to counter out with a head scissors but Tara counters right back by rolling frontwards into a bridging pin for a nearafll. Angelina bridges out of the pin and right into a Backslide! 1…NO Tara kicks out!

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Angelina and Tara are engrossed in a Greco-Roman Knucklelock as we come back from commercials and Angelina is able to lock Tara into Hammerlock and even hit a Hammerlock Armdrag holding onto the Hammerlock on the mat. Angelina puts her knee into the ribs of Tara and then locks in a wristlock but Tara is able to cartwheel out of the move into a wristlock of her own. I do believe we have a wardrobe malfunction here as Tara’s chest is blurred out! How did nobody get a picture of that of all the people that was there live (just asking)? Angelina with a single leg takedown for a nearfall and then she slams Tara headfirst into the top turnbuckle and then she slams her into the opposite turnbuckle. Tara comes back and slams Angelina’s head into the turnbuckle and then whips her into the opposite corner and charges at her, but Angelina is able to lift herself up onto the top rope over the charging Tara and then roll her up! 1…2…NO Tara kicks out! Tara comes back with a kick to the gut and then the Spider’s Web (Fireman’s Carry into Spinning Sidewalk Slam)! 1…2…NO Angelina kicks out! Angelina comes back with a forearm and then she whips Tara into the ropes and goes for the Botox Injection, but Tara ducks and goes for the Widows Peak! Angelina blocks it and counters into a rollup but Tara rolls through and gets the pin!

    Winner & STILL Knockouts Champ: Tara via pinfall

    After the match Angelina and Tara shake hands and Angelina raises Tara’s hand. It actually looked like Angelina tried to tell her about the boobage slipping out but the Beautiful People run out and jump Angelina. They put the boots to Angelina as Tara just watches and finally she lays out BP. Angelina throws some big rights as well as both girls clean house. Velvet is able to escape without Angelina getting her hands on her though.

    In the parking lot Scott Hall & Syxx-Pac are shown sneaking around.

    —COMMERCIAL BREAK—

    Back from commercials Angle walks into Hogan’s office and screams at him to explain to him how Hogan shakes his hand and then 10 seconds later ‘his cronies’ jump him. Hogan says he refused to give Pac (who Hogan refers to as X-Pac) and Hall contracts because they’re thugs and now Angle thinks he hired them to do his dirty work. Hogan says Angle’s temper is the problem here. Angle says he’s worried about Hogan’s agenda and says he doesn’t trust Hogan as far as he can throw him. He says he knows what Hogan is all about and he’s heard all the horror stories about the people he’s done business with. Angle says Hogan needs to understand that he won’t screw with him the way he’s screwed with ‘them’ and he needs to consider this his final warning. Hogan tells Angle he needs to do himself a favor and get out of his office, please. Angle slams his fists on Hogan’s desk and then storms out.

    No DQ Match
    “Big Sexy” Kevin Nash vs. “Hardcore Legend” Mick Foley

    Kevin Nash does his best Raven impersonation by rolling a shopping cart full of weapons out to the ring while Foley brought out his trademark barbed wire baseball bat. Foley swings his bat at Nash who blocks the shots with a garbage can. Finally the trash can is beat up so bad that Nash just flings it at Foley (who knocks it away with the bat) and picks up a chair. Foley swings the bat at Nash more and he blocks it with the chair this time and then he picks up a hockey stick and hits Foley in the legs with it as he charged in with the bat. Nash picks up the barbed wire bat and tries to scrape it on Foley’s face but Foley blocks it and is able to hit a mule kick to Nash’s balls! Foley with a running forearm and now the brawl spills out to the floor where Foley slams Nash into the guardrail and then the ring apron. Foley gets back in the ring and grabs a picture frame but Foley hesitates which allows Nash to nail him with a Big Boot for the pin. That whole thing was VERY sloppy.

    Winner: Nash via pinfall (Big Boot)

    It’s shown that the reason Foley hesitated was because the picture was the stupid picture of him and Borash. We see Hall and Pac coming down through the crowd now! Hall and Pac attack Nash out of nowhere! Pac hits a vision Spinning Heel Kick and then Hall puts the boots to him! What the hell?! Hall turns his attention to Foley and stomps on him while Pac continues to beat on Nash. Hall and Pac taunt the crowd and Nash as everyone wonders what the hell just happened.

  3. Royal Rumble 2010 results

    1 Comment

    Hey folks, ThinkSoJoE here, fresh off of watching the Rumble at my buddy Steve’s house.  We played a little bit of a game – we all tossed in two bucks and picked five numbers.  Whoever had the number of the guy that won won all the money.  That wasn’t me.  Anyhow, we’ve got a lot of Rumbleage to cover, so let’s get to it!

    (more…)

  4. ECW 12/29

    3 Comments

    We’re at the final ECW of the year, and if rumors are to be believed we may be nearing one of the last ECW’s ever. We’ve got more ECW homecoming matches with Matt Hardy and Evan Bourne making their returns.
    (more…)

  5. “iMPACT” Impressions 8/13/09

    Leave a Comment

    Cross the line!

    Match #1: Christy Hemme defeats Sojo Bolt: We open going straight into the match, which is awesome. Christy looks great, and is better in the ring than she has ever been. Not top-of-the-card Knockouts action, by any means, but she certainly didn’t embarrass herself.

    Tenay and West run down tonight’s card, and a split screen shows AJ Styles and Matt Morgan entering the arena.

    Lauren interviews Taz about Samoa Joe’s loss to Hernandez. Taz says that Joe let himself down. Joe beat Joe. Taz will motivate Joe, and turn a negative into a positive. Homicide will be the one to suffer, and Joe will put him out. Solid promo with excellent delivery by Taz.

    Match #2: Hernandez defeats Doug Williams: I still don’t like Hernandez’s new music. Hernandez holds Williams up in a suplex for an eternity before landing a backbreaker over his shoulder. Brutus Magnus distracts Hernandez, and Williams takes control. Williams targets the neck and shoulders. Williams goes to the top turnbuckle, but misses a back senton. Don West is awesome! He says that the TNA fans aren’t the smartest of people, are the chants of “USA! USA!” for the Mexican or the Brit? Williams goes for a top rope cross body, but Hernandez catches him and plants him with a sit-down powerbomb for the win. Brutus magnus attacks hernandez post-match, but Hernandez disposes of him. Rob Terry attacks Hernandez with the “Feast or Fired” briefcase, and knocks him down. The British Invasion bails, and Hernandez gives chase once he regains his footing.

    To the back! Hernandez grabs the mic from Lauren and yells something in Spanich. He leaves.

    To the Mike Tenay sit-down interview! It’s with Bobby Lashley. Tenay says that he has followed every second of Lashley’s WWE career, and that professional wrestling wasn’t enough for him. Way to insult everyone, Mike. Is it possible to be successful in pro wrestling and MMA at the same time? Lashley says that he can. Tenay brings up the Main Event Mafia and Kurt Angle’s desire to be the greatest wrestler ever. Who would win between the greatest wrestler ever and the greatest MMA fighter ever? Lashley says that the fans will.

    Jeremy Borash interviews Dr. Stevie (with a smokin’ hot Daffney) about his bounty on the head of Abyss. Dr. Stevie talks about defeating and destroying “Chris.” Abyss rushes in, grabs Dr. Stevie by the throat, and tells him to finish the job himself. Abyss is attacked by a chair-wielding “Outlaw” Jethro Holiday. For some reason.

    To the back! Lauren interviews Tara, who has Poison crawling over her arm. Tara talks about Awesome Kong, and Lauren talks up the four-way Knockouts match. Tara is in creepy mode, and I likes it.

    Match #3: Eric Young and Sheik Abdul Bashir (w/ Kiyoshi) defeat Rhino and Jesse Neal: Jesse Neal has the same haircut and ring gear that he had for his first match, which is appalling. Neal and Young (Ha! See what I did there?) start out. Rhino tags in and works over Young’s midsection. Neal tags back in. Tenay and West talk up the problems between Neal and Rhino. Young drives Neal into his corner, and Bashir tags in. Bashir tags in Young. Young levels Neal with a clothesline. Tenay and West talk up the “Steel Asylum” match that will take place at “Hard Justice.” The winner will be the Number One Contender to the X-Division title. Alex Shelley, Chris Sabin, Consequences Creed, Jay Lethal, Amazing Red, Suicide, and a debuting “Pope” D’Angelo Dinero (formerly known as Elijah Burke) are in it. Why am I afraid that Dinero/Burke is going to be handed the win and a shot at the X-Division title for his debut match that happens to be on a ppv, and the true X-Division guys will get shoved aside yet again? I hope that I’m wrong. Young and Bashir isolate Neal, and quickly tag each other in and out. Rhino is not happy. Neal has a chance to tag in Rhino, but attacks Bashir instead. Young grabs his trunks and rolls Neal up for the pin. Post-match, Rhino yells at Neal and slaps him. When Neal turns away, Rhino sets up and Gores him. Tenay and West play Rhino up as the face.

    To the back! Lauren interviews Rhino about his treatment of Jesse Neal, actually getting some bass in her voice and challenging Rhino about it. “What do you think this is, the Lifetime Channel?” Awesome! Rhino delivers a strong promo about respecting what Neal has done in the military, but doubting that Neal can handle wrestling.

    Match #4: Tara defeats ODB (w/ Cody Deaner), Angelina Love (w/ Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky), andAwesome Kong (w/ Raisha Saeed): Kong and Tara go after each other, while The Beautiful People bail and hide from Cody Deaner. ODB drinks from her flask, and shares it with Tara. Tara “Hulks up” and smacks her own boobs. ODB climbs to the top and leaps off onto Kong, Raisha Saeed, and Cody Deaner. Tara climbs to the top and leaps off on The Beautiful People. Tara smashes her head on the floor. Kong and Tara fight to the outside. Angelina Love takes out ODB with the Botox Injection bicycle kick. Kong broke up the count. ODB and Kong go. Kong womanhandles ODB, but ODB kicks out twice. Tara and Angelina Love fight outside the ring. Kong chokeslams ODB. Deaner hops up on the apron and screams at Kong. Deaner acts like he wants to fight Kong, but grabs her by the head and kisses her instead. Kong stares at Deaner, then pulls him into the ring and plants him with the Awesome Bomb. Tara runs in and rolls up Kong for the win.

    To the back! Lauren talks to AJ Styles about his upcoming match against Matt Morgan. With the “Best of Three” series tied at one win each, AJ’s loss will put Sting at a huge disadvantage.

    To the back! Jeremy Borash talks with Team 3D. I hate that Brother Devon talks respectfully about Booker T and Scott Steiner. More kissing up to Harlem Heat and the Steiner Brothers, neither of which are current teams. Talking up the Team 3D versus Booker T and Scott Steiner tag team title match.

    Match #5: Scott Steiner (w/ Booker T and Sharmell) defeats Brother Ray (w/ Brother Devon): This was a “No DQ” match. Steiner gets the mic and blah blah blah. Brother Ray takes a mic and kisses up to Harlem Heat and the Steiner Brothers, before pointing out that garbage is also a household name, and, like them, it’s getting old and stinking. Slow, plodding, power game. Sharmell and Booker interfere. Ray takes Steiner’s chain mail headdress and puts it on. The British Invasion come down and distract, allowing Booker and Steiner to put Ray through a table and get the win. This was barely a match, and far too short for this sort of thing. With interference almost right away, it was pointless.

    To the contract signing! Mike Tenay oversees as Mick Foley and Kevin Nash sign contracts for the Legends title match on Sunday at teh “Hard Justice” ppv. Both guys have final pre-match comments. Foley says that he doesn’t think that he’s ever had a conversation with Nash that didn’t revolve around money. Doesn’t a sense of pride or accomplishment meananything to Nash? Nash tells Foley that he could have made $20,000 at the past weekend’s authograph session, which he thinks that Foley cost him. Why doesn’t Foley take the easy way out, like Nash always has? Foley says that Nash may look down on him, but he loves wrestling with the sort of passion that would allow him to do it for free. Nash strips down and calls himself an athlete and a businessman, while Foley is a pathetic wrestler. Foley says that he’ll bring his set of skills on Sunday, and Nash can bring his, and they’ll see what happens. Foley says that they’re on a wrestling show, in a wrestling ring, with a title contract for a wrestling match, and nobody’s going through that table? Nash says that he doesn’t get paid for that, so he won’t go through it or put Mick through it for free. Mick says that he would put Nash through the table for free, and then announces that he thinks that he will go through the table for free. Foley runs off the ropes and hurls himself through the table. People cheer.

    To the video package for the “Steel Asylum” match!

    To the back! Lauren interviews Matt Morgan. Morgan feels no pressure, and is completely confident that he will win. He guarantees victory, in fact.

    Match #6: Matt Morgan (w/ Kurt Angle) defeats AJ Styles (w/ Sting): This was the rubber match to determine the third man in the three-way dance at “Hard Justice” for the World Heavyweight title. AJ takes the match to Morgan by running the ropes and landing a flip dive over the top rope. AJ and Morgan fight on the floor, and AJ takes Morgan down with a flying forearm. Morgan is finally rolled into the ring and the bell rings to start the match. AJ puts Morgan in the Figure Four leg lock for a long time. Morgan screams, but won’t tap. Morganmakes it to the ropes, and AJ breaks the hold. Morgan gets his wind back, and uses his power against AJ. Morgan dominates AJ. Don West says that Angle has announced that this is Morgan’s last test for MEM membership. If Morgan wins this match, and helps him retain the title, he’ll be in. AJ kicks out several times, but Morgan continues to toy with him, and won’t allow AJ a chance to get in any offense. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint in the corner, but AJ dodges and lands a few punches. AJ hits a missile dropkick, but Morgan kicks out at two. Morgan catches AJ in a side slam, but AJ kicks out at two. AJ hits a Pele out of nowhere, but Morgan kicks out just in time. Morgan takes AJ’s head off with a Carbon Footprint, and gets the pin. Matt Morgan, Kurt Angle, and Sting will fight in the “Hard Justice” main event. Post-match, the entire MEM comes to the ring, applauding. Angle gets a mic.

    Angle praises Morgan, and claims that the MEM was scouting him to recruit him all along. Morgan says that he thought that he was selling himself to the MEM, not the other way around. Angle says that Morgan has one last little thing to do before getting in to the MEM. Morgan says that Angle can’t possibly be asking him to help Angle retain the title. Angle says that he’s not asking it, he’s demanding it. Morgan calls Angle “little man,” and tells him that no one demands anything of “The Blueprint.” He isn’t passing up this opportunity, and he will be walking out of the match as the new World Heavyweight Champion. Angle is furious, and has to be restrained by the MEM as Morgan exits up the ramp. Morgan’s face turn is here.

     

    “Hard Justice” Predictions:

    Bounty Match: Abyss vs. Jethro Holiday

    Abyss needs the win here.

     

    Winner gets World Heavyweight title shot from the “Feast or Fired” briefcase: Hernandez vs. Big Rob Terry

    Hernandez has got to get the win here.

     

    New Japan IWGP Tag Team Championship match:  The British Invasion (champs) vs. Beer Money

    The British Invasion retains, if only because New Japan already issued one statement (later retracted) that they didn’t recognize the title change, and it can’t possibly happen again.

     

    “Steel Asylum” match (winner is #1 Contender for the X-Division title): Alex Shelley vs. Chris Sabin vs. Jay Lethal vs. Consequences Creed vs. Daniels vs. Suicide vs. Amazing Red

    If there were a god, Chris Sabin would win. That being said, Jay Lethal won the last one. I’m picking Daniels to win. This is all null and void if Don West was right, and Elijah Burke debuts as “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero in this match. If he does, you can just hand him the win, as that’s the track record here. 

     

    Knockouts Championship title match: Angelina Love (w/ Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky) vs. ODB (w/ Cody Deaner)

    Angelina retains. Please.

     

    X-Division title match: Homicide vs. Samoa Joe (w/ Taz)

    Homicide retains. He hasn’t had the title long, and there’s been no focus on it since he won it. He shouldn’t lose it yet.

     

    Tag Team Championship match: Booker T and Scott Steiner (champs) vs. Team 3D

    Team 3D should win here. I doubt that they will, but they should.

     

    Legends Championship match: Mick Foley (champ) vs. Kevin Nash

    Foley retains. Why let him win it if he’s going to lose it right away?

     

    World Heavyweight title match: Kurt Angle (champ) vs. Matt Morgan vs. Sting

    Angle retains. It’s Angle, duh.

     

    That’s it for the real-time. Check back Sunday for a review of “Hard Justice!”

    Peace out,

    Drowgoddess