Power Poll for the Week Ending 03/16/11
Leave a CommentWhen you’re on the road to WrestleMania, things are going to get shaken up on a weekly basis. And it should come as no surprise that this is what indeed happened this week.
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When you’re on the road to WrestleMania, things are going to get shaken up on a weekly basis. And it should come as no surprise that this is what indeed happened this week.
(more…)
We’re hot off the heels of the biggest Royal Rumble match in history, and tonight will see Alberto Del Rio’s victory celebrations continue… but you already knew that, right?
Hey! That’s right, something before RAW?! Yeah. I decided at the beginning of the Royal Rumble match to do a real quick rundown of the Royal Rumble. This is not going to be anywhere near as long as the usual RAW Reviews, and it’s not going to be as detailed. The backstage segments may be out of order, but I barely paid attention to them…
Edge vs Dolph Ziggler with Vickie Guerrero for the World Heavyweight Championship
So Edge comes out, we’re reminded that he can’t use the Spear or he loses the Championship, and then Vickie comes out, reminds us, and introduces Dolph. The match goes on for a while and was a pretty decent match. I didn’t expect it to be, but it turned out to be. Vickie got on the apron and slapped Edge, but Kelly Kelly, of all fuckin people, came out and took her out. Dolph locked in a sleeper, and during Edge’s wild flailing to get out of it, he slapped the ref, and knocked him down. So, Edge hit a quick Spear when no one was looking (except the whole audience), and then locked in the Killswitch (or the Unprettier) for the win.
World Heavyweight Champion Edge wins via pinfall.
There’s a small segment backstage with WWE Champion The Miz saying that he’ll win, and Riley backs him up.
The Miz with Alex Riley vs Randy Orton for the WWE Championship
Randy gets an early advantage, but Riley interferes and Miz gets it. Match was pretty decent, with Riley interfering a good amount, and The Miz about to walk out before Randy stopped that idea with a harsh clothesline. It ended, surprisingly, with Nexus coming out to stand by the ring. Riley came in to try to get Randy, but was thrown out onto Nexus and the ref, and then Punk came up from underneath the ring and hit the Go To Sleep on Orton, and dragged Miz over for the cover.
WWE Champion The Miz wins via pinfall.
Gail Kim was backstage with Daniel Bryan. Bellas faked an apology and then attacked.
Natalya vs LayCool in a Two-on-One Handicap Match for the WWE Diva’s Championship
Before the match can get started, the RAW GM says that he’s gotten enough emails about Cole being annoying (“That’s just a joke!”), and won’t get more about LayCool, so this is now a Fatal Four Way. NO! IT WASN’T AWESOME KONG’S DEBUT, OR EVEN BETH! IT WAS!!!!!!!
Natalya vs Layla vs Michelle McCool vs Eve Torres for the WWE Diva’s Championship
You read that right. Anyway, the match was alright, kind of, and then Eve pinned Layla as McCool pinned Natalya. However, ref was looking at Eve and Layla.
WWE Diva’s Champion Eve Torres wins via pinfall.
Michelle was pissed.
Then, the Royal Rumble match (and there was a thing at some point about how “Dashing” Cody Rhodes had an official statement about his not making it, thanks to Rey’s knee brace breaking his face nose.) started.
ENTRANT NUMBER – ENTRANT – ELIMINATED BY
1) CM Punk
I have to stop here. Punk came out, and then the Corre’s music hit, and then the Corre surrounded Punk, and then the New Nexus came in and it was a mini-brawl. Essentially, the RAW GM told them that this was not how the Royal Rumble match was going to start and sent them all (minus Punk) back to the back to wait their turns.
1) CM Punk – John Cena
2) United States Champion Daniel Bryan – David Otunga
3) Justin Gabriel – Daniel Bryan
4) Zack Ryder – Daniel Bryan
5) William Regal – Ted DiBiase
6) Ted DiBiase (with Maryse) – Nexus
7) John Morrison – Nexus
8) Yoshi Tatsu – Mark Henry
9) Husky Harris – The Great Khali
10) Chavo Guerrero – Mark Henry
11) Mark Henry – Nexus
12) JTG – Michael McGuillicutty
13) Michael McGuillicutty – John Cena
14) Chris Masters – Nexus
15) David Otunga – John Cena
16) Tyler Reks – Nexus
17) Vladimir Kozlov – Punk
18) R-Truth – Punk
19) The Great Khali – Mason Ryan
20) Mason Ryan – John Cena
21) Booker T – Mason Ryan
22) John Cena – The Miz
23) Hornswoggle – Sheamus
24) Tyson Kidd – John Cena
25) Heath Slater – John Cena
26) Kofi Kingston – Randy Orton
27) Jack Swagger – Rey Mysterio
28) Sheamus – Randy Orton
29) Rey Mysterio – Wade Barrett
30) Wade Barrett – Randy Orton
31) Dolph Ziggler – The Big Show
32) Diesel – Wade Barrett
33) Drew McIntyre – The Big Show
34) Alex Riley – John Cena
35) The Big Show – Ezekiel Jackson
36) Ezekiel Jackson – Kane
37) Santino Marella – Alberto del Rio
38) Alberto del Rio – WINNER
39) Randy Orton – Alberto del Rio
40) Kane – Rey Mysterio
There were a lot of hijinks in the ring during the match. The Miz ran into the ring, after sitting commentary since Alex Riley entered the Rumble, and eliminated Cena after Cena eliminated Riley. Hornswoggle copied a lot of moves, and a lot of the people lasted longer than they may have seemed to. It wasn’t a hugely, wildly spectacular match, but it was alright.
See ya tomorrow night for Monday Night RAW!
Well it’s Friday night and my cable is out and since it hasn’t stopped snowing since the end of November here and since I have an extremely busy day tomorrow, I figured I’d give you this weeks article so here it is:
It happened on WWE’s NXT program of all places. This FORCED me to rewind while having it on in the background…
I’m not reviewing the whole show. What I am posting is a superb free-TV match of the new year thus far. It was a solid actual wrestling match. Yes. Like I just wrote… on NXT. We don’t even have a category for that show ’round these parts, fella.
Note: none of the following involves Sheamus, unless you count the Royal Rumble highlight video promoting this weekend’s PPV.
As I wonder if the cold and snow will ever end here (were probably gonna break a record this year) I sit and realize, wait this weekend both the AFC and NFC champions will be crowned. I’ll have my picks later on in this article here’a a hint and possibly another here (sorry I just had to). But hey I think there may be some wrestling to talk about: (more…)
Hello everyone! Tonight is that special night once a year where Superstars and Divas – and now Guest Hosts/Stars? – are given that award that they all hope to attain! A championship?! Don’t be silly!! The Slammy for… Whatever Category They’re Nominated In!! And, because someone, somewhere loves me, here are the categories and nominees!
As well as these categories, there’s also Diva of the Year and Superstar of the Year! But, alongside the Slammys tonight, we also have to find out what Wade Barrett’s decision is concerning Nexus. Will he rehire John Cena, or will he be outcast from the Nexus?
However, before RAW went on the air, the following Superstars won the following awards:
Best Performance By a Winged Specimen RAW Chicken
Best Use of Exercise Equipment Rosa Mendes – Shake Weight
Most Menacing Haircut Tyler Reks
Best Family Values Kane destroying Swagger Sr. as Jack Swagger looks on
Superstar/Diva Most in Need of Makeup Sheamus
The “Cole in Your Stocking Award” Daniel Bryan attacking Michael Cole on NXT
Outstanding Achievement in Baby Oil Application “Dashing” Cody Rhodes
Frequent Tweeter Award Goldust
Best WWE.Com Exclusive Show WWE NXT <-Because this needed a category…
Most Annoying Catchphrase Zack Ryder’s Woo Woo Woo, You Know It
David Arquette is introduced, and says that there’s no one better to kick of the Slammy Awards than him. Arquette says that he beat Eric Bischoff, and then says that he should have won an Oscar for his role in “Ready to Rumble”. The first category of the Slammys is the Shocker of the Year! Is it The Miz cashing in on Orton? The Nexus debuting? Paul Bearer’s turn against the Undertaker? Or, will it be Randy Orton punting Chris Jericho in the skull?
Wade Barrett comes out and says nothing for a few minutes. Then, he speaks and says he accepts it on behalf of the Nexus. Of course, the Nexus wouldn’t be there if it wasn’t for him. If he wouldn’t have won NXT Season One and brought them with him, then they wouldn’t have become the most powerful group in the history of the WWE. And speaking of power, he is the one man with the power to rehire John Cena. Of course, the other members of Nexus have informed him that if he fails to rehire Cena, he’ll be excommunicated from the group. That is, of course, the group he created. He hasn’t made up his mind yet, but he will be making his decision before the night is over. In the mean time, everyone can rest assured that Barrett will be creating many more shocking moments in the WWE.
“Mr. Barrett, I’m going to give you the opportunity to give us yet another shocking moment in a match right now against this man.”
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell, it’s a Big Show!
Wade Barrett vs The Big Show
Big Show took Wade’s Slammy, and Barrett looks upset. Punk says that Show thinks there is chocolate under the Slammy, which is why he took it.
Show goes for Barrett, but Barrett ducks under the rope. And then again. Barrett then slides out of the ring and walks around it. The ref starts counting. Barrett gets back in the ring at nine. Show then fakes a hit and kicks Barrett on the stomach, then smacks him hard in the chest. Show then goes to do it again, but Barrett pokes Show in the eye. Barrett takes advantage and attacks the legs. Show misses with a right hand, and Barrett continues to attack his legs. The crowd has a Cena chant going, and Show swats Barrett away from him. Barrett gets show on one knee, but Show gets up and is pissed, throwing Barrett all over the ring, and then out of it. Show climbs out and smacks Barrett again. Barrett is thrown back in the ring, and Show makes his way in as well. Barrett rolls back out and grabs his Slammy. Then, he proceeds to walk out of the match.
Big Show wins by count out.
The Superstar of the Year Nominees are Rey Mysterio, Randy Orton, Edge, John Cena, World Heavyweight Champion Kane, and WWE Champion The Miz.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi ‘It’s not fair! It’s not fair!’ Bitch, this is professional wrestling, not dodgeball. #BWF #RAW
@TKeep123 did I just see ANGRY MIZ girl in the crowd??? #WWE #RAW #Slammies
Oh God. And again, the Diva of the Year will be determined in a battle royal… again.
Kelly Kelly’s presenting Despicable Me Slammy of the Year with Tyson Kidd and Jackson Andrews, or whatever his name was.
God, it’s been so long since I’ve had to listen to Kelly Kelly talk, and she still sounds disgustingly stupid. And I agree with Tyson as he congratulates her for using more big words right now than ever in her life. I like Tyson now. The nominees are: Drew McIntyre humiliating Teddy Long (I want this one, just for Drew to talk to me), Kane burying the Undertaker alive, Mr. McMahon turning on Bret Hart after seeming to accept him, or CM Punk singing happy birthday to Rey Mysterio’s daughter.
CM PUNK!
The crowd doesn’t seem to know whether to cheer or boo him.
Punk says this just goes to prove that if you work hard and believe in yourself, you’ll make all your dreams come true. People ask him why he did it, and he did what he did because Rey wronged Punk, and when people wrong him, he gets even. Right now, there’s another individual who has wronged him, and he’s going to talk specifically to this person, so he wants them to watch their back, because he will get even. And if you think what he did to Rey and his family was despicable, you haven’t seen anything yet.
Kofi comes out, and Punk says that it’s his moment.
<COMMERCIAL>
@WWEsAngel_Nef LMAO @ CM Punk #wwe #slammys Punk is fkn gold man!
@kickoutblog Quite convenient that the Despicable Me award is one day before the movie comes out on DVD.
@xescapeartists Did Tyson just make fun of Kelly Kelly? OMG TYSON. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. And Kelly, you suck on the microphone. kthnks.
@redsandman99 And the Bellas STILL think Daniel Bryan is the guest host!
Kofi Kingston and United States Champion Daniel Bryan vs. Intercontinental Champion Dolph Ziggler and Ted DiBiase with Maryse
Daniel and Dolph start out, Ziggler with Bryan in a headlock. Bryan fights out with elbows, but Ziggler takes him down, only for Bryan to kick out of the cover. Ziggler tags in DiBiase, who holds Bryan against the ropes, distracting the ref while Ziggler delivers a cheap shot. DiBiase goes for two covers in a row, but Bryan kicked out. DiBiase tags in Ziggler, who runs right in and goes for a cover, only for Bryan to kick off. Ziggler tags in DiBiase again, and kicks Bryan in the stomach. DiBiase goes for another cover, but Bryan kicks out at two. DiBiase gets Bryan in a headlock, and Bryan kicks out, ducking two clotheslines, and then both men running into one another in a cross body. DiBiase rolled right out of the ring, and Bryan tags in Kingston. Ziggler comes in, only to get a bunch of kicks to the face. Kingston Boom Drops Ziggler and then calls for the Trouble in Paradise, which connects. Kingston goes for the cover and DiBiase just barely misses breaking the cover before the ref smacks the mat in three.
Kofi Kingston and the United States Champion Daniel Bryan win via pinfall.
Later to come, Sheamus and John Morrison meet one on one.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog But speaking of Despicable Me… IT’S SO FLUFFY!
@Niki_Sushi Vickie, Bellas, Daniel, Kofi…this could only get worse if Truth came out. #BWF #RAW
@WWEsAngel_Nef I love how everyone has a woman at ringside except Kofi. Maybe he should ask DB if he can borrow a Bella Theres enough 2 go around #bwf #wwe
Santino Marella and Vladimir Kozlov are going to present Guest Star Shining Moment of the Year! Santino says that once again RAW was host to top performers in sports and entertainment. Santino says that Kozlov was humiliated by the cast of MacGruber, and then Kozlov says the time that he destroyed Santino. Santino apologizes, kisses his cheeks, and then steps away from an angry looking Kozlov. The Nominees are Mike Tyson for punching out Chris Jericho, Pee Wee Herman vs The Miz, Wayne Brady getting an RKO, or William Shatner singing Superstar Entrance Themes.
Via satellite, Pee Wee says he just received word that he won. He’s never won anything like that before and he’s overwhelmed, and he’d like to thank The Miz, Big Show (AKA Big Pee Wee), and he’s ready to come back anytime, and it’s incredible, and he’s going to burst, and thank you, and all that good stuff.
Backstage, Barrett puts his Slammy up and is confronted by Nexus. Otunga says they want his decision. If he doesn’t hire Cena back, Nexus will be just fine, but Otunga can’t say the same thing for Barrett. Taking that beating from Show didn’t look too promising for Barrett’s singles career. Barrett thanks Otunga for opening his eyes and says he knows exactly what he has to do.
<COMMERCIAL>
@JoeyStyles William Shatner was robbed of a Slammy
@WWEsAngel_Nef WILLIAM SHATNER WAS ROBBED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #WWE #bwf #Slammys
@RingsideRants That crowd could not care less about Pee Wee Herman.
@Niki_Sushi Johnny Knoxville should win, just for knocking Ted on his ass. I’m just saying. #BWF #RAW
Mark Henry vs. “Dashing” Cody Rhodes
Rhodes can’t even get his jacket out of the ring before Henry runs after him. Henry goes after Rhodes, and Rhodes ducks under the ropes. Rhodes ducks a clothesline, and then is thrown across the ring, and then is hit with a clothesline. Henry then screws with Rhodes’ face, and Rhodes goes Hulk on him. Rhodes rips Henry and then jumps all over him, literally, and then puts him in a headlock. Henry refuses to submit, and manages to get up to his feet. Rhodes goes to kick him, but Henry pushes him back and then clotheslines him a few times. Rhodes thrown into the corner, and then gets Henry’s giant ass in his stomach. Henry goes to do it again and Rhodes hits Beautiful Disaster, then takes him down. Rhodes then jumps off the top rope and plants his knee in Henry’s spine for the win.
“Dashing” Cody Rhodes wins via pinfall.
Next up is the Holy %&^*%&* Move of the Year.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi I really… really… want some kool-aid right now. HE’S DANCING MY FACE, DAMMIT! >:O #BWF #RAW
@seraphalexiel At this point, I’m positive that a win over Mark Henry should no longer be considered an upset victory
Jerry “The King” Lawler is presenting us with the next award!… along with Vickie Guerrero. Don’t worry, King, you aren’t the only one upset. King says he’s glad to see Vickie and he’s lucky to be there, because he was up all night with his pet lizard who had reptile dysfunction. I laughed. Vickie says Holy…. Is the exact reaction she had when Cole caused Jerry the WWE Championship. King says that that’s probably the reaction Ziggler has when she models lingerie, or goes into the restaurant and says she’ll take it when given the menu. Vickie says she’s lost weight, and Jerry says to look around, and she’ll find it.
Nominees! Morrison jumps off the set onto Daniel Bryan and The Miz, Kingston leg drops Drew off a ladder through the announce table, Cena AA’s Batista through the stage, and Randy RKO’s Evan in midair.
John Cena! King says hold up, because Cena is fired and can’t be there, so they’re going to accept it.
Barrett comes out and says that he’ll take that. If Cena wants it, he can come and get it. The whole world is hanging on Barrett’s every word, because he’s about to decide whether or not to rehire John Cena. Barrett says his decision is… … … … Barrett says that he’s not going to make his decision unless John Cena comes down to the ring and faces him. The crowd starts screaming and Barrett’s eyes dart around to try to find Cena. Cena hugs a bunch of people and high fives people and makes his way to the ring. Barrett tells him to keep his distance, and that if Cena attacks him now, his decision will be obvious. Barrett says that he’s thought long and hard about this decision, and it affects a lot of people: Cena, Barrett, and the Nexus. The Nexus comes out, but John doesn’t seem scared. Nexus surrounds the ring again. All these long pauses of silence are getting on my nerves. Barrett says that Cena is officially rehired… on two conditions: 1) Cena agrees to face Barrett this Sunday at TLC in a chair match, which Cena agrees to. 2) Cena gives the whole world what they’ve been waiting to see: Tonight, he goes one-on-one with David Otunga. Otunga looks shocked, but Cena laughs and agrees to that too. Barrett says he wants to show Cena exactly why he wanted to rehire him. And Nexus climbs up on the apron, and Cena fights, and Nexus gangs up on him. Barrett slides in the ring with a steel chair, and smacks Cena with it when he goes to get up. Then again. Barrett and Nexus leave the ring. Welcome back, Cena.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi Slipped that carpet right out from under Mr. Orange Face, now didn’t he? #BWF #RAW
@TKeep123 “Paging Wade Barrett…paging Wade Barrett….you can claim your testicles at the ticket office. ” #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
Next week is WWE Week on USA! Monday night at 9 is RAW, Tuesday night at 9 is Smackdown, LIVE, and Tribute to the Troops is Wednesday at 8!!
David Arquette is back, with a change of clothes, to say something: he’s opening a theater at the historic Roosevelt Hotel in Hollywood. They’ll be debuting on Valentine’s Day 2011. He wants to introduce the WWE Universe Fan Reaction of the Year. This encapsulates what makes the WWE Universe so great. Nominees: Weird Kid Reacting to Cena joining Nexus. Loser Crying when Shawn Michaels’ career ended at Wrestlemania, some Kid, and then the Angry Miz Girl.
I officially hate her. She thanks her dad and her sister, and-
AWESOME
I really hate her right now.
Miz kneels in front of her, to a rather unimpressed face, and asks if she remembers him. He says she looks so pretty, and compliments her Slammy. He asks if he can take a look at her Slammy, and the girl looks half dead. He says that he should take it for safe-keeping, and then asks if she can do him a favor: show him the face, and then mocks her for the face. He makes Riley hold it, and says that he deserves a Slammy, not a nine-year-old girl. Nobody’s worked harder than him. He’s held the United States, Unified Tag Team, Money in the Bank, and WWE Championships. That’s called a Grand Slam. He finds it amazing that tonight is the Slammys when there are still three weeks left in the year, because if you want a moment of the year, tune in this Sunday to TLC where he’ll beat Orton so bad, Orton will beg him to put him through a table. He’ll prove why Miz is the reason they’re here tonight-
“I decided that six days before your tables match at TLC, both you and Randy Orton are going to face former champions tonight. And Miz, your match against a former World Champion, begins right now.”
WWE Champion The Miz vs Rey Mysterio
Miz and Rey go to lock up, but Miz kicks Rey, then beats him into the corner. Miz then whips Rey across the ring, but Rey throws him out of the ring, and then sentons him outside the ring.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi It’s like taking a Slammy from a very angry 9 year old girl who would love nothing more than to beat you to death with it. #BWF #RAW
@kickoutblog Did Miz just steal Miz Girl’s Slammy?! Hilarious.
@HitTheRopes Where’s Kalee’s dad? Just for realism, dad should have gotten in Miz’s face. #wwe
@TKeep123 ANGRY MIZ GIRL…..LIVE!!! ….and she WINS!! …and she still ain’t happy! #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
@AngryGirlWWE I WIN! I WIN!!!!! #angrygirlwwe
@RingsideRants Miz Girl is a better actress than Dixie Carter.
We come back to Rey fighting and throwing Miz across the ring. Miz went to counter one of Rey’s moves, but Rey countered that one. Rey shoves Miz into the ropes and gets ready for the 619, but Alberto Del Rio interrupts, and Miz climbs out of the ring. Rey slides out of the ring, but gets face planted into the apron by Miz. Miz throws him back in and goes for a cover, but Rey kicks out at two. Miz dominates Rey, putting him up on the top rope, and climbing up after him. Miz sets up a suplex, but Rey throws him off and hits a seated senton, then flies into a lateral press on Miz. Miz shoves Rey back and then kicks him in the stomach. Rey kicks him in the head and Miz kicks out of the pin. Miz goes to hit him, but Rey gets a drop toe hold on Miz and goes for the 619, but Alberto is on the apron and distracts him. Rey set s up again, but Riley distracts the ref and Alberto takes Rey down. Miz sneaks up a cover.
WWE Champion The Miz wins via pinfall.
Rey chases Alberto Del Rio down the ramp.
“As I said earlier, both The Miz and Randy Orton will face former champions tonight. Miz just faced Rey Mysterio and later tonight, Randy Orton will compete in a handicapped match against Alex Riley and his partner, former WCW World Heavyweight Champion, David Arquette.”
Well, way to give a match to Randy. Because legitimately building up momentum is overrated.
Still to come, the Diva Clusterfuck Battle Royal for the Diva of the Year Slammy. And John Morrison and Sheamus have yet another match next.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog Miz Girl should do a run-in and cost Miz the match.
@TKeep123 Is it wrong I’m looking forward to the Cross-brand DIVA Battle Royal? …Ok, and hoping for wardrobe malfunction? #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
Edge is here to give out the Slammy for the Oh SNAP! Meltdown of the Year, a category he is nominated for. He says that it’s an honor to be out there tonight to present the Slammy and he’s pretty sure Kane was supposed to be his co-presenter tonight because he’s probably having a Meltdown of his own right now. Right now, Edge needs a co-presenter, one he’s comfortable with, one that he knows well and has had chemistry with…
If you close your eyes you’ll find naked truth revealed…
I marked out right here. I really did. Edge asks how his pec is and Christian says it’s fine. Christian says that he hopes Del Rio wins, because he and his Peeps haven’t forgotten what happened. The nominees are: Show destroying Swagger’s trophies, Alberto del Rio freaking out all over Rey Mysterio, Edge destroying the RAW General Manager’s laptop (“You’ve got the crazy eyes!”), or Batista quitting the WWE.
Edge!!
Edge says that he appreciates the Slammy, but for Meltdown of the Year? He doesn’t get it. He’s always been calm and rational, but sure he may have lost his cool a few times because of a RAW General Manager who hides behind a computer, and has no guts and Christian tries to stop Edge. Christian’s phone goes off and he says that he’s just received an email… nah, just kidding. He is the RAW General Manager.
Sunday, Edge will be the World Heavyweight Champion, but after all these years one thing has remained the same: Michael Cole is still a massive tool.
King Sheamus vs John Morrison
Sheamus shoves Morrison right into the corner, then slaps him hard, and then proceeds to just beat the hell out of Morrison. Morrison then beats the crap out of Sheamus. Sheamus goes right through the damn ref to get to Morrison, then Morrison gets the momentum… I don’t even know.
Nobody wins due to double count out.
More refs come out to try to get them apart, but the two of them are vowing death to the other, but still.
“Sheamus, Morrison, it’s obvious this issue of yours isn’t going to be resolved tonight, so I’ve decided to raise the stakes. Not only will the two of you will compete at TLC Sunday, but the winner will become the next Number One Contender to the WWE Championship. The winner will be the man who gets the contract that is suspended above the ring. That’s right, the two of you will compete in a Number One Contender’s Ladder Match.”
Sheamus yells at Cole, then grabs a ladder. He then slams it into Morrison, who walked right the hell into it, and then climbs in the right to further beat the hell out of Morrison, and throws him out of the ring, into the ladder.
Still to come, Randy will face Riley and Arquette, Cena and Otunga will face up.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi How do you win an award for beating up a computer? How do you win an award for puking on someone? The same way, akshully. #BWF #RAW
@seraphalexiel Honestly, I would have preferred if Del Rio and Mysterio got the ladder match
@RingsideRants Oh damn…. a potential Morrison-Miz title program in the works??
@kickoutblog Christian > Edge. Always
@WWEsAngel_Nef Why yes. Yes you are a tool Michael Cole. Edge is ftfw! #WWE #bwf #Slammys
@TKeep123 Christian get’s a Anonymous GM message on his iPhone … ok, just kidding! #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
@HitTheRopes Damn, that sh*t had to hurt! #Sheamus #Morrison #wwe
Presenting the Slammy for Knucklehead Moment of the Year is… JTG and William Regal? SERIOUSLY?! I love Regal, but seriously? With JTG? Regal at least just shakes his head at JTG.
Nominees: Show unmasks a bald CM Punk, Mae Young PWNS Lay-Cool, Beth Phoenix eliminates Khali via… kiss?!, and Santino Marella is out-danced by… Vladimir Kozlov?!
Mae Young beating LayCool… But Lay Cool is totally here. God. Layla says she’d thank Mae Young, but they don’t get basic cable at the nursing home, and the award is Flawless.
<COMMERCIAL>
@HitTheRopes JTG screws up the announcement. #ReadingReadingYeahYeah
@WWEsAngel_Nef You know JTG needs to fire that gimmick and be more Regal ish. #bwf #WWE #Slammys
@kickoutblog A battle royal to determine Diva of the Year? Doesn’t that just determine the Diva of December 13th?
Diva Clusterfuck Battle Royal to determine Diva of the Year
Layla, Michelle McCool, Kelly Kelly, Alicia Fox, Beth Phoenix, Maryse, Brie and Nikki Bella, Melina, Eve Torres, Diva’s Champion Natalya, Gail Kim, Kaitlyn, and Tamina? Anyway, Kaitlyn and Rosa are eliminated first, Tamina, Bella Whore 1, Eve Torres, Bella Whore 2, Maryse, Kelly Kelly, Melina (after a Glam Slam into the ropes), Layla, Beth Phoenix, Gail, Alicia Fox, and Diva’s Champion Natalya.
Michelle McCool wins.
“Celebrate all you want tonight, ladies, but this Sunday may be a different story. At TLC, LayCool will meet WWE Diva’s Champion Natalya and her partner, Beth Phoenix, in the first ever Diva’s Table Match.”
Next up, Edge takes on Jack Swagger.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog How long have they been using the “HERE COME ALL THE DIVAS!!” music? It needs to go
@Niki_Sushi …. I think LayCool just got royally fucked. #justsayin #BWF #RAW
@seraphalexiel Wait. Did they say Divas tag team tables match? Did I hear that right? DID I HEAR THAT RIGHT?
@TKeep123 Kaitlyn! Welcome to #RAW! Oops, bye. #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
I’m a horrible person for continuing to laugh at Kane pushing Paul Bearer off the edge of the second floor… I really am.
You think you know me…
Edge vs Jack Swagger
Edge and Swagger lock up, but Swagger gets the momentum and slams Edge down to the ground. Swagger keeps momentum over Edge, throwing Edge across the ring and into the opposite corner. Edge, however, takes no shit, and beats Swagger, who manages to come back by dropping Edge stomach-first into his knee. Swagger goes for a cover, but Edge kicks out at two. Swagger then puts Edge in… a submission my brain isn’t providing a name for right now, but Edge fights to his feet and then eats the heel of Swagger’s boot. Swagger goes for another cover, but Edge kicks out. Here, Cole points out to us that TLC means Tables, Ladders, and Chairs. Thanks Cole! :B Edge fights off of Swagger’s shoulders and drops Swagger straight to the mat. Edge ducks a clothesline and slams into Swagger before dropping him to the mat and going for a cover. Swagger kicks out at two, and Edge goes to Whip him, but gets thrown to the mat, and he kicks out of Swagger’s cover at two. Swagger runs across the ring and goes to drop on Edge, but Edge lifts his legs and Swagger tries to lock in the ankle lock, but Edge rolls over. Swagger goes for the Gutwrench Powerbomb, which we haven’t seen in forever, and Edge counters out of it, dropping Swagger to the ground. He sets up for the Spear and hits it.
Edge wins via pinfall.
WWE Champion The Miz and Alex Riley are backstage talking about David Arquette. Miz says that he’ll be out there too. Arquette runs up and says that he and Miz have a lot in common: they have Hollywood careers, they’re both awesome. Riley says that Orton is dangerous and Arquette is delusional. Miz says he has one goal in mind: To put Orton through a table.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog Edge vs. Jack Swagger will be preempted for Jack Swagger vs. his t-shirt.
@Niki_Sushi I’ve always wondered what exactly they stare off into the distance at… is there a target saying ‘LOOK HERE’? #BWF #RAW
@TKeep123 Edge v. Swagger …not a bad match tonight! Edge wins! THPEAR! THPEAR! THPEAR! #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
Cool Smackdown vs RAW 2011 award thing.
WWE Moment of the Year Slammy will be presented by The Big Show! Show walks over to get a better mic, and says that there are many legendary moments in the WWE, and here are this year’s nominees: Cena rules fairly and is fired from the WWE. Sheamus attacks Triple H from behind during Triple H’s farewell speech. Edge Spears Jericho through the barrier. Shawn Michaels’ final match against The Undertaker.
Shawn Michaels!
Shawn couldn’t be here tonight, but he is on the Tron!!! Shawn says he can’t give away his location for fear the WWE would try to get him to come back, and he thanks everyone for making his life worth living, and Shawn tweeted that this part was taped earlier, so it’s NOT LIVE YOU LIARS! Shawn thanks everyone for the ride, and says that he doesn’t miss it, but misses the fans. Hopefully, we can all see each other very soon, and says good luck!
Later tonight, Cena takes on Otunga. Up next, Randy Orton will get great momentum going into TLC by defeating these two nobodies in Riley and Arquette… I mean… Will have a match.
<COMMERCIAL>
@FrankWWEClown The moment of the year HAS to be HBK/Taker. I was blessed to see it live, and I will never forget it. Brought tears to my eyes. #WWE
@TKeep123 Birth of AUSTIN 3:16 ….. still sends a chill down my spine.. Thank you Steve Austin! #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
@seraphalexiel Shawn Michaels, you were like no other. I’m happy that you’re happy. Thank you for everything
I hear voices in my head…
Randy Orton vs. Alex Riley and David Arquette
Looks like Riley will start out with Orton, because he didn’t learn last week, and the two go to lock up, but Orton is obviously pissed, and he beats the hell out of Riley in the corner. He then Whips Riley, who counters it, and then Riley is smacked to the ground. Orton uppercuts him, then goes for the cover, but Riley kicks out at two. Riley is then hurled around the ring, but Orton runs right into Riley’s feet. Arquette gets tagged in and jumps on Orton, who looks at him like he’s an idiot, and then kicks him in the stomach. Orton starts pounding the mat, and wisely tags in Riley who looks at him like he’s an idiot, but Orton drops him in a back breaker. Orton then smashes his foot into Riley’s face. But, Riley moves when Orton goes to drop his knee in Riley’s face, but Orton still kicks out of the cover. Orton fights back against Riley, and then delivers a knee to Orton’s midsection as Orton goes to him. When the ref isn’t looking, Arquette has Orton in a headlock. Riley then walks into Orton’s fist, but then Riley runs into the clothesline. Orton then scoop slams Riley and jerks around, chucking Riley back to the mat. Riley gets up, Orton hits the RKO, and that’s all she wrote.
Randy Orton wins via pinfall.
After the match, Miz slams the Money in the Bank briefcase into Orton’s’ head, and Arquette is going to help him this time around. Like a dumbass. Miz gets the table set up, and gets Orton up. Punk pretends that he has no idea what Miz is going to do, and Miz and Arquette go to double suplex Orton into the table, but Orton counters and beats Miz down. He goes to power bomb Miz, but Arquette gets him out of it. Miz rolls out of the ring, and Arquette is left to take the power bomb through the table.
Coming up, John Cena takes on David Otunga.
<COMMERCIAL>
@TKeep123 David Arquette….rocking Evel Kenevil ninja-style! #WWE #RAW #BWF #Slammy
@Niki_Sushi Tool of the Year award. Who would win? David Arquette or Michael Cole? #BWF #RAW
Cole comes out and says that 2010 had some great quotes. The Nominees for the And I Quote Line of the Year are from Santino, Cena, Edge… and so many others. My favorite is Cody’s “Don’t breathe on me”.
Seriously? Michael Cole. I think he’s lying. He pulls the ‘I wasn’t expecting this’ thing and pulls out a paper. The thanks the non-existent Cole Miners and The Miz, and the sound guys cut him off. Good. Anyway. Superstar of the Year awards is next.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog “Crack binge with Amy Winehouse” and “Of course you have an email you idiot, just read it.”
@HitTheRopes Wooo!!! @TitusNXT always makes it a win!
@seraphalexiel “Duct tape? Are you serious?”
@FrankWWEClown I’ll be accepting my award for “And I Quote of the Year” for….”I HATE YOU HEATH SLATER, I HATE YOU!!!” Tootin’ my own horn. 🙂 #WWE
Teddy Long is going to present the Superstar of the Year Slammy! The nominees are Edge, WWE Champion The Miz, World Heavyweight Champion Kane, John Cena, Rey Mysterio, and Randy Orton.
John Cena.
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RUFFLES TOO!
Cena comes out and thanks everyone for not giving up on him. He says that this award was our award to give away and he finds it amazing that we gave it to him because up to an hour ago he didn’t have a job. It’s been a crazy year: he was forced to join the Nexus (only good thing being that he could pee in Barrett’s coffee), he was fired (and got to tailgate with the WWE Universe), and there’s magic on Bourbon Street. Cena says that what happened to him was his own fault, but he is now back fulltime on RAW. He will continue to be a man of his word. He has gotten to each and every member of the Nexus except Otunga and Barrett. Tonight, when Otunga steps in the ring, he doesn’t care if he brings Hasky, McG, the dude from something (AXE MURDERER!) or the chick from Wendy’s, Otunga is getting hurt. Sunday at TLC, every ounce of frustration, misery, anger will be unleashed. This Sunday, at TLC, we have his word: Wade Barrett will be destroyed.
John Cena vs. David Otunga
Barrett takes the mic and says that before the match starts, he wants to remind Cena what happened earlier, what’s going to happen tonight, and what will happen on Sunday.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Nexus attacks Cena and Barrett attacks Cena with a chair.>
Otunga turns around and high fives Nexus, or forearm bump, or something, except Barrett. Otunga walks down to the ring. Fina-fuckin-lly.
And now, like last week with Barrett, the Nexus slowly walks out on Otunga.
Cena, however, wants to fight, so he forces Otunga into the ring and smacks Otunga Show-style., then again on the back. Cena knees Otunga in the stomach, and chucks Otunga to the mat. Cena Whips Otunga across the ring, then runs his shoulder into Otunga’s face. Cena throws Otunga into the corner, then Whips him back around the ring, and Otunga finally moves. Otunga wails on Cena, bouncing around like a ping pong ball, and then goes back to Cena. Otunga goes for the cover, but Cena kicks out. Otunga goes to lift Cena, but Cena drops him with a drop toe hold and locks in the STF. Otunga taps out.
John Cena wins via submission.
Cena grabs a chair as Barrett walks out with a chair again. Cena then proceeds to use that chair on Otunga. And again. And again. And again. Cena then drags Otunga to the middle of the ring, and then massacres Otunga with it. Barrett seems more amused than scared, Cena.
So, there’s the Slammys! I have an idea in mind for something for those of you who tweet for me every week, but I have to see if it’ll work out. Keep an eye on my Twitter, and on the BWF website, because I may post it there if I don’t wait until next week. Thanks a lot, and I’ll be back for you next week!
The Power Poll has been taken over by Don Owens of Future-Endeavors.com, and we here at BoredWrestlingFan would like to welcome him here in his first week…
1. Wade Barrett (last week: 1)
The leader of the Nexus proved he can win matches on his own with a victory over R-Truth, and proved he’s in control of The Nexus by forcing John Cena to don the black and yellow t-shirt this past Monday on RAW. (My vote: 1)
2. Randy Orton (3)
The WWE Champion RKO’d anything that moved on Monday Night, but failed to take out John Cena, perhaps his biggest threat this Sunday at Survivor Series. (My vote: 2)
3. Edge (2)
The Rated R Superstar failed to exile David Otunga from The Nexus thanks to interference from Kane. However, Edge had the last laugh when he kidnapped Paul Bearer and caused enough of a distraction for The Big Show to pick up a victory over the World Heavyweight Champion. (My vote: 3)
4. John Cena (6)
After easily defeating Alex Riley in a match, Cena not only avoided being punted in the head by Randy Orton, he managed to hit him with an Attitude Adjustment – followed by one for Wade Barrett. (My vote: N/A)
5. Kane (5)
A loss for the World Heavyweight Champion, even if it was because of a distraction from Edge, leaves him at number 5. (My vote: 4)
6. Daniel Bryan (9)
The American Dragon impressed voters this week by holding off SmackDown’s All American American, Jack Swagger on RAW. (My vote: 9)
7. Alberto Del Rio (7)
His name is Alberto Del Rio, but of course, you already knew that. A victory over Sergeant Slaughter on RAW capped off a good week for Alberto, who defeated Kofi Kingston on SmackDown, was announced by Tito Santana, and was driven into the arena by Chavo Classic. (My vote: 7)
8. Dolph Ziggler (NR)
Apparently, appearing on both shows and winning helps big time in the Power Poll, because Dolph Ziggler retained his Intercontinental Championship against MVP on Friday and put Sexual Chocolate Mark Henry to sleep on Monday. (My vote: N/A)
9. Jeff Hardy (8)
TNA’s World Champion is the only thing that keeps them on this poll sometimes. And here, Jeff Hardy is hanging out near the bottom with his ugly new Immortal Championship. (My vote: 5)
10. Santino (10)
Two weeks running for Santino? Holy crap! Hanging out with The Iron Sheik and defeating the Usos through use of The Cobra(!!!!) will definitely get you votes here on the Power Poll! (My vote: 6)
Dropped Out: The Miz
I also voted for: Ezekiel Jackson (8) and Jim Ross (10)
The Power Poll is a weekly top 10 ranking of wrestlers as voted by members of these wonderful sites: BoredWrestlingFan.com, Future Endeavors, Hit the Ropes, NoVaWPodcast, Oh My WrestleBlog, Online World of Wrestling, PIZZABODYSLAM, Pro Wrestling Ponderings, Project Wonderboy, Ringside Rants, Smark Out Moment, Smarks Anonymous, The Superplex, The Wrestling Blog, WrestlingAdikt.com, WrestleRage.com, Wrestling Nuggets and Wrestlespective. Follow the Power Poll voters on Twitter.
Power Poll No. 23 11/10/10
1. Wade Barrett (5)
Barrett’s assertive leadership over The Nexus has gained him more power amongst the Power Poll voters. (My vote: 2)
2. Edge (2)
On the face side of the proverbial fence again, Edge has once again started to run roughshod over the Blue Brand. Pinning David Otunga to give Team SmackDown the victory over The Nexus helps The Rated R Superstar maintain his position at number two. (My vote: 6)
3. Randy Orton (3)
The voices in his head may not be enough come Survivor Series with the odds stacked firmly against him. Despite finding himself on the losing end of a Wade Barrett pinfall victory for Nexus, The Viper stands strong at number 3. (My vote: 5)
4. The Miz (7)
How do you bounce back up the ranks of the Power Poll? Dropping the WWE Champion skull first into the canvas when you’re supposed to be his partner certainly helps. (My vote: 4)
5. Kane (1)
The World Heavyweight Champion drops way down this week, finding himself on the winning end of a tag team match that was dominated by another member of his team, who happens to be his Survivor Series opponent. (My vote: 9)
6. John Cena (6)
Hilarious promos and wins over future endeavor fodder are fun sometimes, but not when you’re John Cena, apparently, as Mr. Invisible once again charts at number 6. (My vote: 3)
7. Alberto Del Rio (10)
Del Rio continues to impress the Power Poll voters every week, and has found his way back up to number 7. (My vote: N/A)
8. Jeff Hardy (9)
Despite having to face Matt Morgan instead of his scheduled opponent Mr. Anderson, Jeff Hardy shined in the main event at Turning Point, retaining his gold in the process. (My vote: 7)
9. Daniel Bryan (4)
With yet another strong showing in a big match setting, Daniel Bryan continues to show the world that he is the absolute best at what he does. (My vote: N/A)
10. Santino Marella (NR)
Living proof that non-wrestling segments can be just as – if not more – entertaining as the matches on a wrestling show, Santino’s tea party with “Shay-moose” was hilarious enough to boost the Milan Miracle – for the first time, I’m willing to bet – onto the Power Poll (My vote: 1)
Dropped out: Matt Morgan
I also voted for: Rob Van Dam (8) and Vladimir Kozlov (10)
The Power Poll is a weekly top 10 ranking of wrestlers as voted by members of these wonderful sites: BoredWrestlingFan.com, Future Endeavors, Hit the Ropes, NoVaWPodcast, Oh My WrestleBlog, Online World of Wrestling, PIZZABODYSLAM, Pro Wrestling Ponderings, Project Wonderboy, Ringside Rants, Smark Out Moment, Smarks Anonymous, The Superplex, The Wrestling Blog, WrestlingAdikt.com, WrestleRage.com, Wrestling Nuggets and Wrestlespective. Follow the Power Poll voters on Twitter.
Hello everyone, and welcome to another exciting RAW review!! Tickets for Wrestlemania 27, as well as the birthdays of both ThinkSoJoE and randomredhead are in only five days!! Let’s just say that’s a really good birthday idea… And there’s my random plug. So, what is it that’s going to happen this week? More John Cena and Nexus drama, of course, but what else? Will Daniel Bryan make someone else tap out? Will Cole finally shut up? Who knows?!
Tonight, the Divas are having a Six-Diva Tag Team match they’re calling the Diva Cup, and Wade Barrett is comin’ home!! What kind of a homecoming celebration will he get??
John Cena is in the middle of the ring, representing Nexus, and has a giant scroll. Old style scroll. Pretty neat lookin, actually. H reads that it is his distinct honor to introduce us to the man who has promised and delivered the winds of change. The leader of the most devastating, dominant, and revolutionary force to step foot in the WWE known as the Nexus. At Survivor Series, he will be your WWE Champion. Please welcome, making his long-awaited, triumphant return home to Manchester, England, Wade Barrett.
We walk alone, through the unknown…
Huh. Josh Matthews is taking over for Jerry Lawler tonight, but Cole’s still there. Damn it.
Nexus is in the ring, and Barrett thanks Cena for his outstanding introduction, that he wrote. Barrett says that the prodigal son has returned, and they cheer. Go England. Barrett says that there’s no better way to celebrate his upcoming championship reign than to have a preview of the celebration tonight. Tonight, there’s going to be a big party, and all of Manchester is invited. Before the Nexus hoists Barrett victoriously above their shoulders, there is business that he needs to take care of. Barrett says there were a couple issues that occurred last week that he needs to look into.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Otunga brings Nexus to Smackdown and gets a Spear and a loss for Nexus.>
Barrett tells Otunga to step forward. He says next time Otunga undermines his authority, to take Nexus to Smackdown without his permission, make sure he’s successful. He orders Otunga back in line, and says he’ll deal with him later. Right now, he wants to deal with Cena.
Last week, Cena had the opportunity on RAW to showcase what he would do at Survivor Series during Barrett’s match with Orton. Instead, he missed the tag and ended up declaring Orton and Truth the winners.
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Orton and Truth defeat Barrett and Otunga.>
Barrett tells Cena to explain himself. Cena says that it all started as a joke, and mentions all the stuff that happened when he was wrapping. Barrett says that he was talking about that match and asks what happened. Cena says they lost. Barrett warns Cena not to test him and says that Cena’s lucky he’s in his home town, and no one will ruin his celebration. The simple fact is, Cena is either free of Nexus or fired. Cena either raises Barrett’s hand and awards him the WWE title, or Barrett flushes his entire WWE career down the toilet. Cena says he’s glad Barrett’s home, glad his countrymen embrace him, and he hopes that Barrett remembers what he said last week: After that match is over, he’s going to give Barrett and anyone who interferes, the beating of a lifetime. Barrett says Cena’s cute, and he holds Cena’s destiny in his hand, but at Survivor Series, Cena’s going to do what Barrett tells him to, but now they need to practice what will happen after the match at Survivor Series. He wants Cena to tell the world that Wade Barrett is the new WWE Champion. Cena says he hasn’t won anything yet, and Barrett says it’s a practice. Cena says whatever.
I hear voices in my head…
Randy Orton comes out and stays on the stage, looking at Nexus. He says last time he checked, he was still WWE Champion. It’s true Wade has Cena under his thumb, but Barrett is fighting Orton, not Cena, and he doesn’t doubt that he can beat Barrett regardless of the referee. Orton doesn’t care if Cena is free or fired, but he is going to make sure Orton will never have the WWE Champion. Barrett says that last time he checked, he had an army standing behind him at his beck and call, and he doesn’t recall Orton having anyone behind him.
And I quote: “Wade Barrett’s championship celebration preview has been officially cancelled. Also, to insure that there is a decisive victor, the WWE title match must be won by pinfall or submission only. Furthermore, I am officially announcing that the remaining members of Nexus will be banned from ringside. But Wade, that’s at Survivor Series. As for tonight, since Wade Barrett has an army behind him, Randy Orton is going to have one as well. Team Barrett, comprised of Nexus, will take on Team Orton, in a ten man tag team match. I, the General Manager, will personally choose the members of Orton’s team later, but I do know this: the special guest referee for this match will be John Cena.”
Cena knocks over the Nexus podium, and then shoves Otunga as he walks up. Cena then walks out of the ring.
The Diva’s Cup tag match is next!
<COMMERCIAL>
@CawCawBang and i quote shut your dirty pie hole!
@KickStunner Orton comin out like “I’M IN THIS STORY LINE TOO YOU KNOW!”
@TKeep123 Wade Barrett ain’t happy! <G> Cena’s doing stand-up comedy and Otunga is changing has drawers. #RAW #WWE #BWF
@thinksojoe Cena is gold in this promo #BWF
@KeepItFiveStar LOL that was funny. I gotta admit it, Cena
@kickoutblog Nexus has their own calligraphy? Classy!
Diva’s Cup: Eve Torres, Nikki, and Brie Bella vs. Maryse, Tamina, and Alicia Fox
Eve and Tamina start out, and Tamina shoves Tamina back in the corner. She then kicks her hard in the stomach, but eve gets out of the corner and gets Tamina in there, hitting some hard kicks on Tamina before Irish Whipping her, only to get it countered, and then dropped by Tamina with a Samoan drop, going for a cover for Eve to kick out. Tamina tags in Maryse, who goes for a cover only for Eve to kick out. Maryse shoves Eve around the ring a little before taunting the Bellas and holding Eve in a headlock before shoving her down and doing it again. Eve gets up to her feet, and fights out, hitting a kick to Maryse’s head. Eve and Maryse tag in Alicia and Brie, according to the other Twin, and Alicia starts to hit something, but Brie counters for the pin, does something, then goes for another pin. Tamina breaks it up, Eve chases her down, Maryse gets in, Nikki gets chased out of the ring by the ref, and then Maryse hits the French Kiss on Brie. Nikki runs in and switches places, and then pins Alicia.
Eve Torres and the Bella Twins win via pinfall.
Nexus is backstage, and Otunga says that Cena tried to punk them. Barrett walks up and interrupts his pep talk, and Otunga says that he was just telling everyone that they need to step it up. Barrett says that Otunga won’t be a part of Team Barrett, but put in a singles match against Cena. Barrett says that he wants Otunga to give it everything, and he’ll tell Cena the exact same thing. Nexus then walks away, leaving Otunga alone.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi Got talent? The only thing the Bellas have is a professional job as escorts.
@KeepItFiveStar I hate “Twin Magic”
@CawCawBang maryse whip her hair back and forth
@TKeep123 Diva Match…the white shorts look like diapers! #RAW #WWE
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Natalya beats Michelle McCool to become Number One Contender for the Diva’s Championship at Survivor Series.>
The Hart Dynasty, Tyson Kidd and David Hart Smith with Natalya vs. Jimmy and Jey Uso
Smith and one of the Usos is in right now, Jimmy, and Smith gets a big advantage , knocking Jey out, then Jimmy right after. Smith tags Kidd in, and Kidd jumps over the ring, hitting a hurricanrana on one of the Usos. Kidd then throws the other one into the ring, missing an elbow drop. The Uso in the ring shoves Kidd into the corner, and the other one is tagged in. I can’t tell the different, could you tell? Usos get the advantage, then tag in. Smith looks like he’s about to walk out, and then the Usos go for another tag on Kidd, who kicks out. Apparently Jey has a tattoo on his chest and Jimmy doesn’t. Whichever one is in the ring keeps, Kidd over, but misses a drop on Jimmy, who is in the ring. Jimmy tags in Jey, while Kidd manages to tag in Smith, who decided to stay. Smith hits a belly-to-belly, and goes for a cover, only for Jey to kick out. Smith hits the running bulldog, but Jimmy breaks up the pin. Kidd slides between the ropes to attack Jimmy, who dishes back some pain, and then Smith has to get Jimmy off the apron. Jey hits the splash on Smith and pins him for the win.
Jimmy and Jey Uso win via pinfall.
Am I the only one who started singing Mark Henry’s theme when the Uso theme hit?
Coming up, Tea Time With Santino, featuring Sheamus. This is amazing. Also coming up, David Otunga will take on John Cena.
<COMMERCIAL>
@KeepItFiveStar If only every wrestler called their name out before they did stuff like the Usos “MAN MOUNTAIN ROCK!” *Splash*
@kickoutblog The Usos? The guys who almost killed The Hart Dynasty’s career are back to finish the job once and for all?
@thinksojoe The Usos totally ripped off the Godsmack logo #BWF
@Niki_Sushi Goddamn. Uso’s should get a bigger crowd reaction. They have fucking SKILL, bitches.
@TKeep123 TEA with SANTINO !!!!! “Business is about to pick up!” A little Earl Gray for Sheamus? #RAW #WWE
Next week, WWE goes Old School on RAW, and it starts at 8 PM!! I’ll do my best to be here, so so should you!
Matt Striker is backstage and asks Orton who he thinks the GM will pick as his partners. Orton says he has no idea and he has to care who his partners are. His teams had better be the best of the best.
The Miz interrupts and says that he just heard from the GM, so he can tell Orton that one member of his team is him. Orton doesn’t need to worry about getting the best, because right now his team is awesome.
Slater and Gabriel are looking at their belts, Harris and McGuillicutty are talking, and Otunga comes back. No one says anything, and Otunga says that he meant Cena, not them. Otunga says that he’ll show them how a leader handles stuff, and that they should all be out there, since they’re a team. Gabriel asks if Barrett knows, and Otunga says that they shouldn’t need to ask, and they’re either Nexus or against us, and he’ll see them out there. They don’t agree.
<COMMERCIAL>
@TKeep123 Otunga soundin ‘mighty white’ in that last scene……like Beaver Cleaver. #WWE #RAW #BWF
@thinksojoe If they don’t break out either the old RAW letters set or the neon set next week, I will be severely disappointed. #BWF
@kickoutblog I find Nexus’ race relations to be a bit shady. I’m onto you, and I’m not fooled by the one hillbilly you kicked out of the group either!
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Ted DiBiase and Maryse crash the wedding of Goldust and Aksana, only for Ted DiBiase to save it. Confused yet? Oh, yeah, and Aksana slaps the taste out of Goldust after they’re declared married.>
Goldust comes out, looking pretty pissed off. Poor guy. I like Goldust.
Goldust vs. Ted DiBiase with Maryse
Goldust painted tears on his face tonight.
Ted and Goldust start out busy, DiBiase getting an advantage, only to get thrown by Goldust. Goldust clotheslines him out of the ring, and DiBiase climbs back in, bouncing off the ropes, and right into an inverted atomic drop. DiBiase goes to town beating on Goldust’s head, throwing Goldust around the ring. DiBiase goes for a cover, but Goldust kicks out. Another cover, but Goldust kicks out again. DiBiase keeps putting pressure on Goldust’s head, but Goldust fights back, and DiBiase goes for a cover, but Goldust kicks out. DiBiase tells Maryse to go get the Million Dollar Championship, and she does. Goldust fights back, hitting an uppercut, then the running bulldog and into a cover. DiBiase kicks out at two, and Goldust throws Ted, who counters, and then DiBiase gets hit by a scoop slam. Aksana comes down to the ring, and tries to take the belt, slapping Maryse and then running away with the belt. Goldust steals a pin and starts to follow Aksana, then does follow her up the ramp.
Goldust wins via pinfall.
<COMMERCIAL>
@KeepItFiveStar As much as I like Maryse’s heels, shes rockin some sexy boots. #allblackeverything
@Niki_Sushi Maryse looks fucking amazing, as always. #BWF #RAW
@CawCawBang nah the reason she isn’t coming near the commentary desk is because you’re a female replete cole
@kickoutblog Seriously, Michael Cole is beyond unbearable.
BRRRRRRRR SHUFFLE POO!!
John Cena vs David Otunga
Well then. Otunga makes his way out to the ring, and Nexus actually makes their way down the ramp. I am a little shocked to see them out. I thought they’d just ditch them, but surprise!
Oh. Look at that. Now they’re leaving. I so knew it.
Otunga takes off up the ramp, and Cena chases him down, knocking him down and then throwing him into the car on the stage. Cena then literally runs Otunga back down to the ring, right inside. Cena hits Otunga with a clothesline, and hits what I think was a gut wrench power bomb. Swagger’s throwing a tantrum on Smackdown right now. Anyway, Cena keeps an advantage over Otunga, hitting his new favorite move, the standing dropkick on Otunga, before slamming his face in the turnbuckle. Cena then whips Otunga across the ring, but Otunga moves before he can get hit. Otunga takes advantage, hitting Cena repeatedly. Otunga goes for a cover, but Cena kicks out. The crowd is screwing with me, but, whatever. Otunga is beating the shit out of Cena, and then hits an elbow drop before going for a cover. Cena kicks out. Otunga steps on Cena, then misses another elbow, and Cena fights back, hitting the shoulder blocks, then setting up the Five Knuckle Shuffle.. Cena hits the Attitude Adjustment, but doesn’t go for the cover yet. He grabs him and puts him in the STF.
John Cena wins via submission.
<COMMERCIAL>
@ThingsColeSays Holy crap, I think Mark Henry could beat David Otunga in a foot race after seeing that.
Otunga’s in the back, icing his neck, when Barrett walks up. Barrett says last week, he got pinned in their tag team match, and then he decided to take Nexus to Smackdown, and got pinned again. And tonight, in Barrett’s home town, Otunga embarrassed him. Barrett’s giving Otunga a chance to redeem himself: Take Nexus back to Smackdown and have a match with Edge. If Otunga doesn’t beat Edge, he’s done.
Holy shit. Santino and Vladimir Kozlov, dressed like English gentlemen, walk out. Santino says that he and Kozlov like to blend in. They were excited to come to the UK, and they watched the Bond movies, Austin Powers, Mr. Bean, and a bunch of others. They think they know everything about the culture now. He says that every time he crosses the roads he almost gets killed, and he asks everyone to drive on the other side just for him.
Santino says that he wants to make peace with Sheamus. He was angry, so they’re going to have an old-style classic tea party, and everything will be okay.
Sheamus walks down to the ring, looking rather unimpressed. Santino says hi and then shakes Sheamus’ hand, who doesn’t know proper hand-shaking etiquette, because he holds on too long. They all sit down, and Santino says they got off on the wrong foot, and they want to be on the right foot. Santino says that they have something, and ginger tea, which he apologizes for, and an autographed picture of Mr. T. Sheamus says that he thinks he got Santino all wrong: he’s not bad, just misunderstood. Sheamus knew a guy back home in Ireland who only had one friend, and just like Santino, his friend was a donkey. Everyone in the town called him the village idiot. Santino mistakes it to be the donkey called the village idiot. Santino says it’s time for tea, and asks Sheamus if he takes his tea dark or milky. And apologizes for that, saying that he’s not trying to be smart, and he’s not referring to the fact that Sheamus has no pigmentation. And asks them not to make him angry, because Santino doesn’t like it when he’s angry. Santino says that Sheamus has rage inside him, and it’s either because he’s been over exposed to gamma rays, or when he was growing up, he was excluded from activities with other kids because he’s a ginger.
Santino says that they’re generous, but they aren’t helping. Santino says he won’t exclude Sheamus from activities, and he won’t treat Sheamus like a ghost – Ooh… Sheamus says Santino’s a funny person, and Santino had him laughing so hard he forgot why he hated him in the first place. Santino says that he can’t remember why Sheamus hates him either. Kozlov helpfully points out that Sheamus hates him because he beat him. Kozlov keeps pointing it out, and Sheamus isn’t happy anymore. Kozlov thinks it’s funny anyway.
Santino says that he doesn’t like the way Sheamus is looking at him, and pours Sheamus more tea, with a shaky hand, then all over his lap. Santino says that he’s sorry, and Sheamus flips the table.
“The time for tea and crumpets has come to an end. It’s now time for action. Clear the ring, and clear Vladimir Kozlov from ringside as well, because Santino Marella is going one on one with Sheamus.”
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi Kozlov… you’re going to get Santino killed. And he won’t have a clue why. #BWF #RAW
@FrankWWEClown A Kozlov chant. Only in the United Kingdom, indeed. I love it. #WWE #RAW
@thinksojoe Gingers have no souls! #BWF
@Niki_Sushi THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING! He’s the red-headed stepchild! #BWF #RAW
@WWEsAngel_Nef Shea-Moose looks like he’s trying so hard not to laugh xD #WWE
@RingsideRants Kozlov has already shown more personality than ever before… and he hasn’t even talked yet.
@TKeep123 Loving Koslov right now! “Biggest upset in Duble, duble E History…..EVER!” #WWE #RAW #BWF
Santino Marella vs Sheamus
Sheamus is still in the suit thing, and is trying to take the shirt off. Sheamus is looking at Santino like he’s a tard, and Santino ducks under the rope, shrieking like a woman. Higher than me, and I’m a soprano. Santino rolls out of the ring and then starts to get back in, but Sheamus distracts the ref. Santino runs into the crowd, and Sheamus starts to follow him. Sheamus says he wants Santino in the ring.
“Santino Marella, you have two choices. Get back in the ring and compete, or be immediately suspended.”
Santino asks, right now? And Sheamus motions for Santino to get into the ring. Santino riles himself up and climbs into the ring. He starts to go for the Cobra, but Sheamus knocks him on his back and stomps him. You can hear Santino go ‘ow’ every time he’s hit too. Santino continuously crawls for the ropes, but Sheamus tugs him to the middle of the ring. Sheamus looks unimpressed at Santino’s begging, and Santino hits a low blow on Sheamus and gets disqualified. Santino considers it a victory.
Sheamus wins via disqualification.
Sheamus gets up and hits the Brogue Kick on Santino. Sheamus then proceeds to destroy Santino. Sheamus gets Santino up, but Morrison runs into the ring and fights against Sheamus, hitting the flash kick on Sheamus and knocking him out of the ring. Morrison drags Santino to the other side of the ring.
Cena’s standing backstage, looking at the promo for Wrestlemania XXVII. Barrett joined him during the little commercial. Barrett comments on Wrestlemania, and tells Cena to imagine never being able to experience that again. In two weeks, all Cena has to do is raise Barrett’s hand and name him the WWE Champion, and he can experience Wrestlemania all he wants. Then, the Nexus will be nothing but a distant memory. Tonight, Cena needs to do it right, or his career will be nothing but a distant memory.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi Oooh… Santino, you fight dirty. You just opened the doors for Sheamus to rip your balls off. #BWF #RAW
@TKeep123 Fear The (Below the Belt) Cobra!!!! Santino! #WWE #RAW #BWF
@KeepItFiveStar John Morrison should interfere in a hat and tux also. But somehow John Morrison is gonna Parkour his way into this match shirtless.
@kickoutblog Ever notice whenever someone says “do the right thing” in wrestling, it’s always the wrong thing?
<VIDEO PACKAGE: Second and Third Generation Superstars Stand Up For WWE.>
I hear voices…
WWE Champion Randy Orton, The Miz, R-Truth, Daniel Bryan, and Mark Henry vs Wade Barrett, WWE Tag Team Champions Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel, Husky Harris, and Michael McGuillicutty
I warn you all now. I can’t keep up with matches with more than six people, apparently, so this isn’t going to be the best review of the match. Besides, the good stuff doesn’t happen until the match is over anyway.
<COMMERCIAL>
@Niki_Sushi I totally squee’gasmed over baby Cody and Ted. Hell, over all of it. That’s fuckin tradition. #BWF #RAW
@TKeep123 OK, I admit it, those private home photos of the legends rocked my boat. #WWE #RAW #BWF
@KeepItFiveStar Why are Mark Henry and Orton boys. Remember when Henry destroyed him and turned face?
@HitTheRopes Can we blow R-Truth up again, please? #wwe
I can tell you that Bryan and Gabriel start. So far, I’m doing good! And I missed whatever it was Bryan did, but Gabriel ducks under Bryan and tags in McGuillicutty. Bryan gets an advantage, and Miz tags himself in, hitting McGuillicutty from behind. Miz gets him in the corner, and Cena pulls Miz off of him. Hear the Miz is Awesome chants? I love it. Miz went for a cover, but McGuillicutty kicked out. Miz tags in Orton. Orton proceeds to beat McGuillicutty more, telling Barrett to come in. Instead, he tells Slater to get in. Orton toys with Slater, tagging in Truth. Truth beats Slater in the corner and then Irish Whips him, countering a counter-Whip, and then does his fancy shit to avoid getting hit. Truth goes for a cover, but Gabriel breaks it up, and then everyone runs in the ring. Team Orton clears the ring of Nexus, and Otunga makes his way out, walking down the ramp.
<COMMERCIAL>
@kickoutblog I think I figured out what pisses me off about Cole. Ever since his “turn,” it feels like he’s stopped taking his job seriously.
@KeepItFiveStar Did Orton just flex on Heath Slater to make him fall?
@TKeep123 R Truth in the UK: “I say, what is Up?” #WWE #RAW #BWF
@WWEsAngel_Nef I never thought I’d live to see the day when George Bush and Santino Marella would be dueling trending topics worldwide on twitter #WWE #BWF
Order has been restored, and it’s Truth and Gabriel in the ring. Otunga’s standing ringside, in front of the announce table. Truth is just smacking the shit out of Gabriel, who flips over him and takes him down, going for a cover, and Truth kicks out. Gabriel tags in Harris, and I die a little inside. Truth fights Harris, Irish Whipping him, only for Harris to counter, and Henry is tagged in. Harris delvers some blows to Henry, who knocks him on his ass. Henry then lifts Harris and slams him down. Mark Henry then goes to hit something, but misses. Harris then flings himself into Harris, and tags in McGuillicutty who is taken down by Henry. Henry tags in Bryan. Bryan delivers a series of hard kicks, getting whipped into the corner, but running up the ropes. Bryan’s really giving it to McGuillicutty, but can’t put him away. McGuillicutty comes back, and Harris tags in, after Bryan tries to hit the LaBell Lock. Harris knocks him out and beats him up for a bit. Harris has Bryan by the Nexus corner and Barrett tags in.
Bryan kicks out of a cover (just letting your eyes rest a bit). Barrett dominates Bryan, going for another cover, only for Bryan to kick out. Bryan fights to his feet, and Barrett plants Bryan, ending his quick defense. Bryan kicks out at two from the cover, and Barrett tags in Gabriel, who tags in Harris, who tags in Slater. Slater misses a run and this the corner instead. Both men are down, and Slater knocks Miz off the rope, only for Bryan to clothesline him. Both men struggle to make a tag, and Bryan tags in Orton and Slater tags in Barrett. Orton plants Barrett with s coop slam, and then hits the DDT off the ropes. Orton gets down and pounds on the mat, glancing over his shoulder to make sure Nexus doesn’t come in. Barrett lifts Orton, who fights out, and then delivers a back breaker to Barrett. McGuillicutty comes in, breaks it up, and Truth plants him to the ground. Gabriel comes in and hits a super kick, Henry, hits the World’s Strongest Slam on him, then Slater and Harris come in and throw him off the ring, and then Bryan dropkicks both of them out of the ring. Orton and Barrett get to their feet. Barrett tries the Wasteland, Orton hits a back breaker. Otunga manages to get Cena’s attention, and Riley attacks Orton with the briefcase, only for Miz to hit the Skull Crushing Finale on Orton. Barrett pins for the win.
Team Barrett wins via pinfall.
Well, the Miz betrayal wasn’t expected, but it does provide an interesting question. Will he try to cash in after Survivor Series? What’ll happen to him next week? I’ll see you then.